Dealing with death, LD.

How do you cope?

Cry. Cry. Cry.	29.2%	[ 28 ]
Like a masculine guy	5.2%	[ 5 ]
Poker face	18.8%	[ 18 ]
Laughing	6.2%	[ 6 ]
Being unrealistic, pretending nothing happened	5.2%	[ 5 ]
I don't. I get depressed.	14.6%	[ 14 ]
None of the above. (Specify in a post)	20.8%	[ 20 ]
Total Votes:			[ 96 ]

[Centuries Before]

I tend to pokerface, as the poll puts it. Most of those who I know have died, told me that they'd rather I remember them as they were, rather than as they were in their final days before demise - this has been aided somewhat by not being present while they were hooked up to god knows what.

While I don't and haven't bawled my eyes out at the funeral, I do have moments where something might remind me of them (cancer adverts get me), which sets off the waterworks.

[the enlightenment]

Enchanted Glass

the enlightenment

I have yet to cry over someone dying. People in my family have died but I don't cry over it.
I find crying, hard for me to do. I'll cry twice every 3 years +. Crying is rare for me. Instead of sulking I rationalize, reason the issue.

When I "lose" people, I dont burden myself with sadness. Because I intellectually am aware that people are not possessions, they are not ours to keep, everyone has their own life path, everyone dies. I've accepted it, thus being sad doesn't happen.

But I do get sad when I lose material things. I am more sentimental over my material things, than I am towards people.

I'm like the other poster in this thread, I deal with my "emotions", on my own. Nobody is allowed to access them.

...Does this rationalization come easily to you? How long have you been working on dealing with things like that? Nobody close to me has died yet, but I can't imagine not being sad when it happens just because I intellectually know that everyone dies eventually. My emotions don't respond very readily to logic, generally, and most of the people I know seem to be the same way.

Yes it does comes easy to me. Considering how I have been like this since childhood.
I get confused when I see people crying over stuff like that. Intellectually I am aware of the reason.. But it doesn't make logical sense.

[Marcus Junius Brutus]

the enlightenment

Marcus Junius Brutus

Depends on who's dead. I bawled when I found out my granddad died, but years earlier when my nan died I barely batted an eye!

That's all I have to say.

You have feelings?

You assumed I didn't?

[Pseudo-Onkelos]

"Men are disturbed, not by things, but by the principles and notions which they form concerning things. Death, for instance, is not terrible, else it would have appeared so to Socrates. But the terror consists in our notion of death that it is terrible. When therefore we are hindered, or disturbed, or grieved, let us never attribute it to others, but to ourselves; that is, to our own principles. An uninstructed person will lay the fault of his own bad condition upon others. Someone just starting instruction will lay the fault on himself. Some who is perfectly instructed will place blame neither on others nor on himself." (Epictetus, Enchiridion 5)

[Seruubi]

When my father died, I was too young to understand death so I only cried because everyone else was in tears.
But when I finally figured it out, I watched home videos starring him and grieved. Now when I think of him I get happy thoughts- unless I'm listening to Us and Them.
I put my poker face on when people ask me about it. Sometimes I just wanna say he lives in Canada to escape the whole "I'M SORRREHHS I DIDN'T KNOWWWSS"

[tickle my totodile]

Don't know yet, haven't lost anyone since I was a small child.
A lot of people in my life died when I was too young to even remember their faces now.

[Buttery Biscuit Face]

I just want to be on my own all the time. I wish I didn't have a family right now.

[Radevel]

No one really close to me has ever died. I get sad for a minute and move on.

[zaptar13]

I haven't dealt with it with someone I know but if it happens I'll rationalize it and think it was bound to happen.

[White Trash Zombie]

I don't see what's wrong with crying when someone close you dies. You might be crying for yourself, but just because you lost someone important in your life. And though I believe we will eventually meet again, it's hard in the meantime.

I cry and get depressed, personally.

[Chartreusethewaterdemon]

I tend to have my moments of pure sadness the day of, and then find reasons to keep smiling the day after, My friends are pretty good at cheering me up. Its often not really the actual occurrence of death that hurts, its the places and objects that remind you of them, only to realize that you won't ever see them around there again... that's what hurts. As far as I'm concerned the people I've lost are in a far better place anyway though, so a prayer and a well-wishing to the dead I do, and then live on like I should, taking the love that they shared with me and spreading it around in their honor.

Death is the finale of life after all, the show preceding it is what we hope to be one that brought joy to ourselves and others around.


Santa Muerte shall take you when it is your time to go, simple as that.

[The_Dread_Toaster]

Vodka is Russian for I DON'T GIVE A ********.

[Bohemian Minx]

When my boyfriend died, I cried for years. It was most definitely the hardest I've had to go through.

Basically, you have to get all of your emotions out and talk to people. You may feel like you've heard it all. But there may be one person who can say the obvious, something you may have forgotten. Like..

"He/She would have wanted you to be happy."

You have to make a decision if you want to make the best out of things for the person you love, or to continue to suffer.. which will do no good. It gets really difficult. Losing someone isn't easy to get over. You have to do what you can and keep yourself occupied.

I use to write a lot of poetry to get it off my chest. After he died, 98% of my poetry is depressing. It's frustrating sometimes.. You might think that nobody will want to hear you be depressed about life. But depressing poetry is really good.. because you can relate to it. ....If you find that person patient enough to read it, that is. ^ ^"

You may have lost said person, but.. you still have people around you who care for you. So keep reminding yourself that you're not alone. It only feels that way because a part of you is missing..

When people die, I have a hard time believing that they're actually gone. I mean.. I know they are.. it just feels like they aren't. That makes it a lot easier to get through life. It feels like they're still by my side. So if that makes it easier, stop telling yourself you won't be able to see them anymore. However, don't get your hopes up and expect to see them.

[Only Gray]

the enlightenment

I have yet to cry over someone dying. People in my family have died but I don't cry over it.
I find crying, hard for me to do. I'll cry twice every 3 years +. Crying is rare for me. Instead of sulking I rationalize, reason the issue.

When I "lose" people, I dont burden myself with sadness. Because I intellectually am aware that people are not possessions, they are not ours to keep, everyone has their own life path, everyone dies. I've accepted it, thus being sad doesn't happen.

But I do get sad when I lose material things. I am more sentimental over my material things, than I am towards people.

I'm like the other poster in this thread, I deal with my "emotions", on my own. Nobody is allowed to access them.

"You have feelings?"

[the enlightenment]

XinfinitelyX

the enlightenment

I have yet to cry over someone dying. People in my family have died but I don't cry over it.
I find crying, hard for me to do. I'll cry twice every 3 years +. Crying is rare for me. Instead of sulking I rationalize, reason the issue.

When I "lose" people, I dont burden myself with sadness. Because I intellectually am aware that people are not possessions, they are not ours to keep, everyone has their own life path, everyone dies. I've accepted it, thus being sad doesn't happen.

But I do get sad when I lose material things. I am more sentimental over my material things, than I am towards people.

I'm like the other poster in this thread, I deal with my "emotions", on my own. Nobody is allowed to access them.

"You have feelings?"

Yes. I do not think being sad or in despair over death is productive, I could be completing important tasks and getting things done. Now that's productive.