Lost Friend
6 years ago i had the most amazing best friend. He was 9 and i was 8. We were in 4th grade. We were best friends, we did everything together. His name was matt. In 4th grade boys were icky but secretly i had liked Matt. I met him on the first day of 4th grade. It all started when i lost my favorite pencil.
I had dropped my pencil somewhere. It was my lucky school pencil, everything went smooth when i had it. I looked everywhere for it. Then i was trying to find it and i bumped into someone.
"Oops sorry," i said innocently
"That's okay, what are you doing," Matt said curiously
"I lost my favorite pencil," I said sadly
"Here, have mine," Matt said handing me a a pencil
"Thanks but my pencil was special," I said rejecting the offer
"Oh well here have it anyway, its special because its from me," he said.
i smiled, "Okay ill take it."
"So wanna be friends?" he asked
"Yes please, my name is Chelsea," i informed
"Cool, mine is Matt," he said.
After we both knew eachother we sat next to eachother everyday. Years went by we stayed friends. We were going to graduate elementary school together.
One day during the 5th grade i noticed Matt wasn't at school. A whole week pasted, he never showed at school. When ever i called his house no one answered. I became to miss him deeply, he was really my only friend.
One day after school i was sitting on the couch with my mom. She was watching the news. A story came on, about a fire.
"House fire killed a whole family," the news reporter said.
"Sunday night the house lit on fire, everyone was asleep no one knew of the fire, by the time the fire was reported it was to late for this average family, none of them made it." she continued. When they showed pictures of the family i recognized one of them, it was Matt, he had died.
I never saw Matt again. I had lost my only friend.
It was the night before the first day of high school and i was looking at pictures when one of me and Matt came up. I started crying and asking myself how i was going to get through high school with my only friend i ever had dead.
I was a pretty girl. For the first two years in middle school i was asked out every week by a different guy. I never talked and rejected anyone who asked me out. I think that finally got the point i didn't want friends or a boy friend. Honestly i was scared to get close to anyone else. As a child i was abused. Matt was the only person i could tell he was my only get away but then he died. Even now i don't like coming out of my room, scared of getting close to people and being abused.
I woke up the next morning not ready to get up and get ready for school, I had to suck it up. I just got out of bed and started to get ready. I went downstairs and ate breakfast fast so I could get out of the house quick before my parents woke up. I ate quickly and left the house.
I went to the bus stop and waited for 30 minutes. I was always early because I only cared about getting out of the house before my parents woke up and came downstairs. As I waited for the bus I starting thinking. Flashbacks were going through my head. I saw me and Matt waiting for the bus. I saw Matt putting band-aids on my arm where my dad had hit me. Right then the bus pulled up.
I got in the bus and sat down. I sat in the middle. I didn't like the back two many people and I didn't like the front because the bus driver was always looking at me. I was thinking about how this school was going to be and how the kids were going to act. In my last school I was asked everyday by different kids if I cut myself. I answered no to everyone, it was the truth. I didn't even though sometimes I thought about it.
When the bus pulled in at the high school I thought great here we go. Kids were running around everywhere. I recognized a couple of them but I didn't really know any of them. I looked at the huge school thinking 'oh no kill me now' I just didn't want to go through high school. It made me miss Matt.
I sighed a really big sigh and then got off the bus. I walked into school. On the way I went up to the office to get my schedule and stuff like that. When I walked out of the office I started down the hall to get to my homeroom.
On the way I got lost and got hit on by a group of senior guys. Then I little farther down the hall I got made fun of a few senior girls thinking they were all cool. I finally got to my homeroom. I looked around for a empty seat.
I looked around. The first seat was next to a guy who looked kind of scary. He had spiky black hair with purple tips. He wore all black and was the only one not talking in the room. The next seat I saw was next to a girl who looked like she hadn't showered in about 5 months (Gross). The next seat I saw was next to a....uhhh wow someone who actually looked normal. Well, I thought he looked normal until he turned around. He looked just like Matt.
I went to go sit next to him. He was with a group of friends. He was talking to them, he seemed to be in the middle of a conversation. Then he stopped, when I sat down. He looked at me like he was trying to figure me out. I thought oh gosh here we go...I'm not interested. When he was done looking at me after about 30 seconds he went back to talking.
While he was talking I looked at him. He really did look like Matt. It was a little abnormal. He had longish brown hair and he had really pretty green eyes. He had what looked like really soft skin. He was wearing a red hoodie and black skinnies. He was kind of cute. Well he was really cute but I'm not looking for a relationship. I liked my amazing group of friends which included me, myself, and I.
After the bell rang, it was time for my first class, Math. I hated math. I got out of my seat and headed for the door. I walked into the math room. The desks were set up in tables of two. I sat down in one of them. I sat there and waited for the class to start. I started to think 'Me and Matt used to love math, tht was Matt's favorite subject, he used to help me when I needed it, he was the reason I got an A in that class.' All my thoughts went away when something hit me.
I looked to my side. There he was. It was him, the kid who looked like Matt.
"Sorry, my bad," he said sitting down next to me.
"Its okay," I said politely.
He sat quietly. I wanted the class to start, he was sitting really close and no one was talking it was really awkward.
"Hello everyone, welcome to 9th grade math, I'm Ms. Lamson.
"Hi," the whole class said back to her.
After she finished welcoming and getting to know everyone she got to her lesson. It was really boring but I just sat there silently and waited for the class to be over. I looked at the kid who looked like Matt a little. It was so weird how similar they looked. The bell rang meaning class was over. I got up and started walking.
I think the kid who looked like Matt saw me looking at him because after class he came up to me as I was walking.
"Hey, I'm Jason," he informed
"Hi, I'm Chelsea," I said keeping my head forward making no contact
"Looks like you're in all my classes," He said looking at my schedule.
"Ya," I said still making no eye contact.
"uhh...ya soo I saw you looking at me in math," he stated
"You look farmilar," I said trying to keep things short so maybe he would go away.
"Oh. well you kind of do to, I've seen you somewhere," He said
"Ya, well you never know," I was trying to walk a little faster now
"Ya. Oh my gosh I know where you are fr-!" He started to exclaim when his friends ran up to him and started an obnoxious horseplay.
I walked into my next class, science and sat down. This time Jason did not sit next to me. He seemed like a nice person but I'm not that much of a people person. Everytime I saw him he was glaring at me. I wanted to know what he was going to say.
A minute after I had totally zoned out (this class was soo boring) I got tapped on the shoulder 'oh gosh' I thought to myself. I looked over and Jason was trying to hand me a note. I took it from his hand and read it.
It said: "Hey, sorry my friends interrupted our conversation, and you looked a little annoyed with me, I'm sorry to bother you but its just you are really pretty and I have seen you before. I have to tell you this its important you know. So read carefully MEET MY IN NEAR THE FLAG POLE AFTER SCHOOL. please I really have to tell you this...thanks -Jason."
I was wondering whether to go or not. He probably just wants to get with me. On the other hand I think he really wants to talk to me about where he thinks he knows me from.
I went the whole day wondering whether to go or not. The bell rang and school was over, I went to my locker.
Finally the day was over. After thinking of it all day, i made up my mid and decided to go meet meet Jason. I walked outside to where i saw Jason. He waved to me. He didnt look that excited he just looked a little worried.
I reached where he was standing. I took my stuff and put it down, then we sat.
"Thanks," i said.
"No problem, soo i have to talk to you,"
"Ya okay im here, talk."
"Okay, so you said i looked farmiliular, do i look like someone or just farmiliuar?"
"You look like someone, and old friend of mine,"
"Okay thats what i thought,"
"What?"
For a minute he looked at me. Then he went into his bag and pulled something out. He showed it to me. It was a picture of me Matt, that he took of us 2 days before he died.
i looked at it, then looked at Jason.
"Whe-?"
"Wha-"
"Huh..."
i was trying to get out.
"This was in my room," he explained.
"What, how, huh?" i still was speachless, now i was almost in tears.
"I know i look like Matt, theres a reason.....im his brother.." he stated.
"What how?"
We looked at eachother blankly for a minute. Then he finally started to explain.
"We were twins. Our parents sepperated. I was with our dad, and he was with our mom, they hated eachother soo we never saw eachother. When he passed i came to live our mom because she was devastated. I got his room and found the picture and read everything he wrote about you."
Now i was in tears. Jason held out his arms and he held me until i was done crying.
By the time he had told me and I had stopped crying I had missed the bus.
"I would offer to bring you home, but I'm still only 15 and I cant drive yet, would you by any chance let me walk you home?" Jason asked
"Uhhh....ummmm..." I shrugged
I was kind of shaken from the news. It wasn't really that it was sad. I don't really know what it was. It made me miss Matt a lot though. It also just kind of came as a big surprise.
I kind of wanted time to think but I didn't want to be mean or anything.
"Ummm I don't really mind, either way," That was the best answer I could think of.
I started walking. I guess he walked with me, but we really didn't talk. He just walked quietly behind me. Finally when we were almost to my house he came to my side.
"Okay umm do you hate me?" he blurted.
"No."
"Oh. You kind of act like it."
"I'm sorry. its just that.....uhh well..." I wondered if I should tell him the story.
I finally came up with something to say. "I'll tell you what. I hate talking about it but I'll write my explanation for you," we were at my house. he nodded and then walked away saying only "see you tomorrow."
When I got in the house I went to my room. I knew I had to write the note explaining why I acted so unsocial. I didnt want Jason thinking that I hated him. I do like him. I just, well I'm scared. I didnt really want to think about Matt so instead of starting to write I went downstairs.
I went down to the kitchen. Still no one was home. I went into the refrigerator I got my self some juice and then I got some cookies and went back up to my room. I knew I had to start writing. Once I got into my room I heard a car door shut. I knew by writing it would make me sad but now that my dad was home I had nothing to lose.
I started writing "Jason, I don't hate you. You are a great guy. When you asked me if I hated you my stomach dropped. I act like that to everyone, but a little more to other people because I actually talk to you. The reason I act the way I do is mainly because of what happened to Matt. Its no ones fault it just happened. It was just I liked him a lot but then....ya he was gone. He was like my best friend and not I'm scared that if I get close to anyone else the same thing will happen. Thats why. Ouchh. well I guess ill talk to you tomorrow my dads home and hes about to come in and start yelling and hitting. OH by the way I wrote to you not because I don't want to talk to you but I just...when I talk about this I usually start to cry (sorry for the water marks on the paper)
Bye. "
I was in tears, suddenly my dad came into my room. "Why are you crying," he yelled "You think your life is hard I was just at work getting boasted around by people who think they run the place, I think I have it harder!" I put my head down. "Stop that!" He yelled more this time he hit my back. He hit me in the same place he hit me last time, he doesn't let one spot heal. It hurt more this time. I got up and wiped my tears. I walked downstairs and out of the house.
This happened all the time. I get home from school, chill for a while, my dad gets home, yells, abuses, then I leave the house. I always go to the same place. My favorite get away place. I always go this little grassy spot behind the trees in the park. It was my favorite place ever, when me and Matt played together we would have picnics here we would bring lunch and a little blanket. Then when we got a little older we brought two blankets and just sat under the stars together.
Now that there is no more Matt I just come here alone when I need time to get away. Sometimes I even slept there when I couldn't go home.
I had just walked out of the house. My dad was not yelling for me to come back, he didn't care, just like always. Sometimes I wished he cared but I knew that was just a dream. As I was walking down to the park I saw Jason. He walked up to me, "Hi do you have that note for me yet?" He asked. "Yes, actually here you go," I handed it to him. "Thanks," he said walking away.
I watched him walk away for a couple seconds trying to think whether I should call him back or not. Should I show him my get away place I thought. I want to be his friend, ill take a chance I decided. "Wait! Jason I want to show you something," I yelled. He turned around smiling, he walked towards me. "Yes?" he said. I want to bring you somewhere, its a special spot for me," I explained. We started walking to the park, we finally got to the park and I walked behind the trees. I reached the spot, and put down my blanket, then I looked at Jason.
"Me and Matt used to play here," I said looking at him "Now when ever i need to get out of the house i come here to get away."
"Oh. Well its really pretty."
"Yea, well did you want to chill for a little?" i asked hoping he would say yes.
"Sure," He said smiling.
I smiled back and then laid my blanket down. I looked at him. He really was a sweet guy, and he was pretty hot. I really did like him, but i was still scared to get really close.
"Do you live far from here?" Jason asked.
"Nah, only like almost a half a mile,"
"Oh."
"Yea," i said.
It was silent for a couple minutes. I laid down on the blanket and looked at the sky, until i realized the sunset. Then i sat up and watched.
"I read the note," Jason said quietly.
"Oh, yeah," I said. Oh no here its going to get emotional.
"I'm so sorry, I hope i can be your new Matt." he said smiling.
"You can try that friendship again," he suggested.
"I would like that", I said smiling a little. I felt the tears coming on.
One tear started running down my face.
"Come here," Jason said holding out his arms.
i got closer to him. Then he rapped his arms around me. Now he was holding me and it felt good. I felt loved for once. Like someone cared.
"Thanks," I whispered.
A little while later I told him we better get going home. I started to walk home.
"Hey, wait." He called to me.
"Yes?" I asked turning around.
"I had a good time with you." He flirted.
I smiled at him "Goodnight, Jason," I said.
He started to walk away now.
When I got home. I walked in quietly. The last thing I wanted to do was wake up my parents. If I did they would give me hell about leaving and coming back so late. I quickly and quietly went to my room.
When I got to my room I gently shut the door. Then I layed down and began to fall asleep.
------the next morning---------
"Wake up, why did me and your mother have to have a lazy a** like you." This is what I woke up to every morning. I rolled over and opened my eyes looking at him. Then I yawned.
My eyes were shut tightly as I was yawning when I felt a sharp hit on my stomach and then another on my arm. I opened my eyes and pushed my dad. He is big so it didn't do much. Pushing him wasn't the smartest idea because right after I took a fist to my eye.
I ran out of my room and down to the kitchen. I rinsed my eye with water and then got dressed and ate breakfast. After I looked in the mirror and realized I had black and blues near my eye and on my arm. I also had a huge one on my stomach. I checked the time and went to the bus stop.
On the way to the bus stop a car pulled over and honked. 'Oh another jerk,' I thought to myself. I was wrong it was Jason.
"Hey want a ride?" he asked.
"Sure, thanks" I said.
For a little while it was silent I noticed he glanced at me every so often. I looked at him and smiled. I real wasn't happy but why not pretend, right?
"What happened to your eye?" He said curiously.
I gulped.
"Uhhh...well...ummm...." I didn't know what to say.
"What?"
"My dad........"
"Huh?" he said confused.
"He uhhhhhhhh ummm ahhhahhh-abuses me," I finally got out.
"Oh my gosh im so sorry," he apologized.
"Not your fault," I said
"No I should have not let you go home last night," he insisted
"You.....................You didn't know," I said.
Right then we got to school and I got out of the car saying thanks fast not knowing if he heard me.
I cant believe I just told him my dad abuses me. My dad would like shoot me for this. He didn't even say anything about it. All he said was sorry, then nothing else. I don't think he likes me anymore. I think I will keep distance for a while.
The bell rang. I went to math. Of course Jason was there.
"Hey," he said.
"Hi," I responded softly.
"uh. I...I...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you or offend you in anyway,"
"No its not your fault,"
"I know but still," he said
"Don't worry about it," I said smiling.
I was happy he still liked me. Math was so boring. My teacher was going on and on with this stupid review about repeating decimals. I was taking a couple note and then Jason tapped my shoulder, I turned to him.
"Yes?" I said
"Chill tonight?"
"Sure, of course same place?" I asked
"Yes," he said.
"Okay," I said right as the bell rang.
I walked out of math and then headed to science. I was so ready for the day to be over. When we got to science I started to think. After I started to think about Matt and how Jason was just like him the day went way faster before I knew it I was heading for the bus.
The bus dropped me off at my stop and I started to walk home. When i got home oddly enough my dad was home early. I forgot it was Tuesday and my dad always gets home early on Tuesday. When I walked in he was standing at door, it seemed like he was waiting for me.
I silently walked passed him.
"What you don't say hi?" My dad said.
"Uhhh? Hi?" I said questioningly.
"Your teacher called today," he said sternly.
"Okayy?" I said.
"She said you were not paying attention and you spent all class talking to this boy." my dad explained.
"Oh." I said just wanting to leave the house.
I turned around and started to walk out. My dad pulled me back by my arm.
"Dont walk away from me," he said.
"Let go! Stop," I said struggling.
Then he pushed me into the glass TV stand. I hit the glass with my head and it broke, cutting my head all over. I cried out for help but I got no response.
The next thing I knew I heard sirenes. I didn't think my dad would call for help but he actually did. I got the feeling that maybe he actually did love me.
'Where am I' I thought. I opened my eyes. I saw a very plain room and I was in a bed with buttons all around me. I felt an itch on my noes. When I went to go itch it it hurt to move my arm. I looked at my arm and it was wrapped all over. I looked around the plain room and saw my mom.
"Hi, honey" she said.
"What where am I," I asked worried
"You will be okay, but I have to go to work," is all she said before she left.
When she left I closed my eyes. I didn't remember that much. Why did she call me honey? I remember her face but who was she. Then a strange woman in a weird baggy shirt came in.
"You have a visitor," she said.
The boy walked in.
"Umm...hi," he said.
"Hey?" Who was he?
"Do you remember me?" he asked
The boy had grey skinny jeans on. He had a red hoody with a white shirt underneath. He had longish brown hair. It looked from where I was that he had green eyes.
"Umm...I'm so sorry." I shook my head in shame.
"No, dont be I understand," he said.
"Do you think you could tell me a little about you?" I asked.
"Sure, I'm Jason...we are friends, good ones...um I'm the brother of your old best friend Matt..." he said.
"Matt had a brother?" I asked.
"So you remember Matt?"
Flashes of Matt went thru my head. He looked like him.
"Yes, yes I do," I said.
It was silent for a minute. I still had images of Matt in my head.
"Umm can you tell me where I am?" I broke the silence.
"Of course, you are at the hospital." He answered politely.
"Oh, that explains the pain," I said.
"Yeah," he said.
It was silent again. I had more flash backs. This time not of Matt.
I saw a guy grab my arm...then the guy took me and shoved me...I flew into a T.V stand and glass shaddered....I screamed...then I heard loud yelling..."Yes! thats what you get!" I shook my head and snapped out of it.
"Woah!" I said loudly.
"Hey, whats the matter," he asked worried.
"Um nothing I had a bad day dream," I said.
"You remembered why you are here probably,"
"I think so."
"yes its scary," "I mean you have to be careful running in the house, the steps are tough, I guess it cant get worse then sliding into glass, after tripping." he said.
"What? tripping?"
"Thats what they said happened,"
"No, he took my arm and threw me," I said in shock.
"OH MY GOSH I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!" He yelled.
"What you know who it was?!" I was anxious.
"Your dad!" he said quick.
"WHAT?!" I said
"yeah I remember you told me he abused you" he said
"I did.....oh......thats terrible why would he do that??" I said scared.
"I dont know but I'm going to tell a doctor, you have some rest,"
Jason left the room fast. 'What is wrong with me why cant I remember anything,' I thought to myself. 'I must have gotten hit in the head hard' I thought.
Right then Jason walked into the room. "Welcome back," I said smiling. "Hi," he smiled "they are going to question your dad," he said. "Oh." I was still kind of confused about that but I shook it off. "I'm really sorry I didn't remember you." I said, he was now sitting on my hospital bed. "Don t worry about it," he smiled. I sat up and then kissed him.
"Wow." he said. I smiled. "I hope if I get some sleep tonight I can remember," I said. He just smiled. He was looking at me. Then he smiled and chuckled a little. "What," I laughed. "You are just so pretty. Even when you don't remember, I don't know something about you.....I really like you." I smiled it was really sweet. "Thank you, I like you too." I said and then yawned. "Why don't you get some sleep, its getting late. "Okay," I said. He kissed my cheek, "Goodnight," he said.
Next morning:
When I woke up this morning I felt happier than usual. I tried to remember why. It finally came to me. I had kissed Jason last night. I suddenly started to remember everything.
"Hey," Jason said walking in.
"Hello," I said.
For the first time in two days I actually remembered his face. I remembered everything. It came to me....why I was here.
"My dad," I said in shock.
"huh?" he seemed confused.
"He hit me, worse than usual," I said.
"I know, I tried to tell the nurse but she didn't believe me,"
"Oh. " Then my mouth dropped open.
I was shocked at what i was seeing. My mouth was open in amaze. I could not believe what i was seeing.
"What?" Jason asked. Turning around. I guess he saw i was looking past him.
"Oh my gosh." He said.
Studdenly i felt a wave of fear go through my body. My dad was walking straight toward us.
"Hello," My dad said.
"What are you doing here?" i asked
"I heard your little friend tryed to tell the reason you are really here," He said.
I didnt know what to say.
He started to walk towards Jason.
"Dont you dare, ever, try that again." He told him
He pushed jason into the wall.
"DID YOU HEAR ME?!" he yelled.
Jason nodded in fear.
"Thats right, and stay away from my daughter," he continued.
Then he left the room.
"Jason," I said quietly and slowly.
He was still against the wall. His eyes wide open. He didnt answer.
"Is this what he does to you?" he said under his breathe.
"Yes," i said softly. "Hurts doesnt it?" i asked
"Well yea but thats not the point. I just cant stand knowing that under the smile you have when you are with me...is pain." he said.
"Dont worry. Im fine, im learning to live with it," i said.
"No, you shouldnt have to." he exclaimed.
"but i have to, and it is what it is," i said. I felt the tears coming. I turned over in my bed so he couldnt see my face.
Jason walked over to the other side of the bed, where i was.
"heyy, dont cry, i didnt mean-" i cut him off
"Its not you, im sorry, i just, im done," i said
"I know." he said. He took me in his arms, "I know," he wispered.
~~~~~~~~ More Coming Soon ~~~~~~~~
