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 Posted: Tue May 09, 2006 7:30 pm
Brooding and Pay Phones
(crossposted from Rabid's WFP thread)
"Julian, for God's sake, wake up!"
"Get-off-me-!"
"Jesus Christ, Julian, stop it! It's me, wake up!"
Something was restraining his hands, forcing him to stillness. It made him feel trapped, vulnerable, exposed - he had to get away, fight them off-
"Alright, that's it. This is for your own good."
"Ouch! s**t, what the...what the hell..."
Julian's face stung not only from the overly-familiar cuts and scratches, but from the ringing slap the one restraining him had delivered. Breathing deep, trying to calm himself, the assailant's face finally came into focus.
"Oh..."
Shrugging off Jacob's loosened grip, Julian looked around the break room in a state of disoriented confusion. It was empty but for Jacob, thankfully. Taking a few more breaths, feeling his heart pounding far too fast, he glanced once at Jacob's shocked expression and then looked away again.
"Thanks." He said flatly, getting up quickly and abandoning the break room, burning with humiliation.
---
"God dammit."
Taking a long sip from his water bottle, Julian sat huddled on a bench outside the hospital's foyer. Contenting himself to watch the anonymous mass of people that moved in and out of the building in a stream, he let himself brood for a bit. The cuts had healed over, though a thin streak of blood remained, leaving a trail down to the hollow of his throat.
"What the hell. If I have to start popping pills to get a moment's peace..." he muttered, ignoring the curious glances of some of the passerby. He hadn't gotten a single decent night's rest in he didn't even know how long - he was starting to hope something would jump out, attack and beat his head in, just to see if he could get a bit of sleep.
Not for the first time, he forced his resentful thoughts towards Liam. He hated to admit it to himself, but he wanted to blame Liam for what was wrong with him. The incident with Rabid that day on the grounds had been bad enough - the changes to his personality he bore with a slight bitterness, but he still accepted them. He just wanted someone to blame for the terror he felt every time he tried to rest. He knew perfectly well something was wrong with him. He didn't know what, and he didn't know why.
Who better to use as a scapegoat than the one that had brought him back.
Abandoning the bench and wandering aimlessly down the parking lot, Julian walked off the hospital's grounds and set off on the sidewalk. He was sick of working. Let them yell at him when he got back - he couldn't honestly say he cared at the moment.
---
He'd wandered for nearly an hour, still brooding. He'd been trying to piece together the nightmare for what felt like the thousandth time. No matter how he tried, he couldn't remember anything but a few foggy details. A mirror... only that god damned mirror. Every time, it was all he could recall. He barely noticed the people skirting around him, most wary of his stormy expression.
It was when he reached the pay phone that a random surge of what felt like homesickness jabbed at him. He'd barely seen his own family in days. And Rabid.... not since that day on the grounds.
That did it. He was sick of being antisocial.
Feeding coins into the slot, he dialled her number quickly, cursing when all that picked up was the machine.
"Hey, Rabid, it's... it's me. It's Julian..."
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Posted: Sat May 13, 2006 1:14 pm
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Posted: Sun Jun 18, 2006 9:27 pm
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Posted: Fri Jun 23, 2006 6:03 pm
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 8:55 pm
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 8:57 pm
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Posted: Tue Jul 04, 2006 7:04 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 6:55 pm
Blackout
Julian woke up in a haze, lying on the floor. He didn't remember falling asleep, and from the lack of stinging pain he was certain he couldn't have been out long. Pushing himself up, he cringed at the savage beating of a headache. The soft light of the room pierced through his eyes like knives. Shielding them frantically, biting back a moan of pain, he grit his teeth and got up unsteadily. He recognized this place now. He was in the hospital, in an empty room. He tried to remember why he was there.
Ah...right.
A patient had died in this room.
Leaning against the edge of the bed, remembering more and more by the second, Julian shuddered awfully at the recollection.
Limbs thrashing in agony as the woman went into seizure, screaming at the top of her lungs-
"Gods, awful, awful..."
Eyes wide and raging, spitting out curses in an unintelligible argot, flailing hands reaching out to tear at the doctors' faces-
He remembered her dying. Flatlining, the defibrillator's failure to charge. He remembered Jacob shouting orders, Julian himself trying to resuscitate the woman, her eyes staring into his as he desperately tried to shock her back, a new defibrillator at hand.
The woman gave a long scream before she died, arms falling stiff to her sides and her body seizing up. Bloody froth welled up from between her lips, reminding him with a burst of horrified memory of Kaego, dying and laughing as she ordered him to kill Crow-
"Nnnh...."
The headache had suddenly grown much worse.
Jacob calling the time of death, Julian pulling the sheet over her face. The body being sent down to the morgue, Julian looking over the charts, history and contact information. The other nurses and doctor clearing out, the interns looking sick as Jacob dismissed them. Julian, left alone for a few minutes in the room, suddenly feeling dizzy-
He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to ignore the pain.
Feeling disoriented, dizzy, the room was spinning.
And he could hear Kaego whispering in his ear...
"Blazeh!"
Julian jolted up off the bed, the headache dissapated and his senses returned. The thought of Kaego infuriated him and sickened him, hatred of her filling him.
"b***h," he hissed, fists clenched and nails digging into his palms. His eyes were wild and his face was set in fury. "Whore, ******** evil b***h, na'az mel ya-"
He choked himself off in surprise. He was raving at a memory, and he'd just... spoken....no. Just a slip up.
"Adyamaur."
Julian jumped nearly out of his skin, whirling around. His boss stood with her arms crossed, dark eyes glaring at him and teeth bared in a snarl.
"Where the hell have you been?"
Julian flushed and waved his hands aimlessly, head ducked down.
"Quit the bullshit, boy. Get back where you belong, or so help me God I'll gut you with a scalpel."
Julian knew the woman too well to know she wasn't kidding. Rushing past her and heading back, he pushed his blackout out of his mind. He'd figured it was just the lack of sleep finally catching up with him.
He hoped.
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Posted: Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:02 pm
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Posted: Sun Jul 09, 2006 1:04 pm
Gifts Diehard_Dreamer With a thunk, crash, and maybe a kazam a gift was left in front of Lenore's room. Though it seemed with the efforts of Aphrodite and Nariko that had left... a potted plant? No, it was toy... I think.  Aphrodite
Hehe, I'm sorry this is so late. It's a dancing Venus Fly trap toy, that when wound it dances to "Highway to Hell." I though you'd like it.
-Aphrodite
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Posted: Tue Jul 11, 2006 1:09 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 13, 2006 7:37 pm
Nothing
Sitting alone, eating lunch and idly doing homework, Ethan stole glances at the table across the cafeteria. Syrelle was sitting and laughing with a few of her friends, talking about who-knew-what. His eyes lingered on her for a few moments, then he ducked his head in sudden embarrassment as she glanced his way. He dared to look up again slowly, relieved to see that she hadn't picked up on his staring.
"You're a true pathetic, you know that?"
Ethan looked around, smiling.
"Hello, Nen," he said pleasantly, budging over to make room at the table. Nen, a neutral-faced girl with bizarrely pale blue eyes and blue dyed hair, sat next to him and shrugged her bag off her shoulders. Taking a french fry from his plate, she glanced a Syrelle with mild interest.
"What d'you see in her, anyway?" she asked, nibbling the fry. Ethan blushed violently in response.
"Sh-she....ah..." Ethan swallowed hard. "I...j-just like her, that's all..."
Nen snorted and shrugged.
"Hey. Whatever. She's moderately intelligent, I guess I can let her try you out before I ruthlessly jump your bones when you're not looking." Nen said calmly, ignoring the fact that Ethan's blush had deepened to a brilliant fiery hue.
"J-jum-" Ethan mananged to croak, tugging the rosary wrapped around his wrist out of nervous habit. Nen laughed, cool and calm.
"Chill, Eth'," she said patiently. "You look like you're gonna have an aneurysm."
Taking a handful of fries from his plate, Nen nodded over in Syrelle's direction.
"Look who's comin'."
Ethan's head snapped up, eyes wide. Syrelle was coming towards his table with two of her friends, still talking and laughing. He suddenly found that sitting and breathing at the same time was impossibly difficult, and decided that holding his breath would be the best choice. Nen watched him with detached amusement, almost pitying.
"Syr-"
Syrelle walked by without noticing him, deeply involved in conversation. Ethan blinked, stupefied, and turned in his seat to watch her go.
She looked over her shoulder for a moment at him, regret on her face.
And a boy, handsome and well-built, called out to her from the table she approached. Syrelle looked at Ethan once more, then went over, smiling brilliantly.
Ethan sank low into his seat, the blood draining out of his face. Nen glared at Syrelle's back, lip curling and eyes taking on peculiar luminescense.
"b***h," she hissed. Turning to look down at Ethan - she had to look down, for he had sunk far into his seat - she patted his shoulder comfortingly. "M'sorry, Ethan....she..."
Ethan stared hard at his food, appetite gone. He knew that boy. Randall Tyll. Well-to-do, smart, popular.... everything Ethan, in his own view, was not. He wasn't surprised Syrelle liked Randall over him - who wanted to go out with a skinny, scarred Earther with a weird accent?
Getting up and seizing his tray, he left Nen at the table with his head hung low.
---
"Mom...Dad....it's Kris. Please pick up."
Ethan's hand clutched his cellphone tightly, plastic biting into his skin.
"Matylda. Strom. It's Kristof. Pick. Up."
Blinking back tears furiously, he growled and screamed into the phone in Slovak.
"Pick up! Pick up, damn you! I'm your son! Don't you even care?"
With a cry, he pitched the phone into the street, relishing the sound of it smashing.
"Ethan...."
Glancing over, expecting Nen, Ethan's breath caught in his throat.
Syrelle.
"What do you want?" he asked harshly. He was in no mood for pity. Syrelle flinched at his tone but came closer.
"I wanted to apologize for not talking to you..." she said. Ethan glared at her, then shrugged.
"What do I care?" he said snappishly. Syrelle ventured closer until she was shoulder to shoulder with him. She looked very uncomfortable.
"Ethan, I'm sorry," she said. Ethan didn't reply. She put a hand on his shoulder, looking worried. "What's wro-"
"Nothing! Nothing is wrong, Syrelle. Everyone always asks, 'what's wrong?' and you know what? Nothing is! I'm just a bit pissed off and want to be left alone!"
Syrelle backed away, shocked. Ethan had never raised his voice before, never expressed anger....at that moment he looked ready to explode. A flicker of humiliation flitted over his face as he pushed his hair back from his face, sleeves riding high on his arms as he moved. Syrelle's wide eyes stretched wider and she clapped a hand to her mouth as she saw.
"Ethan! What...what happened?"
A cold lump formed in Ethan's stomach, and his humiliation doubled. Tugging the sleeves down again angrily, he pushed past Syrelle and headed back inside.
"Nothing."
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Posted: Tue Jul 25, 2006 2:45 pm
Vicarious
O' pilot, tis a fearful night, there's danger on the deep -
Drowning drowning drowning. Water all around. Couldn't breathe, no air, no air!
-I'll come and pace the decks with thee, I do not dare to sleep -
Thrashing, sinking, all the same. Water was a crushing force, threatening death. Death, death, what a strange thing to think of.
- 'Go down,' the sailor cried, 'go down - this is no place for thee. Fear not! but trust in Providence, wherever thou mayst be."
Death....
Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad. To stay under, be crushed in that cold black pressure...no. It wasn't so bad at all...
"Ah! Pilot, dangers often met, we all are apt to slight, and thou hast known these raging waves but to subdue their might." -
The cold. Ah, the cold. Skull-splitting, clawing, awful cold. Hated and despised, it was. Unwelcome.
In lieu of the arrival of the cold....death was certainly suddenly very unattractive.
"It is not apathy," he cried, "That gives this strength to me, fear not but trust in Providence, wherever thou mayst be." -
Moving through the water was next to impossible. It seemed thick, thick as sap, as mud, as quicksand, impossible to navigate with purpose. Air floated with devious swiftness past, shining silver bubbles in the black mass and up to the surface.
"On such a night the sea engulfed my father's lifeless form; my only brother's boat went down in just so wild a storm-"
Blackness. Darkness. Foul hated cold, all mixed into once despised thing, a state of existance, who knew what it was. All there was anywhere was pain, anger and resentment, boiling over and festering within. Drowning for a split-second more seemed like a pleasurable fate, but the stabbing craving for air dashed the hopes of slipping peacefully back into the deeps.
"And such, perhaps, may be my fate, but still I say to thee, fear not but trust in Providence, wherever thou mayst be."
The surface was close, and then... air. Life.
And the sounds of screams.
---
"Julian? Hey, you alright? Man... Do we have to start taping oven mitts to your hands when you sleep?"
Julian woke slowly, caught inbetween the comfortable stupor of sleep and wakefulness.
Wait...he'd been asleep?
Sitting up and looking around, disoriented, Julian gave a startled jolt as Lenore poked him. Sadako lay slung over her shoulder, staring at him balefully.
"No screamy when sleepy. Nice change," she said tartly.
Lenore glared at the doll and made a face before turning to look back up at Julian. A book half-read was clutched in one hand, it's pages all dog-eared and torn.
"You okay?" she asked again, looking curious. "Me an' Sadako were readin', then you started kinda twitchin'. Gasping for breath, too. Like you were drowning or something."
Julian shrugged slowly, checking his face for scratches. Nothing. He gave a relieved smile and nodded.
"Yeah...I'm okay," he said. He glanced at the book in half-interest. "What were you reading? I thought I heard you talking..."
Len held the book up for him to see. The Poems Complete of Thomas Haynes Bayly was emblazoned on the cover.
"Ethan let me borrow it. He said I'd like it. I was readin' one of the poems to Sadako." she said. "You sure you're okay? You look kinda pale."
Julian nodded again, marvelling at the absence of cuts and blood.
"Honest, Len. I'm fine." he said. Sadako merely snorted.
"Liar."
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Posted: Thu Aug 03, 2006 8:10 pm
Birthday
"I don't see why Mum was in such a fuss gettin' us out of the house," Len griped to Ethan as they sat out on the grounds. The day had turned out to be obscenely hot and they had taken to sitting in the shade, trying to keep from suffering heatstroke. Sadako lay slung across Len's shoulder as always, grumbling and muttering as the sun beat down on her silk-haired head through the leaves of the tree.
"Want go in," she whined to Lenore. When the girl failed to give a proper response outside a bored shrug, the doll rounded on Ethan. "Freeloader-Boy will bring Sadako and Len inside. Sadako hates the hot. Len hates the hot. Want to go inside NOW."
Ethan merely shrugged and continued reading his book, indifferent.
"Sorry, Len," he said patiently. "Crow wanted some time alone. And when the person in question has claws capable of rending flesh from bone..."
"...You clear out fast, I know, I know..." Len finished sullenly. Sitting back against the tree and staring out at the lake, she winced as Sadako tugged insistently at her hair again. " 'Dako. Unless you wanna get ripped up and thrown down the disposal, quit it already. We go in when we go in."
"But-"
"No buts. Hey, COLE! Coooole, c'mere, boy!" Len called, distinctly irritated.
Rising up from the sprawling shadow of the tree upon the ground, Cole yawned and stretched before trotting over. Snuffling at Ethan indifferently, he wormed his way in-between him and Lenore and laid his massive head on the girl's lap.
"Here. Take Sadako and go fly away somewhere far away. Far, far away," Len said, taking the irate doll from her shoulder and letting the zombie-dragon delicately take her in his mouth. Watching as the dragon calmly departed with a cursing doll in his jaws, Len sat back against the tree, then nestled up next to Ethan.
"Y'all been acting weird the past week," she said accusingly. After a beat, she added, "Well, weirder than usual, anyway. Scurryin' around hiding stuff and not letting me go practically anywhere in the house. Did I do something? Or...like...are we gonna get blown up? Attacked? Kidnapped again?"
Ethan wrapped an arm around the girl's shoulder and laughed, shrugging again in playful secretiveness.
"I don't know, Len. Can't say," he said teasingly. "Sworn to secrecy."
Len stuck her tongue out at Ethan and snatched the book from his hands, flipping to the first page and starting to read it herself.
"Jerk," she said fondly.
Ethan grinned and pulled out the auxilary book he'd brought out of his bag.
"Brat," he said, ruffling her hair.
---
Three hours later
"Ouch! Dammit, son of a bi- ooooh no. Ishta! Doll! Wait... Julian! Juliaaaan!"
Julian, always prepared, had the fire extinguisher in hand and sprayed it on the ruins of the fifth blazing inferno that was supposed to be a cake calmly. Doll giggled and clapped, taking up handfuls of the powder and throwing it around.
"Oooh, dry snow, dry snow, kinda smells funny, still fun," she chirped.
"That's right Doll, it's snow," Julian said. Glancing at Crow, he sighed an shook his head.
"Crow...abiswa, sweetheart... I don't think you quite get the concept of '450 degrees for twenty minutes' instead of 550 for ten," he said gently. Crow, covered in a fine layer of white dust, said nothing, but bowed her head morosely.
"She's my kid, Nahal, and I can't even make a decent birthday cake," she said miserably. "She's a year old! This is a landmark, or...er...timeline mark...oh, you know what I mean! And quit laughing," she added warningly. "I saw your wrapping. One book does not require half a roll of paper."
Julian winced and glanced over at the table. Black wrapping paper lay scattered around, partially shredded and a large rectangular blob wrapped up in silver ribbon perched on the table.
"Well...okay. One of two things I don't do well. Dancing and wrapping things," Julian said. "When are they coming back?"
Crow glanced at the clock and groaned.
"In about fifteen minutes," she said. Diving into the fridge and pulling out an enormous bowl of cake batter, she fluttered around trying to prepare for another attempt at baking. Julian grabbed her shoulder and shushed her, trying to fight back a terribly amused grin.
"You're gonna kill me for not telling you," he said patiently. "Emergency cake, vegetable drawer. Pre-baked, frosted, candles included."
Crow stared at him, then growled and snapped her teeth at him.
Doll, ever stealthy, grabbed the bowl of cake batter and dipped a finger in, sampling. Deciding she liked it, she snatched up a spoon and started eating, sneaking off into the living room to eat.
"Yummy, yummy, gooey cake," she sang to herself.
"Ive been baking for five hours!" Crow howled,oblivous to Doll's batter-thieving. Removing a good-sized gravestone shaped cake with "Happy Birthday Lenore" emblazoned in dark red frosting from the fridge, she set it on the extinguisher-powder covered counter and started trying to clean up.
"You," she managed, still clicking her teeth at her brother, "finish wrapping an' get the cake-thing set up. Go. Now. Before I kill you."
Julian bit back a laugh and obeyed, brushing shredded paper off the table and attempting to set his badly-wrapped gifts up at an angle where they would look normal and pretty. It was a dismal failure, but at least he tried.
---
"-so then, oh, it was so cool, the guy's sending chum over the side of the boat, right? Well, he does this for a little bit, listening to the two other guys talk, looks up, throws more chum in, an' then Jaws pops up reeeeally close and swallows all of it, and the guy goes, best line ever, "We're gonna need a bigger boat." It's true, too, like halfway towards the end the freakin' shark ate the - hey...what's on the door?"
Lenore paused in her chattering to look at the black bow that decorated the dented and claw-mark covered door curiously. Turning back to glance at Ethan, she frowned in confusion at the amused look on his face.
"What? What's so funny?" she asked, pushing open the door to find the room pitchblack. "What the..."
Still half-coated in white powder, Crow grinned and waved at Lenore as she finished lighting the tapering black candles on the cake.
"Happy birthday, Len!" she said. Doll beamed at the girl, still eating the cake batter out of the bowl. Julian grinned sheepishly and waved a hand over the badly-wrapped gifts.
"Surprise," he said. Ethan smiled at Len and shrugged helplessly.
"They told me to keep you out of the room so they could get it ready for you," he said.
Len blinked in confusion, staring at the cake and gifts, then slowly smiled.
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Posted: Sun Aug 06, 2006 9:26 pm
House Guest(Cross-posted from Jeanemon's journal) Click!
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