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It is a rare & quizzical experience
for the quintessential urbanite
to find themselves in alleviation
amidst the benign ambience of
cricket-chirps.
And yet, it it stranger still to catch
that selfsame hipster formulating prose
whilst pissing in an insect-ridden
urinal.
- by Toastbusters |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 07/16/2008 |
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- Title: The Noise Comes Flooding In
- Artist: Toastbusters
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Description:
Perhaps this is one of my favourite pieces - but it's not.
This will likely be fed into a larger work at some point, but let's see a slice before we have the cake. - Date: 07/16/2008
- Tags: peeing crickets nature nurture piss
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Comments (7 Comments)
- Toastbusters - 07/17/2008
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Aw thanks, peeps.
As for making everything microcostic, I think the best way to do that might be to go into more depth on the state of the urinal.
Get right down into it - right into the material, the water, the smell, the feeling. And then metabolize each insect - create a little world right in the ol' standin' toilet. - Report As Spam
- Mokoni - 07/17/2008
- I'm curious to see what you would add to it, because on its own it sounds like it will become a deeper proverb of the English language.
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- Casca 7 - 07/16/2008
- absolutely hilarious!!! <3
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- Astaire - 07/16/2008
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I think the almost pretentious word-choice really does give a lot of depth to the piece, and I agree with CrystalMoon... It's quite a contrast to the subject matter.
It would be interesting if you made it a larger work, especially if you were able to use a hipster pissing in an insect-ridden urinal as a microcosm for some larger issue. - Report As Spam
- OoOCrystalMoonOoO - 07/16/2008
- Its very amusing to see how many words of such large grandeur go into a poem about you peeing in a urinal....maybe thats the best part about it is that its just hilarius to try to read out loud. XD
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- Toastbusters - 07/16/2008
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I am nothing without the sartorial splendor of sequipedalianism.
(Believe it or not, I was peeing indoors! We filled the school with crickets! YEAH ******** YOU ANARCHY OR WHATEVER!) - Report As Spam
- omgChe - 07/16/2008
- Heh, it was definitely amusing, and I was absorbed in the act of an outdoor urination. However, I think you could get more impact out of being less grandiloquent. I enjoyed it. Cheers.
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