'I'm not sure about this. I mean, do you really want--'
'I don't know.' he cut in.
I sat on my bed, cross-legged, his hand in mine. It was moist, and my hand slipped a bit as I attempted to tighten my grip. His eyes, they were so earnest, so honest. He couldn't tell a lie, because his eyes would simply speak the truth for him. Those chestnut brown eyes that stared deep, and bore through me could eviscerate my soul in two; he knew how to talk to me, how to say he loved me. He knew me all too well.
'Look, honey, I'm not trying to use you. If this isn't the time, we'll be ready when--'
'When it's--' I interjected abruptly. He stopped and smiled a bit at me. We were so in tune with each other. I knew what he was going to say, and he realized that. He had called me honey, which I just seemed to forget in the wake of that moment. It sounded odd to me, that he said the word 'honey'.
He shifted his weight off of the end of the bed, and slid closer towards me.
'I love you. You know, that, don't you? No one ever did for me what you've done. Nobody I've ever dated has made me feel like you have, I'm serious. I tried to rationalize the way I feel about you, but that hasn't happened. I'm not in it for sex, I'm not in it because it's something I want to explore.'
'Well, then, wh...' I mumbled stupidly.
'I want you. You, you as a person, as the best, as the most wonderful person I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. You're just so beautiful, and it's so amazing that nothing other than the goodness in you shines through.'
He smiled his crooked smile, and he brushed his hair back a bit. His hands trailed up my shoulders and my neck, and I let my head fall into them, letting him take control.
He paused, and then proceeded, as he blew a soft, warm stream of air onto my shoulderblades, and he kissed my neck gently. I could feel his lips caressing my skin, and his hands ran through my hair. He knew what do with his hands.
Then, he stopped.
I crooked my neck towards him, and asked, with my eyes, why he had stopped. I didn't dare spoil the silence of the moment.
He just looked at me. His gaze turned glassy and wet, and his lip began to tremble. From the corner of his left eye, a tear fell, and it made its way down his cheek.
He looked down, and covered his face.
'I can't-- I just, it's too much, I can't take it. I don't deserve you, It's... I can't... It's too hard for me to do this. And, It's with you and I love you, and--'
I moved closer, and he let himself fall into my arms. I could feel his tears staining the fabric of my shirt, and I shuddered with a sigh. What he meant by 'it's with you', I had no clue. Is he uncomfortable? Does he think I'm going to lead him through this? It was my first kiss too, but I could understand why he might feel emotional. He had never kissed someone like me before this; This was the first time I had ever been kissed.
I shook his shoulder a bit, and he held my hand as he straightened himself up on the bed.
'Listen,' I said, 'I want this. And, I think you're a really sweet guy, but if you don't think that this feels right, we should stop.'
He sniffed a bit.
'No.'
'No?' I asked. 'No what? You don't want to do this?'
'No... No, I don't want to stop. I want this, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I got a little emotional there, it's just... I thought that...'
'I know.' I said. And I did, I understood what he was trying to say. It was a whole new thing for him, that he could feel this way about me. It was overwhelming.
He reached out for my face, and he held it with the palm of his left hand.
'I meant it. I meant... I meant it when I said that I loved you.'
He stroked my chin with his thumb, and fingered at my earlobe.
'You did?' I asked. 'You really did? Because, if you really did, I want you to look at me. I want you to look me in the eye, and tell me that you love me, and I want you to say my name. If you can do that for me, I'm yours. I'll be yours, and you can have all of me.'
He smiled, and laughed a bit. It was a nervous laugh, and I ignored it, because I wanted to let him say it.
He let his arm drop, and he looked at me, and felt around so he could grip my hand. When he found it, he held it so tight, and I gripped back.
'I love you.' He said. 'David, I love you.'
I looked at his earnest expression. He wasn't lying-- I knew when he lied. He meant this.
I moved close, and embraced his strong body.
'I love you too.' I said. 'I love you so much. That's all there is to it.'
Manage Your Items
- Avatardress up & check your inventory
- Avatar Builderbuild your dream avatar
- Aquariumcreate the perfect fish tank
- Carcustomize your ride for rally
- Housedecorate your gaia house
- Personas (beta)build your Persona
- Sign Up for Gaia News Weeklyproduced by Gaia art community for all Gaia users
Other Stuff
- Mailcheck your private messages
- Friendsconnect with your friends
- Profileedit your profile page
- Journalsyour personal journal/blog
- Achievementssee what you've accomplished
- Account Settingsadjust your preferences
- Gaia Labssee what we're cookin'
- Favoritessee your collections
- Marriageget Married!
- Vlogsee our vlog and Gaians latest creations!
Community Member