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Anticipation
Do I really want to go through this...should I? Maybe I'm not ready, what will it change any way. It's a lie if someone says that you can totally get over some one because you still have the memories. When you hear their name or anything about them it reminds you. Especially if it was the first. It reminds you of the mistakes you made and the good things from it. I won't regret though. never. how can I it changed me for the better. I can only thank and not hate. He responds to me and my heart quakes why is this. Is it because i still feel something for him? Do I just miss him? Or is it just my pride afraid to get hurt. I am strong. I must keep my head high and never let people have the notion that i might be think less likely of myself. I am strong. I will survive. I can do this. I can wait and listen to his words. The words I've been wanting to hear but maybe i wont' want too afterwards. I will know soon enough because i'm too stubbern to let myself let get of it without knowing. I 'm dieing to know why. The truth may hurt a little and may not sleep so well tonight but it will be better some time down the road. I know it will. I look back at this and smile. Oh god please let it be for the good. I'm ready now. Wish me well since that's all you can do and everything else is on me. I am ready. I can do this.
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