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 Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:26 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:28 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:49 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:52 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:53 pm
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Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2016 8:25 am
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Posted: Fri Dec 23, 2016 11:59 am
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Posted: Fri Dec 23, 2016 12:38 pm
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Quote: Alassiel finally wants another child, but after trying for many years she is deemed sterile and unable to have children. She struggles with the idea of adoption, something her husband isn't opposed to, but comes to terms with it and puts her faith into the gods that a child will be given to the when the time is right.
Alassiel waited patiently seated next to her husband, she’d just finished getting checked by the doctor back home and was waiting to hear her thoughts. They’d been trying to have another child for almost two years now, after a year of trying they’d sought out ways to help their fertility. Now, almost a year later and still no child Alassiel worried. She worried she had gone barren. Still, they tried and tried and would not stop until they were told a final verdict. She felt she was ready for another child so why didn’t the Gods gift her with another?
The doctor woman stepped out of the hut, face grim.
“I am so sorry, I do believe I cannot offer you anything else that could help your fertility. Perhaps the gods do not mean for you to have another child. I am sorry.” The woman bowed a bit, hesitated as if to wait and see how the news would sink in before she turned and entered the hut again.
Z’ran gently gathered Alassiel into his arms and rubbed her back. The Shifter quivered, let out a choked noise before burying her head into Z’rans shoulder. She wanted to cry so bad. But they were still in public and she did not want to do it in front of the others.
“Shhh, it’s okay.” Z’ran kissed the top of her head and Alassiel only gripped him harder. He too needed to keep it together if only for Alassiel sake. “Let’s go home; Ziel won’t come back for a little while.”
Alassiel complied and didn’t fuss when he helped her move. She was in complete shock. She didn’t know how to react to the news; she didn’t know what to do anymore. She had thought she’d be able to at least have another…
The house was quiet without Ziel and Alassiel was thankful for it. Z’ran moved her to their bedroom and sat her down before he too took a seat and hugged her. Heavy thick sobs broke the silence of the home as Alassiel released her feelings. Sure she might not always have wanted to have children, but one more. She was just asking for one more. It wasn’t much to ask for was it? But apparently it was and Alassiel was left feeling empty, dry, and dead inside. It was like her whole life had come crumbling down in one instant.
She didn’t know how long it was before finally Alassiel quieted down, the tears would not come anymore. She had nothing left. The Shifter sighed, Z’ran released her and she wiped his tears away.
“It’s okay,” she said softly, voice cracking. Her throat was dry. “We have Ziel and she’s rowdy enough for two.” But even as Alassiel said the words, she did not feel them.
“I know,” Z’ran grasped her hand by the wrist and used the hand to cup his face. “We can always adopt you know. If we really, truly want another child.”
“It’s not the same.” Alassiel vehemently. It was a lot harsher than she’d meant but it was simply not the same. It would not truly be her child. It wouldn’t even truly be Z’ran child either. How could she accept such a thing? No, the idea angered her and she wanted nothing to do with it.
The door to their home opened, Ziel made herself heard and Z’ran got up.
“We’ll figure something out.” He said softly before bending down and giving her a kiss on the forehead and going out to greet their daughter. Alassiel watched him go and felt tears coming again.
No she had to put her game face on now, Ziel was home and she did not want her to start asking questions. Alassiel waited a bit, fixed herself up before going out and trying to enjoy the rest of the evening with her family. She couldn’t dwell on this forever now could she? Could she… Alassiel cleared her mind and went out to see her daughter, grabbing her up into a hug that was rejected before getting their dinner ready. She wanted to keep her mind busy as to not think of the other thing that she would not name.
By the time night had come and Ziel was in bed, Z’ran grabbed her hand and dragged her out of the house to sit by the ocean under the stars.
“The Gods are not foul creatures,” Alassiel said miserbly.
“Alassiel, the Gods can also hear you calling them foul creatures.” He chuckled. “Why do you not want to adopt a child?”
“It wouldn’t be our blood,” she said bitterly.
“Any child we take into our home would be our blood.”
“It’s not the same Z’ran. We would have to decide. Do we adopt a Matori or a Shifter child? We cannot have both; we cannot have a child that is half of us.” Alassiel sighed frustrated.
“Why would we be restricted to Matori or Shifter? Why not an Ice tribe child? Or Oban? Or Wind? What stops us from adopting a child from another tribe?” Alassiel made an unpleasant noise and Z’ran chuckled. “We are all children of Tendaji Alassiel, we should not reject those who have lost their families because of blood.”
He was right and he knew it and Alassiel knew it she just didn’t want to admit it. “I just want a child that is half of you and half of me.” Was it an unreasonable request?
“You already have Ziel, perhaps the gods want you to take care of a less fortunate child.” Alassiel sighed, he was right. This whole blood thing felt silly the more he spoke. There were plenty of children who did not have parents.
“That gods have an interesting way of showing me that.” Alassiel grabbed a rock and threw it into the ocean. “I will think on it,” She wanted another child, there was nothing stopping her but herself. Alassiel took a deep breath. If she were honest, she would want another daughter of Matori heritage. Perhaps the gods would throw such a child at her, she would wait and see.
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Posted: Thu May 25, 2017 1:02 am
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Gleaming Hide
Alassiel regarded the night sky, she felt partially tired. She was in her mid thirties now, but even at such an age she still felt like she had not accomplished anything great in her lifetime. Granted it seemed like her only child seemed to be a miracle and perhaps could count as an accomplishment since she had been deemed sterile by the doctors. Ziel was her pride and joy after all, nothing and no one could replace her now twenty something year old daughter. Alassiel knew she still needed to do something great, something out of her ordinary life on Tendaji.
That was the moment she decided to let Ziel do her own thing and move out on her own. It was maybe seen as a small or normal step for other parents, a rite of passage for anyone else, but for Alassiel it was this horrible thing she did not want to feel. Ally had never said it aloud and no one had ever made the comment, but it was clear that Ziel was not exactly as she seemed. She was different somehow with her short attention span and her more than often not odd ideas. No one said anything and Ally did not acknowledge it, but it was there and the Shifter had worried all her life as to what would happen to her daughter.
Alassiel had begun to worry even more when Ziel had chosen the path of shaman. Where would it bring her? What kind of dangers would she face or put herself into? And now on top of it all she wanted to move out? Her daughter whom she had protected all her life wanted to move out of her safe zone?! Unacceptable and Alassiel had held onto her daughter with an iron grip at first. But Ziel was Ziel and Alassiel saw how much she wanted to be out with the others. To be her own independent women. Z’ran had had to convince her but in the end, Alassiel had let her go.
Not too far, but still.
That was perhaps why now Alassiel found herself restless and sleepless at night. The knowledge that Ziel was not under her roof, not under her protection was a scary thought. The only solace Ally had was that slowly her sleep returned to her, it took an excruciating amount of time but, she found sleep again and Alassiel was over her motherly crisis.
Which was why when Z’ran proposed they check out the new continent, Alassiel jumped on the occasion. Ziel wanted to go too so hey it was like hitting two birds with one stone. So, Alassiel and Z’ran spent a week cleaning up their home and closing it up for the months they would be away. Alassiel prepared for maybe a year or two, but Z’ran was sure they wouldd be home before then. Perhaps they’d leave whenever Ziel wanted to but Alassiel felt like she was sheltering her daughter a little too much nowadays. Was she not supposed to be giving her space?
The journey to Belrea had not exactly been the easiest, but it certainly had made for an interesting one. Alassiel had had to calm Ziel down after the captain had threatened to throw her overboard. She had been like an oversized excited child and was causing a ruckus. Once they had landed in Zenner, Ziel had bounced off so quickly Alassiel had not even had time to say goodbye. And that was okay, she had to remind herself. Ziel would come back when she wanted, Alassiel could get over her separation anxiety if she gave herself a chance.
Zenner was almost like being home, if the trees were replaced with tall buildings of course. Alassiel did not see herself living here, it was all just too.... Well, she did not really have a word for it. It just did not feel alive to her. There was something missing and the more Alassiel moved through the city the more she knew what it was. It lacked nature. It lacked all the natural things that a forest brought. Perhaps it was the shifter within her speaking since she had been raised in the the trees after all, but Zenner felt dead inside to her.
Thankfully they did not spend much time in Zenner, Hafelle was more Z’ran’s style since he was a merchant and was looking for items to bring back home. Possibly eve have some trade routes for commerce back home. Alassiel actually saw Ziel once in awhile but she was off just as quickly as she had appeared. If she checked in every once in awhile, Alassiel felt like she was going to be okay. Ally did not involve herself too much into her husband's work but they decided to go down to the further most city for a visit while the trade’s people thought on the deals Z’ran had made.
Talrise was a little more their style with all the water and such. Z’ran thought they could stay a little while there until he had settled his trade agreements. There was a lot of logistics to be figured out but the Geians and Lightening earthlings he was dealing with seemed to enjoy that kind of thing. Alassiel had lots of time by herself to explore and answer some of the questions the locals had for her. Rygha had come with her after all and they all seemed to have questions about her snaptrotter. She did not mind questions but Rygha did not like all the attention he was receiving.
“Can I pet him?” A little lightening girl said who had approached.
“Sure,” Alassiel whistled to the sun bathing snaptrotter who slowly opened an eye to look at her and then lifted his head up when the little girl ran over to him arms outstretched.
Alassiel watched the exchange with a smile on her face, she wished she could have another child. She sighed softly and moved the thought along, she was on vacation no time to dwell on the past. Rygha let the little girl ride him for a bit before her parents came to get her.
When Alassiel returned home that night, she took Z’ran into her arms and kissed him deeply. He smiled back at her as he embraced her and they stood there grinning at each other. She could see the wrinkles at the corner of his eyes but he was still as beautiful as the first time she had seen him. The Shifter leaned in again to connect their lips, the kiss was longer, deeper and Z’ran tugged her along their accommodation. It did not take much to get them going, they still had a fire within them burning bright.
It rained the next morning, Z’ran had left early and left Alassiel by herself to do nothing. Ryga started at his rider from under the little makeshift roof they had made for him. She stuck out her tongue at him before pushing herself off the window sill. She glanced around the place and decided that cleaning was the most effective use of her time. Their place was small enough but the bed still needed to be made and their dishes needed to be cleaned, items arranged...
The vacation was doing Alassiel some good, so after almost two years of traveling around Belrea fishing for merchants with her husband, both of them knew it was time to return. They had not seen Ziel in a little while but did not look for her. If she wished to stay on Belrea then it was her choice. Alassiel was a lot more confident in her daughter's capabilities then they had been previously. So when the couple got back on the flying machines, they looked forward to returning to their real home.
The journey back home had been swift once they had landed back in Tendaji. They began by visiting Alassiel’s shifter family for a bit who were happy to hear from them after so long. Then they traveled back down to their home for Z’ran’s matori family. Being back in Matori felt great, Alassiel felt refreshed and Rygha felt at home in the waters. The shifter still felt like she wanted to do something with herself, leave another mark upon the world. So Alassiel had an idea. She decided to open a riders academy specifically for those who had snaptrotters. It was not much and she certainly had no knowledge in this type of thing.
The academy was called Gleaming Hide. The shifter had had no idea what to call it but one of her students had decided upon that name after seeing Ryga’s hide. The academy did not start big it was quite the makeshift thing, but Alassiel had two student with baby snaptrotters and it looked like a decent start to her. Vandros and Illidander were great students, though a bit competitive. Alassiel regarded them with a smile, they were kind of like her kids now too right?
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Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 5:36 am
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Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 5:44 am
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Posted: Fri Jun 23, 2017 9:30 am
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Posted: Sun Aug 20, 2017 6:50 am
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Posted: Sun Aug 20, 2017 6:50 am
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Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 7:29 am
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