Transtastic ||Support for the proud Trans Population||

Remy is back again....

Please don't kill me. D:	13.8%	[ 185 ]
I'll be nice, I promise.	23.2%	[ 310 ]
I'm back for now, we're all good right?	14.2%	[ 190 ]
Wait... What are you doing with that knife?	48.8%	[ 652 ]
Total Votes:			[ 1337 ]

[Desideraht]

Oblivion Blades

Heading for one hell of a depression low again and I'm sort of too tired to even bother typing it out anymore. I don't even know why I'm telling you this, I guess this is some sort of an extremely tired and just as pointless call for help. At this stage I'm considering popping my lithiums because I can't get on any more accurate meds and at least lithium would kill my feelings, but I'm still not dead enough to not care about the whole vomiting business that follows taking those.

For some reason, I did not see this. I have nothing profound to say; only that this too shall pass.

[Desideraht]

Just found out tonight that my surgery might cost a lot less than 9 grand. I can't do it any time this week except maybe on friday but I'm going to gather the courage to call the office and get an actual quote.

[Desideraht]

THIS THREAD
IS DEAD

I guess I'll just post another random transition-related pic.



I can proudly say this is my weak arm, and that I don't work out. Any muscle gains I have are from my job and testosterone. Needless to say, I'm looking forward to actually toning it when I have a REAL schedule so I can actually work out daily. 4laugh I am twisting my arm back in this photo 'cos otherwise I was blocking it with a shadow. xp

Also I hate Tumblr.
Anyone else on there?
Linx plz.
Here's mine <3

http://dansen.tumblr.com/

[Umbral_Necropolitan]

Desideraht

THIS THREAD
IS DEAD

I guess I'll just post another random transition-related pic.



I can proudly say this is my weak arm, and that I don't work out. Any muscle gains I have are from my job and testosterone. Needless to say, I'm looking forward to actually toning it when I have a REAL schedule so I can actually work out daily. 4laugh I am twisting my arm back in this photo 'cos otherwise I was blocking it with a shadow. xp

Also I hate Tumblr.
Anyone else on there?
Linx plz.
Here's mine <3

http://dansen.tumblr.com/

I'm not even sure what tumblr is used for.

Nice bicep, I wish my arms weren't as muscular as they are but I need the strength for work. I need to work on my core and legs more. I miss my super nice abs that my weight training class was giving me.

[Desideraht]

Umbral_Necropolitan

Desideraht

THIS THREAD
IS DEAD

I guess I'll just post another random transition-related pic.



I can proudly say this is my weak arm, and that I don't work out. Any muscle gains I have are from my job and testosterone. Needless to say, I'm looking forward to actually toning it when I have a REAL schedule so I can actually work out daily. 4laugh I am twisting my arm back in this photo 'cos otherwise I was blocking it with a shadow. xp

Also I hate Tumblr.
Anyone else on there?
Linx plz.
Here's mine <3

http://dansen.tumblr.com/

I'm not even sure what tumblr is used for.

Nice bicep, I wish my arms weren't as muscular as they are but I need the strength for work. I need to work on my core and legs more. I miss my super nice abs that my weight training class was giving me.

Me neither. I think it's just for sharing s**t you like basically. At least that's what I'm doing with it.

Thank you. <3 I'm really happy with my arms, though I want to work on them a bit more. I'm also going to start working on my abs/chest and see if I can get my chest mostly gone. I posted this before but no one noticed it: [[shirtless pic (link removed)] I really think a little working out could tighten my chest up enough that I will have a lot less dysphoria. I will still need surgery no matter what, though... Puffy nipples and all that. Plus working out won't eradicate the breast tissue. It'll just tighten things up.

EDIT: For stomach muscles I recommend yoga. But you have to focus on core poses, of course. It really works. I'm actually going to yoga at the LGBT center in the morning. Namaste!

Also I though this was funny and worth sharing with the thread:

Desideraht

Flynn of the Skies

Desiderhat has said the word trans a whopping 684 times.

That's shocking low. I'm afraid I will have to remedy that.

And to be fair, I've said [********] 987 times,
s**t 929 times,
and sex 812 times.

CAN I GET A WHAT WHAT

rofl

[Umbral_Necropolitan]

Desideraht

Your boobs are smaller than mine and I have tiny boobs. I am envious of your n****e color, hormones made my nips slightly darker in color, I miss them being pink. When I was in a weight lifting class my chest became flatter which made me sad since my tatter tots were already small. I blame loss of body fat for it happening.

I had a whole regimen for core muscles, just making myself do them without someone telling me to is tough since I hate doing them.

I looked up how many times I've cursed or cussed, I was surprised it was so low since I can be very vulgar in real life using profanity and pejorative terms quite often when I'm upset.

[Desideraht]

Umbral_Necropolitan

Desideraht

Your boobs are smaller than mine and I have tiny boobs. I am envious of your n****e color, hormones made my nips slightly darker in color, I miss them being pink. When I was in a weight lifting class my chest became flatter which made me sad since my tatter tots were already small. I blame loss of body fat for it happening.

I had a whole regimen for core muscles, just making myself do them without someone telling me to is tough since I hate doing them.

I looked up how many times I've cursed or cussed, I was surprised it was so low since I can be very vulgar in real life using profanity and pejorative terms quite often when I'm upset.

Well, that IS with my arms up too, though. When they're down... well, I get moobs. I won't show that, though. It utterly embarrasses me, lol...
I like my nipples. Aside from the puffiness, I think they're perfect in shape and color. whee

What kind of exercises were you doing that flattened out your chest? I will be sure to consider it in my own workout plan, lol.

I'm both vulgar online and on here. I'd say I talk about trans stuff A LOT more online than in person, though. IRL I talk about much more general stuff. I tend to talk to people about what the like to do and s**t and try to get to know them rather than talk all about myself.

Btw thanks for not quoting it, I think I'll go remove the link just to be safe, lol.

[Umbral_Necropolitan]

Desideraht

Umbral_Necropolitan

Desideraht

Your boobs are smaller than mine and I have tiny boobs. I am envious of your n****e color, hormones made my nips slightly darker in color, I miss them being pink. When I was in a weight lifting class my chest became flatter which made me sad since my tatter tots were already small. I blame loss of body fat for it happening.

I had a whole regimen for core muscles, just making myself do them without someone telling me to is tough since I hate doing them.

I looked up how many times I've cursed or cussed, I was surprised it was so low since I can be very vulgar in real life using profanity and pejorative terms quite often when I'm upset.

Well, that IS with my arms up too, though. When they're down... well, I get moobs. I won't show that, though. It utterly embarrasses me, lol...
I like my nipples. Aside from the puffiness, I think they're perfect in shape and color. whee

What kind of exercises were you doing that flattened out your chest? I will be sure to consider it in my own workout plan, lol.

I'm both vulgar online and on here. I'd say I talk about trans stuff A LOT more online than in person, though. IRL I talk about much more general stuff. I tend to talk to people about what the like to do and s**t and try to get to know them rather than talk all about myself.

Btw thanks for not quoting it, I think I'll go remove the link just to be safe, lol.

I like puffy nips, good for sucking on... I think I would weird guys out with what I like to do.

My upper body exercises included bench press, tricep extensions, curls, and one more that I don't remember the name of... hard to describe, used the muscles on the opposite side of what curls use.

For lower body I was doing alternating lunges with about 40lbs in my hands, leg extensions, leg press, and squats.

I have anger issues, I usually just take out my frustrations with a impressive verbal display of vulgarity and such.

Yeah I figured you'd prefer to control when that link goes down and such.

Sorry about the slow reply, had to pick up my gf since someone t-boned her car earlier and I just found out about it and went got her with the help of my mother since I'm medicated and unable to drive.

[Desideraht]

Umbral_Necropolitan

I like puffy nips, good for sucking on... I think I would weird guys out with what I like to do.

My upper body exercises included bench press, tricep extensions, curls, and one more that I don't remember the name of... hard to describe, used the muscles on the opposite side of what curls use.

For lower body I was doing alternating lunges with about 40lbs in my hands, leg extensions, leg press, and squats.

I have anger issues, I usually just take out my frustrations with a impressive verbal display of vulgarity and such.

Yeah I figured you'd prefer to control when that link goes down and such.

Sorry about the slow reply, had to pick up my gf since someone t-boned her car earlier and I just found out about it and went got her with the help of my mother since I'm medicated and unable to drive.

Lol trust me, my man likes the nips too, but I'm self-conscious about it. I don't want it to look weird under my shirt or when my shirt is off... so yeah, I want it reduced at least some. I don't mind a LITTLE bit but right now they're pretty puffy. And I know some people find that sexy but it's mildly dysphoric for me. Though the actual "breast" part bugs me a lot more than my nipples do.

Thanks for that info. That's all I need. xd Basically the same sorts of exercises I'm already planning on using, plus core exercises.

Haha, my anger issues tend to just make me brood. I don't usually attack people in person or anything. I snap at them a little and then they LOSE IT. People have really short tempers... I'm not the only one, lol.

I appreciate you being courteous about the link. That really means a lot.

Wow, is she alright? Don't worry about it, I'm supposed to be asleep right now anyway LOL. I kept myself entertained. xd

[Desideraht]

I cancelled yoga because I am having my last or second to last period. And the last few are the worst, at least in my experience. The cramps get REALLY bad. This happened last time I was on a full dose on T. I had like 2 or 3 really bad periods and then they actually stopped. u.u; And I thought I wasn't going to have one because it's actually like a week late (another sign that they're stopping).

It explains partially why I've been on edge lately, though. People supposedly get "bitchy" when they're menstruating. For me, I just get panicky and it makes me react to s**t. Not necessarily bitchy, but in various extreme ways.

[Joy in Mudville]

Desideraht

I cancelled yoga because I am having my last or second to last period. And the last few are the worst, at least in my experience. The cramps get REALLY bad. This happened last time I was on a full dose on T. I had like 2 or 3 really bad periods and then they actually stopped. u.u; And I thought I wasn't going to have one because it's actually like a week late (another sign that they're stopping).

It explains partially why I've been on edge lately, though. People supposedly get "bitchy" when they're menstruating. For me, I just get panicky and it makes me react to s**t. Not necessarily bitchy, but in various extreme ways.

I wish I could know when my last period is going to be. I thought that this last month would be the magic one, but NOPE. Although it was late as hell. Just, six months on, stop nao plz.

Anyway, hang in there!

Also; hello!

[Vardoger]

Went to the VA Hospital this morning for a special appointment. I walk up to the window and the conversation is thus:

Them: How can I help you sir?
Me: (talks about appointment)
Them: What's your name?
Me: Uh... (female name)
Them: Oh, I'm sorry.
Me: Why?
Them: For calling you 'sir'.
Me: No, it's fine.
Them: No it isn't.
Me: Yes, trust me, it's fine.
Them: No, it's not okay that I called you sir.
Me: (leans in, lowering voice) It IS fine, because I'm in the process... Of becoming....
Them: (completely normally) Oh, ok. (continues on with appointment) So you should be all squared away, then!


Totally started off my day awesome, there. It was just so normal. Nothing weird happened. He was totally lassie faire about the whole thing, because it didn't matter. And it doesn't. ^_^


...But then some b***h at the diner was ageist and I got super pissed so my day ended up being crap again anyway. But that's not trans-related, so I'll lay off it...

[Desideraht]

I am seriously getting desperate to get out of my debt and start saving surgery funds. So I'm trying to think of ways to make money ASAP. And really, I'm very stuck. As long as my name is this stupid female name, I'm ********. It really needs to change ASAP. But I can't file today. It has to wait until at least Friday. MAYBE tomorrow. I need to get the forms re-done. I'm so overwhelmed and terrified of another rejection.

I just don't want to clerks to judge me again. I don't want their personal feelings to come between me and my personal success. I'm afraid they'll see my chosen name and act stupid. It's none of their damn business. I really need this to just get through this time.

[Umbral_Necropolitan]

Desideraht

Lol trust me, my man likes the nips too, but I'm self-conscious about it. I don't want it to look weird under my shirt or when my shirt is off... so yeah, I want it reduced at least some. I don't mind a LITTLE bit but right now they're pretty puffy. And I know some people find that sexy but it's mildly dysphoric for me. Though the actual "breast" part bugs me a lot more than my nipples do.

Thanks for that info. That's all I need. xd Basically the same sorts of exercises I'm already planning on using, plus core exercises.

Haha, my anger issues tend to just make me brood. I don't usually attack people in person or anything. I snap at them a little and then they LOSE IT. People have really short tempers... I'm not the only one, lol.

I appreciate you being courteous about the link. That really means a lot.

Wow, is she alright? Don't worry about it, I'm supposed to be asleep right now anyway LOL. I kept myself entertained. xd

You gotta do what you need to do to feel comfortable when it comes to dysphoria, I'm lucky that not much makes me dysphoric when I'm horny which is often. Sometimes I wonder if my mind uses sex or thinking about sex as a distraction from things that depress me. I'm pissed that I can't figure out if I like men more than I like women, wish there was a way to VR or holodeck sex to get it figured out w/o sleeping around, since thinking and fantasizing are very different from doing it reality.

No prob, I need to start doing mine again... >.>;;

When I get angry past the point of yelling I usually self mutilate, taking the anger out on myself rather than striking others.

I have a few topless pics out there and I would dislike it greatly if someone ran around posting them, so I can understand.

Yea she is fine, just sore and bruised. Her car is going to need some work but it looks like it is intact enough to be repaired.

Also I have a mosquito bite on one of my mosquito bites... itchy booby. emotion_donotwant