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 Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 6:45 pm
Okay I just came out and said I was bi to my friends about a month ago and I told one of my closest friends who I've known for 11 years now and he flipped. He said I was just confused and we argued and I asked him why he was so mad and he said it's because he was christian, which hurt because I am too. When I try to hangout he makes excuses, he ignores my texts and talks about me behind my back.
What should I do? My patience is dwindling -.-
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 6:55 pm
Well there's only so much you can do, the same thing happened to me with a friend I knew for 8 years. I'd tell him off, but if you're more of a peaceful type person then you'll have to wait for him to understand or explain it.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 7:03 pm
Well... There is not a lot. It was probably a rather big shock to him. Religious backgrounds also make these kind of things hard, probably why he said you were confused. The best you can do (as far as my opinion goes) is confront him openly, just walk right up to him and don't give him the chance to ignore you or make up an excuse not to talk. The worst thing you can do is get angry or irritable though.
Another thing is that he might feel confused himself, seeing how you've known eachother so long you've probably done a lot together and he might fear that things will get awkward or you might have a thing for him so he decides just to cut it off.
If you don't want to confront him openly just say that you understand that he's upset and that even though you've come out that that doesn't change that he's you're closest friend and that no matter what he does you wont hate him. Then since he's been your closest friend for so long he should understand that he over reacted and even though you're bi it didn't change who you were.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 7:40 pm
True friends never leave your side.
He left your side.
He's obviously not a true friend.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 7:54 pm
His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe."
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:08 pm
Guild MasterX2 His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe." No, he can. He just chooses not to. You can't force anyone to do anything; that's a given. But what you can do is stand up for yourself. Lay down the law; tell him that this is who you are, and there's nothing he can do to change or stop it. F$#% him it he thinks otherwise - it's not his life. It's your life, which should be more than enough of a reason to find other friends who will accept you for who you are. I honestly don't care for the amount of time you have been friends. If his insecurities are preventing further friendship, then, again, he's not a real friend. Trust me, you do NOT want people tainting the wonderful life that is LGBT. It's a gift, not a curse.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:12 pm
lgtenos Guild MasterX2 His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe." No, he can. He just chooses not to. You can't force anyone to do anything; that's a given. But what you can do is stand up for yourself. Lay down the law; tell him that this is who you are, and there's nothing he can do to change or stop it. F$#% him it he thinks otherwise - it's not his life. It's your life, which should be more than enough of a reason to find other friends who will accept you for who you are. I know... Its just that its hard considering the history and school experiences that kinda make me just want to sit there and take it instead of standing up
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:14 pm
Guild MasterX2 lgtenos Guild MasterX2 His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe." No, he can. He just chooses not to. You can't force anyone to do anything; that's a given. But what you can do is stand up for yourself. Lay down the law; tell him that this is who you are, and there's nothing he can do to change or stop it. F$#% him it he thinks otherwise - it's not his life. It's your life, which should be more than enough of a reason to find other friends who will accept you for who you are. I know... Its just that its hard considering the history and school experiences that kinda make me just want to sit there and take it instead of standing up I know it's hard. A lot of us, including me, have experienced something like this. I won't tell you a guide on how to deal with this because, again, it's your life. However, I still stand by my original statement when I said you need to surround yourself with people who cherish you for you.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:19 pm
lgtenos Guild MasterX2 lgtenos Guild MasterX2 His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe." No, he can. He just chooses not to. You can't force anyone to do anything; that's a given. But what you can do is stand up for yourself. Lay down the law; tell him that this is who you are, and there's nothing he can do to change or stop it. F$#% him it he thinks otherwise - it's not his life. It's your life, which should be more than enough of a reason to find other friends who will accept you for who you are. I know... Its just that its hard considering the history and school experiences that kinda make me just want to sit there and take it instead of standing up I know it's hard. A lot of us, including me, have experienced something like this. I won't tell you a guide on how to deal with this because, again, it's your life. However, I still stand by my original statement when I said you need to surround yourself with people who cherish you for you. Yeah. God how comes people online are so much nicer than the people I know in real life? Its hard to find people like that at my school since 90% of them are homophobes
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:25 pm
Guild MasterX2 lgtenos Guild MasterX2 lgtenos Guild MasterX2 His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe." No, he can. He just chooses not to. You can't force anyone to do anything; that's a given. But what you can do is stand up for yourself. Lay down the law; tell him that this is who you are, and there's nothing he can do to change or stop it. F$#% him it he thinks otherwise - it's not his life. It's your life, which should be more than enough of a reason to find other friends who will accept you for who you are. I know... Its just that its hard considering the history and school experiences that kinda make me just want to sit there and take it instead of standing up I know it's hard. A lot of us, including me, have experienced something like this. I won't tell you a guide on how to deal with this because, again, it's your life. However, I still stand by my original statement when I said you need to surround yourself with people who cherish you for you. Yeah. God how comes people online are so much nicer than the people I know in real life? Its hard to find people like that at my school since 90% of them are homophobes Lol, you think I'm nice? That's a first. I've been told I'm a jackass on Gaia. People just can't take criticism at all, let alone from a computer screen. Not my fault they have weak constitutions. Anyway, back on topic... Just remember to always live for yourself. Being happy is the most important thing in life. Everyone is happy for different reasons, but I know for sure that happiness doesn't include the bull%@#$ you're going through. Again, just be you, and everything else will fall into place.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:32 pm
lgtenos Guild MasterX2 lgtenos Guild MasterX2 lgtenos Guild MasterX2 His line is "I can't help the fact that I'm a homophobe." No, he can. He just chooses not to. You can't force anyone to do anything; that's a given. But what you can do is stand up for yourself. Lay down the law; tell him that this is who you are, and there's nothing he can do to change or stop it. F$#% him it he thinks otherwise - it's not his life. It's your life, which should be more than enough of a reason to find other friends who will accept you for who you are. I know... Its just that its hard considering the history and school experiences that kinda make me just want to sit there and take it instead of standing up I know it's hard. A lot of us, including me, have experienced something like this. I won't tell you a guide on how to deal with this because, again, it's your life. However, I still stand by my original statement when I said you need to surround yourself with people who cherish you for you. Yeah. God how comes people online are so much nicer than the people I know in real life? Its hard to find people like that at my school since 90% of them are homophobes Lol, you think I'm nice? That's a first. I've been told I'm a jackass on Gaia. People just can't take criticism at all, let alone from a computer screen. Not my fault they have weak constitutions. Anyway, back on topic... Just remember to always live for yourself. Being happy is the most important thing in life. Everyone is happy for different reasons, but I know for sure that happiness doesn't include the bull%@#$ you're going through. Again, just be you, and everything else will fall into place. Yeah I think your a great motivational speaker razz and yeah theres a lot but if you want to hear it id prefer to do it over PM
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:34 pm
It's up to you, bro. I'll listen if you want me to.
Side-note: We have the same armor (pauldrons + tabbard), except yours is red and mine is blue.
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:39 pm
Lmao. I only got red cuz it was cheaper at the time razz
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Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:42 pm
Pfft. No excuses. Blue is better.
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Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2012 3:52 pm
Guild MasterX2 Okay I just came out and said I was bi to my friends about a month ago and I told one of my closest friends who I've known for 11 years now and he flipped. He said I was just confused and we argued and I asked him why he was so mad and he said it's because he was christian, which hurt because I am too. When I try to hangout he makes excuses, he ignores my texts and talks about me behind my back. What should I do? My patience is dwindling -.-
That sucks. You could try one last time to talk to him, let him know that his actions are hurtful and he isn't being very Christian or a good friend. Honestly though, I don't think it'll do much good.
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