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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2007 4:46 pm
Poetry Circle This is a place where you may get your original poetry rated and you can recieve suggestions (together). If you don't want to be rated don't worry, just express this and we won't. Don't be scared, we'll play nice.
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2007 4:48 pm
Damsel in Distress By: Psychotic__GAL “Are you all right, miss?” Lip tremble. Damsel in Distress. No man could resist.
“No.” Careful thoughts. Don’t let them leak Don’t let them show That’s the weakness.
“What is it?” A helpful smile God, he really has no clue. This will all end soon.
“Would you mind terribly…?” A voice caresses A tone, pleading All manners lift.
“What is it?” Lovely. Make him care. Make him give, Tisk tisk.
“I need your help.” Need it indeed This same act again. Delicate? Me?
“Do you now?” Suspects nothing It’s better this way He’ll forget. Unable to pick out. Unable to tell.
“Please…” Almost a whine. Also a lie. Shaking all over. That was the wind. Perhaps excitement blended in. Could he tell?
“Please what, my dear?” A new voice. A new shiver. The air is still. Nothing to blame.
“Help me home?” Uncertainty? In me? Get out of here. Something is different. The mood has changed.
“No.” No. A simple word. Turn. Get away!
“S-sorry to have bothered you.” Polite. Wide eyes. Shaking voice. This is no act of mine. The thoughts broke through.
“Oh look,” The first cries “She’s terrified.” Eyes are sharp Staring into onyx. What a strange hold they have.
“Thought you were going to get him?” The second asked Shake my head No. So wrong.
“Liar” It was a hiss But it hit the air My body turned to run.
“Listen to me.” Cold anger now My wrist is in his hand
“No.” A whisper. My voice is a whisper. Try to pull away. He barks a laugh His grip becomes stronger.
His laugh turns to a growl The heel of my hand connected. Serves him right. A broken nose.
“We were going to spare you.” The first one said. A smile. The same as before. Mocking. Dear God.
They pull me in. Darkness. Screams. Was that mine? Did I scream? Me?
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Posted: Sun Apr 08, 2007 6:19 pm
That was quite interesting. Like portions of a story, fragmented with commentaries. I like it.
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Posted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 12:03 am
Thank you very much!
I like that..."commented with commentaries...". It has a nice ring to it. XD
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Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 7:06 pm
psychotic__Gal Thank you very much! I like that..."commented with commentaries...". It has a nice ring to it. XD Er...it was "fragmented with commentaries"...but thank you?
[bows]
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 3:49 pm
...*laughs embarrased* That's what I meant...I think I was in a hurry when I wrote that...
*bows back*
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Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 8:41 am
Wow -- that was really good! I really like the ending. 3nodding It leaves you with this creepy feeling...
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Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:43 am
thank you so much!!
I agree.
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