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 Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2014 11:08 pm
When do you start to give up arguing with the other person or people?
Is it when you realize that they're right?
Or do you start to not care about the argument at all?
When do you back down?
What annoys you about arguments in general?
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Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2014 11:12 pm
When do you start to give up arguing with the other person or people?
When the argument starts to get heated, I really do hate it when people try raising their voice. Or when insults start getting hurled at one another. I feel that when people start to loose all maturity in a discussion then it's best to drop it.
Is it when you realize that they're right?
If I realize that I was in the wrong, then I will admit so and try to calm the situation down.
Or do you start to not care about the argument at all?
It all depends, when someone starts yelling, hurling insults, tries to talk over me, I'll walk away.
When do you back down?
See above.
What annoys you about arguments in general?
When you admit that you were in the wrong, apologize for it and the other person is still trying to instigate another argument. Like seriously, grow up.
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Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2014 9:01 am
I'll admit, I can be pretty stubborn about backing down from an argument. I wish I could say that I never shout or hurl insults, but that would be a lie. It is a major weakness of mine (stubbornness) and I know I have to work at it everyday. I can say though that it is not half as bad as it used to be, thank God. Sometimes I would get physical, and it was then that it had gone too far. I don't do that anymore though, though sometimes I still shout.
I will concede when I realize the other person is right, which I never used to do. I will also give up if I know it's not going anywhere, like if neither one of us will admit they are wrong.
What annoys me most about arguments is actually myself, that I have such a hard time dealing with them. I don't like to argue at all, because I know that fire that gets in my head when I get mad will flare up again, and I would just rather not argue in the first place.
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Posted: Tue Jan 28, 2014 12:11 am
When do you start to give up arguing with the other person or people?Usually when one side or the other has made their point, or something distracts us... or the other person gives up. ninja Is it when you realize that they're right?South Polar Eclipse If I realize that I was in the wrong, then I will admit so and try to calm the situation down. There you go. 4laugh Or do you start to not care about the argument at all?South Polar Eclipse It all depends, when someone starts yelling, hurling insults, tries to talk over me, I'll walk away. This, but if they're using nastiness as a leverage for their side of the argument, I tend to be extremely bull-headed and turn the tables on them. When do you back down?I often warn people that if you're going to start an argument with me, ESPECIALLY if you already know what my stance is in the argument, you'd better be ready to see it through to the finish. I basically got tired of being pushed over when I was younger, and basically being forced to be wrong by virtue of not being allowed to finish, as opposed to judging by what I had to say. I used to be the one who was forced to surrender in frustration because the other side would not listen to me; now when they don't listen to me, it is they who surrender in frustration. What annoys you about arguments in general? When the opponent attempts to bully me into submission, as outlined above. And I don't like being forced to be basically bull-headed the way I see my arguments to completion, but I feel that it's better to be bull-headed than a bully. Oh, and I HATE it when the other person believes I'm the one who proves him right if I don't know the answer to something. ("What, you don't have an answer? See? I'm right, aren't I?") I remember when someone started an argument with me about Christianity (which at some point began to include evolution). Right away I could tell the person was trying to bait me into saying something that would make me look bad, or to make me say something contradictory. As we got deeper and deeper into the argument, I kept going in directions he just did not expect of me. (This is because he believed in many stereotypes about Christians, but I instead painted a true picture of what a Bible believer believes in.) I could tell he was getting more and more angry as we went along, and he started making veiled accusations against me, which I still was able to sidestep with scripture. Things like how Christians and anti-abortionists are hypocrites because they are the ones who blow up abortion clinics and kill everyone inside. At one point, he snapped at me, "Well don't you know the Pope believes xxxx?" To which I responded, "I'm well aware of that; but I don't care what the Pope believes in, I don't worship the Pope. I'm not Catholic. They think he's infallible, and I say he's human and flawed just like the rest of us." Very shortly after that, he swung around, about to punch the wall, stopped himself, then stomped out of the room basically yelling about how we should just agree to disagree. All I could think was, "Dude, you started this." It was almost laughable. Almost. (Just to be totally honest with you, the above wasn't necessarily a blow-by-blow account of said argument, I think I'm mixing one or two of them together by different people, lol. Not perfectly remembering straight, but basically that's the kind of scenario that sometimes happens to me in these arguments.)
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Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2014 10:29 am
When do you start to give up arguing with the other person or people?
If by argument, you mean a heated discussion..
I always take Proverbs 26:4 to heart.
"Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest thou also be like unto him. Answer a fool according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own conceit."
And..
Proverbs 29:9
"If a wise man contendeth with a foolish man, whether he rage or laugh, there is no rest."
So in other words, do not be like the fool and do the same things.. Also correct their underlying causes lest you let them continue in ignorance.
Do not be like them. Help treat their cause, not the symptoms.
If they become disrespectful and stubborn/illogical, stop and pray, talk about other things and try to disengage in the conversation.. It will only end poorly, and you will only feel drained.
Is it when you realize that they're right?
Assuming it is a logical discussion, conversation and debate. Absolutely.
Even if they are heated and I am not. Yes.
If I am heated up and I realize it. I stop then as well. I have done far too many debates in state competitions to care about 'being right'. I care about the truth.
Or do you start to not care about the argument at all?
When the argument is irrelevant, too unimportant, too heated and if I know it will go nowhere for them and/or myself
When do you back down?
1. I back down when I know I can no longer be respectful as our call is as Christians.
2. I back down when I am incorrect.
3. I back down when I know it is not productive for the other(s)
What annoys you about arguments in general?
What annoys me most is that you are on the offensive. You have closed up any common ground you could possibly have and now you see each other as enemies. Jesus never argued. He only answered. Even our Christian call which I purposely did not quote in the previous answer does not talk about arguing in our modern sense..
1 Peter 3:15
"But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:"
It means to give an answer or, in the Greek word "Apologia" which means "to give a defense". That hardly sounds like the arguments today. We should never be offensive, only share our lives and love. When we are asked or challenged, answer and talk it out. When they are done, ask a question, it isn't about losing a battle, it is about winning the war. If God is for us, who can be against us?!
Romans 8:31
"What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?"
So do as Jesus does.
The modern quote-
'Seek first to understand, then to be understood.'
-Is a great quote for Christians to take to heart.
Jesus already knew the deepest parts of their hearts. He knew exactly what they meant by a question. Always be sure you understand not only the question, but its meaning.
Romans 8:27-29
"And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God."
A great example is when Ravi Zacharias had been questioned by an intelligent, well-to-do man.
The man asked "Who made God?"
Ravi believe him to be insulting Christianity and so he said "I do not understand your question!"
The man thought that Ravi, being indigenous to India honestly did not understand due to a lack of fluency in English. So he did the only reasonable thing an American man would do. He spoke louder and much more clearly.
"WHO. MADE. GOD??"
Ravi still thought he was insulting him so he spoke rashly and said
"I have no clue what you are talking about!!! No one made GOD!! He has always been and always has been, he is self sustaining!"
The only man saved at the lecture that night was the man with that question. He had that one and only question keeping him from salvation. He needed the answer for it before he felt ready to believe in Jesus as his savior.
After learned this lesson from Ravi, I have been changed. So many people believe in Christ now that I have taught this to fellow believers! I am so excited to see what else scripture reveals.
I loved this topic.
God bless.
P.S.
The sword in Paul's time was supposed to be a defensive weapon, once you countered an opponent's strike, then and only then do you cut straight to their heart. Kind of like how we answer and find what they are truly struggling with and what their true intentions are: only then do we strike with the holy spirit's guidance. Of course, without God's guidance, we already gave up our position for Jesus Christ our savior and let them go on, walking all over us.
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