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...But you can't take the farm girl out of the girl.

A little bit ago I got laid off from my job, which super turbo sucks in its own ways. I was hoping to get to go to the family farm, reconnect with my roots, in a sense. Being that I was laid off from work, the opportunity to go and enjoy the farm this year all but went down the drain.

That really sucks, because in 2022, 2021, and for the last few trips I have gone to the farm for in general, it was always to bury someone in the cemetery where our family just... goes, when we die. I haven't been able to go to the farm just to enjoy the farm, but to say goodbye to another loved one that had passed away.

I know it might just sound edgy, or morbid, but I have had the misfortune of losing a lot of family in my life in general. With the exception of the last 2 years, it felt like someone was dying in the family, and sometimes I wouldn't even get to say my goodbyes to the departed, as I didn't know them well enough, or I was just straight up not informed of their passing. I cherish the fact that I was able to say goodbye to those that I have gotten to say goodbye to, and any time I go to the farm, I make sure to make a stop by the cemetery where many of my relatives reside.

I moved across the country, so going to the farm is more difficult now than it's been ever before. Instead of being an 8 hour drive, I am at lest 13 hours away from the farm. I hope to go sometime soon, but "soon" might mean 2024, and I really hope no one else passes away before or during that year...

I'm sure no one reads my journal entries, but y'all, this farm girl misses her pasture.