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 Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 9:44 am
Is there anything more egocentric than a journal? Oooh, I'm such a deep person that my thoughts cannot be contained to my head! I must record them in a book that's probably bound in ornate leather with fancywork all around the boarder! Because my thoughts are so secret and private I must put a lock on the book so that nobody but me can read it!
What a complete load of wher-s**t.
Seriously.
I swear half the point of a diary is for teenage girls to clutch to their less than ample bosom while they sigh at their crush across the room. Then they can open it and write in it, glancing up and sighing at him (or her) at appropriate intervals. That's what a diary is; a tool to make yourself look deeper and more interesting than you really are, an attempt to hide from yourself and the world the fact that you're just one more mundane little sod slogging your way through life until you croak.
That said, this is my diary.
If you're reading it I hope you're prepared to have your thumbs broken.
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Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 9:48 am
So who am I? Who exactly is the owner of this self indulgent tome, which is only not leatherbound because I couldn't afford it? It would have been black leather by the way, and the ornate border would probably have been a pattern of skulls and daggers because I'm just that tough and edgy.
Well in short I'm a misanthropic, disaffected, acerbic harper and dragon rider who was in the kitchen when all the social grace was being passed out at the great party of life. If you want more detail (and I add once again, your thumbs broken) then read on. Name: C'tis
Age: 20 23
Orientation: Bi (leans heavily towards women)
Craft/rank: Harper / apprentice
Description: C'tis stands just about dead on six feet tall; he possesses a powerful build, and a hard square-jawed face. A scar from a slash wound runs straight down across his right eye from mid forehead to just below the cheekbone but the eyelid and eye are not damaged thanks to the knife skipping off his orbit bone. His eyes and hair are both dark chestnut brown; the former are usually glowering or sneering and the latter is usually spiky and unruly. He favours dark colours in his clothing, especially black, and always seems to be wearing the same pair of heavy knee boots that look designed for kicking things.
He actually has a very pleasant smile, not that it comes up often.
During the revolution he acquired a slash across his face that has healed to a deep diagonal scar across his right eye; luckily the eye is undamaged as the knife that made it skipped off the orbit bone before cutting into the cheek below. It is a livid purple colour at the moment, and still a little swollen.
Personality: Sharp, prickly, short-tempered and volatile; C'tis is not a man to trifle with. He is a malcontent, and a born cynic; when social grace was being handed out, he was definitely in another room. Why should charm be everything, he would like to know? He’s an intelligent man (not brilliant but definitely bright, and possessed of a healthy dose of practicality too), and yet he struggles to form and maintain friendships. Deep under his spikes and acerbic temperament is a man who would love to have a large group of friends, but can’t seem to get them. Because of this failing in himself (he definitely sees it as a failing) C'tis decided a long time ago that if he couldn't be liked then he’d at least be respected, or failing that feared.
To be respected or feared a man must be tougher than nails, and so that’s what C'tis has made himself; his rough, tough, remorseless image is all important to him. Unfortunately, it is this determination to stick to his ‘next best thing to being liked’ that is actually part of the reason he struggles to make friends. C'tis has a temper. A real temper. Call him volatile, and you’d be right; call him that to his face, and you’d certainly find yourself on the receiving end of his considerable ire. So, he’s prone to fits of anger and saying unpleasant things in the heat of the moment... But he wants to be liked. He regrets his outbursts, but he can’t be liked, so he has to be tough, so he never shows his remorse, so people dislike him more, so he gets angrier, so he becomes more vicious, so he regrets that too, but he can’t apologize.... It’s a real vicious circle, one that he might well never break free of. So far as he's concerned pretty much everyone will stab you in the back given half a chance, so why even take the risk? Remaining a man aloof without close connections might be lonely, but it's safer.
Despite his rough attitude with others, loyalty in general in fact is one of his major redeeming features; when he actually does manage to form a solid relationship with somebody he will stick by them through thick, thin, forest fires, being dragged out of bed at stupid o' clock to help with something and so on and so forth. Betrayal is something C'tis deals poorly with, and at first tries not to deal with at all through denial. If there is not a shadow of a doubt that somebody he trusted and cared about had shaffed him over however the burning fiery passion of a thousand suns would be a candle next to the amount of hate he would have for that particular individual. Unfortunately for him however he tends to have trouble letting go of the affection he had for them, leading to extremely uncomfortable like/hate conflict that he tries to suppress with extra hate.
If C'tis had a middle name (well, two middle names, because Acerbic-Wherson would certainly be one too) it would be Stubborn. Quitting just isn't something he seems to be capable of once he's set his mind to a task, and while this is positive in that he'll keep trying no matter what it also means that he has a tendency to drive himself into the ground and or attempt things it's really unwise to attempt. Added to his short temper it can be a recipe for disaster but thus far it hasn't got him killed; it's just got him kicked out of his apprenticeship, socially isolated, and on the side of the revolution/resistance equation he disagrees with ideologically. Other than that, no harm done at all.
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Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 10:12 am
And what crafted this creature, you ask; your breath taken away by his mystery and the very deep depths of his soul, which are deep and mysterious like the depths of the deep ocean. Also something about the depths of his deep brown orbs, or possibly hues.
The answer to your question is essentially a very short temper and a penchant for badly thought out major life decisions. The past that made this deep depths mysterious sexily brooding brute is a comedy of errors but with more swearing, violence and bitter recrimination. Pre game history: Like many of Malvren's weyrbrats Carltis has no idea who his parents are but he suspects his father was a rider, or perhaps that's just what he wants to believe. Growing up he was a bright boy, but more notably a temperamental boy. He didn't make friends easily - to say the least - and the more he failed socially the more he pretended not to care about it and pushed people away. He got into fights with kids his own size, picked on kids smaller than him, and - more often than either of these - picked fights with kids bigger than he was. Understandably, this got him labeled as 'trouble', and got him avoided even more by his peers but he insisted didn't care about them because he was going to grow up and Impress a bronze and become weyrleader and then they would all have to do what he said!
That little plan rather fell apart when aged thirteen he found himself with a massive crush on another boy. After a lot of denial he had to accept that no bronze, no brown even would choose him. His reaction to this was to run away; he sought an apprenticeship at Harper Hall, got a lift, and swore he would never look back at stupid dragons who chose like that. He took well to his lessons at the Hall, proving to have a good ear for music and a good hand for art; his voice was average, but he did well with the lap harp and ocarina. He even became slightly less vicious and nasty, managing to form a few tentative friendships and even managing to get a girlfriend when he was fourteen. This was all well and good until two years later when he found out she was cheating on him and got into a fight with the other person she was seeing. The fight ended with Carltis' nose broken, and the other young man's arm broken. Sixteen year old Carltis was unceremoniously booted back to Malvren, where he landed in the midst of of political chaos. Carltis did his best to ignore it, and tried not to panic about the future too much. He could still Impress a silver or something; they were rare and couldn't be Weyrleaders but they could be wingleaders, and that would just have to be good enough.
Remaining isolated from and abrasive towards his peers Carltis spent his free time practicing on the harp he managed to save for, and sparring/fighting with anyone he could talk or provoke into it; by this age he had at least stopped picking on people who just want to be left alone. Unless they insulted him or something of course. Isolated and withdrawn from the world as he was, the first Carltis knew of the revolution was when it kicked off. Despite identifying with the views of the dissenters he ended up with the resistance, mainly because he ran into a weyrbrat he really hated on the revolution side and punched him in the face in front of a lot of people.
Carltis is not famed for his well thought out life decisions.
The revolution and early days at Trine: The next couple of weeks were spent trying to win Malvren back and more to the point trying not to die. Shortly after the death of the Weyrwoman - when it became clear that Malvren could not be saved - he caught a ride out to Trine. He misses his harp, but really likes the whip he acquired during the fighting.
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Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 10:57 am
Yes, my dragon is blue. With my place in life decided I must improve my conduct. Please Faranth, let me learn to serve my betters. Please allow me to bask in their glory. The worthy ones. The gleaming ones. Let me learn to appreciate my place, let me learn to blend my face with the crowds.
It is the good order of the world, is it not? Egg Name: Look Before You Leap Egg
Egg Description: Set off to the side of its siblings this diminutive egg has an eye-catching blood red shell with pretty pattern of stripes and elongated spots in dark grey. When a candidate touches it they discover that this little egg is assessing them and doing so methodically and with a good deal of cynicism for a creature that hasn't even been born yet. It radiates a fierce pride along with the calculating study it makes of candidates, pride enough to fill a rather large bronze. It is not an aggressive egg however, well not unless a candidate feels dismissive of it because of its diminutive size in any case; anyone doing that will feel a sharp stab of anger inside their mind before the dragonet's presence withdraws from them entirely. Other than that it seems slow to make a decision about any candidate, though bright or passionate minds draw a more positive sensation from it than most.
Egg Clutch: Iota Clutch: Hyweth
Dragon Name: Malcarreth
Dragon Size: Tiny/Slim
Personality: Cynical, restrained and proud Malcarreth is a dragon who likes to think before he acts, who thinks quite a lot of the world is a pile of wher-dung, and also thinks that he should be telling you what to do not the other way around. It is easy to annoy him with foolishness, and easy to anger him if you should happen to imply that he is worth less than any other dragon based upon his colour. He is however very much in control of his anger; rather than exploding he simmers quietly and holds back. If somebody crosses him he'll get them back in the end, but if it doesn't make sense to exact his revenge on the spot, he'll wait until it does.
Not all of his holding off and waiting is due to good sense; perhaps half could be attributed to that, and the other half to fits of brooding pessimism. He is, after all, a small blue in a big bronze's world. He knows that no amount of fighting and snarling will allow him to achieve his dreams of leading a wing and that weighs on him, making him bitter and rather prejudiced against dragons of a shiny hue. If he's having a day where he feels life is especially pointless it takes a very firm kick up the tailfork get him to move at all and even then he will make sure his rider knows exactly how pointless he feels everything they're doing is, and will do it sloppily with bad grace. This hesitance does have its advantages however, namely that he doesn't go off half cocked or get himself into trouble in the heat of the moment. He might well get himself into trouble once he's really thought about whether or not to compare that bronze to what came out of his rear this morning but if he does it, it will be a calculated decision that he is prepared to accept the consequences of.
In spite of his rage buttons and cynicism Malcarreth is a reasonably sociable sort of a dragon, so long as you're the 'right' sort of company. He appreciates intelligence in his fellows, along with wit and passion but he can't stand overly sweet dragons, or dim ones, and also has little patience with whers. He's a witty sort himself in a dry, sometimes dark way; he appreciates irony, and is very much an aficionado of and master of the art of deadpan sarcasm.
Another thing that can make Malcarreth difficult for some to get along with is his pride and natural dominance. He really dislikes taking orders and makes no secret of this fact; he has the intelligence, considered nature and attention to detail required to lead and should he find a rider with fiery passion who excels in acting swiftly in the moment he could make a great leader... but he's a blue, so he won't, at least not in the militaristic way he wants to. He loves to sneer at shiny dragons' expense and will happily ignore the fact that he can't hold the ranks he would like and try to give out orders if he thinks his leaders are being stupid.
Finally it is worth knowing that Malcarreth is capable of fanatical loyalty, and is a closest romantic. While he's sociable with the right sort of dragon it takes quite a lot to get into his inner circle, but once you're there this little blue has your back through thick and thin. His view of friendship is almost like his view of romance; he might chase many females but he would probably only ever really love one. In the same manner he has one true best friend from hatching, though he might find one or two more later in life. This first best friend however is Belcarrath; they're quite the odd couple, Malcarreth holding back where Belcarrath charges in but they are both intelligent sorts in the end and balance one another well. Just don't expect him not to face-paw when you get yourself into another fine mess, Bel.
Why Me? Carltis and Malcarreth share intelligence, cynicism and great loyalty to the few people they care about. Carltis is more than capable of giving Malcarreth the kick he needs to get him into action, whereas Malcarreth can get Carltis to look before he leaps and hold him back from doing anything really stupid in the heat of the moment. Well, some of the time anyway.
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Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 11:06 am
I cannot learn my place. Though I have Impressed blue I am not content merely to serve. In my foolishness I desire something more! Perish the thought. I am no teacher though; I can't stand arrogant bratty children, and I suspect that teaching candidates or weyrlings respect by way of my whip, or by giving them tongue-lashings so severe they burst into tears is discouraged.
This leads me to consider what my meagre talents might be, for surely if I had any true worth a larger dragon would have selected me! Such as they are however they lean towards cutting rants, but so far as I am aware there isn't a rank for that. Beyond that I'm rather good at hitting things. There is at least a post for that now; as I cannot have Wingleader, I shall have Warden. Threadfall stats: HP: 41 Agility: +5
Experience log
Lesson: meet the wingleaders! - 0.25 - Spent 08/07/13
Lesson: playing with fingerpaints - 0.25 - Spent 08/07/13
Lesson: Between theory - 0.25
Meta: Gold Diggers - 0.5 - Spent 08/07/13
Benden Rescue - 2.0 - Spent 08/07/13
It never rains, but pours - 1.0
Available EXP: 1.25
Rank requirements log
Events: Gold Diggers, Benden Rescue, In Memoriam
Threadfall: It never rains, but pours
RPs:
RP log
[Candidate]
[META] Awesome back to back fight scene - Carltis meets up with Aleck and the pair decide to work their way down to the infirmary together. Well, Carltis decides and Aleck looks startled. They then promptly get their arses kicked by a small angry woman.
[META] Another shot - Having woken up after their beating, Carltis and Aleck move on to the infirmary and get into a fight with a wherhandler sans wher, and a twelve year old. They win this fight but aren't exactly proud of it.
[META] Evening the odds - Carltis and Aleck arrive just in time to stop Bereck being eaten by a wher.
[META] Last bastion - Other refugees begin to arrive in the infirmary, Carltis takes it upon himself to guard things. For his trouble he gets his face slashed open, throws up and nearly passes out.
Brooding: sulking for men - Carltis and Rochelle hang out and skip rocks. They establish that neither of them is dating Aleck.
[Event] Raise it up - Carltis attends the rather makeshift Gather. He wins the wrestling contest, is smug, and buys a harp.
[Lesson] Lesson: meet the wingleaders! - Candidates and Weyrlings are introduced to the wingleaders.
To the fire pits! - Carltis helps to prepare firestone sacks for the riders during a Fall.
[META] Rebuilding - Carltis goes to a party and somehow ends up fighting a giant tunnelsnake. This was not quite the way he imagined his night going.
[Touching] Iota clutch - Carltis attends the Touching of the Iota clutch.
[Weyrling]
[Hatching] Iota clutch - Carltis Impresses blue Malcarreth, becoming C'tis.
[Event] Iota Feast - C'tis' face hurts from grinning.
Bird song - C'tis finds himself watching Berath and Hyweth fight over who is Malcarreth and Kibeth's mother. Awkward.
My boy builds coffins - In progress
[Hatching] Kappa clutch - C'tis watches the Kappa clutch hatching, and is smug that the only metallic is silver. Suck on that bronzers.
[Lesson] Between work - C'tis (eventually) manages to complete a between training exercise.
[Adult]
Get Down Shorty - In progress
Long Fixed Fable - In progress
Shore talks - In progress
[META] Gold Diggers - C'tis goes along with the group trying to persuade Natai to join Trine. The wherholders have had the same idea and a fight ensues, C'tis does not come out on top of it.
[META] Benden Rescue C'tis and Malcarreth, recovered enough to travel, go to Benden to help with the rescue of prisoners. They escape with Rochelle, Siata and S'dekai.
Two Bottles of Whiskey - In progress
[Threadfall] It Never Rains, but Pours - C'tis and Malcarreth fly their first Fall and come out nearly unscathed.
[ORP] In Memoriam - C'tis attends the gather held in honour of K'tar along with Rochelle and doesn't cause any fights.
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Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 11:12 am
Friends? This brooding mysterious b*****d with a heart blacker than firestone, and colder than a winter in Telgar? Preposterous!... And yet there it is. Funny old world. 
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