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 Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 1:35 pm
〖 ❀ W E L C O M E ❀ 〗  Hey there, thanks for stopping by!
This is a quest thread for the Albino Tanuki Gachapon that I am currently questing.
Status: All ready for crits! *w* ♥
I'd love to get some feedback from everyone~
Thanks in advance! ♥ art by Shampoo-chan ♥
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 1:49 pm
〖 ❀ T A B L E of C O N T E N T S ❀ 〗
⓵ Welcome
⓶ Table Of Contents
⓷ About Miyuki
⓸ About Tanuki
⓹ About Tereya
⓺ My Coins
⓻ Reserved
⓼ Reserved
⓽ Reserved
⓾ Credits
⑪ Open!
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 6:18 pm
〖 ❀ About M I Y U K I ❀ 〗 ❀ B A S I C S Name Miyuki
.....❧ Meaning "Innocent," or "beautiful snow" in Japanese
Gender Female ♀
Species Albino Tanuki/Raccoon Dog
Age 17 in human years, exact age unknown
Stage Gatcha (Capsule)
Guardian Tereya❀ P O W E R S ＆ S K I L L S.....❧ Counterfeit Copy
Tanuki have the ability to multiply and making separate copies of themselves for any use they please, though the maximum number of copies they can make can only equal their age number in human years.
Upon creating the separate copies, the original's energy is divided equally amongst them and as each copy is eliminated, the energy will be returned. The copies are capable of doing anything the original can and won't disappear so long as the original is undisturbed, or that someone causes them pain (little things like pinches or flicking their foreheads), which would only effect that single copy and eliminate it.
Recreating the copies requires a lot of energy from the user and is only possible when all of the current ones are eliminated, then from there, a new batch can be formed.
Miyuki only tends to use this power only when she wants to remain hidden and would make one or two quick copies to do something for her from afar, like setting up a little prank and shortly after--she'll just merge back. However, after merging back, Miyuki tends to become disoriented and would likely have a headache. A couple minutes of rest will sure to help her recover, but the more copies she makes--the longer the disorientation will linger.
.....❧ Camouflage
Being an albino Tanuki, Miyuki is naturally capable of blending into the environment around her when there is snow because of her light-colored fur. However, when there is no snow around her, being albino causes difficulties. Thus, Miyuki is also able to become transparent and blend in amongst the bushes and trees instead.
Miyuki is more familiar with this skill as she has increasingly used it over her years to avoid predators and foes, but she has never tried to combine both of her powers together. Still, she has not mastered Camouflage yet and is only able to maintain the skill as long as she is near an obstacle, wall or barrier, or remains still and quiet. The most significant sign of a side-effect from keeping up this power for long durations is fatigue.♥ art by valyntineu ♥ ❀ P E R S O N A L I T Y❧ Virtues.....❧ Curious
Miyuki is a very curious girl, especially in her younger days. She had no one to teach her about the world, for her friends and family always cast her out from the group because of her abnormal coloration.
Without anyone to shed some light on what she would face, Miyuki spends more time on figuring out what to do than most and will try everything she knows. In spur-of-the-moment situations, she is unprepared and may respond in a way that she wouldn't have if she had more time to think on it.
Therefore, she always found out about things on her own and by herself, requiring no assistance from anyone. There are still things she doesn't know about and she is easily fascinated and distracted about anything new she encounters. Miyuki loves to learn about new things and yearns to grow with every discovery she makes.
.....❧ Optimistic
Miyuki tends to look on the bright side of things, and believes that every situation or thing has at least one good side to them. Therefore, she never fails to see the goodness in people and the things around her, possibly choosing to hold positive points higher than the negative ones. She doesn't realize that it is important to also look at the negative aspects of things and keep them in mind for good measure.
No matter what, she'll always try to convince and influence more people to look at things her way, voicing and sharing her opinion...although people don't always agree with her. She will not stop at a single "no," becoming increasingly stubborn and will continue to persist, only stopping when she realizes the others' annoyance if the person becomes visibly angry towards her.
.....❧ Empathic
Whenever she has the chance to be around other people, Miyuki tends to tune in on the emotions they are going through, whether through observation or just a vibe. She is quite sensitive to see people in such a state, setting aside her own needs to try to aid the other as she puts herself in their situation, taking on their emotions so she can better help them. Miyuki would be willing to help anyone she comes across, no matter the cost.
Sometimes, realizing someone's emotions, especially if the person felt negatively because of her own fault, influence, etc, will most likely upset Miyuki and make her feel guilty. Besides that, taking on another person's emotions drains Miyuki of her own and this leads her become worn out and depressed, leading her to isolate herself for the remainder of the day and becoming quiet. Yet with a new day starting--Miyuki will feel better and return back to her old self.
But from all that, Miyuki finds it difficult and hard to process when she receives gratitude or compliments. She would much rather be giving out the "thank you's" and compliments than take some for herself.❧ Flaws.....❧ Impatient
In the face of obstruction, Miyuki will become frustrated--possibly unnecessarily and accidentally lashing out at the cause or person. Of course, she'll apologize afterwards, but she will feel that no one understands why she does this. From being held back for so long in her childhood, she considers herself to be behind on many things and feels threatened if something stops her from catching up to everyone.
In extreme cases, panic may come in and make Miyuki feel as if her own survival depended upon the completion of as many goals as possible, as quickly as she possibly can. She just wants to make the most out of every moment she has. Because of this, Miyuki may either consider a person as helpful or as a burden, removing herself from the interference's presence when she can.
At times, Miyuki may ponder her position within the world and declares that it is so unfair that life is too short--and that she has wasted so much of it already. She feels nervous when spending too much time on a current activity when its outcome could lead to a very important thing that lies in the future.
Anything from failures, rejections and exclusion, from anyone or herself, will be taken heavily by Miyuki which causes her to grow even more insecure and fear if she would ever accomplish anything at all.
.....❧ (Manipulative) Trouble Maker
Tanuki are known to be tricksters and pranksters, and those traits are included in Miyuki--but in her own way. She entertains herself by pulling pranks on people, whether big or small, and loves watching them in action from afar (or when she's in camouflage).
Her gags and mischief however, may not be regarded as completely complex or clever, but maybe more silly, annoying or troublesome and will cause various amounts of damage depending on how a certain victim reacts to them. Although many seem to complain at how persistent and bothersome she can be with her trouble making.
Nonetheless, she still loves to plan out how her tricks will unfold and works very hard on them. Her targets are usually people who she finds interesting and pique her curiosity--in short, it's as if her pranks are experimenting with her subjects for her own interests.
However, when she gets caught, expect her to apologize from the bottom of her heart if it seems like her target is genuinely upset, though most likely; she'll be upset because her trick wasn't good enough to be successful or that she was found out. Sometimes her gags can be harmless enough, but she still gets scolded for her actions and told her trickery shouldn't be done at all.
All the scolding doesn't mean that Miyuki will stop at one time and be obedient, if she really is determined--she'll perfect that trick and play it out once again, perhaps on the same target, just for the sake of further experimentation.
At the end of it all, Miyuki is at her novice level of the generations-old art of the Tanuki. She is currently learning and practicing, adding each new shenanigan to her own personal collection.
.....❧ Insecure
Although she may seem cheerful or bothersome at times, all Miyuki really wants is to be accepted and appreciated by the ones around her. What she really wants the most is to have a friend whom she can really depend on since she has not had a person like this before.
Miyuki believes that if she can help as much people as she can, and be a positive influence to others--she'll be more likely to make more friends than enemies. Unrealistically, she strives to be liked by anyone and everyone, possibly sacrificing her own beliefs to please whoever she's currently with.❧ Quirks.....❧ From Excitement to Clumsiness
Oftentimes Miyuki can keep her composure and remain calm, but once she's excited about something, expect her to be a little off balance. When she's looking forward to something or about to do something new, Miyuki will always be a little more excited and enthusiastic than anyone else. Usually that will lead her to not watch her step, rush through things or even become slightly careless. She knows all too well that she should be careful, but sometimes she just can't help it.
.....❧ Protective of Attachments
If one were to come across anything that would be of value to Miyuki, expect her to be extremely protective and possessive of such things. A common example of this would be the protection of her precious hairpin.
This particular hairpin was found by Miyuki at a very young age one day, and is a symbol of personal reminder of happiness and warmth when she felt otherwise. It also is a representation of her cultural heritage, since she was born into a family of traditional Japanese Tanuki. Ever since then, Miyuki has become attached to the hairpin and has proudly worn it upon her head--absolutely refusing to part with it and let it be kept by someone else.❀ A P P E A R A N C E.....❧ Hair
Miyuki's hair is mostly white, but at the bottom tips it will slightly have more of a very light cream color tinted (see tanuki picture in next post).
Her hair is naturally wavy and is very long, but is kept in a ponytail (see ref) which is kept in place by her special and treasured Sakura hairpin (see link below). At the front, her two "side bangs" fall to her shoulders and are tied near the ends with hair ties that would usually match with her outfit. She has bangs that cover her forehead and are swept to the side, leaving a few stray hairs poking out (see link below or art).
.....❧ Eyes
Like most albino creatures, Miyuki has soft reddish colored eyes which contrast with her hair and skin tone.
.....❧ Skin Tone
Her skin tone is very light and somewhat pale, but with hints of pinkish hues throughout.
.....❧ Attire
I'm leaving this to artistic freedom, but I would imagine that Miyuki's wardrobe would consist of various Japanese styles (because of the Japanese origin of Tanuki) but they would be more modern and girly than traditional (maybe a mixture of this and this?) and complimenting her hairpin with warm colors.
Don't feel the need to keep to the Japanese theme completely (wooden sandals, etc), add accessories if you want (like leggings, etc). Since Raccoon Dogs are quite fluffy, feel free to add on any fur or fluff~ ♥❀ S P E C I A L T R A I T S.....❧ Fluffy White Ears
.....❧ Fluffy White Tail with Cream Tints near tips/edges
.....❧ Basic Hair Reference [♥] or see welcome art
.....❧ Wears her special Sakura hairpin to secure her wavy ponytail in the back
.....❧ Tanuki Plush similar to this [♥] and can be wearing some sort of flower accessory
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:21 pm
〖 ❀ About T A N U K I ❀ 〗 Normal Raccoon Dogs and Tanuki Pottery StatuesInformation credited to Wikipedia. ❀ G E N E R A LJapanese Raccoon Dogs, or tanuki in Japanese, are easily translated incorrectly to English, as badgers. Contrary to common belief, the Raccoon Dog is actually closer to the canid or fox family rather than the badger or raccoon family. Researchers are even debating to categorize Raccoon Dogs as a different species, since it does not completely fit into any existing ones.
The Japanese term is mostly used as a reference to its role in Japanese folklore, as it has a reputation of being jolly and mischievous, being a master of disguise and shape-shifting. Tanuki are often depicted as pottery statues, and displayed in shop fronts as a symbol of good luck.❀ P H Y S I C A L - C H A R A C T E R I S T I C SRaccoon Dogs have long torsos and short legs. But their tail is short, which ranges from 12 to 18 cm long and takes up less than 1/3 of its total length and hangs down without touching the ground. The ears are short, and protrude only slightly from the fur on its face, which has whisker-like hairs sticking out. The seasonal winter coat is long and has a thick, dense undercoat with coarse "guard hairs" measuring 120 mm in length. This layer of fur protects Raccoon Dogs from low temperatures during the winter or their hibernation period.❀ B E H A V I O U R.....❧ Diet
Raccoon Dogs are omnivores which often feed on small animals which would include insects, rodents, amphibians, birds, fish, and reptiles. Frogs are the amphibians they usually eat, and they are known to be able to dilute poisonous toxins with their saliva. When not feeding on meat, most Raccoon Dogs turn to grains, fruits and berries; which they are known to retrieve by climbing trees with their curved claws.
.....❧ Hibernation
Raccoon Dogs are the only known canids to hibernate. Like bears in the early winter, they increase their body fat to keep themselves warm as they hibernate. However, Raccoon Dogs only hibernate during severe snowstorms. Physical activity decreases in months like December, where the snow depth increases and because of this, they do not leave their burrows for more than a few hundred meters.
.....❧ Vocalizations
Despite being canids, they do not bark, like foxes would. They growl instead, and follow up with a long, melancholy whine. Captive specimens have been known to make a new tone of whine daily, like mewing when they are hungry for example. Japanese raccoon dogs make higher pitched sounds than domestic dogs would, and even sound similar to cats.
.....❧ Predators
Wolves are the main predators of Raccoon Dogs and many of them are during the spring and summer, but also during the fall. Other canines like red foxes are also known to kill Raccoon Dogs pups and adults. Aside from natural predators, Raccoon Dogs are hunted by humans for their long fur. The pelts and furs range from coarse-haired or silkier ones, and are usually used as decoration for drums or clothing such as hats and coats, as they are popular across the world.❀ B A K E - D A N U K IBake-Danuki are the most common kind of tanuki youkai (demon/spirit/monster) that appear in classic folklore and legends across Japan. In one of the oldest pieces of literature, an empress wrote passages that stated "in two months of spring...they turn into humans and sing songs." In another passage, it was written that they can shapeshift into other objects or people and were even rumored to possess humans, much like kitsune.
Common statues of tanuki usually depict them with large eyes to observe their surroundings and to help make good decisions, a large tail that provides balance and strength (until they achieve success) and finally, a warm and friendly smile.
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:23 pm
〖 ❀ About T E R E Y A ❀ 〗 ❀ B A S I C S Name Tereya
.....❧ Meaning "Shy," or "Shy Person" in Japanese
.....❧ Nicknames "Reya" for short
Gender Female ♀
Age 17❀ A P P E A R A N C ETereya has long, wavy brown hair that stops at her hips that she occasionally keeps braided. She wears magenta-colored frames from time to time though when she is doing any physical tasks, she lets them rest atop her head.
Tereya is always seen with a book of some kind, whether notebook, sketchbook or novel and tends to write, draw or read on her own rather than doing something else.
Her outfits are casual, comfortable and in calm colors. Rarely does she wear anything that is fancy, outwardly girly or attracts unneeded attention.❀ P E R S O N A L I T Y♥ art from zerochan ♥ .....❧ Wall Flower
Tereya is one that you would not immediately notice when you look upon a crowd. She chooses to blend in amongst everyone else, keeping quiet and to herself, even when she is on her own. It's not that she is afraid to speak up or be noticed by anyone, she just doesn't feel the need or desire to.
As a result, no one ever does interact with Tereya and she remains alone without friends, but of course, only on her own will. However, the occasional occurrence of chance encounters always comes her way and when forced to face others, Tereya can seem very shy and even flustered; on the sole account of unfamiliarity with it all. Not one person has made it their goal to associate with Tereya, but perhaps if someone did, she would be more comfortable with everyone.
.....❧ Observant
Although she may keep quiet, it doesn't mean she won't know or notice things. Just staying in the background can let one hear and see things they wouldn't expect. With the partial bits of conversations and the usual everyday routine, Tereya receives a lot of information and notes some things down for no reason but for her own knowledge.
.....❧ Independent vs. Selfish
She is capable of doing anything and does everything on her own--but only for herself. Tereya hasn't had the responsibility of taking care of anyone but herself and has never had anyone do anything for her sake. So as her basic logic goes, Tereya is only focused on herself and doesn't depend on anyone else.
.....❧ Silent Expression
With all of that time to herself, Tereya turns to the visual arts of painting, drawing and writing. Oftentimes, she shows no emotion on the outside, but on the inside still beats the heart of a teenage girl and this only leaks out in pieces of art. She likes to capture nature, especially serene and lone wintry scenes as she used to live in a colder environment.
Tereya likes to think on paper and excels in writing assignments, but no one ever gets to listen to her works come out of her own mouth. If they were written on paper, they will remain on paper. But of course, any of her works are always out of sight and reach, safe in her own hands.
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:29 pm
〖 ❀ M y C O I N S ❀ 〗
[10 Pts.] Green Coin x 8
[15 Pts.] Blue Coin x 6
[20 Pts.] Red Coin x 8
[50 Pts.] Purple Coin x 1
[200 Pts.] Silver Coin x 0
[500 Pts.] Gold Coin x 0
Total = 380
Updated as of 3/13/2012 ♥
Feel free to let me know if I've miscounted! ^^;
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:30 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:31 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:32 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:45 pm
〖 ❀ C R E D I T S ❀ 〗 ❀ G A C H A P O N - C O N C E P T.....❧ © Honeybii + lostandtold + Herbaceous❀ S H O P - A R T I S T S.....❧ © Honeybii + c h e e r f u l CYNIC + PandaLily + Suki_Daiyo4 + Saibraeus + Holy Bovine❀ M I Y U K I ' s + T E R E Y A ' s C O N C E P T S.....❧ © Me: XxFallenVVAngelxX❀ T A N U K I - I M A G E S.....❧ From Google Images❀ A R T W O R K of M I Y U K I.....❧ Belongs to me: XxFallenVVAngelxX
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Posted: Sat Mar 17, 2012 6:15 pm
〖 ❀ O P E N ! ❀ 〗
And...it's finally open!!
Feel free to leave any crits for me here or by PM!
All feedback is greatly appreciated~ ♥
I will try to update the content with new changes after every crit
and may quote you back to see if things are alright afterwards!
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Posted: Sat Mar 17, 2012 10:37 pm
Hi Fallen! First off, If half the stuff i'm writing makes no sense, ignore it or try to make heads and tails of it :'D;;. First off, I love her design, it's so cute! ; A ; i love the muted colours and her hair and SHE'S SO CUTE CAN I HAVE HER PLEASE? And your quest is organized really nicely. It makes it so much easier to read :'D;;
For her power of counterfeit copy, does she have the ability to make an infinite number of copies or can she only make a few? Does hurting one of the copies hurt her? Does copying herself take a lot of energy out of her? Do they all look identical or is there some way of telling them and the original apart? (you don't have to answer all these questions, but i'm just curious ; u ;. She can also have her abilities grow as she grows up! Even if they're limited now, she can always get better at using her skills as she goes on!<3)
Camouflage sounds good! It's a nice help for her albinoism!
Moving on to personality. Her virtues seem balanced, but I'm a little concerned about her flaws. While yes, they are flaws, it feels like the good kind of flaw. The kind of flaw that's kind of a virtue. (if that made any sense at all @_@)
- For soft-hearted, wouldn't wanting to help people be a good thing? To me, it feels like she puts others above herself when you write "She cannot resist helping someone... and often doesn't keep the situation or consequences in mind when she does." Maybe change that point to reckless? or is that too strong of a word? :'D From what i'm getting, it's that she's got a motherly complex or would sacrifice everything for friends/family.
- For naive, i think you can expand on how it's a flaw because currently it just kind of holds her virtue of ambitious high.
Relating both together, here's a few questions to think about. Does her naitivity and her friendliness get the better of her? Do people take advantage of her kindness? Is she naive to a point of cluelessness in everything she does?
For her quirks, i think they're adorable! Does she ever feel guilt from her pranks? such as if she went a little too far or someone got hurt along the way? and maybe 'excitable' is a better word for clumsy? She doesn't seem like a klutz the entire time, so i think she should get some props for being not clumsy most of the time<3.
I'd LOVE to see how Miyuki and Reya compliment each other and how Reya would grow from having Miyuki around! I think there's lots of room for a development of a good relationship between them!<3
If anything doesn't make sense, feel free to ask :'D i'm bad with explaining my thoughts into words.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 5:04 pm
Updated to here! ♥ Thank you so much for the critique! ♥
I'm glad that you find that things were easy to read and organized, and that you like Miyuki's design~
Your questions were really helpful and insightful, and don't worry, they weren't one bit confusing! >w<
I hope I've cleared up most of the questions you had with the edits I've just made, if there's anything else that's still unclear--just let me know! Thanks again~
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Posted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:07 pm
So, as with all critiques, you can take what you want and leave the rest. This is all just my personal opinion and thoughts, so interpret it as you will.
I will just be critiquing Miyuki at the moment, since the majority of the approval decision is based on her (as far as I know).
So, in terms of her replicating ability, how does this affect her? It's a little fuzzy on the specifics; does she become tired? Is it increasingly difficult to create new copies depending on the number that already exist? Can she only create copies of herself? Maybe expand on this a bit (although I don't know much about tanukis, so it may just be me).
With her camouflage ability, I have a similar question: how does this affect her? Can she maintain it for long periods of time? Does it become increasingly difficult? How often can she do it? How well does it work? Little things like that might be helpful to add in.
Her virtuous personality traits sound good, if a little bit canned and "cliche" for lack of a better word. I've seen these traits a lot in characters (mostly because they are actually very common personality traits to begin with), so you'll have to find some way to distinguish her.
At first glance, her flaws do not really...seem that bad. They seem a bit canned, as well, and make her seem just slightly "mary-sue", for lack of a better term. I don't mean to be rude, by any means, but those traits are common in terms of flaws. I can understand using naivety as a flaw, because that can certainly put people into sticky situations, but why, exactly, is she so naive? I could understand her being this way because of how optimistic she is (she always sees the good in people, for example), but right now, it doesn't seem to be very convincing as a flaw. Along the same lines, being selfless doesn't really seem like a bad thing. All I'm seeing, at the moment, are redeeming qualities (even "cute" qualities, which is no doubt what you were going for), and she seems a bit boring. She doesn't seem to be a very deep, well-rounded character; all her personality traits seem to be very similar, at least in my mind. Perhaps use her mischievousness as a flaw? Not everyone appreciates pranks, after all.
In terms of appearance, I'm not quite sure if you understand the true meaning of albinism. Albinism is the complete lack of pigment, and so her hair would truly be without any color (while this may seem like a platinum blonde color when looking at it, I'm fairly certain that it's just called white). Along the same lines, her skin would be as white as she could possibly be. There would be no color, no freckles, no nothing. If anything, you could say it was pink, since it lacks the pigment that normally conceals the pinkish tint gained from the blood running underneath.
Why is her sakura pin so special? Is it simply something that she thinks is pretty? Perhaps expand on that; I'm merely curious. Is there a reason that she dresses with an Asian influence? I do understand the request of fur, however.
Overall, you've got a good base. But please take the things I said about her personality into consideration. She seems a bit "overdone" in terms of how unique she is, and that doesn't really make for a very interesting character, in my mind. Try to think of some more flaws that aren't really seen as good or cute things. Can she be annoying because she's so optimistic (possibly tied in with her naivety, which really needs to be sold if you're planning on using it as a flaw)? Things like that would be good flaws to mention.
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