Mein Gott!

"Thou shalt do the dance!"

"We are the Knights who say...Ni!"

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ...

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
'Hold my purse.'

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Energizer Bunny arrested,
charged with battery.

A computer once beat
me at chess,
but it was no match for
me at kick boxing.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

The road to success is
always under construction.

My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.