Meet the staff
███ Name: Pesty
███ Pesty, one of Santa's elves in a supervisory position, responsible for a team of two. It's a full time job handling the misfit elves atop of getting presents made, inventoried and sent out. Somehow she manages though. It's never a dull day with her team, though, a dull day might be welcomed when trying to pull Horace from the bar. Or trying to stop Nidorous from putting questionable objects, people and pets in his mouth.
She believes in hard work and perseverance, with an excessive amount of coffee to help her get through the day. To say she is hard working would be an understatement, but in order to reach her ultimate goal of 'Best of Santa's division', hard work and maintaining her crew are all a part of that task.
Likes: Giving Gifts, Paying it forward, Animals, Any coffee-based beverage and Greek yogurt.
███ Name: Nidorous
███ Nidorous, a former elf employed by Santa who met with an untimely demise when Santa was gifted a new MP3 player for the holidays and failed to assist the elf in distress.
The distressed elf was lounging on the pile of toys in the back and when Santa took off, the elf was blown off the back of the sleigh after shouting many unpleasant words in the man's general direction and clinging for life.
Ended up crashing through a barn roof and was planted in a heaping soft warm pile, that belonged to the rather large cow that was spooked by his entrance and was promptly trampled.
After being buried later near some nuclear waste, the elf is back in business, only this time out for revenge on the 'Fat Man', working under Pesty's direction. ( More or less. )
Facts: Will eat nearly anything that catches his eye. Has a tendency to lick, chew and drool on things. Small animals, children and even fellow elves have all suffered either minor or grievous injuries in various incidents due to new compulsions. Your drink is not safe around this elf.
The maggots in his brain help keep it functioning to some degree, though is constantly attempting to pick them out and flick them at people.
Has a loathing of toy trains, dolls, doll houses and reindeer.
The only known distractions seem to be offerings of cheesecake and eggnog.
Warning: Do not engage if happened upon. Back away slowly and quietly. Should you be face to face with the creature, the best course of action is to sacrifice a small child if there is no cheesecake or eggnog present.
███ Name: Horace
███ What makes Horace tick is beer. He's that guy who's always at the end of the bar, always with a beer in front of him, always somewhat relaxed, but never falling down drunk. That would be disrespectful to the beer.
He's fundamentally lazy, but when the time comes for the rubber to meet the road, he's there. He'll be back in the bar again as soon as possible afterwards, but he does what he has to do.
He's just not convinced he has to do as much as everyone else thinks he does.
Likes: Beer.
Dislikes: Work. Not enough beer.