~ @ ~ Kids Corner - A thread for parents ~ @ ~ >>new poll<<

My favorite 'extra' baby item was....

Bumbo	8.7%	[ 6 ]
Car bottle warmer	1.4%	[ 1 ]
Wipes warmer	2.9%	[ 2 ]
Boppy/nursing pillow	18.8%	[ 13 ]
Bottle steamer/disinfecter	2.9%	[ 2 ]
Bassinet	7.2%	[ 5 ]
Diaper caddy/changing table	1.4%	[ 1 ]
Video monitor	4.3%	[ 3 ]
Other (please share!)	14.5%	[ 10 ]
...gold....	37.7%	[ 26 ]
Total Votes:			[ 69 ]

This poll closed on July 9, 2013.
No longer accepting new votes.

[Call Me Stephanie]

Nater: Not at all! You're a team and you need to know his plans... not for "checking up" purposes but for safety purposes. We do the same thing. I just am talking about fathers who refuse to "watch" their kids for a while so the Mom can get "me" time.

Velvet: I know you're not reading this but your family is in my thoughts! sad

Kayla: Yeah, I hate even using the term "watching"... He's not a baby sitter, he's having quality father/daughters time.

[Sammiifayse]

Michael is generally ok. If he is home, we're both watching the kids but one of us will be taking point (usually me for obvious reasons). He'll gripe a little about having to do stuff if he is tired, but everyone is grumpy when they're tired, so I don't really hold that against him. As I write this it's 2:30am and he is downstairs making a bottle while I changed Belanna.

[Mississippi Black Velvet]

Thanks again for letting the girls know, Mori.

Just to pretty much reiterate what Mori said my dad had a stroke this morning at 12. At 4 they sent him out to a Mayo Clinic about 3 1/2 hours away where they have neurologists on hand. Aside from him being hospitalized we know very little at this point but my mom and brother drove out to see him a little while ago.

Hoping for some good news.
U_U
He's still able to talk but seems to have suffered some possible paralysis to his right side. His speech is still pretty slurred and he had no control over his right arm.

But that's what's going on if yall don't see me much.

[Knitsy]

@ Stephanie: Precisely. I know waaaay too many people (mostly fathers) who refer to time with their child as babysitting. Even Tyler doesn't say he's "babysitting" aden.




So...ugh - incoming rant.

Some of you know that I don't have custody of Aden - for anyone who doesn't know, now you do. It's because when we broke up (when Aden was two), I didn't make the money to take care of myself and Aden. After that, my mental state just collapsed, and it became less about money and entirely about the fact that I couldn't mentally care for myself, let alone a child. I know a lot of people don't agree with that... but it didn't feel fair to pretend that I could be a good mother when I couldn't hold myself together at all.

Anyway, Aden is six now, and my whole life has changed for the better. I have tried SO damn hard to improve myself in every way, and it paid off. I make money now, I have a "real" job (as in not retail, a job with regular hours), and I'm mentally a million times better than I could've ever imagine. I owe a lot to Tyler for helping me get here, but it wasn't just him that did it - it was ME, because I'm strong enough to do anything I put my mind to. I know that and I'm proud of myself... and Tyler's proud of me, my friends are proud of me... some family members too, but my parents... they're not. They don't see what I've done for myself and for Aden at all. I try not to care that they don't see how I've improved my life, but it hurts.

Yesterday my dad texted me basically trying to make me feel guilty for not paying an $800 dentist bill that I didn't know Aden's dad had. It was just completely out of the blue, and the bill was even about a year or so old. He pointed out that growing up, my sisters and I were taken care of financially by our two real parents and any step parents we had - implying that I don't even try to take care of Aden. Aden has medical coverage through MY work - he doesn't have anything through his dad. Apparently the benefits card didn't work at the dentist (I would've had to go directly through my benefits provider) but nobody told ME that. So how the hell should I have known what was going on? Aden's dad doesn't speak to me - he refuses to. If he has to talk to us about anything, he goes through Tyler. I know that split parents NEED to communicate, but he doesn't seem to think it's necessary. I don't argue it - Tyler is a real team player when it comes to this. My parents, though, blame ME for that too. So Aden's dad took him to the dentist, didn't tell me (or Tyler) the problem with my benefits, and it's MY fault.

So I spent the evening in tears, feeling like a horrible human being. For something I couldn't even be blamed for. Tyler wanted so badly to call my parents and scream at them, but since the wedding is in three months I asked him not to. Instead he called Aden's dad to get to the bottom of this - and guess what? Aden's dad told Tyler the bill wasn't even outstanding anymore. His mom had taken care of it MONTHS ago and she didn't bring it up again. My parents just decided, out of the blue, to bring up an issue that was already solved. I feel terrible that I didn't take care of it through my benefits provider, but how could I have when we didn't know there was a problem?

I would sometimes just LOVE to move FAR AWAY from my family. scream

... Sorry for the rant. sad

[Knitsy]

Mississippi Black Velvet

Thanks again for letting the girls know, Mori.

Just to pretty much reiterate what Mori said my dad had a stroke this morning at 12. At 4 they sent him out to a Mayo Clinic about 3 1/2 hours away where they have neurologists on hand. Aside from him being hospitalized we know very little at this point but my mom and brother drove out to see him a little while ago.

Hoping for some good news.
U_U
He's still able to talk but seems to have suffered some possible paralysis to his right side. His speech is still pretty slurred and he had no control over his right arm.

But that's what's going on if yall don't see me much.

So sorry to hear about what happened - I hope you're all doing okay. Strokes are scary because they're a huge mystery. I hope you'll keep us posted as best as you can, and I hope you are spending time with whoever you need to spend time with.

[Izzy Derp]

Water thing Hope loves water she drinks it a lot. As for juice I have never really diluted it. Sodas and teas I do dilute. Her favorite things are mil and water.

@ KnitsyBitsy you seem like you need a hug. *hugs* I know what you mean on trying to better yourself for him and you. I know I am not your parents but I am proud of you. I am glad you overcome your hardships. Just ignore your parents. Sometimes hey just don't see our improvements. And want to focus on the negative. And our past.

@Velvet - You guys will be in my prayers. I hope everything goes well. *hugs*

[Knitsy]

@ Izzy: Thanks! whee

Tyler has a hard time wrapping his brain around why I don't just cut off ties with my family, even though they're so hurtful. And I realized why - because before him, I didn't have anyone who cared about me that much, except for my family. And now that I have him, and his family, I realize that mine never really seemed to care about me as much as I thought.

My biggest fear now is that when we're married and we start the legal process of getting custody, my parents/family will stop talking to me altogether. I shouldn't be sad about the thought of that, but I am. Not for myself, but for Aden.

[Rachuul]

I have spent the morning having a horrible Gerd flare up... I should have seen it coming, since I haven't been dealing with my stress... But anyway. My husband left work to take care of the boys ( I was literally sitting with my head in the toilet with Travis patting me on the back..) and I passed out from being in so much pain. sad ... Ugh!!!

I'm done and over this month!! I need to get back on all of my medicine and stuff...

[Izzy Derp]

@ KnitsyBitsy - Your welcome.
I can kinda understand where you are coming from. (Not all the way through) Though my ex didn't one care enough to take Hope from my custody. My family and her dads family brought it up briefly but he said no. At one point I offered to give him custody. But he refused. So I have full custody. Her father even let me move her out of state.
Her name is actually Hope-Serenity because of my mental health when she was born.
With Chris it was the exact opposite he always said that I shouldn't be disconnected from my family. As much as I wanted to for a long time I haven't. And for the most part they are starting to see the good I do, minus a few bad things they won't let go. Though it hurts for them to be like that at times. I ignore it.
I totally understand where you are coming from.
I really hope all goes well for you :/

[Knitsy]

If it weren't for Aden, I probably wouldn't even try to remain close with my family at this point. I just don't want him growing up without them around, and having him question it when he's older. And they always go behind my back and get time with him from his dad - maybe they're worried that we'll stop going for visits or something, so they're taking it into their own hands. And if we did stop spending time with them and they continued doing it while I'm not with Aden, I worry that they'll put it into his head that I didn't want them around or something. They've not conniving like that, but at this point I don't know what they'll do anymore.

[Mississippi Black Velvet]

Thanks for the kind words and support guys.

My mom finally made it to the hospital now I'm just waiting for her to talk to the doctor and call me back.
U_U

[Faerie Dreams]

Cyrus developed a rash all over his chest and stomach.... I kinda want to take him to urgent.care but idk... I think it's just heat rash (it has been real humid ) but at the same time with all our bad luck I'm paranoid it's some reaction to all the bugs he got bit by over the weekend... they were way less than helpful last time I took him in for a rash though...

[fluttershygonnaflutt]

So awesome, I too am a mother of one, but this is my second account, my main account is Kani-san smile this forum looks awesome. Mind if I join the conversations? heart

[Call Me Stephanie]

Kayla: I know those feels.. in fact, Brandon's family being better than mine is a BIG reason I've hesitated to leave him for so long. >_<

Rachel: I"m sorry sad



So... it started raining last night around midnight... and didn't stop until about noon... and it rained HARD. And of course I live in a ******** soup bowl of flat clayish land... so the water went no where. It ended up being up to my knees in some parts... I was trying to save the stuff from the shed but the water was too high for rain boots so I was walking bare foot. Then I walked out to a snake on the cement steps (all sorts of creepy crawlies were about trying not to drown. Saved a toad, let a wolf spider with her eggs pass, spiders every where, etc)... some of my stuff ended up ruined in the shed. I'm so sad... our renters insurance doesn't cover floods -_- And this is the second "disaster" that ruined some of my stuff (we had a fire destroy an apartment building we lived in June '09)... To top it off I had a shitty day, the girls were wild, Brandon had to go to work and didn't get home until 6 although he said he'd help me with the stuff... second "crisis" I had to deal with on my own (first was his discharge and being kicked out of base housing in 3 days while I was having a miscarriage). Pretty much decided that if things don't change drastically while I'm in PA, I'm filing for divorce when I get back.

[Digital Fiend]

Hi everyone! I'm trying to keep up:

@Velvet: I've been thinking of your family all day and sending prayers. Keep us updated when you can. heart

@Nater: I don't view it as controlling. Not every relationship is the same, but for me I look for an equal partner. I depend on him, and if he's going to be out all night, then he should at least have the common courtesy of calling and letting me know. It's not asking permission, but just "Don't worry, I'm out all night, do you need anything" or whatever. Now that we have a kid? It kind of is like he has to ask permission, just like I do. "Not, will you watch your kid so I can have fun" but more "Do you need a break? If so, we'll have a mommy/son night or daddy/son night."

I'm not knocking on other relationships because all that matters is that the people are happy, but that's what I want to be happy, someone who thinks of me and blah blah.

@Men/parents "watching": I really wish there was a better term too than "Do you mind watching William" because everything else sounds so demanding. Like, James is going fishing Monday which is his day off and he normally watches William. So, he's taking him Sunday night so he can worry about finding a sitter and I can kind of get a night of sleep. That's the plan anyway.

@Dreams: I'm horribly inept when it comes to rashes. If it isn't bothering him, then just google tips on how to help heal it. If it gets worse or it starts to bother him then maybe see a doctor?

@Steph: That's so horrible. >_< I'm sorry the weather sucked.

@Knitsy: You were/are an amazing mom. You put your CHILD above what you wanted. You didn't do it because you didn't care, you did it because you did. I am so proud to know someone that sacrificed and overcame.

They're your family and you know them better, but I'm an advocate that if the cons outweigh the pros, then you're better off without them. That is so incredibly frustrating to read and know I can't do anything about honestly. Pissants. All of them! (Maybe once you have custody it might get better though)

@Smoking: I'm such a pushover. I hate the fact that William is getting smoked around but nobody cares, and right now we can't afford daycare or have someone else watch him. sad I feel stuck and so super sucky.