How i came across these i have no clue......but a lot of them r messed up blaugh
>Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
>Ask your Mom.
>
>How do you know when you're really ugly?
>Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.
>
>What is the quickest way to clear out a men's restroom?
>Say, "Nice d**k"
>
>How do you know when you're leading a sad life?
>When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Lets just be friends,"
>
>Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
>Because they have cotton balls.
>
>Mom's have Mother's day, Dad's have Father's day, What do
>single guys have?
>Palm Sunday
>
>Why is being in the Military like a b*****b?
>The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
>
>What do you call a 90 year old man who can still masturbate?
>Miracle Whip
>
>What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts?
>Her Navel.
>
>What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
>A Bingo Machine.
>
>What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
>A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
>
>What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
>"Are you sure it's mine?"
>
>What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
>Beer Nuts are $1.25, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.
>
>What three two-letter words mean small?
>"Is It In?"
>
>Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
>Mace will do that to you.
>
>If you are having sex with two women and one more walks in,
>what do you have?
>Divorce proceedings, most likely.
>
>Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
>Everyone has the same DNA.
>
>
>>What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying
>at half mast?
>They're hiring.
>
>What do toilets, a clitoris, and an anniversary have in
>common?
>Men miss them all.
>
>Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
>Breasts don't have eyes.
>
>.
>
>What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep under each
>arm?
>A pimp.
>
>Why do drivers education classes in Redneck schools use the
>car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays?
>Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed. class uses it.
>
>What's the difference between a Southern zoo, and a Northern
>zoo?
>A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front
>the cage, along with a recipe.
>
>How do you get a sweet little 80 year old lady to say ********?
>Get another sweet little 80 year old lady to yell "Bingo"
>
>
>
>What's the difference between a Northern fairytale and a
>Southern fairytale?
>A Northern fairytale begins "Once Upon a time" A Southern
>fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this s**t." ;D
krash16 Community Member 
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