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[Q] Bellerophon Dark Mirror Senshi of Chimera

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SSBrosB


Springtime Noob

PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2020 5:37 am


Powered form of Clue

Senshi: Bellerophon (more here and there) Dark Mirror Senshi of Chimera (mythological creature, not genetics)

Challenge: “… what?”

Fuku Colour: Black
Main Color: #c44708
Secondary Color: #190207

Fuku:

Collar -- CC
Bow -- Sash, but looking like a snake/dragon wrapped around his body instead of just a plain sash, or a sash with a snake/scale pattern on it
Bodice -- CC
Sleeves -- CC
Brooch -- The head of a lion with goat horns
Bottoms -- Shorts, CC
Tiara -- CC except I would like for it to have goat horns on it
Choker -- CC
Shoes -- CC
Gloves -- Yes, CC
Accessories -- Anything that would make him look more like the Dark Mirror Senshi of Chimera. I’d really like to emphasize it.

Ref (to get an idea):
one
one
three
four
five


Attacks: These are your senshi's abilities, which will be used in battle. These abilities correspond to your senshi's element. Think of it as a "summary" of what your senshi can do in one word.

Sailor Scout Attack: Breath of Fire!
Bellerophon says the attack and as he does so he can feel his mouth getting hotter. The next time he opens it, he lets out a breath of flame! This can last up to 15 seconds (depending on if he wants it to) and reach about 3 feet. Can be used 3 times. Doesn’t hurt him but can make his enemies feel as though they are on fire (they may choose how they feel it, such as fully or just a part of them and they have to brush it off/roll to get it off but they can feel it). May still feel warm a few hours afterwards (up to the player)

Super Sailor Scout Attack: Fire shout!
Bellerophon says the attack and can feel his mouth getting hot. When he opens it again he lets out a long stream of fire, this time reaching up to 5 feet and lasting 10 seconds. Can only be used twice. The enemy may feel the sensation of moderate to extreme burns (up to the player, but they can also choose to have lasting damage if the player wants it!). They may feel as though they have a fever for up to 12 hours (if the player chooses).

Eternal Sailor Attack: Triple Chimera strike!
Bellerophon calls out his attack and when he does the ethereal forms of a lion, goat, and large snake form and he can attack with any of them, however it will be random as to which one attacks ((1, 2, 3 dice roll will be used for this when he launches it)).
*Roll 1 - Summon Snake to attack target. The bite will poison the enemy for 45 seconds. When bitten, the area that has been poisoned will feel heavy/numb and tingly, and the limb will be more difficult to use. The player may choose to have this limb be completely unusable if they would like.
*Roll 2 - Summon Lion to attack target. The lion attacks the target with their claws, swiping at the target to cause the sensation of bleeding. Though visually different, this attack continues to poison the enemy for 45 seconds. Upon contact the poisoned individual will feel heavy/numb and tingly, and the limb will be more difficult to use. The player may choose to have this limb be completely unusable if they would like.
*Roll 3 - Summon Goat to attack the target. The goat will charge towards the target and headbutt them. The horns may leave scratches along affected limbs and imbue the target with poison that lasts for 45 seconds. Once struck, the poisoned area ill feel heavy/numb and tingly. This limb will be more difficult to use for the duration of this attack and the player may choose to have this limb be completely unusable if they would like; they may also choose to be winded by the headbutt as well.
This can be used once.

Enhancement (for later): Bellerophon summons the vision of a true Chimera around himself or his ally. While this ethereal beast is present, the target will be protected from any magical or physical attack that may come their way for a duration of 25 seconds. If more than one person attacks this Chimera it will disappear more quickly and Bellerophon or his ally will become vulnerable.
PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2020 11:16 am


SSBrosB


Hi Bros it's me again, your friendly neighbourhood dork!

About Bellophoron - Your References
Believe it or not you've got two different types of Astral Body in your link and two of them are for a different thing. It turns out your research was better than mine in that you have found the correct Bellorophon (it's an asteroid) and I did a little more digging for you based on your own links!

I had concerns after asking if you could use the "nickname" if this would be allowed and I'm delighted to see that there is a Bellophoron that you can use, we just need to swap your resources around and we don't have to ask you to use Dimidium! n_n

Can you update the references in your Senshi Sphere link for me?

Senshi Powers
Just need a tiny bit more detail from you for these.
    Basic/Super Abilities
    Can you give me a little more detail on what happens if the opponent is hit by his breath/shout? The duration and range are fine, I just need to make sure that the 'damage' of the attack makes sense and isn't too strong. n_n

    Eternal Attack
    Since the heads have separate functions can you just run through the type of damage these can do for me, the duration they can stay out for and how much damage they might be able to absorb in the case of the snake (as an example). It's not common to see both an offensive and defensive ability in one attack so this is just another sense check to make sure that it's not too strong against any of the poor Negas he may end up facing!


Due to the complexity of the DMC in some instances I'm not too concerned about his appearance. You've left chunks of this up to the colourist so they'll make sure it suits!

That's the only things I needed to check up on for you at the moment so if you want to fix your links and walk me through some of my questions over his powers that would be great. n_n

Epine de Rose



SSBrosB


Springtime Noob

PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2020 3:43 pm


Epine de Rose
It has been edited!
PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2020 10:48 am


SSBrosB


Okiedokie!

So I've had a look and unfortunately, while the powers all sound low-key awesome, they're a little too powerful for any senshi to have in the shop. I didn't want to come back right away until I'd had time to sit down and look at them as I wanted to see if we could keep the overall feel without them being too strong.

I've got a few little suggestions for you below to consider and you can choose how to proceed with them - if you don't like them, that's ok, you're free to rewrite your powers as you would like!

Basic Attack:
  • Overall this is okay for both range and duration.
  • In terms of damage it's vague, which means we just need to add in a couple more little details.
  • For the "feel like they're on fire", you can add in something along the lines of "it is up to the player to decide how warm they feel", this means that they can either feel like they're completely covered if they like, or they may be at the point where they can stop/drop/roll and put it out but they'll still feel it and it'll still hurt! I know that might sound a little silly, but depending on your RP partner they may like the added detail to see how far they can go without misunderstanding your ability.
  • For the "May still feel warm for a few hours after" - this is generally ok, you can leave this as is if you're adding in the above to let the player decide how hot they are.
  • Normally once the duration of an attack is 'done' it means that all the magic disappears (including feeling warm), so leaving this up to the player is a good choice.


Super Attack:
  • First Degree burns are far too strong, they cause immediate, life changing injuries/scarring and most characters may not allow you to do that to them without explicit permission.
  • I would suggest the sensation of moderate-extreme burns which the player can decide upon.
  • You can also add in that the player can choose to take lasting damage if they would like to. This means that you don't have to worry about upsetting people, or people avoiding your character, because they're no longer being forced to have scars they may not want. If they want them, they'll take them from your attack!
  • Unfortunately, as with all senshi magic, once the duration expires the sensation/pain always goes away as a default. This means we can't automatically have them suffer from a fever for 4-12 hours after. As with your basic attack, you can have them experience this (if they so choose) for up to 4-12 hours after but you can't have it phrased that they have to experience it as senshi magic isn't allowed to have prolonged effects.


Eternal Attack:
  • Not going to lie, visually this attack looks awesome, but it's far too powerful. Unfortunately even our royal senshi can't do quite so much with their powers! xD;
  • I wanted to find a way for you to keep the visual, but we did need to do some balancing work with this ability to make it less powerful.
  • I would therefore suggest a dice move/roulette system for this. All three beasts can appear in the attack, but only one can attack depending on whatever number is rolled.
  • You can only have the beasts do one thing e.g. they'll either all have to attack, or all have to defend for this move. Based on his existing magic I had chosen 'attack' in my example but you can take the guidance away and play with it as much as you want until you're happy with what you have!
  • All three animals will appear on the field but only one will 'attack'.
  • Roll 1 - Summon Snake to attack target. The bite will poison the enemy for 30 seconds. When bitten, the area that has been poisoned will feel heavy/numb and tingly, and the limb will be more difficult to use. The player may choose to have this limb be completely unusuable if they would like.
  • Roll 2 - Summon Lion to attack target. The lion attacks the target with their claws, swiping at the target to cause the sensation of bleeding. Though visually different, this attack continues to poison the enemy for 30 seconds. Upon contact the poisoned individual will feel heavy/numb and tingly, and the limb will be more difficult to use. The player may choose to have this limb be completely unusuable if they would like.
  • Roll 3 - Summon Goat to attack the target. The goat will charge towards the target and headbutt them. The horns may leave scratches along affected limbs and imbue the target with poison that lasts for 30 seconds. Once struck, the poisoned area ill feel heavy/numb and tingly. This limb will be more difficult to use for the duration of this attack and the player may choose to have this limb be completely unusable if they would like; they may also choose to be winded by the headbutt as well.


The Missing Defence Part:
    Because most senshi magic needs to be carefully balanced so that they don't unfairly murder every Chaos being in existence (even if I am a hard core order fan girl haha), I haven't forgotten about the defensive part of the spell!

    This part of the spell is actually very similar to existing shield spells in the shop already and it's actually 'weak' enough when its on its own to be a Super attack. It can also block all damage at once. For that reason I would suggest that you consider placing this in to the 'enhancement' category if you would like for him to have all these abilities available to him. n_n

    Generally you can explain these abilities along the lines of:

    "Bellophoron summons the vision of a true Chimera around himself or his ally. While this ethereal beast is present, the target will be protected from any magical or physical attack that may come their way for a duration of 25 seconds. If more than one person attacks this Chimera it will disappear more quickly and Bellophoron or his ally will become vulnerable." etc etc



Apologies for the wall of text, but as mentioned I really didn't want to just say "No you can't do that!" and wanted to see if I could at least come up with something that would help, or provide you with inspiration on the type of direction you could go in.

If you'd like to take all of the above away and think about it, you can give me a shout again when you're ready.

For the most part your Basic/Super are fine, they just need tiny adjustments, so it's only your awesome looking Eternal attack we need to focus on. <3

Epine de Rose



SSBrosB


Springtime Noob

PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2020 8:01 pm


Epine de Rose
All right, I fixed it up so hopefully it should work this time? Tell me if I need to make it once for the Eternal or something!

And also I used a lot of your wording so... lol
PostPosted: Tue Sep 22, 2020 7:50 am


SSBrosB
Almost done, still bordering on a little too strong for his Eternal attack.

I know you want to have the ability to use all three but unfortunately Eternals are normally a One Time Use (or two time with significantly lower duration/power) ability.

You can raise his duration up to 45 seconds to meet the maximum duration of most Eternal attacks if you'd like, or play with the durations a little bit to give some room for an additional attack.

For this type of attack I'd honestly suggest a max duration for this one and then you can investigate getting something like the Metallic Bracelet to give you the extra usage of this ability when he reaches that stage.

Once again, this is up to yourself and you may choose to go a different route with it, but at the moment it has too many uses for an Eternal attack so that little bit needs fixed. n_n

Epine de Rose



SSBrosB


Springtime Noob

PostPosted: Tue Sep 29, 2020 7:45 pm


Epine de Rose
I hope that I interpreted that correctly! If not then I suggest we talk on discord so we don't have to keep going back and forth here lol.
PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2020 1:03 am


SSBrosB
Lol you will be pleased to know your patience with me has paid off (thank you so much!).

He's good to go from my end. <3

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Epine de Rose



Kyuseisha no Hikari

Crew

Dragonslaying Dragon

PostPosted: Thu Oct 01, 2020 6:52 pm


SSBrosB


I think the parameters of this are very much in line with a Senshi's abilities, and you have a unique eternal attack!

Have fun!

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