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 Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:04 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:07 pm
 Welcome to S CORP. S CORP RULES AND REGULATIONS1) Never question your superiors. 2) SECRET projects are not to be discussed outside of the S CORP facilities. 3) Lab Animals/Test Subjects are not to be hand fed under ANY circumstances. 4) If any S CORP employee is acting peculiarly, immediately report him/her to an S CORP superior. 5) If you are feeling under the weather, or exhibit any signs of illness, immediately report to the nearest decontamination kiosk. 6) Interpersonnel relationships are strictly prohibited. 7) Repeat after me, "Santa Claus is coming to town." As a S CORP Employee, the following behavior is expected of you. Any deviation from these rules and regulations will be dealt with accordingly by S CORP Punitive Staff. Have a nice day.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:09 pm
Annoucement to the Elves: Santa is alive and well and will be here for Xmas! Santa Claus is coming to town. Oh yes he is.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:10 pm
Press Release - Santa's Press Conference Dear People of GAIA, The news of Santa's death has been greatly exaggerated. Let me assure you that Santa is alive and well here at the North Pole. While the Barton Link List building was destroyed, Santa made it through the impact without a scratch on him. He truly is a great man! heart The Claus family will soon be pressing charges against Jack for his assault on Santa Claus. We will let you know how that goes. Once again, Santa is alive and well and will be here on Christmas to deliver gifts to all the good boys and girls in all of GAIA. Merry Christmas to all! -Mrs Claus
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:11 pm
Journals of ElfTech 126 Monday, November 14, 2005 :: Sometime after 2am.
today is the day! today is the day!
that's what i told myself all morning. i knew that today was the day to start working at the new place. new toys! new toys! i was so excited, i didn't even sleep a wink last night!
then the people came to pick me up and bring me to the new workshop, and i was so excited, i think i must have blacked out just after i answered the door, because i woke up, and i was already there!
sooo exciting. but, cold. i'm not sure where we actually are... but it's cold. sooo cold. it was the cold that woke me up, as i was riding on some kind of cart into a building of some sort... but, out of the corner of the hat that i was wearing (why was it covering my whole face? oh... probably to save me from the cold!) i saw some snow on the ground.
i like the snow. so much fun. but sooo cold.
cold.
...
ummm. where was i?
oh. yeah. so... my new job. this place is sooo hugemungous! so many rooms. so many little light blinky things on the doors. every time you try the handles (which i think are broken) the little red blinkly lights blink for you!
luckily, they let me keep my sunglasses on, because they have the brightest-est lights ever here. it's was sooo bright, i couldn't see very well, until i remembered to put my sunglasses on. i swear! i'm not wearing them just cause i think i'm cool or something. it's doctor's orders!
the cart-thingy that i woke up on arrived at what seemed like it was time for lunch, just in time for neo-pizza day. i'm not really sure what the neo-pizza was, but it was tasty. and they had lots of yummy ranch dressing... so, that was mostly what i had.
i really wish i knew what time it was, but i think i left my watch at home, on the bedside table, on the little koala. it's such an important watch, it was my great-great granddaddy-elf's, and i'm really sad that i forgot it. maybe if i had gotten some sleep like i should have last night, i wouldn't have blacked out, and remembered it. stressed
anyways... they're taking me now to show me where i'm working. so, i'll have to write more later! sooo much to do!
maybe they'll let us outside to play in the snow later. that would be super fun. hopefully, it's not too cold.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:12 pm
Journal of ElfTech 101 Monday, November 14th, 2005
9:21amThis is all so... unreal. It's like waking up from a dream. You know how sometimes you have dreams of things that are so familiar to you. Like you've done it all before. Then you wake up and it's a new day. But you can't shake that feeling that you've done it before. I think they call it like Jeda Boo or some junk. I think I heard it from Star Wars or something. sweatdrop Anyways, so yeah, my uncle ElfTech062 told me that Santa was recruiting some people to go work on some experimental toys this winter. He said something about Santa wanting to make all the good little boys and girls very happy this year and that it would take a lot of work and effort to get it ready on time for Christmas. Man, that Santa guy is a great man! heart I heard that Santa was in a serious accident last week, but my uncle told me that people were exaggerating. Boy am I glad to hear that! Mr Claus always gives us the most wonderful gifts! I still have my pair of Jolly slippers from before! Something about those little cute cotton balls bouncing at the end of your feet... it's kinda hypnotizing!  But man! I'm so excited about working for the big Claus himself! It's going to be a GREAT Christmas! 3nodding
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:13 pm
Journal of ElfTech 101
Monday, November 14th, 2005
9:36amMy uncle told me that I'd be working for S CORP. Apparently, it's one of Mr Claus' SECRET toy factories! He said it's hidden somewhere in the ARCTIC! Oh and that it's also the TEST FACILITY for all of Santa's new toys and inventions! Boy oh boy! This is so rawk... a SECRET ... ARCTIC ... TEST ... FACILITY! eek HOW COOL IS THAT!? domokun
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:14 pm
Journal of ElfTech 909 *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** Who said making toys is fun. Sure all the little girls and boys will enjoy it, but who enjoys making them. Ya ya, Elves suppose to do what they suppose to do and ontop of that who gets all the glory...Mr. Big Claus. Building the same parts over and over again is not what you call a dream job. I need to make something new to get my Chistmas spirit up again. Maybe I'll talk to ElfTech 247 for a new toy to build...or maybe not. Any hoot, *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H *** *** part C connects to part F then part F connects to part H ***
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:15 pm
Journal of ElfTech 013 Monday, November 14th, 2005
10:30am
Things at the Facility used to be good. We were doing grand things here. But ever since "the incident," I am uneased.
They brought him in, battered and broken. I still can't believe how bad it was! The blood.... oh my god. My hands are still trembling. His heart stopped. I could've sworn it. And then they removed me from the operating room.
And now, Mrs Claus says everything is ok?! What's wrong with everyone?! OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE!!! Something here is not right!!!
We regret to inform you that ElfTech013 is no longer employed at S CORP. He was let go with the last series of layoffs. Please do not attempt to contact him through this address any further. Thank you for your cooperation.
-S CORP
"Making Christmas..."
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:16 pm
Journal of ElfTech 101Monday, November 14th, 2005
11:18amSo I hear the doorbell ring. And when I go to get the door, some guy came down from the ceiling Tom Clancy style behind me and throws a burlap sack over my head! eek Next thing you know, I feel a karate chop to the back of my neck and I'm totally passed out. I wake up in some kind of vehicle and we're on a bumpy road. I can hear the wind howling outside rattling the protective covers on the windows. It's making me kinda scared... crying After about an hour or so, we finally get there! This place is HUMONGOLOID!! eek Man, these guys are secretive! There must've been like a bajillion different key cards swiped and keypads pushed before the large door(which looked like the door on one of those old airplane hangars) opened up. That was ... COOL. :O Sure my butt hurt a little from sitting on the hard metal floor in the transport, but man it was worth it! Inside I could see really large machines turning out little parts for toys everywhere! Probably the BEST THING EVER. mad d I'm then brought to another room where there are rows and rows of cubicles! Sweet. I've never worked in such an official looking place before. I noticed one of the elves, he looked like he was kind of upset... erm, maybe even annoyed. I don't know what his problem was though cause I'd be hecka stoked to work in this place! Then again, he looked like he was assembling something really, really complex-- you know, like putting a cap back on a pen or something. I could never get that right. neutral Anywho, then some guy comes up to me and tells me that my new boss will be some guy named 247. Supposedly, he's at the top of the chain around here! This is soo COOL. Oh man, I'm totally gonna love working at this Secret Arctic Test Facility!! heart
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:18 pm
The Grimoire of ElfTech 571 Monday, November 14th, 2005 11:37amI can't remember the last time I was warm. Well, that's not true, not exactly. But I'm so ashamed to admit it... It was when they wheeled Him into the operating room. The other elves were frantic, we were all terrified He'd die...and then our worst nightmares all came to pass only moments later. It was like having a huge J- (Just hearing that name makes me sick) (okay, I'll write it) -- Jack-in-the-box go off sideways into your stomach...you know, that sick, furious, your-life-just-ended feeling. But as the gurney went by me...It was the blood. A big dollop of His blood...dropped off His hand as it swept by overhead...that valiant hand, fighting Jack, fighting Destiny and Fate, to the very last. It was as if that drop of blood were a flaming match flying into a pile of gasoline-soaked old rag dolls...I couldn't stop it, couldn't stop that feeling of utter hatred and rage... Oh, I know we're supposed to be cheerful and happy but I just feel so EMPTY inside now...except for how much I want to see Jack's head baked into a pie...four and twenty blackbirds I have for you, Jack, baby... Oh, yeah, we're hard at work; making sure a crucial part of the model's missing, or trimming puzzle pieces so they don't fit...coal went out of style years ago, and it's so expensive now... But where is Christmas? And what now will become of us? It's all gone. He's gone. Damn you, Jack. Damn you.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:19 pm
Journal of ElfTech 123 Monday, November 14th, 2005
11:45amWow, INTERNET! I feel dumb not knowing too much about INTERNET. Still feel some sort of guilty looking at INTERNET at work. But this time, I need INTERNET to order la-unch. It is my duty here afterall. Today, we will have pizza from NEO-PIZZA, only the finest pizza in all of Gaia. I hope everyone likes it.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:20 pm
Journal of ElfTech 013Monday, November 14th, 2005
11:57amI've managed to hack into the protected database archives. I knew it. All my worst fears have come true. I need to tell someone... oh god, someone is coming! I'll be caught for sure! What about my family... GOD NO. Julia... and little Nicki! This can't happen... not again... I must warn them before it's too--We regret to inform you that ElfTech013 is no longer employed at S CORP. He was let go with the last series of layoffs. Please do not attempt to contact him through this address any further. Thank you for your cooperation.
-S CORP
"Making Christmas..."
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:21 pm
Journal of ElfTech 404
Monday, November 14th, 2005
12:53pmYou know how there's a Fruit Roll-Up right? Well I created the world's first Vegetable Roll-Up! Brilliant, right? Wrong! It was a complete disaster. Who would have thought kids don't like vegetables? Sigh, the world just isn't ready for something so far ahead of its time . sweatdrop Anyways, it's Christmas here again at S-Corp! Working for the the Big Man is great, I get total freedom to concoct new and exciting flavors at my state of the art lab. Wait till they get their hands on my latest invention, Geoduck flavored cotton candy! It's going to be a huge hit, I'm going to get rich! Besides making toys, I'm a huge Larry Pottar fan. I can't wait to see "Larry Pottar and the Hobbit of Desire" this Friday. I heard some people already have tickets, I'm so jealous! gonk P.S. I hope Santa is ok, I heard he was in some kind of accident. Don't you worry though, us elves are going to make sure this Christmas is the best one ever!
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 10:22 pm
Journal of ElfTech 909Pa rum pum pum pum, who's the new guy? Why do they have to bring in more elves...I hope this doesn't lessen my chance of making new toys. He does seem to be simple minded, but this job is simple minded anyways cry Jingle! It's almost time for lunch. Today is NEO-PIZZA day, my fav. I better get to the lunch room first before the new guy takes my share.
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They call me...
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