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 Posted: Tue Apr 12, 2011 10:32 pm
 Reflections on: Bringing Down the House
Hello Journal -
It has been...A weary couple of days. After another battle with Kyung Tae, the man I claim to love, I have punched him in the gut, accosted him and brought him to my home to recover. I feel that I must express that while it sounds worst then it...it is tremendously and immensely far worse then any words I could express anyways. I come to you journal not for advice but to log the tremendous trouble it was to have Kyung in my home.
I must say, the good news is that my mother and father had no idea about Kyung what so ever, seeing as that Xiao and I his him well in Xiao's large mansion. It was trial though as we suffered through Kyung and I's constant bickering coupled with the fact that I had hurt him to the point of causing his weak constitution to sicken him more.
It had been a trial as he was angry with me. Nothing I did pleased him either. The food was too thick for him to eat and I didn't let him sleep. I was told by Xiao that they spoke briefly and that he had a good feeling, whatever that meant. At the very end, though it was time for me to take him home and it was hard. How could I feel that giving him up was hard, after all, he still hated me with every fiber of his being. We had a brief connection though, As I made him home made Porridge and he ate it all, He came to me in delirium as well, and let me hold him.
I didn't tell him this, nor anyone else. But I stayed with him longer then I should've, he was sleeping so peacefully in my arms. I played with his hair, his cheeks. Laid kisses on his brow. No matter what I did, I didn't feel wrong for doing it. I was as if Love had fully taken me over. There wasn't anything I wouldn't do for Kyung that moment, to keep him resting peacefully. To have him trust me so. It was thrilling and exhilarating and it made me ache. One day I would hope that he felt the same. Instead of thinking to kill me maybe, when he wasn't sick, he would instead turn to me for love.
But alas, the moment had to end. I had to return to my duties and return Kyung to his home. I gingerly and bitterly lifted him, wrapped in one of my blankets and carried him from my home to his. His frame was so light, it didn't bother me to carry him and still, I didn't want to give him up. I am lost journal as what to do next. I must keep strong though, this was the baby step in him returning any feeling to me besides hate.
After I returned him home, I returned here with a knowing look from Xiao. Thank the Goddess that Xiao is....such a true brother. It must be because he is in love that he understands my predicament. Well Journal, I am tired from the days and so, i will blow my candle out for me too sleep.
I will write more to you when I can
-Huang
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Posted: Tue Apr 12, 2011 10:33 pm
Reflections on: Actions are Louder then Words
Good evening Journal -
It has finally happened. After much tribulation, after much battling and a falling out of a budding romance and friendship, Kyung had returned my feelings. We talked, we talked so much that day.
He had snuck into the estate, bold and daring and dressed as a woman. I was told that this wasn't his first time either by my charge Lady Sara, who had met with him the first time thinking he was an enemy. Sara, I had to give credit to because she had handled the situation as best as she knew. Kyung why, wouldn't hurt a fly but Sara didn't know him. This brings forth the question of how easy it must be to sneak into the estate! I will have to talk to the guards for my brother's estate to tighten them so that Xiao and Sara need not worry. However, this journal is not for that.
As I was saying...Kyung had snuck into the estate, dressed as a woman with a gift for me. Mind you that I am still trying to win his affections and that the thought that he would attempt a dangerous antic to give me a gift? I was in disbelief. I escorted to him a lover's hidden area of the estate, one that not many knew about and one that I made sure to remember in case of danger. We talked.
We talked of Shin-Mu, the first noble I had ever come to love and how I fell apart from her. It was heartbreaking to think of how I hurt her so, to think of how young and foolish I had been. He had been attacked by Shin in retaliation for the pain I caused her. I anger at the thoughts and at myself, I had caused so much pain to both of them, even then Kyung stood in front of me with the bruises and busted lip of his face that Shin had caused and still talked to me. I was shamed that he had to deal with this all.
And in the midst of the shame, Kyung's gentle touch was like a gift from Heaven. He had come to me, given me the gift of a infinity knot and then....he kissed me. It was as if joy spread from my chest out! I was thrilled, so very thrilled. Even now as I write about it, I cannot but fathom the joy I felt in that moment. From being constantly rejected to being accepted, The goddess had shined her light down on me.
Even now, I can not be happy. It is such a wonderful thing. we have promised to go on a date. Clothes shopping he says. I am just pleased that he wants to spend time with me. Though not so pleased about the clothing part, I do not look good in any wear besides my uniform after all. With that being said Journal, I will retire to sleep now. I have much to prepare for, and little time to do it.
-Huang
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Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 11:57 pm
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Posted: Tue May 24, 2011 1:08 pm
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Posted: Tue May 24, 2011 1:09 pm
Reflections on: Getting Caught by the Worst Lunarian Ever
Dear Journal,
I have distressing turn of events to write about journal. I was heading to the Tae estate to talk to my beloved Kyung. I had not seen my love for awhile now and had a free night to visit him under the guise. Though for some reason the Tae estate didn't mind much when I visited, in fact I know of some of the servants intimately like friends and though I still feel like I have to sneak in, there was an underlining feel that I was welcomed there, like I was wanted. Hence the visit to Kyung. Though the methods I went around to it were probably not the best, I was determined to see my noble lover before the night was out.
I have to stress right now, My night did not end up in the hands of my gentle lover. Instead I spent most of the night bickering with my enemy Bataar and then getting the goddess lights beaten out of me by the larger man. I cannot even began to tell you how I hate Bataar at this moment for ruining a perfectly good chance to spend a romantic evening with Kyung. Even as a I write, my hand is shaking in anger and regret. Had I not been so cocky well, I would've realized the Mongolian had set up camp in the Tae estate.
It seems that the only reason that Bataar did set up camp there was because him and Kyung are some kind of cousin and he was offered a patch of land in return for being a guard. Maybe I wasn't wanted after all? Especially if they had the large Mountain captain to intercept any of the intruders, maybe myself included?
What happened next, I am neither proud nor shamed by. We started talking and the more we spoke to each other, the more pissed we got at each other. It was a damn nightmare, a repeat of our first meeting. but I was a fighter grown strong now, I wouldn't take his crap after the first night we met after all, the one where he said he would let me live for payment of my body. No, I would not let that happen again, It was high time I returned the favor of being beaten to him.
Though things didn't go as I planned. We battled, exchanged our words of hate and spite and in the end Bataar was victorious. So not only did I return without the gentle touch of Kyung for the night, But I returned Beated, bloody and blue. And still pissed off. I can remember the jokes xiao attempted to make about Kyung beating me into submission or something when in fact it was his interfering cousin Bataar.
Regardless, I returned with a bloody nose, scratches and now a large cut across my chest, Something that Xiao's fiancee had to stitch up for me being a good enough sister. In fact, the scar remains to this day as I write this, for our healers couldn't remove the long cut from the man's sword. After the battle with Bataar though, I have begun to realize that I will need something to counter his powerful sword. I will test the weapons in our warehouse on the morrow to see if I can find something subtle for myself and powerful enough to defend myself from him
I sleep now as my injuries still pain me. Good night Journal,
-Huang
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:22 am
Reflections on: Errands to Run
Dear Journal,
I have dire news to report in here, something that makes my blood boil. I will first start off by explaining what happened during the day.
It had started out a lovely day and Lady Sara was eager to be out of the house. I do not blame her as she had been well guarded the whole time without really being able to leave, it must have been stifling for a young child like herself. Regardless, Xiao and I decided that since there was no attacks on the young priestess that it would be okay for her to accompany me with Errands. I in fact was excited as well to be able to calmly...escort her? Is that the word I should use? Regardless, It had been a joyful ride with Sara in which we both talked to each other.
She was curious young mind, and in the end we decided to play a game together. I knew so much about her already, it would be only fair if she knew just as much. Our game, I thought would be the beginning of where I started to feel a brotherly affection for her. She was Naive and Innocent, something I felt like needed somebody to look up to? Regardless, Sara had wormed her way to somewhere special inside of me and I felt no qualm about answering any question she asked. We talked about things, personal things that I had been unable to tell most. We talked of Kyung and how she had met him, and in her earnestly, she had given me the choice to be accepted again, for the love I had with Kyung wasn't some impure choice I made against my alliance. In that moment I believe that it was then I decided to make Sara one I would die for. There wasn't many in my life that I would do that for, not even some of my esteemed family. She had forged a bond between us that not even my blood sister could compare to.
It was this day though, that started so innocent and pure that went downhill. Even though we joked moments before, We didn't even have time to enjoy the market long. I am ashamed that my distress caused such a bad day for Sara but in truth what I write hear now, will be shocking to myself the most.
Journal, I talked to one of the many spies at the market place, fishing for news on the nobles. Some was given to me, some things I had already known and some I passed along to the vendor. When I thought I had gained all the knowledge I could, The vendor waited until Sara had moved away to lay the biggest rumor of the time.
He told me that my mother, Chi Lee of the Lee's legions was seen with a noble captain, flaunting in his camp and moving about it like she was one of its own. A spy even said he heard her talk about her plans to kill the family, take Xiao and defect to the Noble's alliance. Needless to say that the rumor floored my once happy atmosphere into one that....disturbed me. I gathered our goods and rushed poor Sara out of the market without another word. I had gotten the name of the spy to follow up on the rumor and wanted to speak with him immediately. After I left Sara, confused and a bit saddened at the estate, I rushed to meet with the spy and gained everything I could about this rumor. Normally I would shove things like this aside but....Mother had been acting stranger of times.
I had my own doubts about this said rumor and even after talking with the spy, I was going to shove it off. Things he said were things he couldn't see clearly. Words he said like May have, could have, should have didn't concrete his evidence but.....The idea of her betraying us was one I could fathom and so....I continue the search for said rumors. If she means harm to our family, I will stop her with everything I am and everything she built me to be. I will have to be strong if it comes down to that moment. Until then, I will continue to search Journal and right what I find here. I will sleep now, with these thoughts.
-Huang
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 1:35 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 2:44 am
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Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 2:48 am
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Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:00 am
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Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:02 am
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 12:02 am
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Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2011 1:03 am
Reflections on: Rumors pt. 1
It started with the rumor. It always starts with a rumor. Something that begins based of a fact and warps as it passes from one mouth to the other. It was things like rumors that caused grief, that caused wars and that caused pain. There was no expectation to the madness that Rumors always caused. There could be no good.
It was things that haunted Huang-fu as he piled over report and reports from his own team of spies. It had taken the talk with the merchant when he was with Sara, The rumor that Kiran had heard and little tidbits from his group to set him on the path of searching for facts.
Facts that could tear his family at the seams. His mother had betrayed them all, this was the rumor. He had her watched, It wasn't easy but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Didn't she have any plots or was this just a ruse for the Nobles to tear down the family? It was making Huang anxious, Panicky. His whole life had been for this, to be the shadowed pillar that kept the family safe along with his sister Xia. Isn't that what their mother taught them since the cradle. Huang was the third son born, Xia the only daughter, They had been useless in the political games of Nobility. Chi, their mother had forced them into the life of a Shadow. Huang was assigned to the Eldest brother, Xia to the second brother Shaoran. How could it be that she was the one to betray them all.
And yet, Huang felt that if it was anyone to betray their legion family, it would be their mother. Always hungry for power, always hungry for the wins. Did she think by going to the noble side, that she would be more powerful then the Legion? Huang didn't know. He wasn't his mother, he never had to worry about power.
Information was his friend, Information was his ally. It was information he was absorbing after all. One by one, his reports reported the same thing. Chi had been seen by one certain Noble Captain and that was it. Maybe that was what he needed to focus on instead, The Captain...His name was Kadaj, young, powerful and an upcoming star in the noble's army. A powerful man, was it any wonder that Chi might have attracted. Or maybe it was the allure of the other Captain that she had been seen with. Shinta Ringo, the brother of the Suzaku warrior of the Empire's army. He was hot headed, and ten times more powerful then any of the noble Captains of the army. Terrifying if she had gotten her hands on such a powerful ally so early in the game. There was only solution to that problem as well, he'd have to confront Ringo personally.
If he rooted the information down, he could get a well enough picture. He would confirm it of course, innocent until proven guilty but he was beginning to see the master plot that His mother was forming. The only survivor in the massacre of the Lee's Legion: Xiao. It wasn't odds that Huang liked, no, His family would survive, even if it was a trade for his mother's own life. His first Enemy: Shinta Ringo. It would start with him, and from there, It would all end.
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Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2011 1:05 am
Reflections on: Rumors pt. 2
Its has happened. I have confirmed my mother's betrayal now. After I had my talk with Ringo, After I confided in my brother Xiao my findings it was clear. We had to do something. Our battle...It starts.
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Xiao was silent as he sat with his bride to be Shu, together their hands intertwined in a pact of silent trust and love. Though Shu was not part of the royal family, nor any family of noble blood, she had made her way into the family as one of their own. Everyone but their mother approved of the girl anyways. He sat though, with his fiancee's hand tucked in his, listening to his his youngest brother, his guardian and one of the top assassin's of the Legion drop a bombshell that even Xiao couldn't deny the outrageous story Huang was telling him.
"Is this even possible?" Shu's voice was quiet as she clenched to Xiao's hand in fear and support, "Has your mother really betrayed the family to Nobles?"
Huang sat cross legged on the ground in front of the two, his head bowed respectfully before pulling it back up. he knew formalities weren't needed with Xiao but none the less, he would be respectfully of his master and lord. "It is not only possible Lady Shu, but it is already in motion. Our family is in danger." Huang nodded. His body tightened as he heard more bodies approaching and readied his needles, pointing them at the door of Xiao's room before relaxing. It was the scent of his sister and his 2nd elder brother. "It seems the last of the family has arrived." Huang nodded as Xia and Shaoran entered. His sister nodded to him as well, in the past trial of finding out the truth of his mother, she had put aside her hate for him and joined him in the search, she as well knowing just the injustice of their mother's plotting. Shaoran though, followed Xiao's orders regardless, He was after all only a soul conduit player of the family.
"Brother, Sister." Xiao gestured to the seat's next to them as they took their seating. Xia sat as Huang did, formally on the floor by their master's side. Noticing this, Xiao sighed and gestured to both of them, "You both shall sit at the table as well, If it is the truth of the matter at hand, we are no longer in need of the formalities our mother instilled in us." Xiao gestured to the seats and then smiled. Shaoran gave a huff before gesturing to Xia as Huang and her both rose to sit at the table.
"If I could be so bold." Huang looked to Xiao before looking at the others, "We are against the one who made us who we are. She shaped us to her liking, to be instruments in her whimsical army." Huang laid his hands down on the table before looking to his family, the ones that had been used and abused. It took the fear of falling from the inside to gather them together to bring the family back to sanity. "But the fact remains is that to her we're nothing but tools. Obviously she plans to destroy us to accumulate new ones. We know the truth." Huang pointed to the slips of papers from his spies, Xia too added her bits and pieces to the conversation as well.
"We'll have to prepare a counter attack to her." Huang nodded his head, "She's going to use Kadaj, her Noble captain lover as a frontal force attack and sneak her way in again. Father is the only one who doesn't believe us and so has opted out of this mission. He's...." Huang looked at Xiao before looking back at the paper, "Father has seen fit to end his life before Chi got the chance too." Shaoran and Xia looked away, Xia mumbling under her breath about the weakened old fool, conflicting emotions in there eyes. Xiao held Shu who had begun to cry softly instead. Xiao had already known of their father's early demise into the afterworld. The news was one of the many that Huang had collected within the plots of his mothers plan. Their father's body was found yesterday morning, his infamous sword, once bloodied Noble soldiers instead pierced right through his heart with a note sealed in his blood. It seemed he knew of his wife's deception all along and instead of being a victim, took his life in shame instead. Huang felt only a bit of remorse for the loss....He never knew his father after all besides missions and the occasional talk of how Xiao's protection fared. Neither parent was very supportive of their youngest children. "We have lost the support of father, so the leadership of our clan goes to Xiao." Huang looked again to his eldest brother and when Xiao nodded again, Huang exhaled a breath. "Noble Kadaj and Chi underestimate our group. They'll begun their attack thinking we are weak and stupid and they'll leave no one behind. Though Mother, from the information I have gather will be taking Xiao as a hostage for negotiation with the Empire. Whether or not this is true, we all know of her obsession with brother. It is why Shu and Xiao haven't been able to marry for this long."
He sighed at the simpleness of of the plan Chi was thinking of. A hit, burn and run kind of attack. Kill, burn the evidence and then run to her noble allies. He had been trained for this, even if Chi didn't expect it. Did she really think he would stand idly by and be killed? Obviously Xia and the rest felt the same as they gave him the same detrimened stares. They all craved life, their was no way they would lose.
"Xia and I have already...." Huang looked up as Xia got up to stand by him, resting her hand on his shoulder. He took a small delight that they had bonded. In truth, he needed her just as much as she needed him. "We're going to set up the ultimate defense we can with the soldiers and spies we trained personally, none of the ones that Mother trained nor hired are assigned to his household anymore." Huang outlined the plan to his family, Xia pointed out her contributions and in the end, they all sat back in thought.
"Someone could die." Xiao rubbed his eyes as he looked at the plan, the map of tactical points of battle and then to his siblings. The last he looked at was Shu who looked back at him, she smiled softly at him. Steeling himself he looked at his brother and sister and nodded, "Begin the preparations for this attack. It won't be long before Mother realizes what were doing. Speed and Surprise will be our best bet." Xiao watched as Xia nodded at the command before getting up to leave, Shaoran followed her as well, discussing the moves they would make together and separately. Alone again with Huang and Shu, he looked at his youngest brother before coming over to him. "Your the one who has the most danger here Huang. Your fighting Kadaj....and Mother." Xiao touched Shu as she came over to them and made Huang sigh.
"Kadaj, I only need to drive away. Mother....Chi will have to die. This was the plan from the start Xiao." Huang looked away as Shu gasped and made Huang grit his teeth, "It won't be a problem. Xia and I will take them down together, She will be my support after all, no one knows our fighting style best besides each other. Remember your part Brother and Lady Shu." He looked at them, "You and Shaoran are to leave as soon as the battle begins. You two..." Huang nodded, "Will have the life you finally deserved, Married. Together." Huang took their hands together before smiling at them, "It's time." He nodded as he began his preparations. He would win...for his families sake. "Let's start the defense now." Huang steeled his face and soul for what was to be done next.
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Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2011 1:06 am
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