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Writing with a group of people can either be a good thing or a terrible thing. I'm here to write about when things start to disintegrate. In 2004 I started writing with a group of friends (now ex-friends due to other extenuating circumstances) that lasted up until 2007-2008 (I don't really remember). Due to different schedules two of them started hanging out together alone and doing a lot of plot/character stuff without me. I never got a say in any of this and even when I tried what I had to say was ignored. They would change the plot every other week so I never knew what was going on. My character's suffered for it because their roles became progressively smaller and they had to change to fit the plot a number of times. Again, I tried to speak up about it and was chided for not trying harder. It was hard for me to carve out a place for my characters when the others were being given bigger roles in my absence. Mine might as well have been invisible. They would also give me a deadline to fix my stuff which I would end up having to change again anyway because they would once again rearrange the plot. Finally I left that project and agreed to work on something else with them. It was a story that was to take place in the 20s. I did all the research, set the plot, and had my characters ready to go. It ended up not going through because someone outside the group that they consulted with said "Well, you can't really write about a decade that you didn't live in." neutral That killed that part of the project because they agreed with him even though what he said isn't true. I eventually decided to hell with it and started thinking up something to do on my own. They were wasting my time and sucking the fun out of writing. I should have left when things first started going wrong. If you're going to write with multiple people make sure that you remain strong in the group and fight for your opinions no matter what. This type of thing doesn't need to happen again.

I agree it's important to write with someone who matches your skill level pretty well (even if you have different strengths-- which can be good). And to actually like the other person's ideas and writing. xd

From my own experience with co-writing, it's also important to have:

1. Trust/respect. You need to trust the other person to edit your work and change things, and they need to trust you to do the same. Everyone needs to be on the same page. You need to be willing to let them try something different, even if you're unsure about it, and they need to do the same for you. And everyone should trust that their opinions will be listened to and given fair consideration.

2. Communication. I think this is so important and is a big reason behind failed collaborations. Everyone needs to be in the loop. No running off and doing your own thing and expecting the other person to just be okay with whatever you decide. Clear expectations for who gets how much done and when, and communication when that's not possible. Otherwise one person might commandeer the project and start taking it over (sometimes without necessarily meaning to-- "they didn't get X done, I'll just keep going without them" and the next thing you know, they've made it their own story). Communication also includes how you agree to work together: alternate chapters? just pass back and forth whenever? set word counts?

3. Shared love of the story. Everyone involved needs to be excited about the story. It just doesn't work for one person to be really excited and love the story, but for the other person to be thinking they'd rather be writing something else.

4. Similar writing goals. If one person is just doing it casually and only wants to write for fun, and the other person is considering pursuing publication, that can be a problem.

Yeah, that sounds like a big mess-- glad you decided to back out! It can be tough to collaborate, even when everything is going well, much less when you have a situation like that. whee

I'm sorry to hear you've had such an awful experience with co-writing. I hope your love for writing hasn't suffered as much as you think it might right now, though!

I've had my ups and down with co-writing, but I think it's definitely helped my writing out in the end. My co-writer and I tried a couple of different methods for our writing before finding one that worked. For a while, we wrote primarily through IMs, each writing as certain characters that we had come up with, and on the rare occasion we'd write a larger chunk alone and have the other deem it good or bad. Then there was a period of time where we wrote on paper, still alternating characters as was appropriate. These days, we're back on the computer, but we tend to only write when we're hanging out. We bounce ideas off each other and, while we each still have characters that we consider 'ours', we've grown to the point where we can comfortably write the other's and have it work out well.

It's become a bit more strained overall these days, mostly because my co-writer's not as easily accessible online or in person, but we've been working together since November 2003 and I still consider us going strong. I don't think either of us will get to the point where we stop writing together, if only because the series we've been working is so deeply engraved in our lives now.

On another note, I want to agree entirely with Racheling's post about things important towards co-writing. Those four points hit home.