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 Posted: Sat Aug 12, 2006 7:52 pm
Hey all...I'm just using this forum to post my poems, I'm looking for some opinions...be nice though...I work hard on these. If you want to use them in any way, shape, or form, PM me first.
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Posted: Sat Aug 12, 2006 7:55 pm
Untitled 2
The curve of your hips
Is stuck in my mind
The taste of your lips
So sweet that I find
Myself lost in the thought
Of our next embrace
I see now I'm caught
Without even a chase
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Posted: Sat Aug 12, 2006 9:29 pm
hey, its good. I'd like to see more of your work in the future.
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Posted: Sun Aug 13, 2006 4:26 am
*grins* Short and sweet. Very concise and sharp, quickly getting to the point. Unlike mine, which are abstract for the most part. And usually about a page long, maybe two. I once wrote a four-poem epic that totalled six pages.
So yeah. Each to their own style, but I enjoy your poetry very much. Keep up the good work, friend!
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Posted: Sun Aug 13, 2006 11:58 am
Be
Be music, night,
That her sleep may go
Where angels have their pale tall choirs
Be a hand, sea,
That her dreams may watch
Thy guidesman touching the green flesh of the world
Be a voice, sky,
That her beauties may be counted
And the stars will tilt their quiet faces
Into the mirror of her loveliness
Be a road, earth,
That her walking may take thee
Where the towns of heaven lift their breathing spires
O be a world and a throne, God,
That her living may find its weather
And the souls of ancient bells in a child's book
Shall lead her into Thy wondrous house
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Posted: Sun Aug 13, 2006 12:02 pm
Hey.
I really like your writing style... and your poems!
I hope to read more from you, because these are good smile
~Zena
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 1:02 am
nice poems quick and easy and stay in my mind!
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 11:01 am
Very nice! I really like the imagery in the second poem. Keep it up!
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 4:00 pm
A Wish
I lie on the ground,
and stare into space,
the stars start to move,
into the shape of your face.
I see you there now,
looking down at me,
with that cute little smile,
that I like to see.
You say "close your eyes",
"tell me what you see",
I see only two people,
just you and me.
We're walking the shoreline,
with our feet getting wet,
the horizon turns pink,
as the sun starts to set.
We make love through the night,
on that white sandy shore,
then I hold you while thinking,
I could want nothing more.
Oh I wish I could be,
in that one special place,
as I lie on the ground,
and I stare into space...
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 4:03 pm
The Wanderer
Floating down a river
The sun warming my skin,
The wind going through my hair,
The water lapping over my bare feet and arms,
Whispering ever so softly,
"Come, unite with me! "
Watching the sun set,
Its warmth embracing me,
The afternoon air turning cool,
The red and orange of the sunset
Lights the sky like fire.
"Come, unite with me! "
The night wrapping its love around me,
Shh . . . I am being watched,
Eyes from every corner of the earth,
Yet there's nothing around me,
Nothing but the night.
"Come, unite with me! "
The dark clouds closing around me,
but I am not scared.
Thunder booms,
Lightening strikes,
Sending their warning,
Yet I am not afraid.
The Lord watches over me.
I am the Wanderer.
"Come, unite with me! "
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 5:30 pm
You're pretty good. Keep on writing poems, it's a great way to let out emotions. But you're already real good! Hmm...Just keep up the good work!
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 7:18 pm
Very nice work on your most recent poem.
I've noticed a certain flair about your poetry -- something I can't really put my finger on, however, it's most definitely intriguing, and makes me hope that you write more poetry soon.
As I've said before, I like your writing style. smile
Keep up the good work, and I hope to read more from you soon!
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Posted: Fri Aug 18, 2006 12:18 pm
Summer
Summer is warm and full of life
The birds are singing
The butterflies are dancing
The flowers are talking
The wind is gently blowing
The skies are blue
People are playing
The smell of honeysuckles
is in the air
Boats are floating
Fish are jumping
Kids are splashing
Bees are buzzing for nectarines
The days are longer
The nights are shorter
Summer it is full of life!
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Posted: Fri Aug 18, 2006 1:09 pm
Hmmm. Very nice.
It captures the positive essence of summer.
Keep up the good work ^^!
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Posted: Sun Aug 20, 2006 8:41 am
I am impressed, my friend.
You're the first person I have met whose poetry has matched my own in my mind and heart.
Competition.....friendly-wise of course. You can't really compare one poet to another and say one is better...we all have different styles and we all have different ideas of what makes a "good" poem.
You are truly gifted. As, I feel, am I. We should co-write a song for my band sometime!
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