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My Last Goodbye
Seconds, minutes, hours, days, nights, weeks, months, years has passed... we separated for awhile now

i know it's gonna be a long journey for you because it's something i never say but please do me a last favor and let go of everything about us, take one final breath and let me go... we cant walk back down this road again because i wont let you suffer with me, i know youre unsure of your feelings but i want to love you until i have nothing left to give

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i already fell in love when i pitted her as he was slowly letting her go, i wanted to be in her life badly even if i end up torturing myself, i saw his flaws everyday and i couldnt even tell her because i was just an outsider, i already knew my luck of being able to be close to her wouldnt last but i didnt care as long as i can make her love me for a split second, im not gonna force her to

one day he lost his mind and changed his heart, because his eyes failed to see the beauty in front of him, his mind was focused on many woman

i thought her heart was limited after that, i barely found out it was her first, shes smart for moving on because giving yourself time alone will open up scars and they say "sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them an extra bullet for their gun because they missed you the first time"

i thought giving her time would allow me to step in, crazy how i thought it was just a few days but for her it has been a month, i'd always knew she would find someone better each time, shes great at that because she'd always knew whats good

idk what she'll feel after this one but i have a feeling she'll start to blame herself and close up her walls, you'll only have so much more until you start to give up and feel empty, youre gonna start to feel "lost" trying to find yourself and you will eventually, that's when you start to find your true love... you will find it troublesome because you know your love is gonna die out and your memories are going to make you worse, love is going to torture you and leave you speechless

i really miss those relationships where you can tell them everything on your mind, write her a surprising long paragraph about her specialty at random times and even staying up late until 12 am competing with each other to say happy anniversary, begging her every night to talk just so i could fall asleep listening to her sleepy voice because she has protective parents, writing her a big o love letter from the heart just so she can smile shyly and hear her say I love you, trying to make her jealous so i could see her reaction, having a stronger and tighter love bond because of that distance, telling her how perfect she is and teasing her till she blushes, and telling her she's adorable when she's mad just to see it angers her even more, i love how she shares all the thoughts

i wanted her to feel the same way as i did, to be as happy as i am just texting her, knowing that i dreamt of her, how i really cant stand a minute waiting or a second because im just that into her, how i would love her endlessly by getting to know more about her beautiful flaws, surprise her how i can remember all the little things, always blaming her purposely so she can give in because i dont play fairly, and she has her ways afterwards, even if we fall asleep talking on the phone, i still want us to stay on the line, i love our late night long talks and i miss everything about you, you little...

so let me be the only one that can love you, let me pick up the broken pieces, let me build you up until you can find someone better, but i promise you... no one can love you better

since you got what you wanted, love until the end because married couples are the skies' gift, i am going to let it all go because who am i to make you change your ways, i dont want to trouble you from letting my stupidity anger you from letting you be with the one you choose, no more going out of my way for you when youre happy with someone else, i'll stay aside like i always have been and i'll watch the world grow old without me

in the end i'll still be the one always happy to get hurt, i'll think about everything you held against me and the little moments that were precious to me when you decided to say your last goodbye, when you meet your first true heartbreak, you'll know how i feel and when that time comes... i know i wont be the one youre thinking of

but who is without a flaw? i loved them all so easily because they were all delicate flowers, if you dont care for them they'll die but i was eager to see it grow that i cared for it too much that it had died, there was so much i couldn't get to say because i thought i would still have time since i was so sure about you, i never wanted to rush and this love that we had... will fade away from my memory because it never came true

i came back to this place and saw the beginning to the end, of how much i gave in just to hear her say "I'm sorry" in return, that all goodbyes were the same, you ended it all and made me realized my path, i wanted to cry my lungs out, my heart didnt cry but tears dripped, this place used to make me feel at ease and now i'll die in the war i wasn't prepared for

the person who gets to love you... will be the luckiest man alive, he's gonna have a good future because he has someone who's flawless, who's pure hearted, who's patient, who have manners, that person is you, you say that im nice and kind because i care for others and will always support them, youre right, i love how you noticed those things about me

our laughs and our love ended down this dying river which will never flow back, it's not that i didnt enjoy our times together or that i stopped or didnt love you, it's because i didnt know how to, you knew that i shouldve known better than to fool around like this that caused us to break away, forgive me for making you think that it was your fault when i wasnt careful enough and lead you towards someone who wouldve been closer to you...

dont worry about me, i'll erase it all, wont write about how we separated, wont say how we didnt get to be, i wont write how i left you, wont ever tell a soul about how we did our dirt, it wont ever end well for me, i took it too seriously and for that i'll take a hit and a shot in this life, i'll declare my defeat because i didnt wore the pants in this relationship

i just came to say goodbye

-If I could give you one thing in life, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, only then would you realize how special you are to me





 
 
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