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Hi I am a single parent of 2 children. Sky(5) and Haley (3) they have two seperate fathers. Thats a long story, but both their fathers are out of the picture. Thank God. But thankfully I have a best friend/ ex-bf who has been there all the time. God Bless him, he treats them as if they are his kids. We don't live with him... but we may soon.

Parenting is tough all the time, but tougher when you have to do all alone. All single parents deserve a pat on the back... and a hug, for doing twice the parenting as a couple would. As they say being Mom/Dad at the same time... or vice versa, for the males single parents in here.
Don't want to leave anyone out.

I can say my biggest fear is fear. I have panic/ anxiety disorder, makes things really much tougher. One day at a time. I am terrified of sending my 5 year old to school this year. I guess that is normal. My 3 year old is the most stubborn child on the planet, she is really hard to get along with, and extremely attached to only me. This is the only time I get a break.

It is rough, but honestly a childs love is worth all the hardships and obstacles we embrace.

Both of my daughters are from different fathers. I left the first one because he was very abusive and I worried about him hurting Torri. He now pays child support when he's actually keeping a job. rolleyes However, he only comes to see her sporadically. It's been since January 1st now. He doesn't see a problem with it, because in his eyes his paying child support allows him to be a part-time parent (he's told me as such, but not in those words) and when he does come to see her, he'll take her over to his house for a night or two (or the once a year week-long trip to grandma's at christmas) and he showers her with gifts. He never really gives her too much attention, though, as eventually he goes off to play video games while Torri plays with his girlfriend's children. He doesn't realise how what he's doing is going to affect her because she is always so happy to see him (nothing but good times at daddy's place! mad ) At this point, I don't think she understands much, but it will get worse as she gets older and she realizes how he puts his new son over her. stressed It pisses me off to no end!


My second daughter was from a somewhat abusive relationship as well, but he was only emotionally abusive and controlling. He ended up cheating on me and even though I tried to work through my trust issues, I never could, so I gave up and left him. We were together for a long time, durring which he was really the only father figure that Victoria had and he was always so down on Robert (Torri's dad) for abandoning her like that. He said that even though she wasn't his, he would never do that to her. rolleyes Well, he certainly lied about that, because as soon as I left him, he stated that she was "not my child, not my problem" and he ignored her to the point that when she tried to give him a fathers day present he refused it. He said, "That's for your daddy, give it to him." She was very upset and confused and had some extreme behavior outbursts for a while. I'm so angry with him for everything he's done to her! stressed He even made it seem like it was a punishment for my having left him! Now, I only allow him to come and see Teya (his biological daughter) when Torri is at school. He's been working for over a month now and I have yet to see any support from it.

Now, with my being pregnant with yet another unplanned-for baby I worry about her father as well. Even though we've been together for almost a year now and he's still the most wonderful man I've ever met. I guess I'm just paranoid because it seems like so many fathers out there are pretty crappy in the end. I don't even have a single positive father figure myself.... sad

I think it is great that you are managing to be so strong through what has obviously been a very difficult few years! Sometimes you can't help but wonder if the kids would be better off without their dads, but its never that simple! (luckily I don't have that problem with my ex)

I know how hard it can be to find it in yourself to trust when you have been treated badly in the past. I guess you just need to make sure that your partner now knows that it isn't about you not trusting him just about a fear of being put through the same thing again. I wish you all the best in your pregnancy smile

Metachronism...you ramble away girl...it does all of us the world of good. I totally understand where you are coming from. I actually don't think the 'god I've lost everything, my life is gone it's not fair' feeling is even limited to single parents. At one point or another the reality of how much your life has permantly changed hits you and there is an adjustment phase. I think apart from anything it's part of the realingment process. From personal experience and from a lot of what especially young parent on here say, a lot of people before they have kids were not really in control of their lives, or maybe just needed to get back on track. It takes a lot to change who you have fundamentally been for years. Of course it is more difficult when you are on your own. I was with my husband untill my daughter was 5 months (my son was already 2 1/2) but I'm lucky enough that he is a good dad even now we aren't together. I feel very lucky because it seems that ofen when a relationship ends the dad doesn't do his bit.

I say all the best of luck to anyone who is struggling with an unco-operative partner or just the difficulties of dealing with being a parent of any kind - because no-one really tells you this, but it' bloody difficult!!

hello.. I am a single mother of one. Im 20 years old. I rasise her with the help of my mom and step dad. I dont know what i would do with out them becuse the father is not and never will be in the pic.. but that anuther story.

hey everyone. if anyone want to chat just pm. Im on at least 2 or 3 times aday.. depends on when lilly is a sleep and i have nothing to do other wise