Villainy 101: The Fundamentals of Being a Villain

[Darshendros the Eternal]

VILLAINY 101
The Fundamentals of Being a Villain

Introduction: WHAT IS A VILLAIN?

www.dictionary.com

vil‧lain  /ˈvɪlən/ [vil-uhn]
–noun
1. a cruelly malicious person who is involved in or devoted to wickedness or crime; scoundrel.
2. a character in a play, novel, or the like, who constitutes an important evil agency in the plot.
3. villein.

[Origin: 1275–1325; ME vilein, vilain < MF < LL villānus a farm servant. See villa, -an]

—Synonyms 1. knave, rascal, rapscallion, rogue, scamp.

vil‧lein  /ˈvɪlən, -eɪn, vɪˈleɪn/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[vil-uhn, -eyn, vi-leyn]
–noun
a member of a class of partially free persons under the feudal system, who were serfs with respect to their lord but had the rights and privileges of freemen with respect to others.
Also, villain.

[Origin: 1275–1325; ME; see villain]

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.0.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

Every great story involves an antagonist. Without one, the story would be drab and boring, and the heroes would have nothing to do. Heroes need villains in order to have a job and win the favor and recognition of the people they're saving. Otherwise, they're just another average Joe with superpowers.

Tony Montana

What you lookin' at? You all a bunch of ********' assholes. You know why? You don't have the guts to be what you wanna be. You need people like me. You need people like me so you can point your ********' fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." So... What that make you? Good? You're not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie. Me, I don't have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth. Even when I lie. So say good night to the bad guy! Come on. The last time you gonna see a bad guy like this again, let me tell you. Come on. Make way for the bad guy. There's a bad guy comin' through! Better get outta his way!

But what does it take to be a bad guy? Selling drugs and becoming a kingpin is one way, but there are many, many more ways to become a villain.

Throughout this coarse we will identify many of the archetypes of villains, how to be and act like a villain, and how to be successful as a villain. You will learn many of the tricks of the trade, though not all of them. The rest comes with experience. So what does it take to be a villain? Well, if you have evil in your heart, then you have already taken the first step toward becoming a villain.


Essays:

• Lesson #1: Archetypes - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #2: Money is Power - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #3: Hideouts and Secret Identities - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #4: Losing a Battle - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #5: Contacts - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #6: There Are no Innocents - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #7: Tactical Retreat - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #8: Cohorts - by Darshendros
  
• Lesson #9: Life Insurance - by Darshendros
  
• Joke Villains - by JAF
  
• Fallen Heroes - by Kuroiten
  
• Misguided Heroes - by themightyjello
  
• Backstabbing - by themightyjello
  
• Contingency Plans - by Darshendros
  
• Oldies - by Delirium_Butterfly

 

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #1
Embracing the Evil

Everyone has a bit of evil in themselves. It is those who recognize and embrace that evil who begin walking down the path to villainy. Do you find yourself taking pleasure in the mishaps of others? Do you enjoy inflicting harm to innocent creatures just for the fun of it? Do you ever get the urge to take what you want by force, even though you've been told you can't have it? If you said yes to any of these questions, then perhaps it's time you embraced the evil that is inside of you.

There are many archetypes of villains. For the sake of ensuring most, if not all, bases are covered here, we will be using the MMORPG, City of Villains, as our reference for archetypes. Characters from comics, movies, and life will be used as examples of each archetype.

As it stands, there are only five commonly known archetypes.

twisted BRUTE
Brutes believe in using sheer power and overwhelming strength to get what they want. They are usually individuals with incredible physical strength, loads of weaponry, or both. They enjoy destroying anything that can be destroyed and inflicting pain on others, usually dishing out as much as they can take.

The Juggernaut is an example of a brute villain.

twisted CORRUPTOR
Corruptors work behind the scenes to manipulate events into their favor, even if they have to act like a good guy for a while in order to do it. They spread evil wherever they go, be it through selling drugs to kids, or instigating a fight between rival gangs in order to have them kill each other off so he can take over their territories. As their name states, corruptors corrupt the people around them, offering them false hopes or taking advantage of their feelings, influencing them to the ways of evil.

Darth Sidious is an example of a corruptor villain.

twisted DOMINATOR
Dominators want control over everything, through every means necessary. They are typically insane, paranoid, and megalomaniacal, and will stop at nothing until they get everything they want. They micromanage and exert control over everything they own, be it a small corporation or an entire country. If something threatens their hold on power, they usually do not hesitate to eliminate it.

Dr. Doom is an example of a dominator villain.

twisted MASTERMIND
Masterminds are villains that usually carry out their schemes through the work of subordinates under them. They are tacticians, and usually highly intelligent. They are usually disgruntled, ex-military types who know how to lead people expertly and win over their loyalty. They almost never get directly involved in conflicts, since they almost always send somebody else to handle all the dirty work.

The Shredder is an example of a mastermind villain.

twisted STALKER
Stalkers lurk in the shadows, using stealthiness and trickery to carry out their crimes. They are commonly thieves, spies, and assassins, working for either themselves, a corrupt government agency, or the highest bidder, respectively. They usually care only about themselves, and their well-being, over everything else.

Catwoman is an example of a stalker villain.

twisted THE ULTIMATE VILLAIN
The Ultimate Villain shares aspects of all of these archetypes. Usually, for one to be an Ultimate Villain, they must have been a villain for quite a long while, and had their fair share of wins and losses. They know how to pull off the simplest of evil schemes, building up towards something inevitably bigger, usually involving the entire world. They know their enemies, and how to defeat them, or at least hold them at bay until their plans come to completion. Ultimate Villains also rarely ever die at the hands of a hero, and if they ever do, they will always come back in some way, shape, or form.

Magneto is an example of an Ultimate Villain.  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #2
Money is power, and you can never have enough of both.

Any bum on the street can pick up a gun and commit a crime. A real villain will commit a crime and make a profit off of it, if he doesn't get caught. What's the fastest way to make some easy cash? Here are some examples.

arrow Rob a bank.
arrow Rob an armored van transporting cash.
arrow Steal something valuable, then sell it.
arrow Sell drugs.
arrow Marry an old rich person, get put on their will, and inherit their fortune after they die.

Money brings power. You can rent out a hideout, buy weapons of mass destruction, maybe hire a mercenary or two. The more money you have, the more evil you can do. Just look at Bill Gates!

As your gain more power, be careful. You're not the only villain around trying to find a foothold in the life of crime. Other villains will be doing the same things you are, and if you're not careful, they may target you as their next conquest. It is always safe to keep some spare cash hidden away in a secret bank account for those times when you will have to go into hiding.  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #3
Establish a hideout and/or secret identity.

Every villain needs a hideout. Why? Because you don't want the cops breaking down the front door of your house after you just pulled the biggest heist of the century. You want someplace to hide out. Hence the name.

Normally, you want to find someplace that's indistinguishable - an abandoned warehouse, a junkyard garage, an underground cave, a meteor; what have you. The point is, it has to be someplace that the authorities won't think of looking for you. Once you've established yourself a hideout, you can deck it out anyway you please. Just don't draw any attention to yourself while doing so. Never, EVER, have anything delivered to your hideout. Especially pizza. And if you can afford it, have more than one hideout.

Secret identities are optional. Some villains don't care who knows who they really are. Others don't have that option. They may be corporate executives, senators, or mild-mannered reporters, who want to blend in with the ignorant masses during the day so that at night they can go about committing evil acts, and nobody would know the difference. If you do choose to make yourself a secret identity though, don't create a cheesy sounding name, like "Spider-Man" or "Dr. Octopus".  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #4
If at first you don’t succeed, get a bigger gun.

Let's face it, you're not always going to win every battle. You shouldn't let losing hold you back, though. If you're still alive and not locked up somewhere, be very thankful. Use the time you have to lay low for a while, restore your losses, and learn from your mistakes. If you're on the run, however, learn them while your dodging the authorities. If you followed Lesson #3, your best bet would likely be your secret hideout. If your hideout's not so secret, charter a jet and flee the country as soon as possible.

Like winning, however, you won't always get away. Prison time is not as bad as it sounds. You'll get plenty of time to reflect on your mistakes and learn from them, as well as meet other villains like yourself, who no doubt have contacts that you may be interested in knowing. If you're lucky, you may even find an opportunity to break out. If you do, make sure you bring some buddies with you. It's always nice to have people indebted to you, in case you need to call in some favors.

themightyjello

One thing: Just because you're a villain doesn't mean you have to go down. Sure, you're technically not supposed to succeed at accomplishing your evil goal, but that doesn't mean that every time some young upstart tries really hard to defeat you that they will. Even if you'll always come back with some new villainous plot, you're just not a tyrant if you don't mow down a few people before they finally stop you.

You may have to go down eventually, but you don't have to go down like a b***h. Make 'em earn it.

 

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #5
First you get the money, then you get power, then you get the bitches respect.

As mentioned in Lesson #4, you may meet people in prison who know people that you would be interested in knowing. Having contacts is a vital key to a successful career as a villain. Without contacts, you would have to rely on the media to find out what's happening, and most of the time it's a bunch of crap you'd rather not involve yourself with - like wars and politics.

Every villain should have at least one contact. An informant who, for the right price, will tell you what you need to know. Most informants work for multiple people, though, so don't think you should trust any of them with your secrets. Essentially, the people you trust the most are your best contacts. The more contacts you have, the more knowledgable you will be, thus more successful in plotting and pulling off your scheme.

The best way to find a contact is on the streets. If you're known as a badass that nobody should mess with, you'll get the notable street cred due to you, and shady informants will know you're legit. If you're a science geek fresh off the block, with the most on your criminal record being jay-walking, you're going to have a little trouble convincing an informant you're a reliable person to sell information to. Street cred is everything.  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #6
There are no innocents; just people in the wrong place at the wrong time.

This is probably the best part of being a villain. We don't have the restraints that heroes are forced to adhere by. Hell, we don't have any restraints at all. Everyone is fair game, and you shouldn't be afraid to hurt someone just because they're a bystander. One of a hero's most basic weaknesses are bystanders! Take one or several hostage, and they'll hesitate to attack you, giving you the opportunity to attack instead. Always keep an eye on your surroundings. If there's someone standing around, trying to catch a glimpse of the action, and you need something to keep this hero from pummelling you into submission, grab 'em and use them as a shield!

It's not your fault they didn't run away when they had the chance.  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #7
He who runs away, lives to fight another day

You are not a hero, nor are you invincible. If you find yourself in a battle against a hero or two, and you find yourself losing, choke up your pride and RUN AWAY! Better that you run away and lick your wounds from your hideout, rather than in a prison cell for several years.

This is an important strategy in combatting heroes for a first time. Get a small taste of them, and then run away when things start to get hot. The next time you cross paths, you will know what to expect, and know how to defeat that particular hero. Remember this: YOU ARE NOT A HERO, NOR ARE YOU BOUND BY THEIR MORAL RULES! If you've got a hero down on the ground, ready to keel over and pass out, KILL HIM! You don't want to fight him again and again. Make sure they're really dead, too. Many villains seem to have that problem. They'll leave a presumably dead hero laying in a pile of rubble, only to find out the next day that they survived, and they end up having to fight that hero again, only to lose because heroes think the same way combatively.

Don't become another statistic.  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #8
Two heads are always better than one.

There will come times when you're going to need some extra help with an evil scheme, and this will be where your contacts play another important role. If you find yourself allying with another villain, remember this important fact: no matter how good of a relationship the two of you develop, you're only looking out for Number One - yourself.

Villain alliances are rare, but they happen. If driven by a common cause, villains will band and fight together - and they will almost always win. Two villains are better than one. More than two are even better.

You should always treat your allies with the respect they deserve, or at least be courteous enough to them to not draw their ire. Otherwise, the knife you find sticking out of your back will be one of theirs, and your share in the profits will be split amongst the rest of the team. Villains who work well together always succeed very highly. When the s**t hits the fan though, you're on your own.  

[Darshendros the Eternal]

LESSON #9
Invest in life insurance.

One day, you will die. Being a villain, it will likely be at the hands of a hero, a rival, or from a building falling on your head. As stated in the first post, the Ultimate Villain never dies! If you want to achieve that Ultimate status, you're going to need some life insurance. Here are some possible methods to achieving immortality.

arrow Cloning
arrow Become a cyborg
arrow Sleep with a vampire
arrow Have a ritual performed that will make you undead
arrow Sell your soul to a devil prince

Immortality does have it's setbacks, though. Depending on what you turn yourself into - unless you clone yourself - you will likely never enjoy the sensations of living ever again. That's just a small sacrifice to achieve the bigger dream, though!