[KNIGHT] Nysa, Knight of Neptune / Howl Wickham

[LizzyMoo]

To my beloved Journal,

It would seem that the consequences from one of my previous endeavors has caught up to me. I have been relocated to Destiny City, and even more specifically, to the Hillworth Grammar School for boys. This place is just dreadful, aesthetically and in atmosphere. Even worse, I am unable to personalize my space according to the rules of this place. I feel as if I am in an uncivilized territory.

I finally unpacked and got everything set up. My desk has only two things on it right now, and I suspect that will be the most that I'm able to have there for now. According to Franz (my new room mate), I am able to have a flower pot out. I need to find some good soil and a place to purchase some seeds. Oh, how I mourn the loss of my garden at home. I do sincerely hope that my mother will tend to my mistress properly. I suppose I can make do with my own miniature garden, in the form of a single plant. It might be the only thing that keeps me sane.

The other object on my desk is my photograph of Amelia. Dear beloved Amelia, how I will miss you. I will miss seeing your lovely face each day. I would say the picture of you that I got framed was enough to make the stay in this prison. However, such would be a dreadful lie. Unfortunately, I have been advised to try and break this bond I have with you. I am starting small, yet I can already tell that this will be a difficult process for my lonely heart. The school's psychologist already gave me an analysis prior to coming to the dormitory. After she found out I had brought a photograph of sweet Amelia, she told me to put it some place where I can see it, but to leave the frame face down. She then told me I have to keep count of how many times I flip the picture up to see Amelia. My heart hurts so much right now. I long to be back with you again, Amelia, my sweetness.

My room mate, Franz, has been quite helpful. He is much more familiar with the rules of this place. He advised me about my jewelry and piercings. It sounds like I will have to make my nose stud as obscure as possible. Of course, Franz asked me about my sexuality, as do many others when they first meet me. I cannot help it if I was raised to be so well mannered. Apparently Franz is a bit of a busy body, being involved in many different activities in the school. He left just a little while for some sort of meeting. Fortunately, he's no ruffian. He doesn't play any sports, but he's a cheerleader. I have to admit, he is quite eccentric.

I suppose I should change out my jewelry so I am a bit more acceptable when I go out. At least Mother had the insight to purchase these tiny plastic piercings prior to my stay here. It is such a pity that I must dull my looks just to ensure I do not cause too many problems in this grim place.

I must note, that my writing seems extremely beautiful with this entry I just wrote. Perhaps my loneliness is just finding a way out and expressing itself in each individual letter that I write.

Sincerely,
Howl Wickham

 

[LizzyMoo]

To my beloved Journal,

The vicious cycle has begun once again. At least it will not anger me, seeing as I have had my fair share of teasing over the years. There are only so many things you can make fun of in regards to a young man of my sort. Being beautiful and effeminate leads to more menstrual cycle jokes than one can imagine. It gets to be quite stale. As the cycle will go, the students will have their fun, learn that the jokes do not really bother me in the slightest, and then find their newest victim to torment.

Most certainly, I believe that Simon Ferris could benefit from such a philosophy. The poor boy perhaps gets the most teasing I have seen since elementary school. It also does not help that he has to deal with Franz on a daily basis with cheerleading practice. I do enjoy Franz's company, but at the same time, he can be a bit overbearing at times. For someone such as Simon, it must be near impossible to handle. One of these days, I would like to maybe take Simon to that café in town and chat with him, maybe get to know him better. He probably would be an interesting person to observe in such a public place.

Speaking of observing people, I think I am making some progress with my situation. I have been counting how many times I have been peering at Amelia's beautiful face. The first week, I was nearing an average of 20 times a day. I do miss her, and it helped make this dismal place seem a bit better. Yet, I have to agree with my therapist. He suggested that I may be using Amelia as a coping mechanism. Instead of dealing with my many situations head on, I am instead focusing on something intangible. The first day he suggested this, I obviously shoved the thought out of my head. However, it really is making more sense now. I am a beautiful man, and instead of being treated like an equal human being, many find my beauty to be a reason for jest. I would like to think I am pretty tolerant about the verbal abuse I take, but maybe all I have been doing is taking my need to be accepted and focusing on someone who was never really within my grasps. I would like to think that Amelia was a girl I fell in love with, but maybe I was wrong all this time.

As of yesterday, I managed to cut the average number of times I looked at Amelia’s picture down to only about 15 times a day. I still have work to do with restraining my desires as well as suppressing the "predator" mentality. As my therapist has said, half of the problem is being able to identify the problem. I would like to move past this mistake I have made so that I can move forward.

Sincerely,
Howl Wickham

 

[LizzyMoo]

To my beloved Journal,

It would seem I am the least active amongst the Hillworth students when it comes to "All Hallow's Eve." I am not a fan of hoarding sweets, nor am I a fan of dressing up like a ninny, so I have decided to spend the evening here in the dormitory. It is not a bad thing to have a bit of quiet time to myself.

My roommate, Franz, seems to have other plans set up for this evening. He has been planning it for weeks it would seem. I have not pressed in regards to what has been planned. More than likely, it is some sort of childish prank worthy of a delinquent. It would seem a majority of the school's population would fit into the "delinquent" category, rather than the "broken home" category. I cannot say that I support my friend's decision to partake in such a childish thing as Halloween pranks, but alas, I am no mother to my friend. I shall not attempt to take such a role during my stay in this facility.

As I mentioned before, I did not ask in regards to his plans. Even after seeing him dress up in camouflage, and even after seeing his new lovely purple shade in hair color, I did not question his motive. I have lived with Franz for long enough to make a sort of guessing game out his strange ways. With him dressing up in such a fashion, it would be either a strange Halloween costume, or a way to avoid being seen. I am leaning towards the second prediction, but I am not certain, since the first prediction is also within my friend's character.

Assuming the second prediction, I would also have to consider what sort of place would he not want to be seen. More than likely, some place he hated. Franz is infamous for having very strong opinions. Knowing such, his motive would more than likely be rooted from some place he has a strong dislike towards. My only prediction would be that he went to Crystal Academy to make some sort of "justice" of his own.

Do I agree with any sort of assumed actions? I cannot say I am fond of the decision, if this is indeed what he has planned for this evening. If it were not for my mistake, I would currently be in a school of a similar caliber. When many a student in Hillworth sighs over how much they dislike Crystal Academy, I cannot help but bite onto my tongue and wait for the conversation to breeze past the subject. I have no issue with the young ladies at Crystal. Indeed, many can seem quite ill-mannered thanks to their high standards, but if a young man matches the high standards, then there really is no issue at all. It all depends on a lad's approach to the situation, and I suspect that a majority of Hillworth students approach the situation in a very poor fashion.

Alas, the dormitory is quite silent at the moment. Perhaps I will head out to practice a bit of fencing before curfew.

Sincerely,
Howl Wickham