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You see it in the papers, watch it on the news and listen to it on the radio. Sexual predators, rape, and murder. We all know that there is a line between consensual and when one person says 'no.' However, as the current and past events prove, there are many who do not.

Now, more than ever, I want to press how important it is to know how to at least get away from danger, and realizing the signs of when it's coming. This isn't limited to a certain vicinity, and the position of wealth in the area will not ensure your safety when walking down the streets.

Always be around at least one person, if possible. Especially when it's nearing dusk, or already is dark out. The more people you're hanging around with, the safer you should be. Even a short 10 minute walk could go wrong, so please remember that.

Despite the fact that you like wearing certain clothing, it can affect if a predator decides to go after you. This isn't always the case, though, as I have learned a long time ago. There are people there desperate enough to go after anything. Be clear on the message your outfit goes out, and how it'll attract attention in where you are going.

Drinking. We're all responsible, but sometimes this issue gets away with us. The more you drink, the harder it is to keep your sense of self. Your mind may say that it can stop any situation, but that doesn't mean your body will listen. Keep within a reasonable amount, and don't let anyone ease you into getting more than you should be able to handle. Being able to handle a drink doesn't just go within if you throw up, but your state of consciousness and ability to make, and stick with, decisions.

When going across a parking lot, don't stop and fumble with your keys. Always get your keys out on the way to the car, and be ready to go inside instantly. Once inside, lock all the doors to avoid someone opening it and pulling you out. While not the most popular of ways that offenders use, it is heard of. If possible, hold off any touch-ups till after you've left and returned home/to a friends/to wherever you're staying.

When getting grabbed, instantly your mind goes into a panic mode. Instincts can save your life. Remember, most offenders wont fight too much with you. It's hard to keep in mind, but no one can grab and keep a hold on your wrist. They grab there, twist the wrist till it's free, pull away and run. If they grab you by the hair, instantly you end up stepping back. Attempt to stomp them in the foot when doing so, and if still not free, elbow them in the gut. They don't want to get hurt, they want an easy target. Once free, don't exact revenge, but run out of there into the most public area possible. Go into the nearest store, even. Just get away, like your mind would want you to. (Remember, this is a reason why Mace was created and sold to people. Just in case situations similar to these occur.)

Sometimes, the person to target you would end up being a surprise. For some, it's a siblings friend, and your in a place believed to be safe. Ease you into a game of some sorts, get more and more liquor into your body, and then they ease their way into a position they want the most. Show some fight, make yourself clear, and maybe that person would leave you alone.

I'm not trying to make anyone paranoid. It's nearing another anniversary on when I've started to become extremely paranoid. There isn't a moment that my heart skips a beat in fear when seeing a white truck go by, thinking it's someone I knew. It's hard to do, and I wish I told my sister and her husband, but if this happens with a sibling's friend who goes after you, then tell them. It may be hard for them to believe you, but if they shrug you off and you stop hanging around, maybe their eyes will open up.

What happened to make me want to warn people? When I was 15, I stayed at my half-sisters place to babysit her sons over the whole summer. A few of her friends came over for the night while the kids were at a sleepover. One of the friends, a guy, started talking. He seemed nice, and I continued on with the conversation. Going down to the basement, we played darts, and he kept urging me into shots of rum. All together, I had about 9 shots, and we went back outside to continue talking. It started with him telling me how to sit, and him kissing my neck. I said stop, he wouldn't. So I did all I could, and punched him in the jaw as he kept kissing me. I went away, and he tried again. Telling him to leave, he at least listened, but then kept going by the house and giving me strange looks from his truck which made me afraid to go out of my sisters house. Despite it being on a different island, I've been afraid that he may come and try again, because of how he acted when last seeing him. As you can see, I avoided most details, but brought up a few things which were mentioned before. Keeping your wits despite having alchohol in your system, and making yourself clear. Right now, my biggest regret is not having told my sister, as she's still friends with him.


If anyone else has any advice, or comments to share on what people could do, please share it. Other comments on thoughts and questions I think should be asked. If I cant answer in any way, then according to statistics, at least one person in this guild should be able to help.

Yeah. Normally I carry a pocketknife that my brother gave me for protection. He doesn't know what happened, but felt I could use at least some kind of protection around me. Big point; With numbers, even if part of them are on a current phone call, you are already considered safer. Always being in immediate communication sets people away.

I agree once again; Clothes don't always made a predator's decision. I was wearing a white sweater with a normal V neck, and baggy jeans with what I said.

I hope you guys out there decide to help and walk with some people a lot more now. After reading about what Oni and I said. That alone will be a saving action, despite you not even relizing it. Oni, I'm glad that they ended up not doing anthing to you then. Really lucky that at that moment you had reception on the phone too.

I was also able to buy some pepper spray (you can get mace too, if you watch a video and get certification to carry it) for about $18. It's a pretty good investment, as it burns when sprayed into the eyes and mouth and virtually incapacitates an attacker (or attackers, as it sprays out in a fan). I would suggest that, barring the usage of a submachine gun, that this would be the best way to down your attackers (and make them temporarily blind so that they can't chase after you).

*huggles Nikolita and Dragon Ladysupreme* No one should have to go through that.

I think we should form a group of secret assassins that any threatened woman can call to "take care of" her would-be attackers. Muahahahaha...

*sigh* you know, I've been reading stories about this kinda s**t in the papers and in books...but never in a million years would i ever think that some ******** would actually try something like that. It sickens me every time i hear about it, and the pain i feel from these people never lessens,either. What makes me even angrier is that these types of incidents are becoming commonplace in every country in the world, especially Japan. In my own story one of my charecters follows these 2 nice looking guys that help her back to their home, only to be gangraped by both of them, at 7 years old. To me, the sad thing about it all is it probably did happen to someone, somewhere out in the world today. I'm stickying this topic to make sure everybody takes note of what happens when s**t like this goes too far

Yeah, but that kind of abuse (which, again, I've experienced personally from a combination of lack of self-worth and a boyfriend who constantly sexually complained and bothered me until I broke down), is a lot harder to talk about because it feels even MORE like it's YOUR fault. I mean, if he is your "boyfriend" it's almost like you've given consent for him to be able to have sex with you....V_v

Sometimes it's not just rape that happens, though. I started this to let people know about how being aware could help them. Not to mention, if you go about talking about the fact that you were raped, or abused, to someone, part of you feels pathetic. 'I could've done this,' or 'I could've noticed and gotten away before they tried to get me.' So telling someone about being raped, despite it being the best of things to do, really could make you feel guilty over what someone else does. In those times, we forget that when it happens, our minds go into panic and it's a lot harder to fight back for yourself. In the end, it's best to do what you can to avoid it happening to others.

With rape and abuse coming from those who you trusted and loved... I agree that it's much harder to bring up. You want to believe that they'll get better on their own, and didn't mean it. The issue stings a lot more. The pain difference would be able to be compared by if your loved one had cheated on you with a stranger, compared to them cheating on you with your own best friend. It hurts a lot more when you can associate yourself with all the people in the situation. So many memories linked to the person; The great, sad, and abuse/rape.

Skire, in a way you're right. Guys don't get attacked like this as much as women. Lately, it's getting a lot more common, and starting when the males are much younger, however. Or if they're of a small build. (Not height so much, but with the buffness.) What's worse is that it's harder for guys to actually report and get the person who attacked them, because of excuses such as battered housewife syndrome, and the huge belief that women wouldn't rape or abuse a guy. Whether younger or older than themselves... So there's an unfair tilt in the justice system that makes it harder for guys to at least get their story out. As for the pepper spray, that's kinda what I figured. So I stick with the mace, pocketknife and cellphone methods. xD

Thanks Koiyuki for stickying. xD I was searching lower, getting confused with where it went.

I am deeply sorry for all of you ladies. You shouldn't have had to go through any of those experiences, but they happen everyday which is really sad and it does sicken me that people just want to forcibly try and have sex with you. Bring a guy, that's never happened to me. But I've been in situations where I was used and it affected the way I felt sexually and emotionally quite a bit. I panicked and I did everything wrong, but it tought me that I need to not let it happen again. And so far I haven't, despite being tempted.

Rape/abuse is something I am against. If I seen a girl being raped, you bet I would go and try to kick some a**. I'm no kung fu master, but I'm 6'3, I know some basic kick boxing, and I can fight. So I would definatrly try and make sure nothing like that happened to anyone because it's horrible. Just downright horrible. Everyone here has my sympathy for their problems. Very saddening...it is for me ladies and gentlemen.

crying