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 Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:29 pm
The beginning of my situation starts with me moving….
Me and my boyfriend were really happy together for id say about 9 or 10 months, maybe even a year. Then it all started to sort of fall apart as I had started to not see him anymore, but we would talk on the phone constantly and text each other daily…….
3 months later..
I logged into facebook about 2 hours ago, and decided to check out someones profile, a girl who added me. As I was looking I saw her relationship status was showing she was going out with my boyfriend. And thats not easy to say since on Facebook you have to get verification from the other person in order for it to show that you go out with them. (Ex: Relationship With: _______)
And I got pretty confused and angry. So I text him asking who that girl was. He confessed he had been seeing other girls just because I wasn't there anymore…..That tore me apart because I had dealt with long distance relationship drama like that before and never thought it would happen again.
Now he is saying he wants to kill himself so everything will be better, when that is the stupidest thing I had ever heard of. I've always had to convince him not to kill himself before, a few times in fact. And i've gotten to the point to where I wasnt to say "Do it! See if I care because I've had enough of trying to cinvince you to not do stupid things." but the problem with saying that to him is….
My mind hates him, when most of my heart hates him too, but theres a teensy bit left of my heart that still loves him. And I don't know what to do at all….
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I would like to deeply thank all the people who have given me advice and shared their experiences with me. It really has brightened up my mood for the night. I've made the decision to forget about him completely. As my mother recently just said:
"I had this feeling he was not right for you, he just wants attention and he is severely immature. You deserve much much better…."
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:32 pm
And now his girlfriend is cussing me out, saying in her words
"obviously moved on" and that i'm getting on his nerves.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:38 pm
I'm sorry to hear about your problems. I think maybe he should talk to a professional or something. I agree with you, that is a stupid way to put it. Have you explained to him that it wouldn't make everything better? It would make all his friends and family sad. There is much more to life than freaking out about a stupid mistake.
Edit: Just ignore her. It's best to get the answer from him. You maybe should ask him if you really are getting on his nerves. Tell him that if you are then you wont bother him.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:40 pm
-Noms Cuppycake- I'm sorry to hear about your problems. I think maybe he should talk to a professional or something. I agree with you, that is a stupid way to put it. Have you explained to him that it wouldn't make everything better? It would make all his friends and family sad. There is much more to life than freaking out about a stupid mistake. Yes I have, multiple times. And yet he still insists on thinking suicide is the answer.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:41 pm
man thats got to be the worst. I really don't know the best advice to give you is because I don't want something crazy to happen and the guilt reverted back to me lol.
Honestly though, Once a cheater always a cheater. You deserve better. Move on. Someone not being around isn't a very good excuse. If he felt that way he could have voiced his opinion but instead he decided to be greedy and break your heart. Not cool.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:41 pm
Uh, Hmm... I don't know... I wouldn't go back to him... Killing because of past is kinda dumb... Sorry, just saying... But I know that love will alwase be in you... Maybe give him a little chance?
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:42 pm
Virtual_Reality_Syndrome -Noms Cuppycake- I'm sorry to hear about your problems. I think maybe he should talk to a professional or something. I agree with you, that is a stupid way to put it. Have you explained to him that it wouldn't make everything better? It would make all his friends and family sad. There is much more to life than freaking out about a stupid mistake. Yes I have, multiple times. And yet he still insists on thinking suicide is the answer. Sometimes it's hard to tell if people are serious or just trying to get attention. It sounds like he should really talk to someone about it because there is absolutely no reason to just kill himself.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:45 pm
He just sounds like an attention whore... tbh
In all honesty, ******** him. He cheated on you in the first place, breaking your heart just because you 'weren't around as much.' That is bullshit. You have to move on, he obviously isn't worth your time. There should be really no question in this. If this happened to me, I would dump em, split all connection to them and their 'other' and just never talk to them again. They wouldn't be worth the breath.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:46 pm
Trina-Bell man thats got to be the worst. I really don't know the best advice to give you is because I don't want something crazy to happen and the guilt reverted back to me lol.
Honestly though, Once a cheater always a cheater. You deserve better. Move on. Someone not being around isn't a very good excuse. If he felt that way he could have voiced his opinion but instead he decided to be greedy and break your heart. Not cool. And also the worst part, he's always left me feeling confused and left out..
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:47 pm
BrokenJanders He just sounds like an attention whore... tbh
In all honesty, ******** him. He cheated on you in the first place, breaking your heart just because you 'weren't around as much.' That is bullshit. You have to move on, he obviously isn't worth your time. There should be really no question in this. If this happened to me, I would dump em, split all connection to them and their 'other' and just never talk to them again. They wouldn't be worth the breath. That's what i'm deciding to do right now….
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 7:11 pm
Virtual_Reality_Syndrome BrokenJanders He just sounds like an attention whore... tbh
In all honesty, ******** him. He cheated on you in the first place, breaking your heart just because you 'weren't around as much.' That is bullshit. You have to move on, he obviously isn't worth your time. There should be really no question in this. If this happened to me, I would dump em, split all connection to them and their 'other' and just never talk to them again. They wouldn't be worth the breath. That's what i'm deciding to do right now….
glad to help
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 7:16 pm
Wow, I know this is really tough for you and I'm sorry.....
I can only give you a little insight from my own past experience. I was in a very serious relationship with a guy who suffered from a few mental illnesses, bipolar and schizophrenia being two of them. Suicide threats and violence in general became pretty common place in our house and it took me a very long time to learn that I was in no way at fault or responsible for his feelings or actions. Just like you are not to blame here. I can't stress that enough.
In all likeliness, this is a "cry for help".... however that does not necessarily mean you should ignore him. If he tells you that he is about to do something life-threatening then call 911.
Again, I'm really sorry you are going through this. If you want to talk feel free to send me a pm.
Edit: And oh yeah, don't take him back. Cheaters will always cheat. And ignore the girl. I went through the exact same thing with my ex. Guys like this are manipulative............
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 7:29 pm
HE's not your responsibility.
TBH I can't believe he had the audacity to come crying back to you after having an affair. It's pretty disgusting....
Broken record, ect. but move on and don't talk to him...He has absolutely no right to come to you for pity.
ESPECIALLY since he didn't man up and tell you about the affair... cowardly s**t like that grinds my gears.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 7:43 pm
Virtual_Reality_Syndrome Now he is saying he wants to kill himself so everything will be better, when that is the stupidest thing I had ever heard of. I've always had to convince him not to kill himself before, a few times in fact. And i've gotten to the point to where I wasnt to say "Do it! See if I care because I've had enough of trying to cinvince you to not do stupid things." but the problem with saying that to him is…. My mind hates him, when most of my heart hates him too, but theres a teensy bit left of my heart that still loves him. And I don't know what to do at all…. This. His saying he wants to kill himself sounds like a selfish act of trying to get attention, I know because when I want attention I make it seem like I hate myself and would do whatever to make it right, which is simply to make the person feel bad for me. I wouldn't buy into it, but if he actually does kill himself, one less suicidal fool in the world. ( Hate me if you want for that comment) There is this one girl I know that I used to be with, we broke up but she still loves me, whenever we talk my heart sort of breaks because I know eventually I'm going to have to sever her love for me even though I no longer love her. Basically I don't like to see anyone sad. I'd say move on, if he's not faithful now he most likely never will be.
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Posted: Fri Feb 04, 2011 7:47 pm
Sink your teeth into forever...I know what that's like... except, we were still going out.... :/
Anyway, after reading a book about a girl who committed suicide... my view on it COMPLETELY changed... ._. In fact, if I thought suicide was bad before.. it's worse... and I've dealt with the loss of someone who had committed it... it's horrible... even though I'm not to blame, I feel responsible... Anyway, enough about me...
You need to talk to him. Tell him what it'll do to you and the people who love him if he does.. That's the best thing I can tell you...
And @Auction: He may not be her responsibility, but suicide isn't the answer... If someone knows someone is thinking about killing themselves, like them or not, you need to help them. or get someone to help them. He doesn't deserve the pity, or anything... but suicide is serious... and you can't just ignore it just because that person did something wrong. ...Sunlight burns, children surrender.
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