Gay|Bi|Trans|Asexual|Pansexual|Intersex|Ally|Queer Support

Hey, a new poll! Would you be willing to help update the (rather lacking) information on the front page?

No thanks - I'm here to learn and I don't think I know enough.	14.2%	[ 23 ]
No thanks - I'm just not interested.	8.6%	[ 14 ]
No thanks - I'm absurdly busy!	13.6%	[ 22 ]
Maybe, depending. I want to ask Gil a few questions first.	25.3%	[ 41 ]
Of course I would! I'll go PM Gil right now.	4.9%	[ 8 ]
I like clicking options on polls	33.3%	[ 54 ]
Total Votes:			[ 162 ]

[OkamisDream]

The Quintessential Geek

OkamisDream

Ok, i'm gender fluid (if thats the right term) and i was curious where can i get a good binder? i'm a 40 F or so, and i wanted to get a good binder.

Hi there, Okamis Dream! I didn't see that anyone else had answered your question so I thought I'd take it upon myself to do just that. Hudson's FTM Resource site has a great page on binding and the many ways to do it along with links to different places online and information about places offline where you can get binders or materials for binding. You can find this page: HERE!

While the information is from a site that focuses on transfolk who are FTM there isn't any reason why you couldn't put the information to use for yourself.

thanks smile

[ChernobylsChild]

I've been lurking this thread, and I just feel like I should share my story.

I was born female, and my legal name is Miranda. Growing up I was always the tomboy, you know. I always played the husband in house, the hero in the spy games, the hunky surfer, etc. Little corny games. I first started to feel attracted to other girls when I was nine. I wasn't attracted to them, really. I just thought they were pretty. I had like tons of boys by then. I wasn't worried about anything. Mostly, my upbringing has been very open. My parents just assume I'm straight, because I date mostly guys. I don't think they've forgotten the girls I've dated, just seemed to regard it as a phase. I'm not really secretive about my sexuality to my friends, but I don't define it. Lately, I've realized this overwhelming fear I have about dating another female. I was bullied, tortured, in sixth grade. People threw stuff at me, put nasty things in my locker, didn't let me in the locker room. I got over it then, didn't hide my girlfriend at the time. I thought these issues were dealt with, but now I'm not so sure. It's a haunting thing.

I'm a boy, sometimes. For months, I'll be content with being female. Then, out of the blue, for a length of time I'll know in my heart that I'm male. It started in eighth grade, I led a double life almost. Girl at home, boy at school and online. It was miserable. Then I started dating exclusively males, became more comfortable with being female, and sex, and everything. It's miserable. I'm happy with being a girl most of the time. But then it'll hit me and I'll just be a guy, and hate my body, and everything. It's confusing. I want to say I'm gender fluid, or androgynous. I haven't reached that point of comfort yet. Because I hate it, you know. It's like I have two people stuck inside me.

For almost a full year, in eighth grade, I went by the name Frank. I dressed like a boy, used male bathrooms everywhere but school. I was happy then, you know. But then I drifted back to being more female, then back again. It's hard because I just don't understand.

Also, I have a medical condition that makes me infertile. I can never have a period, have/carry children, I can't even get pregnant. I've tried to. Because I thought being pregnant would affirm my femaleness. It's crazy to think of these things, or to even talk about it. I try to just ignore it, and I've gotten to the point where I'm scared to tell anyone, and I just want to be "normal."

I'm normal, and I'm beautiful, and I'm happy. I just don't really know where I identify, or what to do, and I apologize for the length of this. Feel free to ask questions, and any advice is appreciated. Thank you.

Edit: I see that I say things are miserable often. I'm comfortable with myself, and the drifting back and forth. I'm not comfortable with hiding it, and not knowing where I identify. Had to clear that up.

[Tala Grey]

Thanks for the comments Karoish and TigerLilyChick~
It was just some food for thought >.<

[Tikikala]

Someone says it is a combination
and someone also added romantically.

now, this is a hard part.
For now, I don't know, not sure, not comfortable with the idea of holding hand of someone of the same gender, or even dating and other things. At the same time, I don't see myself like to spend time with someone of another gender...

I see myself sexually attracted to men, emotionally comfortable and tolerant to women, but at the same time in terms of commitment, neutral to both. (kinda want to be individualistic atm...) I am intellectually attracted to either, bonus if the guy is also attractive/my type. I don't know about romantically. what other adjectives and adverbs I can use to describe attraction? I would have to see how it is.

This is going to be hella complicated if I am to make my own decision, because I like to factor in everything and think in as many angle and points as possible, lol.

[Flickering Hope]

ChernobylsChild

I've been lurking this thread, and I just feel like I should share my story.

I was born female, and my legal name is Miranda. Growing up I was always the tomboy, you know. I always played the husband in house, the hero in the spy games, the hunky surfer, etc. Little corny games. I first started to feel attracted to other girls when I was nine. I wasn't attracted to them, really. I just thought they were pretty. I had like tons of boys by then. I wasn't worried about anything. Mostly, my upbringing has been very open. My parents just assume I'm straight, because I date mostly guys. I don't think they've forgotten the girls I've dated, just seemed to regard it as a phase. I'm not really secretive about my sexuality to my friends, but I don't define it. Lately, I've realized this overwhelming fear I have about dating another female. I was bullied, tortured, in sixth grade. People threw stuff at me, put nasty things in my locker, didn't let me in the locker room. I got over it then, didn't hide my girlfriend at the time. I thought these issues were dealt with, but now I'm not so sure. It's a haunting thing.

I'm a boy, sometimes. For months, I'll be content with being female. Then, out of the blue, for a length of time I'll know in my heart that I'm male. It started in eighth grade, I led a double life almost. Girl at home, boy at school and online. It was miserable. Then I started dating exclusively males, became more comfortable with being female, and sex, and everything. It's miserable. I'm happy with being a girl most of the time. But then it'll hit me and I'll just be a guy, and hate my body, and everything. It's confusing. I want to say I'm gender fluid, or androgynous. I haven't reached that point of comfort yet. Because I hate it, you know. It's like I have two people stuck inside me.

For almost a full year, in eighth grade, I went by the name Frank. I dressed like a boy, used male bathrooms everywhere but school. I was happy then, you know. But then I drifted back to being more female, then back again. It's hard because I just don't understand.

Also, I have a medical condition that makes me infertile. I can never have a period, have/carry children, I can't even get pregnant. I've tried to. Because I thought being pregnant would affirm my femaleness. It's crazy to think of these things, or to even talk about it. I try to just ignore it, and I've gotten to the point where I'm scared to tell anyone, and I just want to be "normal."

I'm normal, and I'm beautiful, and I'm happy. I just don't really know where I identify, or what to do, and I apologize for the length of this. Feel free to ask questions, and any advice is appreciated. Thank you.

Edit: I see that I say things are miserable often. I'm comfortable with myself, and the drifting back and forth. I'm not comfortable with hiding it, and not knowing where I identify. Had to clear that up.

That sounds complicated but I'm sure that there are many people that feel just like you. I remember of having feelings of wanting to be a girl since I was ten. If there were any before then, I can't remember. I remember I also had no idea why I thought this way, I was confused and scared. I fought and repressed the feelings I had of wanting to be a girl and they seemed to go away for awhile but they would keep coming back. I was constantly fighting these feelings but they just kept coming back even stronger. I have now finally admitted to myself that I'm a MtF transsexual because I know that I don't feel like a guy at all.

Now, the way you talked about your experience, it sounds like you still identify as female sometimes so that would not make you a transsexual. With me I was constantly fighting and I had to come up with ways to prove to myself that I was a boy, that I was "normal". There's more than just cisgender and transsexual though. You would probably fit somewhere under the transgender umbrella term. You could possibly be bigender or gender queer, etc. The way you've described your experience makes it seem as though you're not cisgender but I don't think that you're transsexual either. If you want, you can definitely get some help and clarity with your gender in the transtastic thread. We've had many people post there that aren't transsexual but they're not cisgender either. You can also look on the front page of this thread and the front page of transtastic to see if any of the terms fit you. Here's the link for transtastic if you want it.http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/lifestyle-discussion/transtastic-support-for-the-proud-trans-population/t.63473529_16246/

[ChernobylsChild]

Flickering Hope

ChernobylsChild

I've been lurking this thread, and I just feel like I should share my story.

I was born female, and my legal name is Miranda. Growing up I was always the tomboy, you know. I always played the husband in house, the hero in the spy games, the hunky surfer, etc. Little corny games. I first started to feel attracted to other girls when I was nine. I wasn't attracted to them, really. I just thought they were pretty. I had like tons of boys by then. I wasn't worried about anything. Mostly, my upbringing has been very open. My parents just assume I'm straight, because I date mostly guys. I don't think they've forgotten the girls I've dated, just seemed to regard it as a phase. I'm not really secretive about my sexuality to my friends, but I don't define it. Lately, I've realized this overwhelming fear I have about dating another female. I was bullied, tortured, in sixth grade. People threw stuff at me, put nasty things in my locker, didn't let me in the locker room. I got over it then, didn't hide my girlfriend at the time. I thought these issues were dealt with, but now I'm not so sure. It's a haunting thing.

I'm a boy, sometimes. For months, I'll be content with being female. Then, out of the blue, for a length of time I'll know in my heart that I'm male. It started in eighth grade, I led a double life almost. Girl at home, boy at school and online. It was miserable. Then I started dating exclusively males, became more comfortable with being female, and sex, and everything. It's miserable. I'm happy with being a girl most of the time. But then it'll hit me and I'll just be a guy, and hate my body, and everything. It's confusing. I want to say I'm gender fluid, or androgynous. I haven't reached that point of comfort yet. Because I hate it, you know. It's like I have two people stuck inside me.

For almost a full year, in eighth grade, I went by the name Frank. I dressed like a boy, used male bathrooms everywhere but school. I was happy then, you know. But then I drifted back to being more female, then back again. It's hard because I just don't understand.

Also, I have a medical condition that makes me infertile. I can never have a period, have/carry children, I can't even get pregnant. I've tried to. Because I thought being pregnant would affirm my femaleness. It's crazy to think of these things, or to even talk about it. I try to just ignore it, and I've gotten to the point where I'm scared to tell anyone, and I just want to be "normal."

I'm normal, and I'm beautiful, and I'm happy. I just don't really know where I identify, or what to do, and I apologize for the length of this. Feel free to ask questions, and any advice is appreciated. Thank you.

Edit: I see that I say things are miserable often. I'm comfortable with myself, and the drifting back and forth. I'm not comfortable with hiding it, and not knowing where I identify. Had to clear that up.

That sounds complicated but I'm sure that there are many people that feel just like you. I remember of having feelings of wanting to be a girl since I was ten. If there were any before then, I can't remember. I remember I also had no idea why I thought this way, I was confused and scared. I fought and repressed the feelings I had of wanting to be a girl and they seemed to go away for awhile but they would keep coming back. I was constantly fighting these feelings but they just kept coming back even stronger. I have now finally admitted to myself that I'm a MtF transsexual because I know that I don't feel like a guy at all.

Now, the way you talked about your experience, it sounds like you still identify as female sometimes so that would not make you a transsexual. With me I was constantly fighting and I had to come up with ways to prove to myself that I was a boy, that I was "normal". There's more than just cisgender and transsexual though. You would probably fit somewhere under the transgender umbrella term. You could possibly be bigender or gender queer, etc. The way you've described your experience makes it seem as though you're not cisgender but I don't think that you're transsexual either. If you want, you can definitely get some help and clarity with your gender in the transtastic thread. We've had many people post there that aren't transsexual but they're not cisgender either. You can also look on the front page of this thread and the front page of transtastic to see if any of the terms fit you. Here's the link for transtastic if you want it.http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/lifestyle-discussion/transtastic-support-for-the-proud-trans-population/t.63473529_16246/

Thank you so much!

[cereologist]

I haven't posted here in so long ;w;
But since my last derp around here.... I got a girlfriend :3
We'e been dating for about 3 1/2 months.
I'm so happy :3
The only downside is having to hide our relationship from our families.
We've been friends for seven years, and a couple for only a tiny fraction of that time.
I think her parents would be okay with us, but mine would freak our so bad sad
It sucks, but I'm still so glad we're together <3

[Necrose Macelar]

Insanity And Flowers

I haven't posted here in so long ;w;
But since my last derp around here.... I got a girlfriend :3
We'e been dating for about 3 1/2 months.
I'm so happy :3
The only downside is having to hide our relationship from our families.
We've been friends for seven years, and a couple for only a tiny fraction of that time.
I think her parents would be okay with us, but mine would freak our so bad sad
It sucks, but I'm still so glad we're together <3

Hey, congratulations on finding somebody. It sucks having to hide your relationship, but it's better to have somebody by your side than to be crushed by the despair of loneliness.

[Flickering Hope]

Insanity And Flowers

I haven't posted here in so long ;w;
But since my last derp around here.... I got a girlfriend :3
We'e been dating for about 3 1/2 months.
I'm so happy :3
The only downside is having to hide our relationship from our families.
We've been friends for seven years, and a couple for only a tiny fraction of that time.
I think her parents would be okay with us, but mine would freak our so bad sad
It sucks, but I'm still so glad we're together <3

Congratulations on getting a girlfriend. I hope everything works out for you two. It's too bad that you have to hide your relationship though. Hopefully your girlfriend's parents are fine with it like you predict and I hope that your parents take it better than you think they will. Anyway, welcome back to the thread. I don't remember when you last posted but I do remember you.

[-Letat-]

lol met this guy a month ago :]
we've only been dating for a week- but
he reminds me of the old me-
the warm loving, sweet, super happy guy.

glad i found him...well he found me :]
he treats me super nice too. one week at a time
but i hope we continue on.

how are u guys?

[DeathByDyke]

my friend wants to set me on a date with her lil sis
but her sis is like 12 or 13
i never dated sum1 younger than me so idk
shuld i give her a chance or just tell her she's to young for me

[S c h a d 3 n f r e u d e]

Gay Bacon Swagg

my friend wants to set me on a date with her lil sis
but her sis is like 12 or 13
i never dated sum1 younger than me so idk
shuld i give her a chance or just tell her she's to young for me

Depends, how old are you? Don't want to enter into anything illegal, now. If it's not illegal, go for it - why not? Age isn't a defining factor in a person's personality. But also remember that dating a friend's sibling is not always the best idea.

[DeathByDyke]

S c h a d 3 n f r e u d e

Gay Bacon Swagg

my friend wants to set me on a date with her lil sis
but her sis is like 12 or 13
i never dated sum1 younger than me so idk
shuld i give her a chance or just tell her she's to young for me

Depends, how old are you? Don't want to enter into anything illegal, now. If it's not illegal, go for it - why not? Age isn't a defining factor in a person's personality. But also remember that dating a friend's sibling is not always the best idea.[/quote="
im 14 about to be 15 in dec. and im still not sure i guess ill try xP

[Bertholdts]

I've never been in this thread before.
Hello, I'm Oliver. I'm gay.
You all seem very lovely.

[Ravyn457]

Condensed version: I came out as bi in college (08 or 09), and I've been with the same guy since 07. I've never been able to have a relationship with a girl since I'm with a guy. Most of the time I'm ok with that because I love him and I want to be with him forever. Is it wrong to still want to know what it's like to be with a girl?
I'm not going to leave him, curiosity just nags at me sometimes emo