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I may be gullible, but I'm not stupid.

And I'm not made of glass.

If you drop me, I won't break.

I might crack a little, but, no one really notices that, right?

I can tell when I'm being discarded. It's happened before. I'm sure it will happen again. You don't have to hide it. I'm not fragile. If you take off my blindfold, I won't shriek at the light. But for some reason people think that of me lately.

All this week, I've been saying, "It's alright. It's fine. It's okay. I'm fine with it."

I should probably stop pretending that people won't find someone else....get sick of me. Everyone's always telling me how nice, funny, or happy I am, but no one ever wants to stick by my side. Am I really this transparent? People can tell that I'm not aways happy? Why should it matter?

I feel like Ritsuka, entranced by the beautiful words of others...beguiled by a fleeting emotion. But for me, the manga series isn't over, and I'm not a 12 year old boy. What's my excuse?

Oh, and I used to feel so simple all the time. I was the epitome of peppy.


You know...

I just love being strung along like a marionette.

And I love when people keep things from me.

Remember me? I'm the girl who'll tear open her elbow to write "Hi" in blood on the lunch room table. Quite the masochist. Understandable? Sure.

People say things they don't mean.People don't say things they do mean. Why can't I get that through my head? Why do I keep following along dumbly like a lost child?

Case 4.

Nothing new I suppose.

Too many times. Too many people. Too many things were taken away.




I'm not mad.

Well, maybe a little at myself.

But I'm Gen. How could I ever be mad at anyone?



It's just not possible...


...right?