I want to be a bird. And I'd be an asshole bird, imagine this:
It's Christmas day, you're excited for your presents. Your parents are finally taking a break from their constant arguing and fighting and are enjoying themselves. Overall, it's a pretty relaxing day; the first in months. As you guys are laughing and opening gifts, I am on a hell-bound path to your house. The speed in which I am going is unreal and too fast to be birdly possible. I am flying right to your window. As I am on my way to destroy your glee, I am singing "Wrecking Ball". I am nearing my final destination and think of how much of a great life I've had being the world's biggest bird dick. Then it happens, I smash into your window. Due to the speed I was at, I go through your window and shatter it entirely. Your family is so startled and don't know what to do. Your sibling(s) start to cry and your parents start shouting and this leads into another argument. As this is occurring, I am on the floor, enjoying my final moments. And right before I perish, I whisper, "I came in like a wrecking ball." And then I die.

The End
"You're an Asshole, Mr.Bird" - an original story written by Noah (Me) in Biology.