|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 12:58 pm
Announcement: 10.06.05
I've noticed that there's been a bit of god-modding in the story. It makes it very difficult for other people to pick up the story, or to gain intrest when every single attempt they make at picking up where someone else left off is nothing but thwarted attempts at developing rising action. Just try to remember that what really makes a story intresting is when your character has shortcomings and difficulties. If there's no opposition for your character to overcome or become defeated by, then there really is no story. Think of one of your favorite books. The main character doesn't achieve their ultimate goals on the first couple of pages. There are often many thwarted attempts and plot twists before anything ever starts to be achieved.
I would also like to see some more description of settings and actions in posts. The majority of the posts I'm seeing now are mainly composed of dialoge with a single line of non-descript action. Try to add a little bit more into fight scenes.
Description
This is a "continue the story" thread where you create an evil character of your liking, and interact with other members of the guild's characters. It takes place in the hidden city of Vilanos in the world of Gaia. (You may include prexisting characters from Gaia if you wish to do so).
Rules
*Keep the story in third person omnipotent; he, she, it, etc. (as in someone else is telling the story and knows everything about the characters, including what's going on in their heads).
*You are allowed to have only one evil character at a time. You are allowed to create up to two heros to oppose your antagonist; however.
*You must include a description of your character in your first post (physical as well as some personality traits), and you must do the same for any other new characters you introduce.
*You are not allowed to kill off someone else's character unless you have been given permission by the guild member to do so.
*All posts must me, at least, a paragraph in length and contribute to the story.
*No spamming.
*No god-modding
*Good spelling, grammar and description is highly suggested.
*Keep it PG-13ish.
Disclaimer
New rules may be added or older ones changed or deleted as the story contiunes. Please continue to check this first post for any updates. Any new rules or any that have changed will be highlighted in red.
Introduction
Beyond the outer boundaries of the world of Gaia, hidden from the world, lurks a cesspool of darkness, corruption and evil. A place where innocence, truth, heros and goodness are things of fairy tales and fables. This is a place where even the light from the Heavens fears to touch, unless it becomes swallowed and consumed completely; it's beautiful light smothered and never again seen by the eyes of honest men. This is a place where the villains of Gaia plot their maniacle plans of doom, destruction, domination and utter chaos. This is a city where evil reigns supreme... the dark city of Vilanos.
Even as we speak, it's citizens are preparing to wage war on the cities and peoples of this world...
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 1:35 pm
Seeing as I created the story, I might as well start it. xp Keep in mind my writing skills are a bit rusty and I hope this gives me some much needed practice.
------------------------
A seedy looking character emerges from the Vilanos Pub. She appears be a woman of unremarkable appearance; hands shoved in pockets, with eyes cast down to the pavement as she makes her way up a side street toward Main. She is around the age of 23 and of a medium stature, with long, lusterous, well groomed strawberry blonde hair. She is wearing a man's black leather jacket with a bit of white fur trimming the edges of the collar, unzipped and open at the front to reveal a strip of black, ribbed tank top. She is also wearing a pair of black leather pants, and black steel toed working boots. The essence of the woman she is was buried under the apperance of a rough and tumble tomboy. The features of her face may be considered mildly attractive if she ever dressed her gender, but this not being the case, she appeared to be more of a mildly, attractive effeminate young man. She has the look of quiet calmness to her, but her green eyes, the windows to her soul, show the glimmer of cold calculation and intelligence.
As she steps onto the half dead grass of the center terrace on Main Street, she stiffens as she notices some movement in the grove of shadows cast by the trees in front of her. Visiblity dropped even more as the light of the full, lustrious moon that continually shines on the city was quenched momentarily by a stray, puffy gray cloud. Her hands slowly slid from her pockets down to the cache of long, slender throwing knives strapped to her thighs. She squinted and tried as best she could to make out the figure that emerged from between the shadows in front of her.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 7:48 pm
It is a young man of 15, although he has the serious business-look of an adult. He bears a dark suit and cape, his eyes partially hidden under a matching black hat and dark, serious shades. His hands are covered by shredded jet black gloves and carry a worn, black sketchbook full of visions of terror and destruction. The young man has the feel of a manipulative, black soul. He looks at the woman in front of him with a twisted, dark smile and a glint in his eye.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Sep 21, 2005 5:34 pm
((Well, it actually looks like this will become a literate rp of some sort. biggrin As for title... Rise of Vilanos? confused ))
A petite young girl, looking not a day older than 11, watched from her hiding place in one of the tall trees. Her hair, a soft blond that could almost be called white, was done up in pig tails. Her pale yellow sun-dress looked colourless in the moonlight, nearly blending into her pale skin.
The girl had been out looking for a new "doll" when the scene in front of her started to unfold. A tomboy and a businessman had met in the street, grabbing her attention. Using the leaves as her coverage, her mouth formed a vicious smile unbecoming of her age as she watched. She wondered if a fight would break out. Either one of these two would make a nice addition to her "collection." If these two were to fight, who would win? Though, truthfully, the girl was much more interested in the loser...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Sep 21, 2005 8:54 pm
((Good title!)) The young man leans toward the tomboy. He whispers, "I have a proposition for you." He hands the girl a piece of parchment with some scribbly handwriting on it. With a dark wink, he turns and walks into the shadows, disappearing completely.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Sep 21, 2005 9:00 pm
Please meet me in the mansion in the western mountains at midnight. I have a job for you. I thank you in advance.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2005 8:19 am
The little girl was relatively disappoint that there was no fight. The man had disappeared before she could do anything, just after giving something to that woman. Her interest still held however. Perhaps she should follow this women for a while. She was quite curious...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2005 5:00 pm
The young man walks through the shadows, content with the fact that there was no battle. He was alone, after all. No minions were around to do his bidding, for they would be noticed. He wanted to stay hidden away from the thugs and bandits in Vilanos. They were not worth his time.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2005 5:14 pm
The young man left the cover of shadow, appearing in a dark alleyway. He could see the mansion from here. He smiled as he a brick with some anarchist graffiti. The brick pulled into the wall, triggering a sequence of brick movements. They bricks twisted and turned, pivoting to the left and to the right. They ultimately revealed a secret passage with a staircase that spiralled deep underground. He entered, tapping the brick again as he did so. The bricks shifted back into place, leaving the wall exactly as it had been 2 minutes earlier. Torches on the walls simultaneously ignited, showing bloody markings on the gritty bricks.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2005 5:24 pm
The young man walked down the staircase, emerging in a long tunnel. There was a track with a small, intricately designed cart. He climbed into the cart and hit a button, causing it to jolt into motion. It sped down the tunnel at incredible speeds, screeching to a halt at a similar staircase. The young man climbed the stairs and opened a door. Behind the door was a hallway in his mansion in the mountains. It was very fancy, with red walls and a checker board marble floor. Between each door was a painting with an elaborate golden frame. He went to his room, looking out the window over the mountains. He thought, "I wonder if that girl will pass my challenges..."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Sep 24, 2005 8:10 pm
on the other side of town an old woman wept, she is about 70 and looks like shes well over 100. her personality is much like her looks, cold and devious. She is weeping because she has lost another battle to that hateful little creature whose name she still doesn't know even though she has fought her on numerous occasions. yes I'll get my revenge she thought I'll have a new plan for the next time that spiteful litlle thing crosses my path....old mother my toe. I AM NO ONES MOTHER! she hurried off to her closet to find the thing that would help her defeat her foe, the thing hidden in the deepest corner of her closet.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Sep 24, 2005 10:23 pm
The young man smiled. He knew she wouldn't come. Not on time, at least. She would most likely wait days, even a week before she showed up. That is, if she conquered the mountain trail. She could already be dead. He cackled a cold, dark laugh. She couldn't be dead, not yet. It was not her destiny to die yet.
"Yawn! I'm beat. Manipulation is always so tiring."
He walked to his bed, dropped his clothes on the floor, and went to sleep staring into the sky. He visualized it all falling. Vilanos would rise up and take the world by the throat. But that would be another day...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 12:25 pm
Calesta took the folded and tattered piece of paper she had recieved from the young man out of her pocket for the umpteenth time and read it's contents over again, much like she did for the past few days. She was unsure of this "meeting." It smelled too much of an ambush or some other kind of devious trap, but she couldn't deny the call of greed. It had been weeks since her last job and she needed the money desperately.
"Well... Just sitting here's not going to get me any of the money I need, so I might as well take the job," she thought to herself pensively.
With a bit of a shrugging motion, she rose from her usual seat in the Vilanos Pub and made her rounds to the various merchants to prepare for her arduous journey into the western mountains. A trip made during the brighter parts of the constant night were trecherous at best, so she had to plan carefully and select her supplies with meticulous care.
After two hours of preperation and steeling her nevers, she began her journey through the mountains. Luck was on her side as she managed to avoid the major pit falls, only having a minor scuffle with some lesser demons that were easily dispatched with a throwing dagger to the skull, she approached the brick wall that ran the perimeter of the mansion. Even in the torch light, she could notice the very familiar dark and crusty stains of blood that marred its surface. She could not determine if it was human blood or that of an animal smeared on its surface to discourage tresspassing. Either way, she looked from the wall to the ominous shadow of a mansion that lay behind it. That sense of dread washed over her again, making her hair feel as if it was standing on end. With a shiver, she tore her eyes away from the mansion and began walking the length of the brick wall, trying to find some kind of gate or orifice for admittance onto the grounds.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 10:16 pm
The young man woke to the sound of a girl. She was walking the perimeter of the castle walls, trying to enter. He quickly dressed and had a minion lower the walls. He watched as the entire perimeter of the castle grounds sunk into the earth, being covered by dirt and grass. The tomboy had finally arrived. He grinned as he saw his plans coming together. He saw that suspicious glint in her eyes and suddenly realized she knew he was there. He opened the large window.
"I'm so glad you could make it, my dear," he shouted over the deafening winds. "Please, come in and make yourself at home."
He walked down to the entrance halls and welcomed her with open arms. He knew this was all pointless; a girl like this would never trust him. He just didn't feel right being impolite to a lady.
"Please, come with me to the living room."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Sep 27, 2005 8:13 am
Artaith had quickly become bored watching that girl when she obviously wasn't doing anything. If the little girl had not seen her walking off a few nights later, she would have forgotten the whole incident.
But as the little girl was cleaning one of her recently bloodied daggers, she saw the other girl walk towards the mountain pass. Artaith lost sight of her, but knew the general direction she went. "What do you think, Cory?" she asked her newest "doll." There was a soft but terrible moan from the corner of the dark alley she was in. "Let's go get Anna and take a look!"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
