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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2026 11:10 am
Humming a little as she parked her truck and began to get out, Myth checked her phone once more. She'd arranged with Elaine to swing by while the other woman was home, but circumstances and the usual Destiny City Bullshit had altered those plans somewhat. Elaine had texted, saying that she'd be late, but to go on and use the spare key to get inside. She'd promised to be as quick as she could. Well, it wasn't entirely how Myth liked doing things, but she had the homeowner's permission and knowledge of the location of said key. It would be fine. Going to the passenger side, she opened the door to carefully extract the box holding the casseroles that she'd made. Balancing the box, she used her hip to bump the door shut before heading for the the front door. Elaine had been meticulous in describing where the spare key was kept and Myth beelined for it. Only to find it wasn't there. Okay, not a problem. Maybe Elaine had changed the hidey hole and had forgotten in the moment. Yes. Surely, Myth thought drily. And I'm the ******** Moon Queen. Her mind went into Defcon 1 mode as she reached out a hand to very carefully try the door and found it unlocked. Well, s**t. She hadn't been planning on defending her friend's home from a break in, but here she was. Taking a deep breath, she moved carefully, quietly. Opening the door slowly to avoid any telltale squeaks. Sliding in, she set the box bearing food down where she wouldn't trip on it and made her way further inside. She could hear little movements from whoever else was in there, but it didn't sound very burglary. She held off on powering up for now. If the burglar was violent, she could save that as a backup. Instead, she took a very deep breath, held it and then spoke in a loud-enough, commanding tone. "Don't know who you are or how you found the spare key, but I am giving you two minutes to show yourself and you'd better have a real damn good reason for being here or I will be calling the police. And trust me, the police are gonna be a hell of a lot gentler than the homeowner."
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2026 11:41 am
The answer was immediate, and did not come with any sudden panicked clamor. Instead, there was a pause to all those little movements from the other room, save that of Petitcru trotting out and immediately bestowing on Myth that sort of cringing, nervous welcome to which she was inclined. While she didn't seem especially alarmed, perhaps, given her constant state of existential despair, this indicated nothing.
A second later someone leaned around the edge of Elaine’s bedroom door, and looked at her. This required lifting his eyes from their initial level, and then lifting them some more.
Now, the arrangement was that he was only to use the spare key for dog sitting and for emergencies. And to be fair, he'd obediently taken the dog out before doing anything else. And to him, not having any hot water at his apartment complex for two days definitely counted as an emergency, even if he was sure Elaine would have told him to suck it up and take a cold shower. So he had thought it better to ask forgiveness than permission, and had initially planned on vacating the premises before she could get back, only to find himself, ten minutes into an indulgently long shower (why was her shower so much nicer than his?), considering whether he could wheedle her into feeding him if he stuck around. He had been still considering this, standing at her vanity and absently reading the labels of her perfume while he brushed his teeth, when the abrupt intrusion of a strange voice had nearly made him bite down on his toothbrush in alarm.
Given what Myth knew of Elaine and her habits, maybe it was not so strange for a random Man to be in her house. But it was strange for one to be there without her supervision, and stranger still for it to be this Man, who certainly flew in the face of all her usual types, being neither reedy and academic, nor rugged, not bearish, nor snakey and goth.
He paused in the act of brushing his teeth - a delicate and still-painful exercise - and offered up the best thing he had to a winning smile with a toothbrush in his mouth, at the same moment instinctively reaching up to push his wet hair off his brow and into a more flattering shape. He was wearing Elaine’s fluffy baby blue robe, but at least - and thank God for it - had a pair of pants coming out the bottom.
The smile was boyish, comfortable - the smile of someone who smiled very often - and he gave her a once-over as he offered it up.
He could clear this up immediately. It would be more fun if he didn't.
“She barely even bothers to hide that key. Maybe she likes me so much she'll forgive me the liberty,” he said in an indulgent tone, meandering back through her bedroom towards the bathroom to spit, although he lifted his voice to continue speaking as he went. “What about you? She mentioned some gorgeous six-foot-something friend of hers, but she was pretty clear she was a blonde.”
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2026 12:15 pm
The appearance of the dog went some ways to relieving Myth's feelings. Some. She spared a moment to smile down at the sweet little bundle of nerves and murmur, "Hello, sweet thing. I remembered to bring you a treat too." She might have said more or even gotten down on the floor to try and tempt Petitcru to her had it not been for the appearance of the scrawniest, mousiest looking man she'd even seen emerging from Elaine's room and wearing Elaine's robe. Given that he in no way resembled Nail or any of the multitude of guys that Elaine had gleefully shared pictures of, Myth was reasonably confident that this was not anyone who had a right to be coming out of that room. While she had to admit this stranger had a pretty good smile, she was in no mood to be charmed. Keeping her expression impassive as the guy smiled at her, Myth merely arched an eyebrow. She could convey entire thoughts with those eyebrows and she took enormous pride in that skill. And in this instance, that thought was 'I am unconvinced, try again.' And when she spoke, her voice was smooth and icy as she casually pulled her phone out. "Funny. Her instructions on where to find it were fairly detailed. Certainly not the work of someone who barely bothers. Shall we try that again or do you really want to be bundled into a police cruiser wearing a baby blue robe? Or, perhaps I can call her up and let you say hi. Though I have to warn you, she might be out of sorts since one of the mini-skirted weirdoes seems to have flung a car across the road and gotten her stuck in traffic." Only now did Myth smile, a serene expression that managed to convey that she'd be there with popcorn if he chose the Elaine option. Because, while he might have some permission to be here, she didn't think her friend had extended bathrobe rights.
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2026 1:08 pm
He had been going to change his clothes, but the notion of being arrested in a bathrobe striking him as entertaining, he opted instead - after leisurely availing himself of Elaine’s mouthwash - to saunter back out as he was.
“You say it like I would feel my masculinity was threatened by having a mugshot in a fluffy bathrobe,” he said, with affected gravity. “My clearly very fragile masculinity.” He said this with a hand pressed to his chest, which was not only manicured but had some kind of teeny tiny nail art rendered on each finger. “But worrying about her wrath is another story. Avert your eyes,” he finished with another relentlessly cheerful smile, shedding the robe to hang it on the back of one of the barstools before reaching down and scooping up Petitcru on his way to flop down on the sofa. He was not overly fond of dogs, but he and Petitcru had an Understanding, fostered during the Time of Pain Medication. He was pretty sure she looked upon him as a big warm immobile pillow.
Odfly, being shirtless did not make him look even scrawnier, and in fact seemed to suggest that he merely broadcast an aura of scrawniness as some sort of passive effect. Not because he'd been concealing some sort of sleeper build, but because his body occupied that strange place that some almost-skinny men's bodies do, wherein they are simultaneously flabby and ribby, with lean arms but a collarbone a little too soft.
“Maybe she was talking about you after all. She mentioned a disciplinarian type. But like attracts like, and all that.” He glanced up to give her another scrutinizing look from where he was arranging himself on the couch with Petitcru in his arms. “Are you Princess? Also, that smells ******** amazing,” he added, gesturing with his elbow at the food. “Did you make whatever that is?”
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2026 2:19 pm
Hmmm. Petitcru had allowed herself to be scooped up and seemed fairly comfortable with the guy. Or as comfortable as a tiny, shaky dog ever got. Point in his favor. Maintaining her serene exterior, Myth crossed her arms and averted her eyes as requested. "I was thinking more sparing your dignity, actually. Your masculinity, fragile or otherwise, wasnt really a factor. Destiny City's finest are not exactly bastions of empathy and understanding, you know."
The fact that he'd changed out of the robe upon invoking Elaine's displeasure also nudged him up a few millimeters in Myth's eyes. Or rather, it gave weight to the idea he knew her. Taking a moment to study him now that he wasn't obscured by fluffy blue, Myth found herself frowning slightly. What was it about the skinnyass ones that made them look so unwell? Though... she wondered if he wasn't carrying himself to exaggerate his meek and mild appearance. There were hints of muscle there. Curious. Very curious.
Though she thought he was being entirely too cavalier about Elaine's home.
"People are allowed to have multiple friends of similar heights," she said. "And if that's your way of trying to find out if I punish bad boys in my spare time, I'm sorry to disappoint." Okay, she wasn't actually. But it was probably nicer to say that than to start laughing hysterically in his face. She watched as man and dog settled and was forced to admit, if only to herself, that Petitcru would not act like that if she didnt know and trust him. Fine. Maybe he wasn't really a burglar. But she still didn't like his attitude. Though, her mouth quirked in a faint smile as he turned his attention to the food she'd brought.
"I did, indeed. For Elaine," she said, faintly stressing her friend's name before adding, "and Petitcru."
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2026 5:25 pm
“No disappointment here. Never did go in for the punishment angle myself, which is probably why she doesn't like me much,” he said, settling back at his leisure in the corner of the sofa with his knees drawn up. This comment, at least, seemed to confirm that he was no longer trying to convey that he was here for any of the reasons a man might normally be here. “Then again,” he lied, mildly in tone if not in scale, “I've never been a bad boy a day in my life, either.”
Having settled the dog - which he was perhaps treating as a bit of a shield - he was able to gesture at the other end of the couch as if inviting her to sit, although the barstools were right there too. “Well. She's been giving me her leftovers, so I look forward to enjoying whatever she can't get to. Thank you in advance, I'm sure it's great. What is it?” He added, nosy. “She's got a lot of friends who bring her food.”
And she, also, brought a lot of her friends food, even if it was more usually in styrofoam takeout clamshells and little paper bakery boxes than in any kind of home cooking container. Or maybe she was bringing them leftovers, if this obnoxiously amiable a*****e counted as a friend.
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Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2026 10:33 am
Maintaining her position, the only standing down Myth allowed herself was to lean casually against the wall, arms crossed as she kept a distrustful eye on the guy. She snorted in amusement at his assessment of why Elaine probably didn’t like him much, since she had her own opinions on why he wasn’t terribly likeable. Granted, her own reasons were more along the lines of feeling highly offended by his cavalier manner and assumption that what was Elaine’s was also, somehow, his. Plus she was annoyed with herself for finding him mildly entertaining. Regardless, she had zero intention of leaving before Elaine got home. And entertaining or not, she was experienced enough with people to recognize Bullshitting. And while this guy might not be trying to sell her worthless tat that had been dolled up to pass for ‘antique’, he was still trying to sell her a narrative of sorts. And it was making the idea of powering up and bopping him over the head with her spear immensely tempting. She’d behave, of course. But she was Tempted. In an effort to keep her temper, she decided to, for now, answer his questions as simply and non-commitally as possible. “Turkey enchilada casserole, Frito Pie and a cassoulet. I mixed the leftover turkey up with some fruit and veg for Petitcru. Glad you like the smell, but it ain’t Elaine’s until the lady herself takes possession.” This was said very mildly, almost distractedly. There would be no circumvention of this rule while she was here. She paused, appearing to stare blankly up at the ceiling for a moment before continuing in that same casually distracted voice, “I don’t like dishonesty and I feel like you’ve been nothing but since you popped out of Elaine’s room. What I can’t quite figure out is if it’s malicious or you’re just terribly twee and think it's funny. So,” she paused to bring her gaze down to him, just barely arching an eyebrow. “Which is it? Keeping in mind that I can quite clearly see that Petitcru knows and likes you. Which means that Elaine also knows you and doubtless shared the location of the spare key with you. Which, in turn, means that she also seems to trust you to a point.” Myth straightened for a moment, stretching out her arms and back, feeling the vertebrae popping back into alignment and sighing in content. Settling back against the wall, she tilted her head, waiting to see if he would continue to deflect and sass or actually be straight. “Maybe I just want to be sure that you’re not trying to exploit my friend or disrespect her or her home on purpose. I might,” she added on with the barest of smiles, “even see my way clear to feeding your scrawny butt if you can be honest for five minutes.”
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Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2026 10:57 am
“Oh, I'm terribly twee and I do think it's funny. Not like slapping your knee funny, but mildly entertaining. Somewhere right below sensible chuckle funny.”
He began absently running his fingers through his hair, pushing it back and arranging it without the benefit of a mirror into something that would be less than a mop when it dried. “I could make the argument that she might be just as likely to be pissed that you interrogated a house guest who's also her dogsitter,” he continued cheerfully, “except I know she always takes a woman's side.” As if she needed more proof that he knew Elaine. “She told me I could use the key if I needed it. My landlord is dragging his feet on fixing the hot water and while I'm sure she has Thoughts about it, look me in the eye and tell me she'd be willing to suck it up and take cold showers in the same situation. She says she hates a hypocrite. I'm doing her conscience a favor.”
He said something, then, by way of explanation, which had a significance for Myth that he could not possibly have fathomed. “I'm another one of her stray dogs,” he said.
Like Petitcru. Like Nail, as she had once described him. In a way, like the whole of Destiny City had become to her, when she was Joy. Some hapless and helpless burden thrust on her, which she was protecting - and maybe growing fond of - against her will.
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Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2026 11:42 am
Listening carefully, Myth nodded, her smile growing more evident the more he spoke. Now this all had the ring of honesty. She even laughed without reservation at his little riposte. “No doubt, you could make that argument, but I’m sure we both know that she would have warned me that you were here if she’d known just so I wouldn’t be startled. Can’t blame me for wanting to be sure that me and my friend are actually safe.” She let that point go and continued to listen, nodding in sympathy and wincing at his hot water situation. She was so damned happy she didn’t have to deal with shitty landlords! Well, at least as far as her home was concerned. Her landlord for the shop was pretty great all things considered. “Well s**t, that’s rough. How long they been dragging their feet? And seriously? We both know she’d do it at least once to prove a point. Or at least try.” She was proud of herself for not reacting visibly to the stray dog remark, but on the inside she winced. She recalled very well how Joy had slapped that label on Nail. And Petitcru. And how bitter she’d sounded doing so. But Myth knew she loved Petitcru and in some way seemed to care for Nail. Okay then. She had her mental bearings now and a better idea of how to proceed. Nodding in satisfaction, she jerked her head towards the box of food before pointing imperiously in the direction of the kitchen. “All right, Rover,” she said drily. “Go find a couple of plates and some utensils and get ‘em on the table. And while you’re doing that, give me some more info on this landlord of yours because I can promise you that this foot dragging is shady as ******** if not outright illegal and I can’t help if i don’t have intel.” She hefted the box and lugged it into the kitchen, setting it down on the counter. She felt a little odd about dishing up food when Elaine wasn’t here, but as she’d already told the guy, the food wasn’t Elaine’s until she handed it over. “Elaine gets first dibs at the cassoulet, but I don’t see any reason you can’t try the frito pie and enchiladas,” she said as she unpacked the box efficiently and put one of the big dishes into the oven to keep warm. Taking the covers off the others, she found a serving spoon and dished up generous servings of each before setting it on the table. The smaller dish of food for Petitcru was also set into the oven. “Sorry, sweet girl,” she cooed. “But I am not risking your momma’s wrath by feeding you out of turn.” Reaching for one of the chairs, she pulled it out before dropping gracelessly into it and grinning. “Well? Eat! And be sure to say plenty of nice things about the food.”
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Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2026 5:13 pm
He more or less ignored her instructions, being a man whose reaction to Bossy People was generally to indulge them with his patient silence and let them get all their directorial urges out without his input - at least unless that person was Elaine reminding him how much money he owed her. His initial thought of using "can't move, dog on me" as an excuse passed, however, in favor of speeding up the process of eating something that wasn't microwaved cup noodle. He instead meandered back into Elaine's bedroom as she talked, re-emerging in the act of putting on a sweater (Ralph Lauren, vintage; not the sort of thing typically being worn by someone who was unable to get hot water to his shitty apartment, but worn to a soft and evident age) and taking his sweet time pulling out dishes, mainly because he made a stop by the fridge to see if she had any drinks worth stealing. She did not. "You really are a disciplinarian. It's cute how you think you can negotiate with a slum lord," he said amiably, settling into the other seat and picking up a fork. It always was, when people thought this was something you could simply sail into with a list of legal codes in hand and get results. "I'd rather talk about food than the landholding classes. What kind of praise are you after?" he asked, with a show of mock obedience as he negotiated a bite, still habitually forgetting that he no longer had to treat one side of his mouth like a pain minefield. "So I can be sure and hit all the highlights."
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Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2026 6:57 pm
"Who said I was gonna go after the b*****d," she asked with a hint of knife edge to her voice. "I was planning on getting information and passing it on to my landlord, who is a charming battleaxe of a woman, and turning her loose. She likes me. She likes my shop. And she has a healthy knowledge of various laws along with some connections. But, I mean, if you wanna keep going without hot water, who am I to stand in the way of those wishes?"
She hadn't missed the slow movements and managed to restrain herself to an eyeroll. Dude had already admitted to thinking his nonsense was funny. She'd let him hold on to that as long as he didn't try to outright troll her. Glancing at her phone, she checked the timestamp on the last text and did some mental calculations. She knew the area and roughly how long it could take to clean s**t up and reroute traffic. It would be reasonable to expect Elaine at any time. Armed with that logic, she got another plate out and set a place for her friend. As she worked, she snorted again, and shot a glance at Elaine's latest stray. "Well, I'd prefer polite honesty. But I also tend to be a fan of speaking plainly and not trying to needle the hands that feed me. So... let's try for constructive criticism? Is there too much salt? Not enough? Does the turkey work with the verde sauce or would rojo have been better? Its fairly hard to ******** up Frito Pie so I'm pretty confident in that one."
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Posted: Tue Jan 27, 2026 4:06 pm
He let the talk of slumlords go, engaged instead in navigating the first real food he'd had in quite a while that wasn't lukewarm from a packet or blended into a cup or both. He closed his eyes, and was willing to let this pass as an expression of indulgent enjoyment rather than the attempt - which it was - to wall off a bit of her presence for a second. Kay liked just about everyone who didn't give him a reason not to - and he was already going to like Myth anyway, for feeding him - but Elaine was a powerful enough presence on her own before introducing another brisk disciplinarian into the mix. It was a heady concoction to get two swigs of back to back, and he was anticipating a third when Elaine herself showed up at any moment. He wondered, not for the first time, exactly how Mel fit into this little social circle - whether she knew Myth as well - and whether she found it more pleasant than he did to be benevolently bossed around. "Haven't eaten anything hot that didn't come out of a microwave in like a week," he said at last, taking a second bite without opening his eyes, "so I'm in the worst possible position to be a critic." He was feeling a bit emotional. Mel's cake seemed like a long time ago, all of a sudden. He'd rationed those orange slices for days. She'd probably appreciate knowing that the sugar had been a constant source of pain every time he indulged hard enough to forget to chew on only one side of his mouth. "Needs some lime," he suggested amiably. "But what doesn't?"
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Posted: Sun Feb 08, 2026 12:15 pm
"Lime," Myth repeated, making a mental note. "Well, I can try it, but lime is one of those flavors that either hits just right or you're tasting it for months after." She watched him eat, eyes narrowing in something approaching satisfaction. And quite a bit of thought. She did enjoy cooking now and then. And it was always pleasant to have her efforts appreciated. Fortunately, dude had his eyes closed, so was unlikely to notice her sharp, speculative glance. Though she was careful to keep her voice completely cheerful when she said, "Oh, anyone can be a critic, my friend. It one of life's joys." Sighing, she sat in one of the other chairs and wondered how Elaine had stumbled across this guy. She considered asking, but decided that she didn't particularly want answers filled with sass. Instead, she decided to talk food. It was a safe enough subject. "How do you feel about things like tamales? Or black bean soup? It's all stuff that's easy enough to reheat, though I can say with confidence that my food tastes a lot better than the typical microwaveable crap."
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Posted: Mon Feb 09, 2026 7:07 am
Not catching the drift of her question, he wrinkled his forehead expressively between bites. "Better off asking Elaine, surely," he demurred, "since she's the one getting dibs. Usually," he corrected himself, aware that he was, in fact, getting dibs even as they spoke. "But if you're asking what I like so that I can get more pleasure from her leftovers..." He paused, considering the question around another slowly indulgent mouthful. "I know what they say about beggars and choosing," he said at last, "but do you know what I want that you can't just go pick up at a restaurant unless you're happy with it being watery and s**t? I want," he said, with that sort of expansive gesture that indicated that he was indulging in something akin to an unrealistic fantasy, "a big ******** pot of chili, with all the stuff you put on top. And a cinnamon roll," he added for good measure.
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Posted: Mon Feb 09, 2026 1:52 pm
Myth allowed him a few more moments to eat, which he certainly appeared to be enjoying. She nobly refrained from pointing out that yes, she could ask Elaine, but was asking him instead. He’d get there eventually. Instead, she allowed a tiny amused smile to play about her lips as she listened to his big wish, given with all the gusto of someone asking for a unicorn for their birthday. And if her grin got wider as she listened, surely no one would blame her. “Chili, huh,” she asked, voice carefully controlled so as to not give the game away. “Yeah, I gotta be real, it’s pretty hard to find a decent batch around these parts. I gotta ask though, beans or no beans? To hear some people talk, either answer can be correct or the worst blasphemy ever.” She was already tallying up ingredients in her head, chili was easy. She loved making it and experimenting. So, chili and all the toppings? Absolute cake. She’d even toss in a pan of corn bread to go with it. But a cinnamon roll? With chili?!? “Follow up question. How exactly does the cinnamon roll fit into this chili chat? I mean, my pastry skills aren’t the best, so you’d be ending up with the Pillsbury variety, but I’m curious.” She was already back in Calculation Land. If he was a No Beans boy, then she’d need to add some peanut butter to help thicken things up. Did she still have cumin at home? She couldn’t remember. Oh! And another packet of Sazón. Wait, wait wait. “Further follow up. How big a ******** pot are we talking here? And any food allergies that I might need to know about? Be a hell of a thing to cook for you and end up hospitalizing you. Elaine would be miffed to say the least.” Or maybe she wouldn’t. Myth had no way of knowing the precise nature of the relationship between these two. But Petitcru seemed to like the guy. And she’d hate to accidentally poison someone the shaky little dog liked.
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