Last night I had the worst dream I've had in a while. It had Edward in it, but that wasn't the worst part. I won't go into the other stuff...
Anyway, for some reason I had to team up with Eddykins to do something or other. I did feel a bit disillusioned, in that I actually thought he was cute. x_x And yes, he did sparkle. When I came to my senses (sort of) I started calling him names such as "sparklefag" and "glampire" (the latter of which I ACTUALLY USED in my dream, because I remembered it from yesterday, even though I swore to kill whoever used that word).
Anyway, I knew in my dream that SMeyerpires were invincible. I grabbed Eddykins' ugly sparkly head, pulled him close, and told him, in effect: You are living on a tiny planet revolving around a tiny sun among billions of other stars in a vast universe and are short-lived and insignificant. Your life is meaningless. Et cetera. This made him horrified at first, then he fell into depression and I think he may have killed himself, but I'm not sure. I definitely got rid of him, though!
wink So that's how you destroy an invincible vampire: You make them realize there's no point in living, so they kill themselves.
Also, when I went into FYE earlier I took a Wii Zapper, pointed it at the cardboard standups of Edward, and pretended to shoot them off like a vampire slayer. And I bought the Nintendo controller messenger bag.
I also found this:
http://9gag.com/gag/21099/ 
Reply
