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 Posted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 10:43 am
Never Stop Dreaming...
Does it? Do you think there is an age limit when it comes to dating and marriage? Honestly, I'm very flexible on the subject. My parents are seven years apart, and my best friend's mom married her husband as soon as she turned 18 and he was 30.
I do not believe in love at first sight, but I do believe that if you love someone, age, sex, and appearance don't matter.
Discuss:
Does age matter? Do you believe in love at first sight?
Of That Beautiful Place..
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Posted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 11:03 am
I think age only really matters at a young age.. like when you are in your teens. >3
Just because there is a pretty huge difference in mindset between someone who is 15 and someone who is 19 and in college.. a 15 year old is worried about friends, meanwhile the 19 year old is worried about a career and trying to focus on a college workload.. but the 15 year old just wants to hang out all the time and doesn't understand that the workload is different in college.
Once you are.. I dunno.. it's hard for me to think of a number.. probably 25ish age stops mattering since you know what you want in life.. and a lot of people in their 20's 30's and 40's all want the same thing.
This is all just my opinion though; everyone is different. XD
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Posted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 12:02 pm
Some people just don't have the right mindset for relationship gaps like that
While one is still trying to grow up the other is already grown up & have expectations of the younger that they might not be able to follow..
Being someone that had a 6 year difference.. I know the struggles that go along with it.
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Posted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 12:13 pm
I think it depends on the people. Sometimes it works out.
Everyone matures at their own pace. I think its important that each person in the relationship understands what the other wants out of it. In any case.
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Posted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 12:17 pm
Love at first sight semms more like saying your in love with their appearence than the actual person. Now love at first conversation, thats a different story.
Honestly, I think it depends on the person. yes there is a mental age gap, but also, not everyone grows and matures the same way. But theres is that face that Lady Kira X puts in, both sides have different expectations of each other.
Ive done the 6 yr difference thing too, while we both were compatible in the fact we both thought to the future, we had other critical differences that broke us apart.
A big part that shows the younger's maturity and the actual attempt at a relationshipp is if the two can sit and talk, and discuss what they want out of the relationship and each other.
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Posted: Thu Nov 04, 2010 12:57 pm
s**t... I should just stay away. But distancing myself from disasters and catastrophes never was my forte, so... Here goes. Intoxikace I think age only really matters at a young age.. like when you are in your teens. >3
Just because there is a pretty huge difference in mindset between someone who is 15 and someone who is 19 and in college.. a 15 year old is worried about friends, meanwhile the 19 year old is worried about a career and trying to focus on a college workload.. but the 15 year old just wants to hang out all the time and doesn't understand that the workload is different in college.
Once you are.. I dunno.. it's hard for me to think of a number.. probably 25ish age stops mattering since you know what you want in life.. and a lot of people in their 20's 30's and 40's all want the same thing. No, you're quite right. No matter how mature someone appears to be, their personalities are not set. Those who are fully emotionally mature should not become involved with those who are not, not for any moral or ethical reasons but because in the blink of an eye the latter can change so completely, so utterly that it may as well be that the person you knew will be as though they never existed, leaving behind nothing but bittersweet memories and deep emotional scars. There will be nothing else left... If you're lucky. Lady Kira X While one is still trying to grow up the other is already grown up & have expectations of the younger that they might not be able to follow.. Basing expectations upon perceived maturity is never a solution. At the same time, it is intensely difficult to avoid. tatiana dusksong Everyone matures at their own pace. I think its important that each person in the relationship understands what the other wants out of it. In any case. No, in some cases it is simply impossible. Some people don't even know what they themselves want, no matter how certain they are that they do. And sometimes that changes... Sometimes quite suddenly. How much less destructive this would be if they were wholly emotionally unattached. necrofade Love at first sight semms more like saying your in love with their appearence than the actual person. This is nothing but an auto-justification for the intensely shallow. I think that we can all agree on this and remove it from the conversation, entirely. The shallow know not love, though the less insightful shallow believe that they do. necrofade Ive done the 6 yr difference thing too, while we both were compatible in the fact we both thought to the future, we had other critical differences that broke us apart. Two people can have tomorrow, but they have nothing if they don't also have patience, conviction, and devotion. Intensity counts for very little, indeed.
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Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2010 12:42 am
This is a tough one. For your best friend's mom, she's one of the few who could do it.
For many people, not only a maturity gap is an issue, but the elder of the two might feel social pressures from the gap if it's wide enough.
I'm going to say on principle, relationships of 5 years or more of a gap for people in the younger set (30 and below) aren't a great idea, simply because of the giant changes in place in ones life that happens every three years or so. For those who are older than 30 and want to be with someone say 38, I don't see much of a problem. As long as the two are in the same frame of mind with what they're doing with their lives, it could work out beautifully.
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Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2010 6:05 am
well I had this problem for a while. idk if it will help but my limits are 8 years other then that age doesnt matter unless your a minor because if you are I am going to jail lmao.
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Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2010 3:00 pm
Well mine and I are only two years apart with him 19 and I'm only 17, and still I notice the extreme differences in maturity. I feel that age matters and both involved needs to be aware of the differences, and are willingly to work around them or fit them in. He's graduated highschool, and now works while he plans to decide what he's going to college for, and I on the other hand am so ready to get out of highschool and on to college, because I know what I'm going for. He still acts so grown up and responsible, while I'm trying really hard to be a bigger person similar to him. In Life Skills, I was going over a 'Life After Highschool' course, and I suppose his working before college helped him grow up faster, because I remember when we were both ready to break all of the rules together, yet I'm not too worried where this is going. We both have three or four years worth of future plans that include each other, but about three or four months ago maybe more, I was really feeling the two year gap between us. He is so grown up, and I'm sitting here still messing around with highschool's fanatical notions- which I do enjoy. Yet, lately I guess I've started to grow out of it. I used to struggle to be on his level, until he told me that I shouldn't. Simply for the fact that I'll get there without forcing it.
Love at first sight is a little different. He says that he fell in love with me when he seen me after school once, running around with my pack of misfit friends. I, myself, couldn't pinpoint the moment of where 'like-like' turned into love, but the whole beginning of our dating experience with each other wasn't exactly normal, but remains feverishly exciting. But I don't know. I'm kind of lame.
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Posted: Tue Nov 30, 2010 12:27 am
For me, I'm 19 years old. My ex-boyfriend has just turned 24, and I'm still more emotionally mature, financially able, and just mature full stop than he is. Our relationship crumbled because I work hard to be sucessful at university and in my job, whereas he has struggled to find work for the past year. I know exactly where I'm going, and he doesn't. Regardless of how much I love him, I think that my knowing where I want to go intimidates him.
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Posted: Tue Nov 30, 2010 8:25 am
"love" doesn't "know" anything.
Only people know things....
That may seem like a smart a** answer to some people, but honestly its important to remember not to personify our emotions lest we excuse ourselves from certain behaviors/mistakes because of an abstract idea/emotion.
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Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 9:09 am
It depends though, if you're 14 and there is a 18 year old you like I find it fine seeing as how I was in the situation afew times.
I'd allow my teenage children (Hypatheticly speaking) to date anyone within a REASONABLE age distance. But there is the statutory rape law...
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Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 5:02 pm
I think that people relate love with sex too often. My own personal belief is that love knows no boundaries.
Love is blind,
Love is timeless,
Love is Love regardless of gender.
But sex on the other hand can sometimes be out of boundaries. I think it is only human if you are, say, 14 and are in love with even a 24 year old. But if you have intercourse when that person, that's when you're overstepping your limits. Because, of course, then it becomes illegal...>>
But to answer the question directly, no, I do not think love knows age. You can't choose who you love (I believe) and you don't get to choose what they look like, or how old they are.
Thats where I stand and how I justify myself as well. XD
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Posted: Sun Dec 12, 2010 3:24 pm
Personally, I think love does have some boundaries on age. I mean, there is a difference between loves. Like, I love my parents. But, I dont love them in an intimate type of way, of course. I love my friends, but not in that way... If you love someone a few years older than you, okay then. Thats possible. I mean, if your, say, 24 and you like some 47 year old, I dont think that'll work. They'd be almost 20 years apart! I just dont think that'd work...
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Posted: Sun Dec 12, 2010 3:32 pm
IIBlack-Embers48II Personally, I think love does have some boundaries on age. I mean, there is a difference between loves. Like, I love my parents. But, I dont love them in an intimate type of way, of course. I love my friends, but not in that way... If you love someone a few years older than you, okay then. Thats possible. I mean, if your, say, 24 and you like some 47 year old, I dont think that'll work. They'd be almost 20 years apart! I just dont think that'd work... I disagree. My grandparents are 19 years apart, and they've been together 40 (maybe 41 or 42) years now. My grandpa married my grandma when he was 41 and she was 22. They're the happiest people together I've ever seen. So while it might be viewed as odd or even frowned upon, it can work. With the right person, anyway.
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