Character Name: Jack Burnett
Location: Under one of the blue canopies of the Hydration Station
Action: Writing on cups
Jack was sulking when he reached the station he was assigned to as a volunteer. If he was to work at a place called the 'Hydration Station', why wouldn't he have be allowed a water gun? And yet they had seized his from him at the front entrance when he'd tried to enter the festival because it hadn't been on the list of permitted things allowed to be taken inside. Not even for volunteers.
This was especially disappointing to Jack because other than the fact that he believed water guns were an excellent way to stay cool, his plans had been thwarted. As fascinated as he was with people, he had hoped to spray water at those passing by the station and those standing in lines in order to get their reactions (the latter being way more fun as victims because they couldn't escape).
As cunning as he liked to consider himself, however, it didn't take the teen very long to devise a new plan for the sake of his entertainment. He absolutely refused to push sales on people through 'heavy suggesting' or otherwise because he wasn't a salesperson. This wasn't a job and they couldn't make him. Besides, peoples' reactions to purchase suggestions were way more predictable than a blast of water to the face. No, he had a better idea.
First, Jack found a stack of the small cups that volunteers like himself were supposed to offer to people waiting in line. He sat down under one of the blue canopies with it and put down his bag, rummaging through it to find the Sharpie he'd been allowed. Taking a cup from the top of the stack, he got to work scrawling something on it with the permanent marker in what might have been considered surprisingly neat handwriting for a boy his age.
"Whoever snuck the 's' in 'fast food' was a clever little-"
He was going to write 'b*****d' before realizing the cup could have been read by a kid. So instead, he put 'monkey'. Satisfied, Jack smiled to himself before setting the cup aside and starting on a new one.
"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."
"I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones."
"The trick to being smart is knowing when to play dumb."
"The next best thing to being clever is being able to quote someone who is."
"If you are persistent, you will get it. If you are consistent, you will keep it."
"War doesn't determine who's right; it determines who's left."
"Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad."
"Fake friends are around when they think you're cool. True friends stick around when they know you're a fool."
If he knew the author or speaker of a quote, he would write their name on the bottom of the cup. Deciding to shake it up a little, sometimes instead of a witty saying or quote, he would put a joke or riddle with the answer - if it had one - on the cup bottom. Some were long, some were short, others were simple, and still others more complicated.
"What always runs but never walks, often murmurs, never talks, has a bed but never sleeps, has a mouth but never eats?" "Answer: A river."
"yy u r, yy u b, i c u r yy 4 me" "Answer: Too wise you are, too wise you be, I see you are too wise for me"
"It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally."
"You will always find me in the past. I can be created in the present, But the future can never taint me. What am I?" "Answer: History"
"A Buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand and says, 'Make me one with everything.'"
"What begins with T, ends with T, and has T in it?" "Answer: Teapot"
"What belongs to you, but others use it more than you do?" "Answer: Your name"
"Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana."
Soon he had his very own stack of cups. He was actually enjoying himself as he thought about the looks on people's faces when they read what was on the cups. That would be a show all its own; the entertainment to satisfy him in place of his foiled water gun attack. What he didn't stop to consider was whether or not he would get in trouble for what he was doing.
At least not until his elbow knocked one of the cups down, causing it to roll toward the feet of one of the official South Hydration Station staff members. Scrambling after it on his hands and knees, he paused upon seeing those feet and, looking up, smiled sheepishly at the staff member, giving them a guilty little wave.
