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Do you self harm?

Yes 0.35816719132564 35.8% [ 1024 ]
I used to, but I recovered 0.32668765302553 32.7% [ 934 ]
I don't, but I know someone who does 0.13606155998601 13.6% [ 389 ]
No 0.17908359566282 17.9% [ 512 ]
Total Votes:[ 2859 ]
< 1 2 ... 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 ... 692 693 694 > >> >>> »|

summer1412
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
Silversan, Casey Calvert was the screamer in Hawthorne Heights. He died because of a reaction between the painkillers that he was given, and his antidepressants, that was apparently very, very rare. Casey was a good guy, and is sorely missed.


Absolutely tragic.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. neutral


Oh, not at all. I'd make it very obvious if it was sarcasm. =)

Right. I'm too used to the trolls around here. sweatdrop

Eloquent Conversationalist

questa notte
GoddessDivine
questa notte
Used to self harm, ice and salt was my favorite. I relapse occasionally. I'm really, actually happy now.

People don't really want to hear my story, so I won't waste my time.

Also, the only thing that TWLOHA has done right, imo, is sell shirts for Casey Calvert.
Salt and ice is something that I haven't heard or seen before. Would you mind explaining?

Actually, if you'd be willing, I'd be very intrigued and moved to read your story. So, you're very welcome to post it if you feel comfortable enough to.

You put salt on ice and press it to your skin. Burning sensation, and it can scar if you hold it there long enough. First heard of it on a forum where people were burning themselves some cute-shaped scars.

Exactly five years ago, this chick got me involved with this plot to lie and betray the group that we had, about twenty or so of my peers. I got involved, unknowing of what she was doing. There was this silly story that we made up, and we were just so lonely, all of us, that we just wanted to believe it so bad. It had something to do with an alternate universe, that I don't remember too well now, I believe I repressed the memories. Anyhow, I guess I started losing my mind. I couldn't tell the difference from being awake or asleep, I'd zone out into this AU, and not notice that my body was just robotically getting through each day.

But when we were 'found out' or moreso, I guess, when that chick came clean with everything, the world that we wanted to believe in, for the lack of childhood, almost, was pretty shattered. She and I were outcasted, and for some reason, she hated me. The things we do for attention. I guess I wasn't exactly stable, I don't really have much idea. I'm telling you what I can gather from the things I wrote at the time. From having a bunch of friends, to none, it was a shock, and as far as the rest of the school, they didn't want anything to do with the 'smart class' so it was pretty much lonerdom for me.

Hence the cutting. Hence the 60+ hours a week on the internet. Hence the salt and ice.

And a year and a half later, it wasn't getting any better. Moving to a new school brought friends, but the feeling that they were pity friends didn't help, really. I guess I didn't really stop until I found out that my best friend really did care about me, and we spent so much time together that I couldn't remember that I was sad, that I couldn't remember what had happened before.

Relapses happened, of course. A falling out with the best friend, and a mending of that.
The best friend doesn't have time for me anymore.

I'm happy, now, actually. I don't know where it came from, but for a whole month now, I've been on top of the ******** world. I'm making a game, writing a novel, doing better with music than I ever have before, getting my a** in gear with schoolwork, and you know, the occasional attention from a certain guy, which is always fun times.
Wow... Questa. Thank you so much for putting yourself out there like this. I completely understand how AU can sometimes make more sense than the real world. I spent a lot of my childhood being bullied and reverting into AU worlds. I am so sorry you had to go through all that though.

I really am so proud of you for moving through that part of your life, for figuring out what you had to do to survive and then get better. It's so wonderful that you've hit a bright spot in your life! I hope it goes on for as long as possible. Relapses do happen, but I know your strong enough to get through those too.

Eloquent Conversationalist

questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
Silversan, Casey Calvert was the screamer in Hawthorne Heights. He died because of a reaction between the painkillers that he was given, and his antidepressants, that was apparently very, very rare. Casey was a good guy, and is sorely missed.


Absolutely tragic.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. neutral


Oh, not at all. I'd make it very obvious if it was sarcasm. =)

Right. I'm too used to the trolls around here. sweatdrop
No worries. If i didn't know Sum I would've assumed it too. It's just the phrasing of the words.

Lady Fox

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questa notte
GoddessDivine
questa notte
Used to self harm, ice and salt was my favorite. I relapse occasionally. I'm really, actually happy now.

People don't really want to hear my story, so I won't waste my time.

Also, the only thing that TWLOHA has done right, imo, is sell shirts for Casey Calvert.
Salt and ice is something that I haven't heard or seen before. Would you mind explaining?

Actually, if you'd be willing, I'd be very intrigued and moved to read your story. So, you're very welcome to post it if you feel comfortable enough to.

You put salt on ice and press it to your skin. Burning sensation, and it can scar if you hold it there long enough. First heard of it on a forum where people were burning themselves some cute-shaped scars.

Exactly five years ago, this chick got me involved with this plot to lie and betray the group that we had, about twenty or so of my peers. I got involved, unknowing of what she was doing. There was this silly story that we made up, and we were just so lonely, all of us, that we just wanted to believe it so bad. It had something to do with an alternate universe, that I don't remember too well now, I believe I repressed the memories. Anyhow, I guess I started losing my mind. I couldn't tell the difference from being awake or asleep, I'd zone out into this AU, and not notice that my body was just robotically getting through each day.

But when we were 'found out' or moreso, I guess, when that chick came clean with everything, the world that we wanted to believe in, for the lack of childhood, almost, was pretty shattered. She and I were outcasted, and for some reason, she hated me. The things we do for attention. I guess I wasn't exactly stable, I don't really have much idea. I'm telling you what I can gather from the things I wrote at the time. From having a bunch of friends, to none, it was a shock, and as far as the rest of the school, they didn't want anything to do with the 'smart class' so it was pretty much lonerdom for me.

Hence the cutting. Hence the 60+ hours a week on the internet. Hence the salt and ice.

And a year and a half later, it wasn't getting any better. Moving to a new school brought friends, but the feeling that they were pity friends didn't help, really. I guess I didn't really stop until I found out that my best friend really did care about me, and we spent so much time together that I couldn't remember that I was sad, that I couldn't remember what had happened before.

Relapses happened, of course. A falling out with the best friend, and a mending of that.
The best friend doesn't have time for me anymore.

I'm happy, now, actually. I don't know where it came from, but for a whole month now, I've been on top of the ******** world. I'm making a game, writing a novel, doing better with music than I ever have before, getting my a** in gear with schoolwork, and you know, the occasional attention from a certain guy, which is always fun times.


I want to say that I am proud of you for sharing your story, and happy that you are happy and that you are feeling better. Good luck on making the game, writing the novel, etc. That must be a lot of work.

You went through a lot, and you are strong in my opinion. I know what bullying is like, and I have escaped to dream worlds as well to escape certain events. Or at least try to---daydreams could only protect me for so long.

Maybe one day I'll share my story or at least bits and pieces.

Eloquent Conversationalist

questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
Silversan, Casey Calvert was the screamer in Hawthorne Heights. He died because of a reaction between the painkillers that he was given, and his antidepressants, that was apparently very, very rare. Casey was a good guy, and is sorely missed.


Absolutely tragic.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. neutral


Oh, not at all. I'd make it very obvious if it was sarcasm. =)

Right. I'm too used to the trolls around here. sweatdrop
No worries. If i didn't know Sum I would've assumed it too. It's just the phrasing of the words.
GoddessDivine
Wow... Questa. Thank you so much for putting yourself out there like this. I completely understand how AU can sometimes make more sense than the real world. I spent a lot of my childhood being bullied and reverting into AU worlds. I am so sorry you had to go through all that though.

I really am so proud of you for moving through that part of your life, for figuring out what you had to do to survive and then get better. It's so wonderful that you've hit a bright spot in your life! I hope it goes on for as long as possible. Relapses do happen, but I know your strong enough to get through those too.

People confuse me when they refer to me as questa. Ahaha.
Kae or Kain will suffice. :]

I'm pretty much at peace about what happened. I mean, without it I wouldn't be who I am today, and I'm pretty happy with that, for now. I'm so enjoying what I'm doing, and I'm looking forward to what is to come in later years. I used to be horribly, horribly suicidal, but I've come to realize after all this time, that there's always another option, there's always another way out.

Yeah, my doctors haven't been too good to me lately, putting me on all sorts of meds, and harping on me about food, when I'm recovering from an ED, that he was too ignorant to realize that I was describing. But I've been good, and the side-effects of the med I can OD on are too scary to think about if I were to survive.

Lady Fox

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GoddessDivine
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
Silversan, Casey Calvert was the screamer in Hawthorne Heights. He died because of a reaction between the painkillers that he was given, and his antidepressants, that was apparently very, very rare. Casey was a good guy, and is sorely missed.


Absolutely tragic.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. neutral


Oh, not at all. I'd make it very obvious if it was sarcasm. =)

Right. I'm too used to the trolls around here. sweatdrop
No worries. If i didn't know Sum I would've assumed it too. It's just the phrasing of the words.


True. The internet sometimes makes it hard to tell the tone of voice the poster is using.

I am used to trolls here, especially with topics about self harm.
Silversan


I want to say that I am proud of you for sharing your story, and happy that you are happy and that you are feeling better. Good luck on making the game, writing the novel, etc. That must be a lot of work.

You went through a lot, and you are strong in my opinion. I know what bullying is like, and I have escaped to dream worlds as well to escape certain events. Or at least try to---daydreams could only protect me for so long.

Maybe one day I'll share my story or at least bits and pieces.

It's not so much work as it is doing the things that I love, and I couldn't be happier with my hobbies!

It wasn't so much bullying, really. I mean, I got a few names thrown at me, but nothing outside that. Most of the neglect and abuse was at home, with my mother, who hasn't forgiven me over this event to this day, five years later. Daydreams are powerful, because they're so desirable. However, it's easy to make them lose their power.

It's easier once you've been able to talk about it. That's when you can completely move on.

Cunning Werewolf

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GoddessDivine
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
summer1412
questa notte
Silversan, Casey Calvert was the screamer in Hawthorne Heights. He died because of a reaction between the painkillers that he was given, and his antidepressants, that was apparently very, very rare. Casey was a good guy, and is sorely missed.


Absolutely tragic.

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. neutral


Oh, not at all. I'd make it very obvious if it was sarcasm. =)

Right. I'm too used to the trolls around here. sweatdrop
No worries. If i didn't know Sum I would've assumed it too. It's just the phrasing of the words.


Yeah... I'm good at sarcasm and all, but I usually include a neutral or a rolleyes or a stare just because people get the wrong idea and take me seriously. lol

Original Gaian

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questa notte
GoddessDivine
questa notte
Used to self harm, ice and salt was my favorite. I relapse occasionally. I'm really, actually happy now.

People don't really want to hear my story, so I won't waste my time.

Also, the only thing that TWLOHA has done right, imo, is sell shirts for Casey Calvert.
Salt and ice is something that I haven't heard or seen before. Would you mind explaining?

Actually, if you'd be willing, I'd be very intrigued and moved to read your story. So, you're very welcome to post it if you feel comfortable enough to.

You put salt on ice and press it to your skin. Burning sensation, and it can scar if you hold it there long enough. First heard of it on a forum where people were burning themselves some cute-shaped scars.

Exactly five years ago, this chick got me involved with this plot to lie and betray the group that we had, about twenty or so of my peers. I got involved, unknowing of what she was doing. There was this silly story that we made up, and we were just so lonely, all of us, that we just wanted to believe it so bad. It had something to do with an alternate universe, that I don't remember too well now, I believe I repressed the memories. Anyhow, I guess I started losing my mind. I couldn't tell the difference from being awake or asleep, I'd zone out into this AU, and not notice that my body was just robotically getting through each day.

But when we were 'found out' or moreso, I guess, when that chick came clean with everything, the world that we wanted to believe in, for the lack of childhood, almost, was pretty shattered. She and I were outcasted, and for some reason, she hated me. The things we do for attention. I guess I wasn't exactly stable, I don't really have much idea. I'm telling you what I can gather from the things I wrote at the time. From having a bunch of friends, to none, it was a shock, and as far as the rest of the school, they didn't want anything to do with the 'smart class' so it was pretty much lonerdom for me.

Hence the cutting. Hence the 60+ hours a week on the internet. Hence the salt and ice.

And a year and a half later, it wasn't getting any better. Moving to a new school brought friends, but the feeling that they were pity friends didn't help, really. I guess I didn't really stop until I found out that my best friend really did care about me, and we spent so much time together that I couldn't remember that I was sad, that I couldn't remember what had happened before.

Relapses happened, of course. A falling out with the best friend, and a mending of that.
The best friend doesn't have time for me anymore.

I'm happy, now, actually. I don't know where it came from, but for a whole month now, I've been on top of the ******** world. I'm making a game, writing a novel, doing better with music than I ever have before, getting my a** in gear with schoolwork, and you know, the occasional attention from a certain guy, which is always fun times.


A person I knew tried to encourage me to use salt and ice. I didn't put enough salt on to do any damage, and that was because the guy wanted me to do it before he would tell me what it did. I figured it wasn't good so I mock played along. It was supposed to be a joke. I didn't really find it amusing.

Eloquent Conversationalist

questa notte
GoddessDivine
Wow... Questa. Thank you so much for putting yourself out there like this. I completely understand how AU can sometimes make more sense than the real world. I spent a lot of my childhood being bullied and reverting into AU worlds. I am so sorry you had to go through all that though.

I really am so proud of you for moving through that part of your life, for figuring out what you had to do to survive and then get better. It's so wonderful that you've hit a bright spot in your life! I hope it goes on for as long as possible. Relapses do happen, but I know your strong enough to get through those too.

People confuse me when they refer to me as questa. Ahaha.
Kae or Kain will suffice. :]

I'm pretty much at peace about what happened. I mean, without it I wouldn't be who I am today, and I'm pretty happy with that, for now. I'm so enjoying what I'm doing, and I'm looking forward to what is to come in later years. I used to be horribly, horribly suicidal, but I've come to realize after all this time, that there's always another option, there's always another way out.

Yeah, my doctors haven't been too good to me lately, putting me on all sorts of meds, and harping on me about food, when I'm recovering from an ED, that he was too ignorant to realize that I was describing. But I've been good, and the side-effects of the med I can OD on are too scary to think about if I were to survive.
Sorry Kain, I'll keep that in mind.

I know exactly what you mean. My scars are an affirmation of things that I've worked through and managed to survive. I'm so glad that's a realization that you've come to.

Ugh, some doctors can be so thick. I have to honestly draw word pictures for mine sometimes. I'm so glad that you're recovering so well though. That sounds very scary.
Silversan
Daimin VonRavenstone
Silversan

Thank you for posting.

I agree with the points that you have made. Each self harmer is difference, and they have difference needs. This fact does not stop at recovery. "What may work for one, might not work for another..." That's true. Therapy might work for one self harmer, but the other self harmer might find comfort in journaling their emotions instead as a way to recover. People need to find out what's best for them, and if it works, it works.

People who claim that Depression is not a mental disorder or that it does not exist probably do not know much about it. While there are emotional symptoms, there are also physical symptoms associated with Depression and other mental disorders. I would consider change in sleeping habits to aches and pains as a physical symptom. I'm sure most of us have seen that commercial advertising that one medication that treats the physical AND emotional symptoms of Depression. There's truth to that.

I agree---people who go through mental disorders and traumatic events are strong. They have courage.

Now, if someone is cutting themselves for attention they still have an issue. They still need some form of help. I also don't like how people assume that just because someone self harms that they might be an emo. Emo is just another stereotypes, and stereotypes are usually exaggerated. While they have some basis, that basis has been stretched and torn apart a long time ago. Most people do not fit into stereotypes 100% if at all.

I wish the best for you. Good luck.

You're welcome.

I've known a lot of people in various situations so I see it all the time that what works for me, might not work for someone else.

Saddly, a lot of people who don't personally know someone with depression or who haven't been through it themselves just blow it off to being 'sad'. I was in a discussion with someone one night where he said he knew the difference then in the next paragraph said I was 'better than that and could get over it'. Yeah, okay....lol.

True, they would still have an issue and need help. Just not the kind of help they think they need. Ah I hate that whole emo stereotype. The only reason I mentioned it is because I really don't know what else to call those kids. And true, no one really fits into one stereotype anymore, that's why you have things like punk rocker and goth-a-billy or what not. Everyone should just drop the stupid stereotypes and be themselves. Cold day in hell before that happens though...lol.

Thank you. smile


It is nice to here something say that. A lot of people believe that therapy is the only way someone can stop harming themselves and recover. The same goes for the "just talk to someone" method that people state all the time. I know they mean well, but I think therapy is slightly whored out to a point.

I understand. Emos are stereotypes as the ones who sit in the corner and cut themselves because life is so hard, so bleak, so they bleed black and write morbid poetry. I wish people would realize that stereotypes are fun to imagine, but they are not realistic. People need to be themselves instead of trying to fit into a certain style or group. I saw a lot of my classmates doing that in middle and high school. I had friends leave me simply because I was deemed an outcast or loser by the so-called 'popular kids.'

Stereotypes are probably going to be around until...this world ends.

For the record, I'm guilty of using stereotypes do. I just try not to do it as much. I am well aware that people don't fit them.

When people are misinformed or ignorant about a topic, I will give them links, information, and try to talk to them. If they do not listen, there is not much I can really do.

Ah yes. Whored out is just the right word. So is medication to a point to. I mean, don't get me wrong, I probably wouldn't last a week without my meds but sometimes doctors just throw stuff at people that a diet change can fix just as easily.

*snickers* yeah, those people. I thought it was sad poetry though about their bleak worlds? lol. A lot of people realize it once they get the nice cold dose of the real world. Sometimes they still don't, but most do. Those people aren't true friends then and you were probably better off without them. A lot of 'friends' left my 'group' because the band I was in stopped playing. Ah groupies...lol

And true. We'll have them till we all merge into one kind of person...kind of like that episode of South Park with the people from the future...

Oh me too. I always think it in my head but try not to say it or let that get in the way of talking to them.

I never really have links that handy so yeah. I mean yeah, I have a few bookmarks and what not but by the time I got the internet, I was basically getting over my issues and I knew what they were and what not. I mean yeah, i still looked some things up but never bothered with bookmarking it.

@ the Nietzsche subject: I have a few books on a lot of philosophers I just haven't had the time to read them. Some can also be found in Chapters, you just have to weed through the religion section. What got me into philosophy was the book "Sophie's World", great general overview.

@ Questa Notte: That sounds really rough, and being happy now is what counts. Never tried the ice/salt thing. Sounds nasty though...

@ the rant thing a bit back (I just rememberd it...lol): Eh, everyone has varying opinons on size of rants. But most do have some bit of strong emotion attached to it. I usually don't go off on a tangent and it's rare I'll get annoyed on here (not that I was when I wrote my OP)...I lost where I was going with this...lol.

Anyway, I'm going to bed now. If I try to stay up any more, I'll be up the rest of the night and won't sleep a wink. I have subscribed though so I might be around tomorrow night or what not.

EDIT: Because I saw someone mention not being able to tell sarcasm from not. I use:
<sarcasm>*insert remark*</sarcasm> Works well. wink
spiffyschmoo

A person I knew tried to encourage me to use salt and ice. I didn't put enough salt on to do any damage, and that was because the guy wanted me to do it before he would tell me what it did. I figured it wasn't good so I mock played along. It was supposed to be a joke. I didn't really find it amusing.

From all the self harm I've done, the only thing that's left a scar to this day is the salt and ice.
I heal up really well.

Lady Fox

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questa notte
Silversan


I want to say that I am proud of you for sharing your story, and happy that you are happy and that you are feeling better. Good luck on making the game, writing the novel, etc. That must be a lot of work.

You went through a lot, and you are strong in my opinion. I know what bullying is like, and I have escaped to dream worlds as well to escape certain events. Or at least try to---daydreams could only protect me for so long.

Maybe one day I'll share my story or at least bits and pieces.

It's not so much work as it is doing the things that I love, and I couldn't be happier with my hobbies!

It wasn't so much bullying, really. I mean, I got a few names thrown at me, but nothing outside that. Most of the neglect and abuse was at home, with my mother, who hasn't forgiven me over this event to this day, five years later. Daydreams are powerful, because they're so desirable. However, it's easy to make them lose their power.

It's easier once you've been able to talk about it. That's when you can completely move on.


There's a lot I don't know about myself, parts of my childhood up until middle school that are completely missing from me. It is one of the reasons why I am hesitant to talk about my past besides a few stories every know and then. I also have a problem sitting down, and writing something without getting distracted. It's something I need to work on sooner or later.

True. I daydream still, but not as much as I did in middle and high school. I don't even know how I passed my last two years of high school and get honor roll at the same time. I was not paying attention, I was distracted by my problems and dreams.

I would still consider that bullying. Abuse is not a good thing to go through. I would not even wish it even on my worst enemies as cliche as that sounds. But it is true.

Cunning Werewolf

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Salt and ice isn't that much of a thrill for me. Besides, it takes too much effort and usually when I self harm it's in a nervous, frantic state. So there's no time for planning out how I'm going to do it, I just do it.

And also, Questa, thank you so much for sharing, sweetheart. You're brave to post your story like that.

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