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 Posted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 5:34 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 22, 2014 3:53 pm
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Posted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 8:39 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 4:56 pm
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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 6:55 pm
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Posted: Mon Apr 03, 2017 5:32 pm
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Posted: Thu May 04, 2017 7:20 pm
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Posted: Tue May 09, 2017 7:12 pm
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Posted: Thu May 18, 2017 7:59 pm
Solo
Anandi couldn't sleep that night.
She rolled over in bed, staring up at the soft, darkened curtains on her bedroom window. She was twenty-one now, old enough to legally drink. She had a small, used, well-loved car with which to drive to her fairly well-paying job. She had enough money to buy groceries for the family she helped to support. Her older siblings had moved out long ago and started lives of their own. Anandi had tried...
Gwen had left a long time ago.
They parted on good terms, neither wishing harm upon the other. They didn't break up because there were problems in the relationship. Gwen had to move far away, and she wasn't sure a long-distance type of relationship would be feasible. Anandi had cried for many weeks thereafter, especially after finding out about her grandparents' estate. The family would have to move to India to help with hospice care and sorting of the estate. Belongings would need to be sorted, bills paid, property sold. Fate had torn them apart and it broke Anandi's heart for many months. She knew things had to be this way despite her pain and suffering.
Gwen was a very strong, fiery sort of personality. She seemed to excel in physical combat and had prowess to spare. As an eternal senshi, her capabilities were unmatched as far as Anandi was concerned. She looked up to Gwen as something to aspire to. Anandi felt inferior in every way when she compared herself to Tsui. She lacked the power and the bravery that made Tsui such a force to be reckoned with.
Even though they loved each other, Anandi was too frightened by how her parents might react. One of their own, a lesbian? Such was frowned upon in India, where stonings were a very real punishment to be feared. While she didn't have to fear stoning here in the United States, she would likely be shunned. Anandi was sure of it.
Perhaps that was part of the reason why she and Gwen had to part ways. Were they ever meant to be?
She was young, back then. It was over three years ago. She'd just started at her software engineering internship position, fresh off sending hundreds of applications to anywhere that might hire her. Being a woman and being foreign on top of that exposed Anandi to both racism and sexism the likes of which she hadn't experienced before. Heartbroken, Gwen was still by her side through it all. Gwen encouraged her to keep trying, to prove herself as capable as any man in the same position would be. Despite discouragement and waning self-esteem, with Gwen's help, she pushed through and landed the job she still had today. She was able to work remotely from India - not at all uncommon in their industry - and was given an office position upon her return.
But did that really mean anything, in the grand scheme of things?
What did money really mean?
As Sutai, she instinctively knew she had a duty. She had obligations to the snowy star and to the mountain for which she was named. Running away from it all, out of fear and shame, had been Sutai's modus operandi for two years now. Returning to Destiny City upon completion of months and months of work through attorneys and land ownership laws, Anandi found the city to be a little less... bright. Less feisty. Less... Gwen.
They'd exchanged emails for a while before Gwen simply stopped answering. Busy, Anandi figured. She would need to get a new job, a new place to live, new friends, new patrol routes... Gwen couldn't live in the past. Desinty City represented a blip on the timeline of life for her. Tigers lived in and for the present. She couldn't blame a tiger for being what it was. Anandi couldn't live in the past, either, as much as she desperately wanted to.
So, the emails stopped. Anandi deleted that old email address in a bid not only to move on, but to keep from tying Gwen to the past. She couldn't do that to the brave, fearless Sailor Tsui, who was no doubt causing problems for the Negaverse in some other city. She was eternal, a fierce fighting force that would no doubt mentor new senshi to come. Nothing could stop Gwen. Nothing.
Still, the thought that her fearless tiger was somewhere beyond reach still tugged at Anandi's heartstrings. She'd packed away the plush white tiger before the family's move to India, and there it stayed. Anandi couldn't bear to lay eyes upon it, and asked her mother to donate it to a children's shelter. Perhaps the tiger could bring comfort and strength to someone in need. Anandi needed to learn to stand on her own, like Michel said. Like Sessrumnir insisted.
She, as a Squire, still hadn't received her signet ring. It was a deep, bleeding mark of shame for her. Even Pages had their rings, and yet Anandi had powers for several years now. She was convinced Princess Polaris would be incredibly ashamed of her knight for forsaking her duties, for being too cowardly to climb her mountain. That's what Sutai was known for - cowering from battle, an immature flavor of bubbly best reserved for school-aged children. She wasn't the tactician Tsui needed her to be.
Anandi gripped the blanket closer, swallowing a sob growing deep in her throat. Her heart constricted but she couldn't make a sound. To ease the burden on her parents, Anandi shared a room with her younger sister. She knew Kalpana had a very important volleyball game in the morning and could use all the sleep she could get. Kalpana had been training with Meadowview High School's team since their return to Destiny City, and this game was one of the last of the school year.
Taking in a deep, slow breath, Anandi let the tears fall silently onto her pillow, too ashamed to roll over and face her sister on the other side of the room. Tomorrow was another day. She had people who counted on her now, now more than ever. She couldn't afford to cry for much longer. Sutai needed to be stronger than that.
Anandi needed to be stronger.
1,046 words
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Posted: Thu May 18, 2017 9:01 pm
Solo
The moon was heavy in the sky that night, a whispering, cold wind blowing through her thin and ornately-adorned costume. Sutai swung her legs slowly from her perch on the lip of a quiet office building's lonely roof. The night was quiet without any parties or twenty-four-hour coffee shops on this street. It was the kind of solitude that allowed one's thoughts to wander.
The Squire gazed up at the moon, wondering where her beloved Princess was that night. Were they looking at the same moon? She so wished she had her signet ring. Maybe then she could write a message to the Princess and ask her everything that plagued the Squire's mind. Without any other way to contact the senshi, Sutai wrote a letter in her mind.
Princess Polaris, she thought. It's me, Sutai. Are you okay? I mean, I heard you got married to Mister Nifhel. Congratulations! I'm sorry I couldn't be there... I remember you saying that sometimes, life really gets in the way of us doing magical things. You're definitely right. Sometimes life takes up too much of our time. It's the unimportant things, I mean. Car maintenance and bills and posts on the internet...
...I mean, those are important too! In some capacity, anyway. But you know what I mean. Without us to try and stop the Negaverse, there wouldn't be any bills to pay or job to go to or cars to maintain. I don't really know what they want for certain, but I know it's really terrible. Some of the Negaverse use their power as an excuse to hurt other people just for its own sake. Isn't that scary? It's like the power goes straight to their heads and then they break all the rules because the police can't stop them. Even at their least powerful, the Negaverse agents can outrun a police officer. When they get more powerful... I mean, you already know. You've been doing this for so much longer than I have! And you're a princess, too!
How many people have died, Princess Polaris? How many people have died when they didn't have to?
A shiver passed through her. Death was a terrifying thing to Sutai. She didn't want to think about how many innocent lives were taken, and how many people threw themselves to Chaos because of the lies its representatives told. How many children were hurt or orphaned? How many spouses lost their significant others? How many families were torn apart and left homeless?
What gave Chaos the right to take all these things away from people who were simply trying to live their lives?
What could one simple, cowardly Squire do to stop any of it?
She felt so alone...
Princess Polaris, I do try. I really do, I promise. I know I don't have my signet ring yet and I'm really embarrassed about it. There aren't any excuses, when it really comes down to the wire. It's so very embarrassing... I know I'm supposed to climb the mountain and figure out where to go from there...
Since coming back to the city after Grandmother and Grandfather passed away, I've met so many new people. It's like they're being called into action every single day, and there are still so many more left unawakened. It seems like, every single day, both sides gain more members. Do you think anything will ever change, Princess?
You're royalty, so you probably know a lot more than I do. You're a royal and you're a wife, too. You're older and wiser than I am. When you ascended to royalty, I think the world got just a little bit brighter. I think that power probably inspires a lot of people. I know it inspires me! It's not that I want to be as powerful as you - I don't think that's possible and... I'm perfectly happy with that. It's just... now that Gwen is gone, I'm not sure what my place is anymore. I can't lead like you do, and I'm not a fighter like Gwen or Sessrumnir. He said I needed to be a Knight for myself, but it's hard to figure out what I want since...
Since she hadn't ever stopped to think about such a thing.
Sutai would rather revel in the simplicity that makes up the superficial surface of life, forgetting the brutality of the war that held Destiny City in a death grip. The nightly news was aglow with new murder suspects, property damage, headlines spattered with domestic terrorism and accusations against the very people trying to save it. Her mother would spit worry and fear towards the 'domestic terrorists' without even knowing her very own daughter was among their ranks. Sutai could never bear to tell her. She would be immediately disowned, if not worse - turned in to the authorities as a criminal.
She hung her head. How could she blame her mother? It was a natural reaction fueled by the fear and anger in the media. It made her so upset to see just how twisted the truth was. If people could really watch what the senshi and the knights were doing, then they would see who was really the evil in the city! They could see how much damage the Negaverse was doing to property, how many people they had killed or displaced...
Her heart was with the frightened families, the innocent civilians simply trying to live their lives. They didn't know the full extent of the war that raged through their streets night after night.
But did she?
The Squire knew her knowledge was limited, and purposefully. She knew she wasn't capable of appreciating, understanding or coming to terms with the depth and depravity. It hurt too much to think about how some of the Negaverse officers enjoyed murder and inflicting pain and suffering upon innocent people. She knew some of them loved the feeling of immunity, loved being able to outwit and outrun the police. They were able to break laws and get away with thievery and murder in ways no normal human could. Or should.
It was sick, really. Sutai could never think that way. She wouldn't purposefully harm another person.
Princess, I know I'm not the strongest Knight from our star. Or the smartest. Or the bravest... but the star chose me anyway. There has to be something I'm good at. Something I can do to help you and everybody else. Mister Sessrumnir said I needed to find my own reason for being a Knight, a reason that didn't have anything to do with you. He said we don't work for or under any royal, that we're autonomous. He said that we should make our own way and not worry about what the royals might think. He seemed upset that I love you so much. I think... I think part of him is right.
I think we need to find our own path, for certain. We each have our own Wonder and whatever past was there. Maybe none of us served a royal, and maybe all of us were just assigned to a spot to guard or... I don't know. Mister Sessrumnir is a very grumpy man but I think he's right anyway. I don't know his reason for being a knight but I think he wants to protect people, just like I do. He just does it differently.
I also think maybe a lot of the knights are lonely, too, without the senshi from their planet. We're like a team, you know? I bet it can be so very lonely to try and find your prince or princess, only to come to the conclusion that they're gone. Mister Nysa spent a great deal of time trying to find Princess Neptune, but never did. He said she was gone. Maybe she was never here to begin with? Maybe she wasn't even real?
But... part of me is so very happy to have been able to meet you. I think that's really rare among the knights - meeting the senshi. We're all like a team, you know? All of us from Polaris. All of us guarding the star and having a special place there that is just for us. Miss Delphi has many buildings, and Mister Alphubel is still discovering his special place. Mister Whisler too! He used to be part of the Negaverse but someone came and fixed it, so now he's a Knight of Polaris too. Even he has a special place to call his own on Polaris, just like you do.
It proves there is still good somewhere in the Negaverse, that there are good people there who were lied to and deceived and made promises just to gain their service. Maybe someday, we can purify a whole lot of them, and show them that Chaos isn't what the other Agents said it was. I know a lot of them are probably scared and feeling alone, just like me.
I hope someday you come back to us, Princess. I know Mister Sessrumnir doesn't think I should care so much, but...
You believed in me when nobody else did, Princess.
That's why I love you so much.
1,526 words
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Posted: Sat May 20, 2017 6:28 pm
SoloHe wouldn't discover it until the next day, carefully hidden among the various other legal documentation scattered across Judge Alexei's desk. It was a small, unaddressed white envelope and therein contained a letter. It was handwritten and addressed to the judge himself; Quote: Dear Mister Alexei, It's me! Sutai! I hope this letter finds you well. It's been a real pleasure to see you when you're not working too hard. Did you remember to eat today? Mister Shiloh says you work long hours without breaks and that's just not very good for a person's body and mind. Maybe you really enjoy working, but still. It would make both Mister and Shiloh and I so very happy if you would take breaks more often! At least rest your eyes! Back when we met those weeks ago, you probably thought I was crazy, didn't you? And I don't blame you, really - I am running around in a tutu and trying to stop people from stealing ladies' purses. Wouldn't anybody think I was crazy? Anyway, I'm so very thankful that you were nice to me, and humored me, even though you probably thought it was all nonsense. Even seeing you again in the cafe was nice. I didn't think we would see each other again, but ever since that youma nearly killed Mister Shiloh, it looks like all three of us are friends! You don't mind if I think of you as a friend, do you, Mister Alexei? I know you probably don't believe everything I've told you, and that's okay. It's really a lot of information, and when we grow into adults, it seems like the magic in the world slowly dies away, doesn't it? We lose our imagination and have to look at everything with cold logic. Luckily for us though, magic really is real! I don't know if you've done the research, but my mountain isn't actually on Earth at all. It's on Polaris! Polaris used to have a whole civilization on it, with buildings and castles and a princess. It's covered in snow, and it's funny that my outfit doesn't really belong in a snowy place. The mountain there is my special place, my Wonder. It's my job to protect it, along with the rest of the star. Our Princess is from Polaris too, and she's a really lovely person. I love her very much. She's one of the first people I met when I got my powers the night that Mister Camelot saved my life. There is a lot of evil in the world, Mister Alexei. I'm sure you see it every single day, presiding over those cases. Do you oversee everything, like murders and kidnapping? I imagine it gets very difficult to see the worst of humanity every single day. I can't imagine what that's like, and maybe it even becomes difficult to sleep at night. You're a pretty amazing person, Mister Alexei. You go to work every day and see all these terrible things and yet it doesn't seem to bother you very much. Or maybe you're just very good at not letting these cases get you down. I promise to keep doing my best and keep you and Mister Shiloh safe. Someday, I'll be a Knight. I'll show you my new weapon, I promise. See you soon! ~ Sutai
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Posted: Sun May 21, 2017 12:20 pm
Solo
Anandi felt like she'd learned a great deal about life in the last few years. As much as the Horizon Institute was an excellent place of learning for the Indian girl, it didn't introduce many important life skills and philosophies she would need in adulthood. Tax preparation, managing a household when single, how not to become another murder statistic in a magical war most citizens in Destiny City knew nothing about thanks to the suspected corruption of the media...
...mountain climbing...
HITS wasn't known for its athletics, and thus climbing much of anything wasn't high on Anandi's to-do list (unless one counted citywide test scores). She felt wholly unprepared for climbing the mountain for which she was named, even thought, by all accounts, her previous excursion with Delphi was successful. No one was injured, died or was otherwise stranded. Delphi was able to secure a large enough rock for the ritual she needed to perform at her own Wonder. Anandi knew the plateau they had reached was only the halfway point, but hadn't the slightest idea how she knew this.
Too frightened to continue, Anandi had opted to leave the mountain and return with help and more supplies. The stone staircase, seemingly carved directly into the rock of the mountain itself, was slick in texture though never seemed to keep any snow. The stairs were cold as the ice around them - Anandi had reached down to touch both the stairs and the short banister-esque border lining either side. Both were extremely cold, well-carved and beautiful, but any snow that lit upon them melted almost instantly.
How could that be, when the stairs weren't warm?
Delphi's Wonder had a lovely internal insulation using hot water from a spring located somewhere else on Polaris. Inside the walls of the building was warm comfort, where one could explore without fear of hypothermia. Sutai, the mountain, was a harsh and unwelcoming place. The Squire felt as though the mountain did not appreciate her presence. She had the distinct feeling the mountain was testing her, intensifying the wind and piercing cold in an effort to turn her away. So far, it had worked. If it weren't for Delphi's calm support, Sutai would have never set foot on her Wonder at all.
The stairs themselves were intriguing to her - carved with unknown tools, there were no marks of a craftsman upon the eight-pointed stars that decorated the ascension. The eight-pointed star of Polaris, the guiding light on Earth. Such a symbol adorned Sutai's outfit, as well as every other Polaris knight she'd ever seen. It was a symbol of significance and Sutai felt it as familiar as her own mother's face, but had no recollection of seeing it before awakening as a Page.
Did people like Camelot and Sessrumnir have these similar, deja vu sensations when seeing these symbols?
Delphi had mentioned the previous knight of her Wonder in passing conversation. Was there a previous Knight of Sutai? If so, what were they like? The past wasn't something Sutai frequently spoke of when meeting with other Knights. Instead, she was focused on how to strengthen herself, her body, her spirit, so as best to protect the people she cared for.
If there was a Delphi of the past, there must have been a Sutai of the past as well. Princess Polaris spoke of the past, spoke to a relationship with Niflhel that transcended time. Is that why she felt so much love towards the Saturn Knight? Were they in a relationship in the past? Sutai found the idea of past lives to be both fascinating and frightening. Life must have been vastly different than life in Destiny City. Civilizations had spanned across the galaxy if societies had existed on places like Venus and Neptune and Saturn. There must have been important places and people if knights were being reborn here on Earth, each having a Wonder for which they were named.
What was the Knight of Sutai like, in the past? Princess Polaris hadn't mentioned them. Perhaps they never met, or she didn't know? The mountain was an incredibly isolated place, cold and unforgiving. Anandi shivered, wondering if the top of the mountain would be as desolate as the climb. Was her purpose simply to stand on top of the mountain and observe? Is that why she had an item made for discovery and not for combat?
She had entirely too many questions.
There would be no answers if Sutai could not make it to the summit, one way or the other. With this goal in mind, Anandi made the decision to do something she'd never done before. To break new ground, discover new frontiers...
...she was at the mall, in the sporting goods store that was among one of the flagships of this particular mall, knee-deep in the climbing section. The twenty foot walls were adorned with thousand dollar climbing suits, heavy spiked boots and special rubber shoes, clips, hooks, windbreakers and a myriad of other items she couldn't identify without reading their tags.
With other shoppers around, shuffling between the aisles, Anandi couldn't let loose the whine that caught in her throat without risking incredible embarrassment. She frowned intently at a particular red windbreaker jacket, wondering if spending that much money on something so unusual would raise suspicion with her family. Of course, her mother would love nothing more than for Anandi to get more exercise (though her mother probably thought running would be less dangerous than mountain-climbing). How could Anandi spin the tale of suddenly being interesting in bouldering? Sigh.
An associate happened to walk by, name embroidered on his red polo shirt. "Excuse me, miss. Do you need any help?"
The look Anandi gave to him in return gave him a start. She looked simultaneously frightened and incredibly uncomfortable. "Umm... yes, please, I... Some friends, you see..." she tittered, wringing her hands as she stood before the windbreaker jackets organized by size on several clothing racks. "...you see, they invited me... um... to go climbing and I've never really been hiking or climbing before... and they said it could be cold and windy so I should probably have a good jacket but..."
The associate named Kevin (based on his shirt) seemed amused and chuckled. "Yes, safety is very important, especially if you've never been climbing before. Have you considered a good shoe as well? I like to recommend a good, sturdy shoe before anything else. Think about it - if you slip due to inadequate footwear, you could seriously injure yourself. A twisted ankle at best... if you know what I mean."
Anandi nodded with enthusiasm. Sutai's boots didn't have tread, but the stairs were uniform in length, depth and size. Sure, she could slip... but could she even take her boots off? She'd never tried. "Ah... well, my sister, my big sister, she gave me some fluffy boots that I really like, but they don't have a lot of deep tread to them... should I really get new boots if I like these ones so much?"
Kevin seemed to consider this for a moment. "Well... if you like those boots... do you remember the brand? You could always go with some wrap-on cleats if you think ice might be involved. They aren't good for rocks but they're great for snow, ice and mossy surfaces. They're made of a stretchy material you pull over the boot's sole."
"Are they expensive?"
"Oh no, maybe $20? What size shoe do you wear?"
Anandi had to think for a moment. "Oh, um... a ladies' size 6, sir! If they're good for the snow, that would definitely be very good. My friends said they'd like to adventure around in the snow... during the winter! I'd rather not fall if it can be helped."
Kevin gave her a smile. Anandi would give him a sale or two, which was definitely very good for his bottom line. "Okay, good. We'll grab you some of those cleats so you can take them on and off as needed. Now, you had mentioned the wind. Is it just wind you're concerned about, or cold, or both? Your jacket and pants should keep you insulated, but not all jackets will protect you from the wind. Are you looking for something that could double for both? Like a jacket with a removable liner?"
Anandi blinked for a moment. The mountain had both wind and cold, the wind being the worst part. If it was simply a cold place, a heavy coat or jacket would suffice. The wind, however, pierced through even the thickest of material and chilled you to the bone the moment you're exposed to the mountain. "Oh, umm... wind would definitely be the biggest priority, sir. I'd love to have something that could be used for both wind and the cold. It'd rather not have to buy two jackets if I don't need to."
"Excellent!" came a jovial reply. Kevin gestured to another rack of jackets (which, to Anandi, looked identical to the jackets she was currently eyeing). "How's about we check these out? They're on sale right now and there's a coupon in our mailer at the front of the store. Did you happen to grab that? It's 20% off all winter wear now that Spring is in full swing. Now, what size do you think you'd like...?"
Anandi found herself more concerned about color than size. She couldn't help but want to match the rest of the Polaris knights. "Do you have anything in light blue~?"
1,586 words
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