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Walking through the halls at school, seeing the nameless faces and hearing them laugh with one another...It makes these walls seem empty for me. I am on the outside looking in, like a person observing fish in a fishbowl.

Or perhaps I and the fish being so closely observed for any flaws that might have me tossed out into the fryer.

I suppose the lonliest feeling is having someone you love who loves you, but they are not with you. I understand and love the feeling of having a person within my heart, but I am a physical creature. I long for hugs and kisses, a gentle kiss and a softly whispered, "I love you."

I guess I am even lonlier due to Friday's events, but I have to stay strong. I trust him. He makes me feel safe. It is so rare for me to love, trust, and respect someone as well as feel safe with them. If one of those things is even the tiniest bit off, it cannot work for me.

Gah...I am terrified of solitude. I do not wish to look to my old "friends" for release since their blade did very little for me. Razors are old "friends". I would like to keep it that way...