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 Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:28 pm
Today I lost a really great guy because he and I had different religious beliefs. Everything was great except for that one thing. I didnt mind him being a christian at all and never told him to change. He simply said he couldnt be with a druid and that was it.
How do you bounce back from something like this?
Is this common?
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who had different religious beliefs than you? Did it work? If so, how?
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 10:15 pm
Seeing as the druids are all long dead, I don't blame him wink
You'd bounce back the same way as you would from any relationship ending, wouldn't you?
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Sanguina Cruenta Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 11:50 pm
I'm sorry to hear that.. My boyfriend is catholic and before it got any serious I had a talk with him about my faith and that I wouldn't change for him and I dont ask him to change for me. =3 he completely understands. and things have been working out so far.
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Posted: Sat Jan 02, 2010 8:12 am
Sanguina Cruenta Seeing as the druids are all long dead, I don't blame him wink You'd bounce back the same way as you would from any relationship ending, wouldn't you? Well Ive never been dumped because of my religion. Usually its my randomness, busy schedual, or something like that. But this is different. With other relationships, I felt like I hadnt done anything wrong, so I didnt care. In this case though, I kinda feel like I was in the wrong. I waited six months before telling him (as if the signs werent freaking obvious! Cmon, what christian wears a pentacle? Really?) and he acted like I was a sinner. Five minutes before I told him, everything was great and we were fantasising about getting married, then after I told him, he pretty much acted like I had a deadly virus and wanted nothing to do with me.
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Posted: Sat Jan 02, 2010 8:14 am
lCobaltl I'm sorry to hear that.. My boyfriend is catholic and before it got any serious I had a talk with him about my faith and that I wouldn't change for him and I dont ask him to change for me. =3 he completely understands. and things have been working out so far. Does he have a brother? heart xd Lol
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Posted: Sat Jan 02, 2010 8:46 am
Miharu Starfang Well Ive never been dumped because of my religion. Usually its my randomness, busy schedual, or something like that. But this is different. With other relationships, I felt like I hadnt done anything wrong, so I didnt care. In this case though, I kinda feel like I was in the wrong. I waited six months before telling him Whether or not you were in the wrong largely depends on how you thought he would react here. If you knew your faith to begin with, before being with him, and that he wouldn't approve, and spun the relationship out for six months regardless... well, you've only yourself to blame, really. Quote: (as if the signs werent freaking obvious! Cmon, what christian wears a pentacle? Really?) Not too many, but it's been used as a Christian symbol too. Quote: and he acted like I was a sinner. Everyone is a sinner. *shrug* He is too. Quote: Five minutes before I told him, everything was great and we were fantasising about getting married, then after I told him, he pretty much acted like I had a deadly virus and wanted nothing to do with me. Better you told him then, surely?
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Sanguina Cruenta Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 5:07 pm
Sanguina Cruenta Miharu Starfang Well Ive never been dumped because of my religion. Usually its my randomness, busy schedual, or something like that. But this is different. With other relationships, I felt like I hadnt done anything wrong, so I didnt care. In this case though, I kinda feel like I was in the wrong. I waited six months before telling him Whether or not you were in the wrong largely depends on how you thought he would react here. If you knew your faith to begin with, before being with him, and that he wouldn't approve, and spun the relationship out for six months regardless... well, you've only yourself to blame, really. Quote: (as if the signs werent freaking obvious! Cmon, what christian wears a pentacle? Really?) Not too many, but it's been used as a Christian symbol too. Quote: and he acted like I was a sinner. Everyone is a sinner. *shrug* He is too. Quote: Five minutes before I told him, everything was great and we were fantasising about getting married, then after I told him, he pretty much acted like I had a deadly virus and wanted nothing to do with me. Better you told him then, surely? Yeah I guess its true that its a good thing I told him. I just didnt think he would mind. If you love someone, should it matter that they have a different religion than you?
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 5:41 pm
Miharu Starfang lCobaltl I'm sorry to hear that.. My boyfriend is catholic and before it got any serious I had a talk with him about my faith and that I wouldn't change for him and I dont ask him to change for me. =3 he completely understands. and things have been working out so far. Does he have a brother? heart xd Lol He does actually XD
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 6:59 pm
Mmmm. I highly agree with what Sanguina Cruenta. Waiting the sixths months could bring out a lot of resentment and the feeling that he was betrayed because you weren't honest with him earlier.
The pentacle, honestly, where I live, a lot of people where them without having any clue of it's meaning. So maybe he thought it was nice and you really didn't understand it. Or he himself didn't understand it.
But most important. Better that you told him. Please don't believe me to be cold hearted, because I know what it's like to be dumped for this, and other important things to me. But if he couldn't accept you because of your religion, then he wasn't meant to be with you. And it's better for you that he's not. I've run into plenty of people who've accepted me despite my religion. So maybe, just wait for that person to come to you. Because he will eventually. And you'll be happy ;3
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 7:30 pm
Yeah like everyone else has said it's best that this came out now because being open to each other is very important to a relationship. Don't take it personal though because your religion does not define who you are. It's unfortunate that this factor ended the relationship but it was something that was important to him. It's better that he was honest to you about it than he forcing himself to be in a relationship where he was uncomfortable.
I do want to give some hope. I am a Christian and my fiancee is an eclectic neo-Pagan. We're planning on getting married as soon as finances pan out. We are both open about our faith to each other. Religion can be a hurdle to a relationship but it doesn't have to be the "deal-killer" if both parties don't want it to be.
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 8:05 pm
Thank you all for your help and support. I feel a lot better now. His loss anyways. xd Who wouldnt want to marry all this sexy Druid? lol! I jk. My head isnt that big. Well I guess I just have to deal with the consequences of my LATE actions. Thanks again guys. Love you all.
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 9:14 pm
Sanguina Cruenta Seeing as the druids are all long dead, I don't blame him wink lol xp hey I'm sure there are some guys somewhere who are into the whole zombie thing
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 9:19 pm
Esselean Sanguina Cruenta Seeing as the druids are all long dead, I don't blame him wink lol xp hey I'm sure there are some guys somewhere who are into the whole zombie thing They are called necrophiliacs 3nodding
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 9:23 pm
lCobaltl Esselean Sanguina Cruenta Seeing as the druids are all long dead, I don't blame him wink lol xp hey I'm sure there are some guys somewhere who are into the whole zombie thing They are called necrophiliacs 3nodding Everyone likes to crack open a cold one.
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Sanguina Cruenta Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 9:28 pm
lCobaltl Esselean Sanguina Cruenta Seeing as the druids are all long dead, I don't blame him wink lol xp hey I'm sure there are some guys somewhere who are into the whole zombie thing They are called necrophiliacs 3nodding Well yeah but... I mean... they've been dead for a while. It's not like there's any meat left or anything. Although I suppose there's always the ******** option...
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