MeltingOrgasms
One of my bf's was talking about dumping a guy because he asked her to pick him up for dates. Personally I find it weird but not worth completely leaving someone. The main thing I was worried about was the fact that she was so upset. I really didn't see the problem. He doesn't have a car but she does. But as far as I knew they seemed to get along to really well so maybe it's just me.
Discuss.
What would actually make or break being with someone.
Is she overacting?
Have you heard or actually left someone for something minor?
Hmmm ... I wouldn't break off a good thing over someone not owning a car. I suspect when people break up over something like that, chances are there are other more serious issues in the relationship.
On the other hand, if the bf lived across town and never chipped in to pay for fuel, well, I can see where that might get old, especially in a casual dating relationship.
There are several qualities I view as "dealbreakers" when it comes to dating or romantic relationships. Some of them are:
1. A criminal history. This isn't written in stone and depends upon the nature of the crime.
2. Miserliness/penny-pinching. NOTHING is worse than a cheapskate date. And yes, there is a difference between being prudently frugal and being a cheapskate. This is indicative of selfishness and is never good news in interpersonal relationships.
3. Alcoholism, smoking (cigars, cigarettes, pipes, anything else,) and substance abuse of any kind. It's not that I'm prejudiced, but I have sensitive sinuses. I dislike the odors related to many of these vices.
4. Unhealthy eating habits. I gain weight quickly and easily. I don't want to hang out with people who constantly eat junk food or like to eat late at night. It's not that I have a problem with people eating what they want when they want; it's just that they usually expect their friends or their dates to eat with them. This isn't an issue related to the person's size; I know plenty of average and skinny folks with terrible food choices and habits.
5. Incompatible education level and/or socioeconomic status. I once married a great guy I really loved. He was poorer and less educated than I was and it became a bitter bone of contention if we had an argument. It obviously bothered him and he expressed resentment because he felt I'd enjoyed an easier life than he had growing up. While it was probably true, it's not my fault and I don't care to be reproached for it.
6. Lack of independence. I expect a man in my age bracket to be self-sufficient and self-supporting. I don't have a problem with a man who lives with a roommate or even with his parents so long as he is gainfully employed or enjoys other income sufficient for him to live independently if he wished to do so. He also should be able to competently perform basic household duties and look after himself.
7. Mental or emotional illness. I'm not prejudiced against people with these problems, but I'm unqualified to be a good partner to someone with mental illness or emotional illness. This is more a "It's not you. It's me."
8. Sloppiness/Messy Housekeeper OR Excessive Neatness. I want to live in a comfortable, tidy house, but I don't want to get screamed at if I leave a book on the coffee table.
9. STD. I don't have any. I don't want any. I might like you very much, but I'm not going to sleep with you if you have one or more STD's.
10. Incompatible sexual attitudes. I support monogamy and fidelity. I have no problem casually dating a guy who plays the field or seeing him as a friend, but I'm not going to take him seriously.
