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 Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 6:31 am
Ive been thinking about making a new thread on here but I couldnt think of what to make it of until it hit me!
On the way back from Mexico, when we stopped to eat in Arizona I found the weirdest little book called "How to Confuse the Idiots in your Life!" Its really stupid and has no point what so ever to it, it doesnt even give you much advice on that but there are some funny things in there that I'd like to post.
Like this (these quotes are taken out the my book) :
Ex. If your gunna be a turd, go lay in the yard.
Ex. 2. See a penny pick it up and all the day you'll have a penny
Ex. 3 (My favorit one its kinda long)
Why does it seem that construction workers are never actually working?
Answer: Construction workers have a very difficult job. Because of the risks, there are certain weather conditions under which it is not considered safe for them to work, these include:
A. A firce blizzard defined as anything from 2 snowflakes or rain drops within any 24 hour period.
B. A tornato was sighted (anywhere in the US)
C. Server thunder storms, for instance, the kind that would come from those clouds over there.
D. Dangerous heat (Over 68 )
E. Dangerour cold (under 68 )
F. Servere life threatening hunting seasons.
G. Major holidays including Halloween, St. Valentines day, Grandparents day, secretaries day, boss's day, groundhog day, pets day, bacteria week, the annual rutabaga festival.
Ex. 4. whenever your brakes fail its ok to hit a moose.
Ex. 5 Beware of the floating Garlic cheese!
(See what I mean, nothing really in there answers the question the book is saying its going to answer x.x;; but there are a few funny things in here, since this makes no sense Talk about Nonsense here!)
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 11:20 am
rofl haha that was funny rofl
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 3:22 pm
.....interesting...... ninja
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 4:55 pm
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 5:23 pm
Yes. Very strange thingies.
More examples:
1. To confuse an idiot:
-Tell a Joke, leave out the punch line and laugh hysterically.
-Steal all their ducktape.
Other random things in the book:
-Whenever anything bad happens, find the rich guy and sue him.
-Whenever something good happens, find the rich guy and sue him.
-If nothing much is happening, go find a rich guy and sue him.
-Whenever the mongoose has had trouble catching cobras and the egale cannot see the rabbit, Who cares, find the rich guy and sue him.
-If you haven't succeeded in getting rich by suing the rich guy, forget the law and go to politics.
(I will randomly be posting stuff out of my book cause its nonsense.)
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 7:13 pm
I'm liking this book already!
surprised
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Music Never Stops Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 8:30 pm
More Nonsense and confusion:
-Turn the batteries around in their remote.
-Switch the hot and cold knobs in their shower.
-Move your lips but dont have any sound come out of your mouth.
-Print "Not to be taken Orally" on their Captin Crunch box.
-Shave their cat.
-Make them use AOL to accsess the internet.
-Put the word "NOT" in "Smoking can be Hazardourdos to your health" warnings on cigarette packages.
-Give them a candy with a pamphlit that says "May cause Diabities"
-On a day other than Halloween come to work (or school) in a Big Bird costume.
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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 9:52 pm
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Posted: Fri Mar 03, 2006 9:05 am
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Posted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 10:01 pm
I havent posted random stuff in a while.. -flips to random page-
-Cut 4 inches off their toothbrush
-Replace rest room stall locks with child-proof saftey lids.
-Tape a picture of a vampire on their mirror
-Drive everywhere you go in reverse.
-Instead of gang symbols or disgusting graffiti, write calsulus or triginometry equasions on bridge abuments and bathroom stalls.
-Dont bother to blame the flow smell on someone else if your the only one in the room
-Even small undies can give you a big wedgie.
(Thats enough for now, back to gold making n.n enjoy my weird book sayings)
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Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 1:56 am
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Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 11:25 am
Nothing new today cause I'm on a babysitting job x.x;; but I can tell you something new...o.o see this kitty on my shoulder, I just bought him and I have named him Sock! Sock says hello to all poll whores!
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Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 4:16 pm
*waves at Sock* Hi Sock!
Oh and the Big Bird one made me laugh.
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Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 8:04 pm
Status: Cant find my book at the current moment ;-;
But! I drew Sketches of random Gaia members here on Poll Whores Unite!
The following Members please be sure to take a look at the sketch in the Art Oasis under Kohana.
-Emerald Sun (I know you have already)
-[The.End]
-Karma Police
-[Ninja.Cakes]
-Quyrk
-it_landy
-Ana23
-sdrawcab
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Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 8:10 pm
"Not to be taken Orally"
That's hilarious! xd
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