Dear Tears,
Our relationship started.. by you making suggestions towards me I believe..
You somewhat made me feel happy when you acted as a true friend, told me that you like your time with me.. Sadly I kinda have to admit that I used you as a emotional board to bounce my feelings onto.. Someone.. to cling to.. I really hope you didn't mind that, I even gaia proposed to you when I was feeling that you could become my lifetime companion.. And I really did mean it, because I believed that we could be compatible that we could 'love' eachother. It really seemed like you were a caring person.. But, you rejected because of my daughter.. who was going to marry shy-hugs at the time anyways so I have no clue why she got jealous... Although I really do love her heart. -sigh- Soon after that you seemed to.. crawl away from me. You rejected my proposal.. although you could have been in my heart forever.. it seemed you didn't want to be, that you didn't really love me this felt obvious that when you didn't mind me rejecting sexual activities and dated someone much younger/ having sexual activities with him instead.. I mean.. you didn't care when I objected to you dating someone when I was clearly trying to be the closest gaia person you knew... Soon after that I dated someone younger too, who you objected to aswell.... Needless to say, I broke up with her, but you never let me back into your life, and continued dating the same dude instead. So I wandered slowly away...
Soon you only started saying hi to me, like we are only casual friends. Which makes sense, since you weren't loving on me anymore. So I detached my feelings from you too.. and then we grew further apart, and you always kept a possy of friends whom I didn't know around so that you could be busy with them instead of talking to me.. I remember one instance where I tried catching you when nobody was around.. I was trying to explain that we seemed to be growing farther apart.. and you were like.. 'oh my friend showed up' and you started talking to him, almost ignoring my presence. Yeah call me kiddish.. but I think I was right on deleting you, since we drifted so far that it didn't seem like we could hold a conversation anymore.
A widely known secret of mine.. deleting people off my 'friends list' means pretty much nothing to me, if I see the person regularly I would treat them the exact same.. I believe that friends can be friends without a list. In fact this list here doesn't even matter very much to me. So when I deleted you and you avoided talking to me because of that.. you kinda failed as a friend. Because I still valued you as one, but pretty much assumed that you didn't care for me the same, and all you did was prove me right. Eventually I had to pm you and ask you if you would ever want to talk to me anymore, and your answer was quite clear to me.
Sorry for bothering you & farewell,
Theo~
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