• Cody,
    I had so much to say and so many feelings that I didn’t know what to do. You made me all flustered with emotions. Now I only have one feeling and that is hurt. I feel like I can’t love anymore. As if all the love I felt just disappeared into thin air. In the past we dated, then we would break up because of reasons hard to understand. Finally we broke up for good and you were gone. I thought I would be able to go on and I did. It was all my stupid idea to have Shelby to call you. I should have never heard that you were in contact with her and I should have never felt the emotions again. In the past I was silly when it came to love. I never knew the real meaning of it until that day we talked after so many days. My heart would beat fast when I talked to you and afterwards all I wanted to do was talk to you more. That first day you had said you still loved me and always would. I think now you just don’t know what you really want. I want to be able to trust my feelings when I speak with you but I just can’t. One minute I love you and the next I wish I never said a thing. Then I hated you and wanted nothing to do with you. God this is hard to even think about let alone write about. I want to love you, I want to see you, I want to be with you, but I’m not sure if I would be able to handle it. I mean it’s not like your ganna move from there and come live near me. So I might get jealous but I guess that’s what happens when you are truly in love with someone. I want to say have a good life and have fun but I won’t. I won’t be the one to break a friendship and never talk to you. Not again. I felt so horrible when we broke up the last time, just because it was me who ended it for the first time. ********! You were the one I actually fell in love with. You were the guy who liked me not for any part of my body but what was inside. You loved the real me and I appreciate that. s**t… I guess I’m saying that it would be best if we didn’t talk for a while. Give me space, but you were already doing that.