▃▄The Trans* Umbrella ☂ A Hangout Thread - Contests!

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Woot! Sending request!	45.9%	[ 28 ]
But whyyyyyyy?!	6.6%	[ 4 ]
.G0ldz	47.5%	[ 29 ]
Total Votes:			[ 61 ]

[telempath]

RynDraik

Fall Out Bouy

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-laughs- It's fine. No harm no foul.
I still get called ma'am alot and I try not
to say anything in public because I know
in my case most people just see my
chest and go for the obvious.

Alittle off topic. The pronouns you prefer,
if I misuse or misgender you I apologize
I'm not great with neutral pronouns.

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right. that happens to me too i still get called "miss [birth name]" during family events and it's like noooooooo
thankfully in public it's just my face and i'm able to correct people because my chest is flat as heck and i wear loose fitting shirts

usually when people ask me that, i give examples for getting used to they/them pronouns.
like "They went to the store."
"they're over there with so-and-so"
"they're proud of themself."
"i'm proud of them too"

but if you absolutely cannot use plural pronouns, either think of me as multiple people, or use he/him pronouns

it's alright, as long as you're putting in effort!

[RavenBrighid]

RynDraik

ItsSpikeHere

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Sorry...?
I'm not sure who that is.

☠-------------♡-------------☠

She wrote Drawing Down the Moon, which is a very famous book about Paganism and Witchcraft, and she was a Wiccan High Priest as well as an NPR correspondent. She was a HUGE influence in the Pagan community, an absolute icon. I got to meet her last year and I just heard the news she passed this morning,

[telempath]

ItsSpikeHere

Fall Out Bouy

ItsSpikeHere

Some people struggle with my preferred pronouns. sweatdrop Plus I have a hard time correcting people. Especially if they're gonna sit there and argue with me about it. I do have some friends who use them, and definitely some who have no problem using my preferred pronouns.
I'm doing pretty well, could have been a bit more productive today but all things considered i did ok. it's not completely over yet lol.

yeah i completely understand where you're coming from with that. i still have to go with he/him pronouns when around people i'm not really close to like teachers and classmates.
the main people i'm worried about with my pronouns are people who understand and are open about them, and close friends because i spend more time around them anyways.
i think everyone needs a lazy day now and then, so it's alright that you weren't extremely productive!
i hope you remembered to drink water today!

Yeah sometimes it's too much work to try to explain to certain people. And some people just can't seem to grasp it. Others I think just don't feel they should have to make any effort, but I've learned not to make too big a deal out of pronouns, and focus on more deliberate and more easily-remedied forms of misgendering. Even my own fiancee is new to all this and so I don't give her a hard time about pronouns, but if she calls me "boy" "man" or anything like that I do remind her.

I've been keeping well hydrated, thanks for asking. 3nodding

right!
yeah with my girlfriend she sometimes will be like "look at this boy he's so cute" and i just look at her and say "kid."
because thankfully i'm young enough to still call myself a kid i think
like sometimes people will be like "yes matt you are the deer boy" and i'll just be "im the deer kid"

[RynDraik]

Fall Out Bouy

☠-------------♡-------------☠


Yeah I get it. It's just sometimes if it doesn't
fit right I have a hard time using them.
I can't think of an example at the moment.


☠-------------♡-------------☠

[White Wolf Kain]

ItsSpikeHere

I could learn from you. sweatdrop I really need to figure out what is useful to me and what isn't. I have a hard time letting go of stuff.

I don't like how little I own, i have always done it out of the need to pack up and leave on short notice. (I had a bad habit of running away from my problems) So out of necessity I just started keeping what I own to being able to fit in one giant duffel bag and a carry on. If what I owned was under 50lbs then I was good in case things weren't going the way I wanted them to go.

And I don't recommend that kind of life style, it sucks in all honesty and because of how often I moved around no one wants to hire me (because who wants to hire someone who's longest job held was just under a year?) So Keep what you own, in the end you'll miss having it all.

[telempath]

RynDraik

Fall Out Bouy

☠-------------♡-------------☠


Yeah I get it. It's just sometimes if it doesn't
fit right I have a hard time using them.
I can't think of an example at the moment.


☠-------------♡-------------☠

ooh alright! just try your best and if you can't fit it right then just use he/him!
pretty much as long as they're not she/her i'm alright with them
on rare days i even use it/its pronouns

[RavenBrighid]

White Wolf Kain

ItsSpikeHere

I could learn from you. sweatdrop I really need to figure out what is useful to me and what isn't. I have a hard time letting go of stuff.

I don't like how little I own, i have always done it out of the need to pack up and leave on short notice. (I had a bad habit of running away from my problems) So out of necessity I just started keeping what I own to being able to fit in one giant duffel bag and a carry on. If what I owned was under 50lbs then I was good in case things weren't going the way I wanted them to go.

And I don't recommend that kind of life style, it sucks in all honesty and because of how often I moved around no one wants to hire me (because who wants to hire someone who's longest job held was just under a year?) So Keep what you own, in the end you'll miss having it all.

I mean, I'm trying to find a balance. Getting rid of what doesn't serve me, but also a big piece of it all is just trying to keep things organized. But I understand. I don't exactly want that extreme, but I do want my stuff not to run my life.

[RynDraik]

ItsSpikeHere

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I've honestly never heard of her. Not much
of a surprise though. My family doesn't
really go into the major community, if that
makes sense. Honestly about the only
one I know of by name is Silver Ravenwolf.

☠-------------♡-------------☠

[White Wolf Kain]

ItsSpikeHere

I mean, I'm trying to find a balance. Getting rid of what doesn't serve me, but also a big piece of it all is just trying to keep things organized. But I understand. I don't exactly want that extreme, but I do want my stuff not to run my life.

I get what you mean. Sometimes I wish i had enough stuff to where I could just be like "Yeah, not moving, i own too much crap." lol

[RynDraik]

Fall Out Bouy

☠-------------♡-------------☠


I can definitely do that.
I personally steer clear of it/its because
so many find it to be rude/offensive.

☠-------------♡-------------☠

[RavenBrighid]

Fall Out Bouy

ItsSpikeHere

Fall Out Bouy

ItsSpikeHere

Some people struggle with my preferred pronouns. sweatdrop Plus I have a hard time correcting people. Especially if they're gonna sit there and argue with me about it. I do have some friends who use them, and definitely some who have no problem using my preferred pronouns.
I'm doing pretty well, could have been a bit more productive today but all things considered i did ok. it's not completely over yet lol.

yeah i completely understand where you're coming from with that. i still have to go with he/him pronouns when around people i'm not really close to like teachers and classmates.
the main people i'm worried about with my pronouns are people who understand and are open about them, and close friends because i spend more time around them anyways.
i think everyone needs a lazy day now and then, so it's alright that you weren't extremely productive!
i hope you remembered to drink water today!

Yeah sometimes it's too much work to try to explain to certain people. And some people just can't seem to grasp it. Others I think just don't feel they should have to make any effort, but I've learned not to make too big a deal out of pronouns, and focus on more deliberate and more easily-remedied forms of misgendering. Even my own fiancee is new to all this and so I don't give her a hard time about pronouns, but if she calls me "boy" "man" or anything like that I do remind her.

I've been keeping well hydrated, thanks for asking. 3nodding

right!
yeah with my girlfriend she sometimes will be like "look at this boy he's so cute" and i just look at her and say "kid."
because thankfully i'm young enough to still call myself a kid i think
like sometimes people will be like "yes matt you are the deer boy" and i'll just be "im the deer kid"

Yeah she used to always say "good boy" kind of to mess with me so when she says that I go "I no boy" lol. I mean I wasn't always genderqueer in our relationship so it definitely is something that has taken some getting used to, and some patience on my end. The only "gendered" word im ok with is I have a young daughter and I am her dad. But I explain it as, that has really felt like my role, I was her father, my fiancee was her mother, it has less to do with gender as it does to do with the fact im not the one breastfeeding, who carried her, etc.

[RavenBrighid]

RynDraik

ItsSpikeHere

☠-------------♡-------------☠


I've honestly never heard of her. Not much
of a surprise though. My family doesn't
really go into the major community, if that
makes sense. Honestly about the only
one I know of by name is Silver Ravenwolf.

☠-------------♡-------------☠

Yeah, she is one of the bigger names. Sadly a lot of big name pagans have passed lately :/ I've heard a lot bad about silver ravenwolf, I do have one book of hers and it's....ok. Lacks substance, but a lot of books do tbh.

[telempath]

RynDraik

Fall Out Bouy

☠-------------♡-------------☠


I can definitely do that.
I personally steer clear of it/its because
so many find it to be rude/offensive.

☠-------------♡-------------☠

thank you!
i understand! honestly i only find it offensive if it's said in an offensive manner. like if someone used he/him pronouns and someone in reference to them when "IT went over there" when that person knew the person used he/him pronouns.
i'm fine with them occasionally because sometimes i dont feel like they/them fit even, but it's kind of a personal lack of sense of self thing, so idk

[RavenBrighid]

White Wolf Kain

ItsSpikeHere

I mean, I'm trying to find a balance. Getting rid of what doesn't serve me, but also a big piece of it all is just trying to keep things organized. But I understand. I don't exactly want that extreme, but I do want my stuff not to run my life.

I get what you mean. Sometimes I wish i had enough stuff to where I could just be like "Yeah, not moving, i own too much crap." lol

hahaha yeah pretty much. I think its long overdue that I just be willing to take things and decide trash, donate, or store. that's a common cleaning trick i suppose, to where you have to be sure to actually deal with each item as it comes up.

[RynDraik]

ItsSpikeHere

☠-------------♡-------------☠


Honestly from the few that I've read
she pretty much covers the basics and
our creed. But in my opinion paganism
can be taught and read up on to a
degree, past that it's doing it yourself.

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