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 Posted: Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:47 pm
Trying to convince your crazy depressed, self loathing, self-pitying friend that he's not a complete loser is quite the night killer. Seriously, I can't get him to stop wallowing in self hate and it's really starting to drain me. He's the obsessive type so when my other friend ended their relationship (didn't last long at all) he went a-wall. It's been over a month and he's just as depressed as he was when they broke up. I don't know what to do, nothing I've tried works. He doesn't listen at all.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 2:22 am
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 2:46 am
That happens to me too.
My friends see me as the one that can help them out of their self-hatred, but having people dump their problems on me just sucks me into a angst vortex, and leaves me feeling worse than them.
It's hard having your friends text you in the middle of the night saying they're gonna cut/kill themselves.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 4:20 am
wishes I could be there to be your 'cheerleader'... peeps that have depression are very hard to help~ (struggles w/ personal problem too)
I have a few friends that still wallow, but that makes it hard to just relax
though their pain still reaches me
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 7:25 am
I was like that, but I kept mine to myslef alot so no one really new I was. But it is really hard to get out of that place, I tried a lot of things to do so, and when things seem to be working, something would happen and would make me go back but only deeper, the harder I tried the worst it got. And well sometimes I did slip so a few of my friends new, but then again they were the same way. But they did write me letters telling me how much I ment to them and what they thought of me. Those letters didn't help right away, but now when ever I start feeling like that again I go back and read those letters and that keeps me from going back. I know it upsets you to see a friend so hard on themselves but you being the for them is the best thing you could ever do. Just think by listening to them makes you depress think of how the must feel to even be like that. I know cause I have been there. And by they way I feel guilty for making my friends upset for listening to me a few time, but I;m greatful I did cause they made me beleive I had a reason to live. Well I hope this was someone helpful to you.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 12:13 pm
I would have some sort of advice, but my advice is horrible. Especially because I fall under the self-loathing part.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 12:18 pm
Unfortunately, as much as you want to help your friend, until they are ready to change something/anything in their lives, there really isn't anything you can do. It's got to be one of the hardest things in the world, but until they decide they are ready to accept help, trying to be there for them is only going to burn you out.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 12:59 pm
At the lonely end of the rink... I'm really sorry about what you have to deal with. I have to go through with that a lot with my girlfriend, and I really want to help her but no one can help her but herself. It's something that the person suffering has to go through on their own. ...you and me.
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Symphonic Fairytale Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 1:04 pm
Thanks everyone for the advice and comforting words. It's just so hard to watch him be so psychologically self-destructive. Hopefully he'll stop soon.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 1:34 pm
At the lonely end of the rink... No problem. Keep us updated if everything turns out all right with him. ...you and me.
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Symphonic Fairytale Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 8:12 pm
Ugh, it's going to take a while. I thought he'd made some progress through the month. None hardly what so ever.
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Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 8:25 am
Bahh, it's so hard to deal with people like that. I've got a couple friends that are like that, and one of them being a girl who just complains about all these boys who will never love her blah blah blah. Maybe it's because she freaking messes with them mentally and then dumps them off right away.
And then she gets emo and destructive
And I have to convince her either that that person isn't right for her or that she'll find another or that they really do love her.
Drives me insane some people.
Usually ends up ruining my night because I pick up moods off of others.
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Posted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 2:04 pm
Hey, my friend does that too. We should should set them up. lol Jk. He's still to hung up on the other girl. Dx
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Posted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 4:15 pm
i would say to take him out on the town for a night, show him some fun (not that way to all the pervs i know will see this!) and get him to live a little
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Posted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 5:34 pm
I hardly get to see him, he lives 3 hours away. Dx
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