twaitor
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- Posted: Thu, 16 Jul 2015 02:57:37 +0000
- ┏━━━━━━━
- ʟᴏᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ⇝ peridot district
- ᴍᴏᴏᴅ⇝ sad / a little happy
- ᴀssᴏᴄɪᴀᴛᴇ⇝ hibiki
- ᴏᴏᴄ ⇝ mehhhh post but tit confirmed for cake lover
- ━━━━━━━┛
TJ was pretty sure that he wanted to die. No, wait. ....No, right, yeah. He wanted to die.
It was one thing walking away from Sal, but it was another thing completely knowing that he'd walked away and never see him again. It wasn't the first time that TJ had told himself that he'd never see Sal again. But those times he didn't mean them for real. He ended up going back to Sal after a day or so because he missed seeing his dumb, cute, face so much. But... but this time, for sure, TJ wouldn't go crawling back. He had lasted this long without crawling back to him. He could... he could.... go the rest of his life without seeing Sal. Y-yeah... that was possible...
The tears wouldn't stop. No matter how many times TJ reached his hands up and rubbed at his eyes, it just wouldn't stop. It wasn't really a surprise, though. That's how it always seemed to be. He had never been much a crier before, but when he does break down into tears, they last for quite a while. And the last few times he's talked to Sal, or ran into him... the tears didn't stop for a long time. TJ just sort of hoped he didn't run into anyone he knew. How would it look for the bartender to run into someone and then they ask him why he's crying? It was true that most people around the Meadows knew of his love for Sal and the way that he had been rejected, but still, there was no way he wanted to admit he was crying because of Sal.
How embarrassing that would be!
Of course... the world just absolutely loved to ******** with TJ.
The redhead lifted his head, only to see someone he knew. Someone who always surprised him with sweets and, in return, he surprised said person with alcohol. "...Is everything alright? Did you seriously just ask me if everything was alright? Does it look like everything is alright?" His voice sounded tense and snappy and he was a little taken aback by it. He needed to calm down. It's not like Hibiki knew what had happened to him. How would he? TJ had only talked about his love for Sal to the man once or twice to him.
After a long pause of TJ running his hands through his hair and rubbing at his eyes again to make the tears stop (to not avail, of course), he finally looked at Hibiki. He hadn't seen him for a few days and it was a little saddening, mostly for the fact that he actually liked being around the man, whether they were sharing drinks/foods or not. Hibiki was just one of those kinds of people that got along with almost anyone and TJ absolutely loved it whenever Hibiki came into the tavern.
TJ shook his head and dropped his face into his hands, "S-sorry, I'm sorry. It's just..." He paused to take a shaky breath, "I... I just recently began to realize that I... I fell for the wrong guy." There was a laugh and TJ dropped his hands from his face, only to raise his head and look at his friend again. The smile on his own face was false and it hurt to even try to smile, "It hurts, y'know? Being in love for someone for so long and then you tell yourself that it's time to let go and you just... You can't stop crying." Another one of those laughs escaped his lips and he bent over a little, his arms wrapping around his stomach in the process. "I just... I feel so defeated, Suzu. It's like... I've just dealt with this love for so long a-and now... and now it's just sort of.... gone. A-and... and I don't know how to deal with it."
"I just sort of want to just forget all about him. But I know that no matter what I do, I won't be able to forget a-and..." TJ's voice trailed off as his eyes filled with tears again. He was seriously starting to get sick of crying. "I-it hurts, Suzu.... Everything hurts."
TJ did everything in his power to hold back the tears and somehow -- somehow -- they didn't fall.
He took many deep breaths, mostly to try to get his breathing under control. He seriously needed to stop. Like honestly, he probably scared Hibiki with all of the useless s**t that just spewed out of his mouth. TJ let out one last shaky breath, before he stood back up straight and looked at his friend. "I'm sorry. F-for all of that. I-I just... I'm sorry." His gaze fell for a moment and he let out a quiet gasp, before he noticed the thing in Hibiki's arms.
"Is that... that's not... it's cake isn't it?"
A small smile tugged at the corners of TJ's lips. If that cake was for him, he'd shove his entire face into it and probably try to drown himself in the frosting so he wouldn't have to think about Sal ever again. But Hibiki didn't need to know that, now did he?
ILOVESAL
we live for each other, or have you forgotten in the middle of the night?
because we can't play it safe or sound anymore, and we don't have a place to go home to.
what, you don't got enough life left to wipe these feelings out?
just like old times, this is the kind of pain I love.
[Zol_the_Grim_Reaper]