A POLL! "Lick My Boots!" BDSM: The Passion, The Lifestyle

Pick your poison.

Top	12.2%	[ 329 ]
Bottom	33.2%	[ 896 ]
Switch	28.3%	[ 763 ]
Gold!	26.4%	[ 712 ]
Total Votes:			[ 2700 ]

[Raspberry Flavored Milk]

Department of Mysteries

Yes, but what if that person was wandering around and happened to pass a park or a school yard or something? I do understand what you mean though. :3

I personally find it's odd that is thought of as an issue. I do get it. You don't want to expose children to things that could negatively impact their childhood - things that are sexual aren't usually seen as children-friendly. However... when it comes to various stages of nudity I just don't get it. I understand it's cultural for us to at least be wearing underwear in public... well, bikinis or shorts, same thing. Children do grow up in nudist communities just fine. I personally would think possibly better because I feel there may be less body issues. What a person wears, or doesn't wear, doesn't really affect children if adults don't start with their hate and prejudices. It's actions that really matter. I guess if someone is walking around naked with a strap-on on or a butt plug in or is openly acting as furniture that there could be an issue. Maybe. Depending on where you are, n****e clamps could look like piercing-like and not be an issue... or just be another accessory. Here that would be the case, though, there may be a bit of nose turning. rofl I never got flack for wearing my collar, I doubt anyone would get flack for wearing n****e clamps here.

[Days of Raine]

Vlad T

Days of Raine

Vlad T

I hate being back in the dating pool.... emotion_8c


>.> So at what point of a relationship does one mention their kinkier interests?

Raine says:





As soon as the relationship gets sexual I bring it up. I'd rather have no sex than sex that I don't enjoy.

My problem is I tend to wait a bit before having sex in a relationship- which could cause awkwardness if the other person is super vanilla like the last person I dated.

Raine says:





Yeah, I've been there. That's why I let them know up front if they're not into that, I'm not interested. No, a relationship isn't all about sex, but neither is wanting a Master either, really.

[S c h a d 3 n f r e u d e]

Vlad T

I hate being back in the dating pool.... emotion_8c


>.> So at what point of a relationship does one mention their kinkier interests?

Beginning. Scare them before you get involved. HAHA!

But truly, beginning. You don't want to get attached to someone who does not share those interests, because then you get stuck. I've been there.

[S c h a d 3 n f r e u d e]

Department of Mysteries

M a l c c h i a t o

@Department of Mysteries: I'm inclined to disagree to a certain extent about the n****e chains. There is a stigma about nudity, and frankly, I think it's ridiculous. Most people don't walk around in public naked, however and if it's a shirtless male wearing chained n****e clamps in public, well, that's his prerogative. If a child is in a situation where someone is completely nude with various gear I think the real problem is why is the child exposed to that, not the other way around.

Yes, but what if that person was wandering around and happened to pass a park or a school yard or something? I do understand what you mean though. :3

I'm more inclined to say that I disagree entirely. I see no reason why children shouldn't see such things. Again, it's perpetuating the idea that what we do is not normal. Children see their parents kiss and sometimes smack each other on the bum. Why should they not see someone being led around on a leash or something more revealing?

I have my own ideas, which is why I'm not going to get too much into it. However, I will say that I started BDSM way before it was legal for me too, and I turned out just fine. Additionally, I was exposed to BDSM-related concepts from as young as two and three years old - hell, I held floggers in my hands at three years old and wore leather when I was four and even younger. I think that people are so caught up in the fact that everyone says that children shouldn't be exposed to it so they prefer to go along with the pack mentality rather than formulating their own opinions and actually witnessing those who HAVE been exposed to it from a young age (which generally end up fine individuals).

Also, let me add that my family had a summer home in a nudist resort. Literally everyone was naked 24/7. So if that's allowed, if children as young as three, four, five are allowed to be in the company of nude adults, why not around BDSM-inclined individuals?

[Leohasgone]

S c h a d 3 n f r e u d e

I'm more inclined to say that I disagree entirely. I see no reason why children shouldn't see such things. Again, it's perpetuating the idea that what we do is not normal. Children see their parents kiss and sometimes smack each other on the bum. Why should they not see someone being led around on a leash or something more revealing?

From a personal standpoint, Leo didn't like seeing her parents kiss when she was little, and she sure as ******** wouldn't have liked seeing fetish s**t when she was little either. Any sort of physical affection beyond hugging as always been weird and kinda horrid to her, and anything she's now used to or even enjoys is a learned behavior from years of social pressure and would have caused her to meltdown when she was little. Just because you were totally cool with something doesn't mean other children won't be really upset. She doesn't think that you should set a standard of behavior with the only guideline being "well I was ok with it." If that's not what you mean, please do correct her.

And as an aside, it's actually against the rules of the thread to say you participated in BDSM whist underage? Uhm, like obviously you can't change that you did but it's kind of illegal? And the mods don't condone that, so talking about it in the thread is kinda not great? sweatdrop

[S c h a d 3 n f r e u d e]

A person cannot change what they did in the past - I am not going to lie to appease the masses. It was relevant to the point of discussion, and remember, this is a discussion thread. I was not condoning anything, I was stating facts - there's a distinct difference.

[Chieftain Twilight]

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

so, guys, been a while since I've been here. glad to be back. ^_^

listen, so I have a new girlfriend, and I was her first boyfriend and lover. and I am VERY not used to "vanilla" relationships, if you will. the only thing we have done so far as kink goes is daddy/Little roleplay.

she is of course interested in the BDSM lifestyle, and is getting curious about my tastes. so we have been talking about things to do as our relationship progresses. I'm trying to ease her into it.

any advice on what are good early low-level kink plays and what are good later higher-level ones? basically, I'm trying to determine what is a good progression from what to what to do.

for example, I'm thinking of doing Sensation Play early on, and I wanna know if sensory deprivation and extremism is too much for a beginner. also, I wanna know for example, when it is good to start with Light Bondage. I was thinking mid-level, if you understand what I mean... of course such things as whipping and flogging would be for later.

speaking of which, any way of knowing how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced before letting her try it out herself? I begin to expect that she'll want to whip me before I whip her.

If you're wanting to start with sensation play i would suggest going with just a blindfold and using wax and feathers to start. Build up to other things like sensory deprivation because if she's not used to it it might freak her out. If she's okay with the blindfold then try adding in loss of hearing or smell, and then finally speech, but I'm sure you know to always be sure to have a safe word/action in place just in case.


As for how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced, just be frank with her. Explain that with no experience she could cause irreparable damage which would ultimately damage the relationship. Use the example of driving. If someone who has never been taught how to drive safely gets behind the wheel they're going to get into an accident and hurt themselves or others.

that sounds like a good way to pose it... thanks. ^_^ I hadn't thought of that one before.

also, interesting idea, using wax so early. I suppose if it's good enough for kids at a ren faire it's good enough for intro to BDSM.

I realy feel like I am gonna be out of the game for a while though, at this rate... I can't help being nervous about introducing someone to this, even if she is interested in trying it.

[Harley Jade Linnea]

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

so, guys, been a while since I've been here. glad to be back. ^_^

listen, so I have a new girlfriend, and I was her first boyfriend and lover. and I am VERY not used to "vanilla" relationships, if you will. the only thing we have done so far as kink goes is daddy/Little roleplay.

she is of course interested in the BDSM lifestyle, and is getting curious about my tastes. so we have been talking about things to do as our relationship progresses. I'm trying to ease her into it.

any advice on what are good early low-level kink plays and what are good later higher-level ones? basically, I'm trying to determine what is a good progression from what to what to do.

for example, I'm thinking of doing Sensation Play early on, and I wanna know if sensory deprivation and extremism is too much for a beginner. also, I wanna know for example, when it is good to start with Light Bondage. I was thinking mid-level, if you understand what I mean... of course such things as whipping and flogging would be for later.

speaking of which, any way of knowing how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced before letting her try it out herself? I begin to expect that she'll want to whip me before I whip her.

If you're wanting to start with sensation play i would suggest going with just a blindfold and using wax and feathers to start. Build up to other things like sensory deprivation because if she's not used to it it might freak her out. If she's okay with the blindfold then try adding in loss of hearing or smell, and then finally speech, but I'm sure you know to always be sure to have a safe word/action in place just in case.


As for how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced, just be frank with her. Explain that with no experience she could cause irreparable damage which would ultimately damage the relationship. Use the example of driving. If someone who has never been taught how to drive safely gets behind the wheel they're going to get into an accident and hurt themselves or others.

that sounds like a good way to pose it... thanks. ^_^ I hadn't thought of that one before.

also, interesting idea, using wax so early. I suppose if it's good enough for kids at a ren faire it's good enough for intro to BDSM.

I realy feel like I am gonna be out of the game for a while though, at this rate... I can't help being nervous about introducing someone to this, even if she is interested in trying it.

I have teenagers and that was the first thing that came to mind, so I'm glad you like the description. If you use a wax that doesn't get too hot, like paraffin, it shouldn't be too scary for her. Its a soothing warmth really. It's understandable to be nervous. You could also have her peek in here too, to give her a bit of an understanding as well. She can ask questions if she has any and I'll at least try to answer them, on this or my main, Chitsa.

[Chieftain Twilight]

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

so, guys, been a while since I've been here. glad to be back. ^_^

listen, so I have a new girlfriend, and I was her first boyfriend and lover. and I am VERY not used to "vanilla" relationships, if you will. the only thing we have done so far as kink goes is daddy/Little roleplay.

she is of course interested in the BDSM lifestyle, and is getting curious about my tastes. so we have been talking about things to do as our relationship progresses. I'm trying to ease her into it.

any advice on what are good early low-level kink plays and what are good later higher-level ones? basically, I'm trying to determine what is a good progression from what to what to do.

for example, I'm thinking of doing Sensation Play early on, and I wanna know if sensory deprivation and extremism is too much for a beginner. also, I wanna know for example, when it is good to start with Light Bondage. I was thinking mid-level, if you understand what I mean... of course such things as whipping and flogging would be for later.

speaking of which, any way of knowing how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced before letting her try it out herself? I begin to expect that she'll want to whip me before I whip her.

If you're wanting to start with sensation play i would suggest going with just a blindfold and using wax and feathers to start. Build up to other things like sensory deprivation because if she's not used to it it might freak her out. If she's okay with the blindfold then try adding in loss of hearing or smell, and then finally speech, but I'm sure you know to always be sure to have a safe word/action in place just in case.


As for how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced, just be frank with her. Explain that with no experience she could cause irreparable damage which would ultimately damage the relationship. Use the example of driving. If someone who has never been taught how to drive safely gets behind the wheel they're going to get into an accident and hurt themselves or others.

that sounds like a good way to pose it... thanks. ^_^ I hadn't thought of that one before.

also, interesting idea, using wax so early. I suppose if it's good enough for kids at a ren faire it's good enough for intro to BDSM.

I realy feel like I am gonna be out of the game for a while though, at this rate... I can't help being nervous about introducing someone to this, even if she is interested in trying it.

I have teenagers and that was the first thing that came to mind, so I'm glad you like the description. If you use a wax that doesn't get too hot, like paraffin, it shouldn't be too scary for her. Its a soothing warmth really. It's understandable to be nervous. You could also have her peek in here too, to give her a bit of an understanding as well. She can ask questions if she has any and I'll at least try to answer them, on this or my main, Chitsa.

I think I'll introduce her to this place. ^_^ she could do to read up, ask questions and get answers. this realy would be my first time bringing someone into the fold. I'm normally faced with peopel who have at least some amount of experience already, even if they are newbies.

[Harley Jade Linnea]

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

so, guys, been a while since I've been here. glad to be back. ^_^

listen, so I have a new girlfriend, and I was her first boyfriend and lover. and I am VERY not used to "vanilla" relationships, if you will. the only thing we have done so far as kink goes is daddy/Little roleplay.

she is of course interested in the BDSM lifestyle, and is getting curious about my tastes. so we have been talking about things to do as our relationship progresses. I'm trying to ease her into it.

any advice on what are good early low-level kink plays and what are good later higher-level ones? basically, I'm trying to determine what is a good progression from what to what to do.

for example, I'm thinking of doing Sensation Play early on, and I wanna know if sensory deprivation and extremism is too much for a beginner. also, I wanna know for example, when it is good to start with Light Bondage. I was thinking mid-level, if you understand what I mean... of course such things as whipping and flogging would be for later.

speaking of which, any way of knowing how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced before letting her try it out herself? I begin to expect that she'll want to whip me before I whip her.

If you're wanting to start with sensation play i would suggest going with just a blindfold and using wax and feathers to start. Build up to other things like sensory deprivation because if she's not used to it it might freak her out. If she's okay with the blindfold then try adding in loss of hearing or smell, and then finally speech, but I'm sure you know to always be sure to have a safe word/action in place just in case.


As for how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced, just be frank with her. Explain that with no experience she could cause irreparable damage which would ultimately damage the relationship. Use the example of driving. If someone who has never been taught how to drive safely gets behind the wheel they're going to get into an accident and hurt themselves or others.

that sounds like a good way to pose it... thanks. ^_^ I hadn't thought of that one before.

also, interesting idea, using wax so early. I suppose if it's good enough for kids at a ren faire it's good enough for intro to BDSM.

I realy feel like I am gonna be out of the game for a while though, at this rate... I can't help being nervous about introducing someone to this, even if she is interested in trying it.

I have teenagers and that was the first thing that came to mind, so I'm glad you like the description. If you use a wax that doesn't get too hot, like paraffin, it shouldn't be too scary for her. Its a soothing warmth really. It's understandable to be nervous. You could also have her peek in here too, to give her a bit of an understanding as well. She can ask questions if she has any and I'll at least try to answer them, on this or my main, Chitsa.

I think I'll introduce her to this place. ^_^ she could do to read up, ask questions and get answers. this realy would be my first time bringing someone into the fold. I'm normally faced with peopel who have at least some amount of experience already, even if they are newbies.

I completely understand. I'm the one who introduced my honey to BDSM. I'd had a bit of experience prior but he didn't have any. It was a slow process but eventually we ended up very much D/s with me submitting to him 24/7.

[Chieftain Twilight]

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

so, guys, been a while since I've been here. glad to be back. ^_^

listen, so I have a new girlfriend, and I was her first boyfriend and lover. and I am VERY not used to "vanilla" relationships, if you will. the only thing we have done so far as kink goes is daddy/Little roleplay.

she is of course interested in the BDSM lifestyle, and is getting curious about my tastes. so we have been talking about things to do as our relationship progresses. I'm trying to ease her into it.

any advice on what are good early low-level kink plays and what are good later higher-level ones? basically, I'm trying to determine what is a good progression from what to what to do.

for example, I'm thinking of doing Sensation Play early on, and I wanna know if sensory deprivation and extremism is too much for a beginner. also, I wanna know for example, when it is good to start with Light Bondage. I was thinking mid-level, if you understand what I mean... of course such things as whipping and flogging would be for later.

speaking of which, any way of knowing how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced before letting her try it out herself? I begin to expect that she'll want to whip me before I whip her.

If you're wanting to start with sensation play i would suggest going with just a blindfold and using wax and feathers to start. Build up to other things like sensory deprivation because if she's not used to it it might freak her out. If she's okay with the blindfold then try adding in loss of hearing or smell, and then finally speech, but I'm sure you know to always be sure to have a safe word/action in place just in case.


As for how to explain the importance of being taught by someone more experienced, just be frank with her. Explain that with no experience she could cause irreparable damage which would ultimately damage the relationship. Use the example of driving. If someone who has never been taught how to drive safely gets behind the wheel they're going to get into an accident and hurt themselves or others.

that sounds like a good way to pose it... thanks. ^_^ I hadn't thought of that one before.

also, interesting idea, using wax so early. I suppose if it's good enough for kids at a ren faire it's good enough for intro to BDSM.

I realy feel like I am gonna be out of the game for a while though, at this rate... I can't help being nervous about introducing someone to this, even if she is interested in trying it.

I have teenagers and that was the first thing that came to mind, so I'm glad you like the description. If you use a wax that doesn't get too hot, like paraffin, it shouldn't be too scary for her. Its a soothing warmth really. It's understandable to be nervous. You could also have her peek in here too, to give her a bit of an understanding as well. She can ask questions if she has any and I'll at least try to answer them, on this or my main, Chitsa.

I think I'll introduce her to this place. ^_^ she could do to read up, ask questions and get answers. this realy would be my first time bringing someone into the fold. I'm normally faced with peopel who have at least some amount of experience already, even if they are newbies.

I completely understand. I'm the one who introduced my honey to BDSM. I'd had a bit of experience prior but he didn't have any. It was a slow process but eventually we ended up very much D/s with me submitting to him 24/7.

it must have been such a bonding experience. ^_^ teaching him how to Dom you must have been challenging. in my experience, the best Doms have always had a background in Submission. I admit that even though I'm a Switch, I sometimes feel most comfortable in the Sub position (which is how I got started).

[Starship Angel]

✮ - ❈ - ✮


Hello fellow...lifestylers?

XD

[Chieftain Twilight]

Starship Angel

✮ - ❈ - ✮


Hello fellow...lifestylers?

XD

hola! ^_^

[Starship Angel]

Chieftain Twilight

hola! ^_^

✮ - ❈ - ✮


Hi there! How are you?

[Harley Jade Linnea]

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

Harley Jade Linnea

Chieftain Twilight

that sounds like a good way to pose it... thanks. ^_^ I hadn't thought of that one before.

also, interesting idea, using wax so early. I suppose if it's good enough for kids at a ren faire it's good enough for intro to BDSM.

I realy feel like I am gonna be out of the game for a while though, at this rate... I can't help being nervous about introducing someone to this, even if she is interested in trying it.

I have teenagers and that was the first thing that came to mind, so I'm glad you like the description. If you use a wax that doesn't get too hot, like paraffin, it shouldn't be too scary for her. Its a soothing warmth really. It's understandable to be nervous. You could also have her peek in here too, to give her a bit of an understanding as well. She can ask questions if she has any and I'll at least try to answer them, on this or my main, Chitsa.

I think I'll introduce her to this place. ^_^ she could do to read up, ask questions and get answers. this realy would be my first time bringing someone into the fold. I'm normally faced with peopel who have at least some amount of experience already, even if they are newbies.

I completely understand. I'm the one who introduced my honey to BDSM. I'd had a bit of experience prior but he didn't have any. It was a slow process but eventually we ended up very much D/s with me submitting to him 24/7.

it must have been such a bonding experience. ^_^ teaching him how to Dom you must have been challenging. in my experience, the best Doms have always had a background in Submission. I admit that even though I'm a Switch, I sometimes feel most comfortable in the Sub position (which is how I got started).

We were both Switches in the beginning, but it was challenging, because I had to be sure to be clear on what I needed, but now he just knows and it makes me all giddy. I don't have to tell him, he even knows if i had a rough day at work and just need a cathartic release he'll take out the paddle and help me to relax.