|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 3:54 pm
My father in law was diagnosed with vascular dementia last year and his condition has quickly gotten worse. He suffers greatly from hallucinations and delusions, most of these revolve around my daughter. Mainly she's either in the house or she has cast a spell on him - which he believes is the cause of his problems.
My daughter and her Granddad were best buds, they did so much together - you think of what Grandparents do, he did it and more. Now he doesn't even know who she is.
We've been honest with her and explained exactly what is wrong but it must be upsetting for her to hear an answer phone message asking her to "remove the hex". - I don't listen to it now until she's out of the room.
We have a beautiful place for him to go to and are currently fighting off the social services, they want to have him sectioned to a mental health ward until his room become available. The room won't be ready for another month but we can't let him go into one of those places until then.
He isn't stupid just isn't able to take care of himself, this is a man that is 71 and two years ago was racing his motorbike. He paid for a years internet connection and modem over ten years ago, my first one. He stood in line for one of the first PS2, if dementia hadn't hit him he would have been there getting the PS3 too.
It's incredible hard on us but I can't even imagine how hard it is on my girl. I didn't have grandparents when I grew up so I never had to deal with the loss. I suppose for her it is like grief.
OOF long.
He might not be my Father but I do care greatly for him, I want to know how to help my daughter cope with this situation. Has anyone else had to do the same thing?
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 10:54 pm
I'm so sorry, Deazy. How old is your daughter? My grandmother has dementia. She's currently in a very nice home and it's helped a lot, but most of the time she doesn't know who people are.
It's just so hard, because it's like the person you knew is gone, but they're still alive. I'm wondering if there's a support group in your area or online?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2007 4:16 am
My girl will be ten soon.
The local support group is specifically geared toward carers. We have asked on how to support her and it was to be honest with her about the situation. I don't want her to think she's caused any of it or to get over looked either.
*hugs* It's horrible to see a person go through this, it's like the family is mourning.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 30, 2007 3:15 pm
One way to explain it to her is that his heart still remembers her and is always thinking of her, but then his mind becomes confused and that's why he says the things he does. So when he calls about removing a hex, that just means he still thinks about her and is worried about her. He must really love her if so many of his delusions are about her.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2007 11:09 pm
kim ocean One way to explain it to her is that his heart still remembers her and is always thinking of her, but then his mind becomes confused and that's why he says the things he does. So when he calls about removing a hex, that just means he still thinks about her and is worried about her. He must really love her if so many of his delusions are about her. great explanation kim! razz
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 8:33 am
I lost both of my grandfathers when I was 9, one very suddenly in a car crash and the other due to natural causes. The one that died from natural causes had Alzheimer's, and I remember not understanding why he didn't know my dad or me. I think things would have been easier for me if my dad would have just talked to me honestly about his own feelings. It would have helped me to know that he was hurting, too. And then I would have had someone to talk to about it.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
